Smart couples recognize that pregnancy is more than a growing-a-baby waiting game. It is a prime opportunity to work through important relationship issues and strengthen your relationship. Having a baby can feel like it’s the Pregnant Lady Show, rather than an experience that you and your partner are working through together. But the journey of pregnancy, and the challenges it offers, are opportunities for growth — for both of you.  Using these moments during pregnancy will help you know how to work as a team, improve your communication, increase your emotional intimacy, support your emotional wellbeing, and lay the foundation for the happy, healthy family life you want for yourselves and your child... but only if you know how. This episode is going to teach you how to turn the pregnancy into a positive relationship growth experience, by navigating the pregnancy experience as a team. My guests D’Anthony and Rachel Ward are experts on this subject, and today they're sharing their wisdom with you. Join us! Xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby GrowingSelf.com PS: I have so much more to support you and your family in my "Happy Families" content collection. Tap in to find expert advice from the marriage and family therapists and parenting coaches on my team, as well as curated podcast playlists just for you. 

Smart couples recognize that pregnancy is more than a growing-a-baby waiting game. It is a prime opportunity to work through important relationship issues and strengthen your relationship. Having a baby can feel like it’s the Pregnant Lady Show, rather than an experience that you and your partner are working through together. But the journey of pregnancy, and the challenges it offers, are opportunities for growth — for both of you.  Using these moments during pregnancy will help you know how to work as a team, improve your communication, increase your emotional intimacy, support your emotional wellbeing, and lay the foundation for the happy, healthy family life you want for yourselves and your child... but only if you know how. This episode is going to teach you how to turn the pregnancy into a positive relationship growth experience, by <a href="https://www.growingself.com/navigating-pregnancy-as-a-team/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">navigating the pregnancy experience as a team</a>. My guests D’Anthony and Rachel Ward are experts on this subject, and today they're sharing their wisdom with you. Join us! Xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby <a href="https://www.growingself.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">GrowingSelf.com</a> PS: I have so much more to support you and your family in my <a href="https://www.growingself.com/the-happy-families-collection/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">"Happy Families"</a> content collection. Tap in to find expert advice from the marriage and family therapists and <a href="https://www.growingself.com/parent-coaching/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">parenting coaches</a> on my team, as well as curated podcast playlists just for you.

Navigating Pregnancy as a Team

There’s a sneaky relationship killer lurking in your communication… but you’ve probably never heard of it.  Negative sentiment override happens when you get into the habit of reacting negatively to your partner because of bad past experiences, even when it’s not really called for in the present. It makes it hard to let go of the past and make positive changes for the future, and it can keep you feeling bogged down in unsatisfying relationship patterns.  In this episode, I’m teaching you what negative sentiment override is, why it happens, and how you can break the cycle for a stronger relationship.  With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby growingself.com

There’s a sneaky relationship killer lurking in your communication… but you’ve probably never heard of it.  <a href="https://www.growingself.com/negative-sentiment-override/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Negative sentiment override</a> happens when you get into the habit of reacting negatively to your partner because of bad past experiences, even when it’s not really called for in the present. It makes it hard to let go of the past and make positive changes for the future, and it can keep you feeling bogged down in unsatisfying relationship patterns.  In this episode, I’m teaching you what negative sentiment override is, why it happens, and how you can break the cycle for a stronger relationship.  With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby <a href="https://www.growingself.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">growingself.com</a>

Avoid the Communication Killer: Negative Sentiment Override

You know that coworker who drives you nuts? Whether you’re dealing with a controlling coworker, a deadweight, or a bully, difficult people in the workplace can drag down your job satisfaction and performance.  So what can you do? This episode is all about how you can deal with the difficult coworker in your life and continue to succeed at work, no matter what.  I hope you’ll tune in! Xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby growingself.com 

You know that coworker who drives you nuts? Whether you’re dealing with a controlling coworker, a deadweight, or a bully, difficult people in the workplace can drag down your job satisfaction and performance.  So what can you do? This episode is all about how you can deal with the difficult coworker in your life and continue to succeed at work, no matter what.  I hope you’ll tune in! Xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby <a href="https://www.growingself.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">growingself.com</a>

How to Deal with Difficult Coworkers

If you’re going through a breakup, you know that missing your Ex is one of the toughest parts of the heartbreak experience. Even if you know the relationship is ultimately not right for you, it’s normal to look back on the happy memories and feel sad that your Ex can no longer be in your life. You might even question whether breaking up was the right choice, or if you should reach out and try to be friends. This episode will help you understand why you miss your Ex, what it means, and how you can transform those difficult moments into something that moves you forward. I hope you’ll find it helpful and healing.  With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby growingself.com

If you’re going through a breakup, you know that <a href="https://www.growingself.com/why-you-miss-your-ex/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">missing your Ex</a> is one of the toughest parts of the heartbreak experience. Even if you know the relationship is ultimately not right for you, it’s normal to look back on the happy memories and feel sad that your Ex can no longer be in your life. You might even question whether breaking up was the right choice, or if you should reach out and try to be friends. This episode will help you understand why you miss your Ex, what it means, and how you can transform those difficult moments into something that moves you forward. I hope you’ll find it helpful and healing.  With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby <a href="https://www.growingself.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">growingself.com</a>

Why You Miss Your Ex (and What to Do About It)

We've all been there: Your partner says something that just inflames you, and you say something you regret later. Or you instinctively defend yourself and withdraw when things get tense, rather than leaning into a healthy and productive courageous conversation. We all know that being able to react vs. respond is a cornerstone of emotional intelligence, and healthy relationships. But that can be easier said than done in the middle of a heated conflict.  When you’re frustrated, hurt, or stressed, you might raise your voice, say something you don’t mean, or make an impulsive decision with long-lasting consequences. All of this is bad news for you and for your relationships. But learning the art of being responsive versus reactive leads to deeper, healthier connections, and a life that’s directed by your true values.  That's what we're talking about on today's show. I hope you'll tune in! With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby growingself.com

We've all been there: Your partner says something that just inflames you, and you say something you regret later. Or you instinctively defend yourself and withdraw when things get tense, rather than leaning into a healthy and productive courageous conversation. We all know that being able to <a href="https://www.growingself.com/reacting-versus-responding/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">react vs. respond</a> is a cornerstone of emotional intelligence, and healthy relationships. But that can be easier said than done in the middle of a heated conflict.  When you’re frustrated, hurt, or stressed, you might raise your voice, say something you don’t mean, or make an impulsive decision with long-lasting consequences. All of this is bad news for you and for your relationships. But learning the art of being responsive versus reactive leads to deeper, healthier connections, and a life that’s directed by your true values.  That's what we're talking about on today's show. I hope you'll tune in! With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby <a href="https://www.growingself.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">growingself.com</a>

Communication Skills: Reacting Versus Responding

If you feel like you have to walk on eggshells around your partner, or work WAY harder than you should to make sure they're comfy (often at the expense of your own needs), my friend, you may be in an emotionally enmeshed relationship.  In fact, over many years of experience as a couples counselor and relationship coach, I've often found that the true underlying issue behind many relationship conflicts is due to emotional enmeshment and it's sister, codependence. This creates resentment, reactivity, pursuit/withdrawal dynamics and more. Good relationships require individuation, and a healthy self awareness of personal responsibility and healthy boundaries. So how can you create a healthier connection? That’s what this episode is all about! I’m talking about what enmeshed relationships look like, why they’re problematic, and how you can bring your relationship back into balance if emotional enmeshment is creeping in.  I hope you’ll join me! Xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby growingself.com

If you feel like you have to walk on eggshells around your partner, or work WAY harder than you should to make sure they're comfy (often at the expense of your own needs), my friend, you may be in an emotionally <a href="https://www.growingself.com/enmeshed-relationship/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">enmeshed relationship.</a> In fact, over many years of experience as a <a href="https://www.growingself.com/couples-counseling/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">couples counselor and relationship coach,</a> I've often found that the true underlying issue behind many relationship conflicts is due to emotional enmeshment and it's sister, codependence. This creates resentment, reactivity, pursuit/withdrawal dynamics and more. Good relationships require individuation, and a healthy self awareness of personal responsibility and healthy boundaries. So how can you create a healthier connection? That’s what this episode is all about! I’m talking about what enmeshed relationships look like, why they’re problematic, and how you can bring your relationship back into balance if emotional enmeshment is creeping in.  I hope you’ll join me! Xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby <a href="https://www.growingself.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">growingself.com</a>

Are You In an Emotionally Enmeshed Relationship?

Do you feel like you and your partner get stuck in a power struggle where you feel one way, they feel another, and you just cannot compromise?  Today's episode brings real-world relationship advice to help you communicate differently, so that you can break through the gridlock and get back on the same page. xo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby GrowingSelf.com

Do you feel like you and your partner get stuck in a power struggle where you feel one way, they feel another, and you just cannot compromise?  Today's episode brings real-world relationship advice to help you communicate differently, so that you can break through the gridlock and get back on the same page. xo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby <a href="https://www.growingself.com/power-struggle-in-relationships" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">GrowingSelf.com</a>

Power Struggles In Relationships

When someone we love, trust, and rely on betrays us, it creates a deep, painful wound that doesn’t always heal on its own. As a couples therapist who often works with people around heartbreak recovery after a bad breakup or divorce, and helping couples heal after infidelity, and even in my work as a dating coach, I know that betrayal trauma, or “relationship trauma,” is real, and it can linger on for months or even years without the right care, just like other kinds of trauma.  Even though relationship trauma is very common, it isn’t always recognized by our culture, or even by the people who are suffering from it. I hope this episode helps shift that for you. When you acknowledge the betrayal and how it impacted you, the door to healing and growth cracks open.  If you’ve experienced betrayal trauma, I hope listening to this episode helps you gain newfound compassion for what you’ve been through, as well as guidance and direction for how to heal and move forward. With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby growingself.com P.S. — For more help around repairing trust and healing after wounding relationship experiences, check out my  Heartbreak Recovery and Affair Recovery”collections of articles and podcasts.

When someone we love, trust, and rely on betrays us, it creates a deep, painful wound that doesn’t always heal on its own. As a couples therapist who often works with people around <a href="https://www.growingself.com/divorce-counseling-breakup-recovery/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">heartbreak recovery</a> after a bad breakup or divorce, and helping couples <a href="https://www.growingself.com/affair-recovery/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">heal after infidelity</a>, and even in my work as a dating coach, I know that <a href="https://www.growingself.com/healing-after-betrayal-trauma" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">betrayal trauma</a>, or “relationship trauma,” is real, and it can linger on for months or even years without the right care, just like other kinds of trauma.  Even though relationship trauma is very common, it isn’t always recognized by our culture, or even by the people who are suffering from it. I hope this episode helps shift that for you. When you acknowledge the betrayal and how it impacted you, the door to healing and growth cracks open.  If you’ve experienced betrayal trauma, I hope listening to this episode helps you gain newfound compassion for what you’ve been through, as well as guidance and direction for how to heal and move forward. With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby <a href="https://www.growingself.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">growingself.com</a> P.S. — For more help around repairing trust and healing after wounding relationship experiences, check out my <a href="https://www.growingself.com/the-healing-after-heartbreak-collection/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Heartbreak Recovery</a> and <a href="https://www.growingself.com/affair-recovery-collection/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Affair Recovery”collections</a> of articles and podcasts.

Betrayal Trauma Recovery

 Making a career transition can be a daunting task, especially if you’ve spent years building your expertise in a particular field only to discover you don’t love your work.  How can you know what career would actually feel more satisfying? If you already know where you'd like to go, how can you begin getting there? If you are ready for a career change, this episode will give you some pointers on where to begin. It’s a conversation between myself and my colleague Susan H., M.A., LPCC, a career counselor, coach, and professional development expert on our team at Growing Self. Susan’s point of view on career change is refreshing and insightful — I hope you’ll tune in!  xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby growingself.com P.S. — For more advice on changing careers with confidence, check out my “Career Clarity” collection of articles and podcasts.

<a href="https://www.growingself.com/how-to-make-a-career-transition-at-any-age/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Making a career transition</a> can be a daunting task, especially if you’ve spent years building your expertise in a particular field only to discover you don’t love your work.  How can you know what career would actually feel more satisfying? If you already know where you'd like to go, how can you begin getting there? If you are ready for a career change, this episode will give you some pointers on where to begin. It’s a conversation between myself and my colleague <a href="https://www.growingself.com/team/susan-h/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Susan H., M.A., LPCC</a>, a career counselor, coach, and professional development expert on our team at Growing Self. Susan’s point of view on career change is refreshing and insightful — I hope you’ll tune in!  xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby <a href="http://growingself.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">growingself.com</a> P.S. — For more advice on changing careers with confidence, check out my <a href="https://www.growingself.com/career-clarity-collection/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">“Career Clarity” collection</a> of articles and podcasts.

How to Make a Career Transition

Getting into couples counseling is a fantastic idea... but you have to know how to engage with the process in order to have a good experience. Unfortunately, it's very easy to make one or more of the super  common mistakes that can sabotage couples counseling.  I hope this episode helps you avoid that outcome, and get the help for your relationship you need and deserve. My guest is Jenna P., a marriage counselor and relationship coach on our team at Growing Self. She’s sharing her perspective on the seven things that can sabotage couples counseling, and how to have an experience in counseling that truly benefits you and your relationship.  I hope you’ll join us.  Xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby  growingself.com P.S. — For more advice on improving your relationship, check out our “Relationship Repair” collection of articles and podcasts. 

Getting into couples counseling is a fantastic idea... but you have to know how to engage with the process in order to have a good experience. Unfortunately, it's very easy to make one or more of the super <a href="https://www.growingself.com/seven-things-that-sabotage-marriage-counseling/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> common mistakes that can sabotage couples counseling</a>.  I hope this episode helps you avoid that outcome, and get the help for your relationship you need and deserve. My guest is Jenna P., a marriage counselor and relationship coach on our team at Growing Self. She’s sharing her perspective on the seven things that can sabotage couples counseling, and how to have an experience in counseling that truly benefits you and your relationship.  I hope you’ll join us.  Xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby  <a href="https://www.growingself.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">growingself.com</a> P.S. — For more advice on improving your relationship, check out our <a href="https://www.growingself.com/the-relationship-repair-collection/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">“Relationship Repair” collection</a> of articles and podcasts.

7 Things that Will Sabotage Couples Counseling

Learn how to create great relationships, feel happier, grow as a person, achieve your ideal career, and make good things happen in your life. Host Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby is a psychologist, marriage and family therapist, certified life coach and founder of GrowingSelf.com. Every week she answers your questions, interviews inspiring experts, and brings you new ideas to help you create the Love, Happiness and Success that you deserve.

A really practical podcast, giving concrete tools to apply to your life immeditely, given to you all the information in a relaxed manner. This takes away any overwhelmens that people have with love, happiness and success!

Practical Podcast!

I love the intentional at home and life and loss make more I love u DR.leasia

I love❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🖤

Learn how to create great relationships, feel happier, grow as a person, achieve your ideal career, and make good things happen in your life. Host Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby is a psychologist, marriage and family therapist, certified life coach and founder of <a href="http://GrowingSelf.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">GrowingSelf.com</a>. Every week she answers your questions, interviews inspiring experts, and brings you new ideas to help you create the Love, Happiness and Success that you deserve.

The Love, Happiness and Success Podcast With Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

One of the worst parts of going through a breakup or divorce is feeling consumed by thoughts about your Ex. Even if you know, intellectually, that the relationship wasn't good for you, it's still so hard to stop thinking about your Ex! On today's show, we'll be exploring why that is, and the steps you can take to free your mind, release your attachment, and get over your Ex — once and for all. For you!  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby GrowingSelf.com

One of the worst parts of going through a breakup or divorce is feeling consumed by thoughts about your Ex. Even if you know, intellectually, that the relationship wasn't good for you, it's still so hard to stop thinking about your Ex! On today's show, we'll be exploring why that is, and the steps you can take to free your mind, release your attachment, and <a href="https://www.growingself.com/how-to-get-over-your-ex/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">get over your Ex</a> — once and for all. For you! Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby <a href="http://GrowingSelf.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">GrowingSelf.com</a>

How to Get Over Your Ex

 I get so many breakup questions on our GrowingSelf.com blog and through Facebook from broken-hearted people looking for breakup recovery advice. More than anything, they want to know  how to get over a breakup. They have questions like: "How long does it take to get over a breakup?" "How do you get over a breakup when you live together" "How to stop thinking about your Ex?" "How to get over a bad breakup?" As you know if you've ever listened to my podcast, I have a special place in my heart for people who are in the midst of a bad breakup, and I really want to help. (You can read my own horrible breakup story here.) I thought that, instead of trying to answer so many specific breakup questions, it might be more helpful to everyone to learn more about the stages of a breakup. My hope is that in learning about the stages of a breakup, you can identify where you are in this process and get some direction for how to move past your breakup. I also hope that learning about the stages of a breakup will provide you with guidance about how to move forward after a breakup, no matter what stage of breakup you're currently in. I'll be sharing tips on how to move through each stage of a breakup on today's show. I hope that this breakup advice, and the breakup success stories I share help you find your way forward too. Yours in healing,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby www.growingself.com

I get so many breakup questions on our <a href="http://GrowingSelf.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">GrowingSelf.com</a> blog and through Facebook from broken-hearted people looking for breakup recovery advice. More than anything, they want to know <a href="https://www.growingself.com/getting-over-a-breakup-coping-with-pain/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> how to get over a breakup</a>. They have questions like: "How long does it take to get over a breakup?" "How do you get over a breakup when you live together" "How to stop thinking about your Ex?" "How to get over a bad breakup?" As you know if you've ever listened to my podcast, I have a special place in my heart for people who are in the midst of a bad breakup, and I really want to help. (<a href="https://www.growingself.com/how-to-get-over-a-breakup-advice/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">You can read my own horrible breakup story here.</a>) I thought that, instead of trying to answer so many specific breakup questions, it might be more helpful to everyone to learn more about the stages of a breakup. My hope is that in learning about the stages of a breakup, you can identify where you are in this process and get some direction for how to move past your breakup. I also hope that learning about the stages of a breakup will provide you with guidance about how to move forward after a breakup, no matter what stage of breakup you're currently in. I'll be sharing tips on how to move through each stage of a breakup on today's show. I hope that this breakup advice, and the breakup success stories I share help you find your way forward too. Yours in healing, <a href="https://www.growingself.com/denver-marriage-counselors-life-coaches-therapists/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby</a> <a href="https://www.growingself.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">www.growingself.com</a>

The Stages of a Breakup: How to Heal From Heartbreak

Stephan Labossier

Have you ever wondered what mistakes you might be making in your relationship? Or why new relationships seem to fizzle before they get off the ground? Relationship Expert and Dating Coach Stephan Lebossier is not afraid to tell you exactly what the problem is, and how to fix it. On this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm asking Stephan all your burning questions: What are some of the biggest mistakes men and women make in relationships? How can you become more attractive? What do you need to do to establish trust in a relationship? How can you open yourself up to love again, when you've been hurt in the past? His answers might surprise you! Get Ready For Love: Listen Now Questions? Comments? Ideas for the next show? Get in touch! www.growingself.com

Have you ever wondered what mistakes you might be making in your relationship? Or why new relationships seem to fizzle before they get off the ground? Relationship Expert and Dating Coach Stephan Lebossier is not afraid to tell you exactly what the problem is, and how to fix it. On this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm asking Stephan all your burning questions: What are some of the biggest mistakes men and women make in relationships? How can you become more attractive? What do you need to do to establish trust in a relationship? How can you open yourself up to love again, when you've been hurt in the past? His answers might surprise you! Get Ready For Love: Listen Now Questions? Comments? Ideas for the next show? Get in touch! <a href="http://www.growingself.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">www.growingself.com</a>

Get Ready For Love, with Stephan Labossier

Trust: It's the glue of secure attachment that holds a relationship together. If it's broken, everything changes. How to you repair trust once it's been damaged? That's the question we're tackling today on the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. You'll learn why "Sorry" isn't good enough, and you'll also learn the worst mistake you can make if you're trying to repair the trust in your marriage. I'll also teach you the five action-steps you must take to mend trust for real, and how to use them to restore the security to your marriage. I sincerely hope these ideas help you heal the trust in your relationship.  xo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby GrowingSelf.com

Trust: It's the glue of secure attachment that holds a relationship together. If it's broken, everything changes. How to you repair trust once it's been damaged? That's the question we're tackling today on the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. You'll learn why "Sorry" isn't good enough, and you'll also learn the worst mistake you can make if you're trying to repair the trust in your marriage. I'll also teach you the five action-steps you must take to mend trust for real, and how to use them to restore the security to your marriage. I sincerely hope these ideas help you heal the trust in your relationship.  xo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby <a href="http://GrowingSelf.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">GrowingSelf.com</a>

"Sorry" Isn't Enough: How to Repair Trust in Your Relationship

It's so, so hard to let go...   In the aftermath of a breakup or even divorce, many people continue on with their Ex in quasi-relationship "situationships." Living with their Ex, having sex with an Ex, being hang-out buddies with an Ex, or texting back and forth with an Ex are all common.  While this is understandable, it's also destructive. As a therapist, marriage counselor, and breakup recovery expert, I have had a ring-side seat to many, many relationships, divorces and breakup recovery situations. I've spoken to the broken hearted, as well as to their Exes and have learned a lot about why. On this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm sharing my perspective on:  Why people going through breakups often do self-destructive things in order to maintain their connection with their Ex Why having sex with an Ex is always damaging (but only to one of you) The power dynamics at work in every breakup How your Ex really feels about hooking up with you What post-breakup purgatory is really about… and what it does to your self esteem The magical thinking that people going through breakups are vulnerable to How to cut the cord and set yourself free  All the best,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby Ps: We discussed a number of resources in this episode. Here are the links to learn more:  The Stages of Healing From a Breakup  Our Online Breakup Recovery and Support Group Heal Your Broken Heart Breakup Recovery Program Our Facebook group 

It's so, so hard to let go... In the aftermath of a breakup or even divorce, many people continue on with their Ex in quasi-relationship "situationships." Living with their Ex, having sex with an Ex, being hang-out buddies with an Ex, or texting back and forth with an Ex are all common. While this is understandable, it's also destructive. As a therapist, marriage counselor, and breakup recovery expert, I have had a ring-side seat to many, many relationships, divorces and breakup recovery situations. I've spoken to the broken hearted, as well as to their Exes and have learned a lot about why. On this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm sharing my perspective on: <ul> <li>Why people going through breakups often do self-destructive things in order to maintain their connection with their Ex</li> <li>Why having sex with an Ex is always damaging (but only to one of you)</li> <li>The power dynamics at work in every breakup</li> <li>How your Ex really feels about hooking up with you</li> <li>What post-breakup purgatory is really about… and what it does to your self esteem</li> <li>The magical thinking that people going through breakups are vulnerable to</li> <li>How to cut the cord and set yourself free</li> </ul> All the best, <a href="https://www.growingself.com/denver-marriage-counselors-life-coaches-therapists/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby</a> Ps: We discussed a number of resources in this episode. Here are the links to learn more: <ul> <li><a href="https://www.growingself.com/the-stages-of-a-breakup/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">The Stages of Healing From a Breakup</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.growingself.com/online-breakup-support-group-online-divorce-support-group-breakup-group/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Our Online Breakup Recovery and Support Group</a></li> <li><a href="http://www.breakup-recovery.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Heal Your Broken Heart Breakup Recovery Program</a></li> <li><a href="http://facebook.com/drlisabobby" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Our Facebook group</a></li> </ul>

Should You Have Sex With Your Ex?

"We have communication issues" is probably the number-one complaint of most couples coming in for marriage counseling or couples therapy. Because this is so common, and so frustrating, I am re-releasing my three-part "communication problems" podcast series over the next couple of weeks. Start here: Listen to this episode to learn about the root cause of communication issues, and the ideas that will help you overhaul your approach. Next week we'll be talking about what to do if your partner's communication style is angry, hostile, or emotionally reactive. And then in the following episode we'll be talking about how to communicate with a partner who shuts down. I sincerely hope that these ideas help you both find your way back together again. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby www.growingself.com

"We have communication issues" is probably the number-one complaint of most couples coming in for <a href="http://www.growingself.com/marriage-counseling-denver/expert-denver-marriage-counseling/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">marriage counseling </a>or <a href="http://www.growingself.com/expert-marriage-counseling-couples-therapy-dtc-greenwood-village-parker-centennial/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">couples therapy</a>. Because this is so common, and so frustrating, I am re-releasing my three-part "communication problems" podcast series over the next couple of weeks. Start here: Listen to this episode to learn about the root cause of communication issues, and the ideas that will help you overhaul your approach. Next week we'll be talking about what to do if your partner's communication style is angry, hostile, or emotionally reactive. And then in the following episode we'll be talking about<a href="http://www.growingself.com/communicate-with-withdrawn-partner/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> how to communicate with a partner who shuts down.</a> I sincerely hope that these ideas help you both find your way back together again. xoxo, <a href="http://www.growingself.com/denver-marriage-counselors-life-coaches-therapists/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby</a> <a href="https://www.growingself.com" rel="noopener nofollow" target="_blank">www.growingself.com</a>

Communication Problems & How to Fix Them

Every one likes to toss around the phrase, "Get Over It." If you've been going through the pain of a loss you may desperately want to "Get Over It." But how does one actually accomplish such a thing? I've been a therapist in Denver for a long time, and have done my share of grief counseling. I know that wishing and praying to feel better, or anesthetizing yourself with booze or busy-ness does not work -- for long, anyway. Unfortunately the only way to the other side is through the process of grieving. I also know from my years as a therapist that there are many different kinds of losses that deserve the respect of grieving. Whether you are dealing with the a death, or a more subtle, hidden loss like the of a cherished relationship, a miscarriage, a pet’s death, a move, the loss of a dream, or the end of an era in your life: You need to grieve. It’s necessary in order to heal and move on. Today on the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm going to teach you about the step-by-step process of grieving. Listen, and learn how to help yourself "Get Over It" in a healthy, and authentic way. The only way out is through. Listen now to learn how to "Get Over It," and move on to the next chapter of your life.

Every one likes to toss around the phrase, "Get Over It." If you've been going through the pain of a loss you may desperately want to "Get Over It." But how does one actually accomplish such a thing? I've been a therapist in Denver for a long time, and have done my share of grief counseling. I know that wishing and praying to feel better, or anesthetizing yourself with booze or busy-ness does not work -- for long, anyway. Unfortunately the only way to the other side is through the process of grieving. I also know from my years as a therapist that there are many different kinds of losses that deserve the respect of grieving. Whether you are dealing with the a death, or a more subtle, hidden loss like the of a cherished relationship, a miscarriage, a pet’s death, a move, the loss of a dream, or the end of an era in your life: You need to grieve. It’s necessary in order to heal and move on. Today on the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm going to teach you about the step-by-step process of grieving. Listen, and learn how to help yourself "Get Over It" in a healthy, and authentic way. The only way out is through. Listen now to learn how to "Get Over It," and move on to the next chapter of your life.

How to "Get Over It"

Was that just a nasty fight? Or a sign that your relationship is failing?  As a longtime marriage counselor, I know that it can be hard to spot the difference. Some forms of conflict are healthy and even beneficial for relationships, while others are a signal that your emotional bond is on the rocks. You can prevent a breakup or divorce and keep your connection healthy and strong by learning what a failing relationship really looks like — and what you should be doing right now if your relationship is in trouble.  I hope this episode arms you with all the info you need to make important decisions for your relationship. Join me! xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby P.S. — For more advice on navigating conflict in a way that helps your relationship grow, check out our “Communication that Connects” collection of articles and podcasts. 

Was that just a nasty fight? Or a <a href="https://www.growingself.com/signs-your-relationship-is-failing" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">sign that your relationship is failing</a>?  As a longtime <a href="https://www.growingself.com/marriage-counseling/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">marriage counselor</a>, I know that it can be hard to spot the difference. Some forms of conflict are healthy and even beneficial for relationships, while others are a signal that your emotional bond is on the rocks. You can prevent a breakup or divorce and keep your connection healthy and strong by learning what a failing relationship really looks like — and what you should be doing right now if your relationship is in trouble.  I hope this episode arms you with all the info you need to make important decisions for your relationship. Join me! xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby P.S. — For more advice on navigating conflict in a way that helps your relationship grow, check out our <a href="https://www.growingself.com/communication-collection/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">“Communication that Connects” collection</a> of articles and podcasts.

Signs Your Relationship Is Failing

As a marriage counselor, I've learned through the years that there are fundamental differences between relationships that end, and ones that are reparable. And as sad as it is to work with couples who ultimately decide to split, in many cases it's really a good thing for both partners.  Of course break-ups are sad, and hard. There is loss, and grieving to do when your heart is broken. It's especially difficult if you're not the one who called things off. You have the right to be sad and hurt. And, I'd also like to offer you some perspective on why this break up may actually have been a good thing. Key points: 1) There was an unsolvable problem. 2) Your break-up saved you from a life of misery. 3) Your failed relationship changed your life for the better. Do you enjoy the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast? If so, please say so in the reviews and subscribe! Also, don't forget to check out my website, www.drlisabobby.com for more Love, Happiness and Success articles and advice, and to take my free online "Happiness Class." -- Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

As a marriage counselor, I've learned through the years that there are fundamental differences between relationships that end, and ones that are reparable. And as sad as it is to work with couples who ultimately decide to split, in many cases it's really a good thing for both partners.  Of course break-ups are sad, and hard. There is loss, and grieving to do when your heart is broken. It's especially difficult if you're not the one who called things off. You have the right to be sad and hurt. And, I'd also like to offer you some perspective on why this break up may actually have been a good thing. Key points: 1) There was an unsolvable problem. 2) Your break-up saved you from a life of misery. 3) Your failed relationship changed your life for the better. Do you enjoy the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast? If so, please say so in the reviews and subscribe! Also, don't forget to check out my website, <a href="http://www.drlisabobby.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">www.drlisabobby.com</a> for more Love, Happiness and Success articles and advice, and to take my free online "Happiness Class." -- Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

Why Your Break Up Was A Good Thing

There are false myths about men that are unhelpful to everyone; themselves, the people who love them, and their relationships. So on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, our mission is to understand men and "the male experience," especially when it comes to self-development. To this end, I've enlisted the support of my fellow couples counselors, therapists and life coaches, Zachary Gaiter, and  Seth Bender Here are just some of the questions about men we're discussing:  Why can it be so hard to get men to open up? Is it true that men are less likely to get involved in personal growth work, or want to pursue couples counseling? How can women help the men in their lives get help if they're worried about them? What are some things that men need to figure out, that women never even think about? What are some of the things that men really need their partners to know, but might not know how to say? What is the difference between a "guy" and a "man," in terms of male identity development? And what are some of the unique situations that men may be struggling with, but that never even get discussed?  All here for you, on today's episode of the  Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby www.growingself.com 

There are false myths about men that are unhelpful to everyone; themselves, the people who love them, and their relationships. So on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, our mission is to understand men and "the male experience," especially when it comes to self-development. To this end, I've enlisted the support of my fellow couples counselors, therapists and life coaches, <a href="https://www.growingself.com/zachary-gaiter-m-a/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Zachary Gaiter</a>, and <a href="https://www.growingself.com/seth-bender-denver-marriage-counselor-couples-therapist/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Seth Bender</a> Here are just some of the questions about men we're discussing: <ul> <li>Why can it be so hard to get men to open up?</li> <li>Is it true that men are less likely to get involved in personal growth work, or want to pursue couples counseling?</li> <li>How can women help the men in their lives get help if they're worried about them?</li> <li>What are some things that men need to figure out, that women never even think about?</li> <li>What are some of the things that men really need their partners to know, but might not know how to say?</li> <li>What is the difference between a "guy" and a "man," in terms of male identity development?</li> <li>And what are some of the unique situations that men may be struggling with, but that never even get discussed?</li> </ul> All here for you, on today's episode of the <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/love-happiness-success-podcast-dr-lisa-marie-bobby/id858864457?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Love, Happiness and Success Podcast.</a> xoxo, <a href="https://www.growingself.com/denver-marriage-counselors-life-coaches-therapists/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby</a> <a href="https://www.growingself.com/how-to-understand-men" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">www.growingself.com </a>

How To Understand Men

Getting Over Heartbreak For years now, it's been a personal passion of mine to help people recover from heartbreak. I know that when you're going through a bad breakup or divorce, it can be absolutely overwhelming emotionally. Most people describe feeling "obsessed" with matters related to their breakup: Thinking about their Ex, or plagued with incessant thoughts about what went wrong in their relationship, why the breakup happened, what it means about them, and — most importantly — when they'll ever feel better. For many people dealing with heartbreak, the unanswered questions, or confusion about what to do in different situations, are on their minds constantly. I get many questions from people in the process of trying to get over heartbreak, and I thought I'd take the opportunity to answer some of them today on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. We'll be talking through the following breakup questions:  "I was blindsided by my breakup, and feel totally confused about what happened. Should I try to have a 'closure talk' with my Ex?" "I was getting past my breakup, but then learned my Ex started dating someone else. Now I feel devastated all over again. Why do I feel so upset by my Ex's new relationship, and how do I move on?" "My Ex moved on quickly. Now I'm struggling with low self esteem after my breakup, and I can't stop thinking about my Ex. How do I move past this?" "I have to work with my Ex, and see him flirting with his new love interest who is also a co-worker. I have been feeling anxious and depressed as a result. How do I cope with this terrible breakup situation?"  Listen now to get some advice for how to cope with a breakup, get your confidence and self esteem back, start feeling like yourself again. If YOU have a question for an upcoming episode of the podcast, you can leave it in the comments section of this post, or call 720-433-1110 to leave me a voicemail that I may use on an upcoming episode. In the meantime, take care...  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby www.growingself.com P.S. Did you know that I host a free, online breakup support group on Facebook? This is not a therapy group, but simply a space for you to connect with other people going through a painful breakup. Breakups can be so isolating, but you don't have to go through this alone. This group is a secret, private group, so no one can see that you're a member except other members, and your posts will only be viewable to the group. If you'd like to join, please message me via Facebook, and we'll add you to the group.

Getting Over Heartbreak For years now, it's been a personal passion of mine to <a href="http://www.breakup-recovery.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">help people recover from heartbreak.</a> I know that when you're <a href="https://www.growingself.com/denver-therapy/heal-a-broken-heart/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">going through a bad breakup or divorce</a>, it can be absolutely overwhelming emotionally. Most people describe feeling "obsessed" with matters related to their breakup: Thinking about their Ex, or plagued with incessant thoughts about what went wrong in their relationship, <a href="https://www.growingself.com/why-your-break-up-was-a-good-thing/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">why the breakup happened</a>, what it means about them, and — most importantly — when they'll ever feel better. For many people dealing with heartbreak, the unanswered questions, or confusion about what to do in different situations, are on their minds constantly. I get many questions from people in the process of trying to get over heartbreak, and I thought I'd take the opportunity to answer some of them today on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. We'll be talking through the following breakup questions: <ol> <li>"I was blindsided by my breakup, and feel totally confused about what happened. Should I try to have a 'closure talk' with my Ex?"</li> <li>"I was getting past my breakup, but then learned my Ex started dating someone else. Now I feel devastated all over again. Why do I feel so upset by my Ex's new relationship, and how do I move on?"</li> <li>"My Ex moved on quickly. Now I'm struggling with low self esteem after my breakup, and I can't stop thinking about my Ex. How do I move past this?"</li> <li>"I have to work with my Ex, and see him flirting with his new love interest who is also a co-worker. I have been feeling anxious and depressed as a result. How do I cope with this terrible breakup situation?"</li> </ol> Listen now to get some advice for how to cope with a breakup, get your confidence and self esteem back, start feeling like yourself again. If YOU have a question for an upcoming episode of the podcast, you can leave it in the comments section of this post, or call 720-433-1110 to leave me a voicemail that I may use on an upcoming episode. In the meantime, take care... <a href="https://www.growingself.com/denver-marriage-counselors-life-coaches-therapists/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby</a> <a href="https://www.growingself.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">www.growingself.com</a> P.S. Did you know that I host a free, online breakup support group on Facebook? This is not a therapy group, but simply a space for you to connect with other people going through a painful breakup. Breakups can be so isolating, but you don't have to go through this alone. This group is a secret, private group, so no one can see that you're a member except other members, and your posts will only be viewable to the group. If you'd like to join, please <a href="http://www.facebook.com/drlisabobby" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">message me via Facebook</a>, and we'll add you to the group.

Dealing With Heartbreak? Your Breakup Questions, Answered.

What to do when your partner shuts down. Are you trying to have a relationship with a partner who avoids, defends or worse... won't talk at all? Few things are as frustrating, or as hurtful. It's hard NOT to get upset and angry when you're feeling rejected, unloved, or uncared for. The problem is that many people who clam up as a defensive strategy when things get tense don't understand how destructive their behaviors can be to your relationship. But there is help, and there is hope. Because these types of communication problems are so common, I thought it might be helpful to you if I put together a "Communication Problems" podcast-mini series. "Communication Issues" are the single most common presenting issue that brings couples to marriage counseling. The first thing to know about communication problems: Absolutely ALL couples struggle to communicate with each other from time to time. Just because it's happening in your relationship does not spell doom. Truthfully, by making a few positive changes in the way you interact with each other, you can avoid many communication problems -- and start enjoying each other again. In episode 1, "Communication Problems and How To Fix Them" we discussed the most important and empowering things you can remain mindful of if you want to improve the communication in your relationship: Systems theory, and your own empowerment to affect positive change. In episode 2, "Dealing With an Angry Partner" we addressed the oh-so-common "pursue / withdraw" dynamic that so many couples can fall in to. This idea is at the core of Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy -- one of the most well researched and scientifically supported approaches to couples counseling. (And what we practice here at Growing Self!) Specifically in episode 2, we looked at this communication pattern from the perspective of the "withdrawer" (i.e. the person in the relationship who might be perceiving their "pursuing partner" as angry or even hostile. In that episode I gave you some tips to help get back into the ring with your partner, some insight into why they may be so angry, and things that you can do to help soothe their anger and bring the peace back into your home. In the third and final episode of our "Communication Problems" series, "Dealing With a Withdrawn Partner" we'll be looking at this from the perspective of the partner who pursues -- the one who is attempting to engage with a partner who seems emotionally distant, avoidant, and unresponsive. If you've been feeling frustrated or angry because your partner refuses to talk to you, this one is for you. In this episode, I'm talking about what may be leading your partner to seem emotionally withdrawn, as well as things that you can do to help your partner come closer to you emotionally, and start opening up again. We're discussing:  The issues that may have nothing to do with you that are leading your partner to withdraw The biggest mistakes you can make when dealing with an avoidant-prone partner Strategies for dealing with your anger and / or anxiety if your partner is making you crazy Communication strategies to help make it easier for your partner to open up to you The paradoxical trick to making your partner feel more interested in coming towards you  I sincerely hope that this series helps you understand what may be happening at the root of your communication problems, as well as some real-world tips for things that can help you improve your relationship.  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby www.growingself.com

What to do when your partner shuts down. Are you trying to have a relationship with a partner who <a href="http://www.growingself.com/communicate-with-withdrawn-partner/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">avoids, defends or worse... won't talk at all</a>? Few things are as frustrating, or as hurtful. It's hard NOT to get upset and angry when you're feeling rejected, unloved, or uncared for. The problem is that many people who clam up as a defensive strategy when things get tense don't understand how destructive their behaviors can be to your relationship. But there is help, and there is hope. Because these types of communication problems are so common, I thought it might be helpful to you if I put together a "Communication Problems" podcast-mini series. "Communication Issues" are the single most common presenting issue that brings couples to marriage counseling. The first thing to know about communication problems: Absolutely ALL couples struggle to communicate with each other from time to time. Just because it's happening in your relationship <a href="http://www.growingself.com/marriage-counseling-denver/expert-denver-marriage-counseling/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">does not spell doom</a>. Truthfully, by making a few positive changes in the way you interact with each other, you can avoid many communication problems -- and start enjoying each other again. In episode 1, "<a href="http://www.growingself.com/communication-problems-and-how-to-fix-them/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Communication Problems and How To Fix Them</a>" we discussed the most important and empowering things you can remain mindful of if you want to improve the communication in your relationship: Systems theory, and your own empowerment to affect positive change. In episode 2, "<a href="http://www.growingself.com/communication-problems-how-to-fix-them-part-2-the-angry-partner/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Dealing With an Angry Partner</a>" we addressed the oh-so-common "pursue / withdraw" dynamic that so many couples can fall in to. This idea is at the core of <a href="http://www.growingself.com/evidence-based-therapy/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy -- one of the most well researched and scientifically supported approaches to couples counseling.</a> (And what we practice here at Growing Self!) Specifically in episode 2, we looked at this communication pattern from the perspective of the "withdrawer" (i.e. the person in the relationship who might be perceiving their "pursuing partner" as angry or even hostile. In that episode I gave you some tips to help get back into the ring with your partner, some insight into why they may be so angry, and things that you can do to help soothe their anger and bring the peace back into your home. In the third and final episode of our <a href="https://www.growingself.com/communication-problems-and-how-to-fix-them-part-3-when-your-partner-wont-talk/" rel="noopener nofollow" target="_blank">"Communication Problems" series, "Dealing With a Withdrawn Partner"</a> we'll be looking at this from the perspective of the partner who pursues -- the one who is attempting to engage with <a href="http://www.growingself.com/communicate-with-withdrawn-partner/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">a partner who seems emotionally distant, avoidant, and unresponsive.</a> If you've been feeling frustrated or angry because your partner refuses to talk to you, this one is for you. In this episode, I'm talking about what may be leading your partner to seem emotionally withdrawn, as well as things that you can do to help your partner come closer to you emotionally, and start opening up again. We're discussing: <ul> <li>The <a href="http://www.growingself.com/what-to-do-when-your-partner-has-a-problem/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">issues that may have nothing to do with you</a> that are leading your partner to withdraw</li> <li>The biggest mistakes you can make when dealing with an avoidant-prone partner</li> <li><a href="http://www.the-happiness-class.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Strategies for dealing with your anger and / or anxiety</a> if your partner is making you crazy</li> <li>Communication strategies to help make it easier for your partner to open up to you</li> <li>The paradoxical trick to making your partner feel more interested in coming towards you</li> </ul> I sincerely hope that this series helps you understand what may be happening at the root of your communication problems, as well as some real-world tips for things that can help you improve your relationship. <a href="http://www.growingself.com/denver-marriage-counselors-life-coaches-therapists/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby</a> <a href="https://www.growingself.com" rel="noopener nofollow" target="_blank">www.growingself.com</a>

Dealing With a Withdrawn Partner: Communication Problems, Part 3

Are you always walking on eggshells? In part two of our "Communication Problems, and How to Fix Them" mini-podcast series, we're going be talking about how to tame the tiger glaring at you from across the living room, and bring the peace back into your home. If you haven't already, please listen to the first podcast in this series (posted last week) to learn about some of the basic concepts that we'll be building on today. Then, we'll talk about:  Why your partner seems angry, irritable, critical, or hostile. What this dynamic does to your relationship, and the damage it can do unless you take action to stop it. What you can do to restore the emotional trust in your relationship, and start having conversations again -- instead of fights.  I sincerely hope that this communication advice helps the two of you, and makes it easier for you to talk to each other. With love and respect,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby GrowingSelf.com

Are you always walking on eggshells? In part two of our <a href="http://www.growingself.com/communication-problems-and-how-to-fix-them/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">"Communication Problems, and How to Fix Them"</a> mini-podcast series, we're going be talking about how to tame the tiger glaring at you from across the living room, and bring the peace back into your home. If you haven't already, please listen to the first podcast in this series (posted last week) to learn about some of the basic concepts that we'll be building on today. Then, we'll talk about: <ol> <li>Why your partner seems angry, irritable, critical, or hostile.</li> <li>What this dynamic does to your relationship, and the damage it can do unless you take action to stop it.</li> <li>What you can do to restore the emotional trust in your relationship, and start having conversations again -- instead of fights.</li> </ol> I sincerely hope that this communication advice helps the two of you, and makes it easier for you to talk to each other. With love and respect, <a href="http://www.growingself.com/denver-marriage-counselors-life-coaches-therapists/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby</a> <a href="https://www.growingself.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">GrowingSelf.com</a>

Part 2: How to Communicate With an Angry Partner

Am I in the "right" relationship? How do I find my soulmate? Are we truly compatible? Many people show up for dating coaching, life coaching or even marriage counseling with a lot of angst around these unanswered questions. People who are dating can wonder if they've found "the one." Premarital couples sometimes worry whether they're compatible enough to get married. And even married or long time partnered people can wonder if their relationship issues are due to their being too different. (Or having "perpetual problems" as marriage and family researcher Dr. John Gottman likes to call it). I'm simply glad that people are asking these kinds of relationship questions. After all, who you choose to marry is going to have a greater impact on the quality of your life and your long term happiness than just about anything else. And it's also true that everyone is a mixed bag, with aspects to them that are both delightful and frustrating as all get out. So how do you determine what is a relationship red flag, or sign that you're fundamentally incompatible? How to you figure out what differences are okay? When do opposites not just attract, but actually strengthen a partnership? When can you have big differences, and yet still be highly compatible soul mates? The answers might surprise you! On today's episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm going to talk through all these questions with you. To do this though, I need to wear three hats. Relationship Compatibility in Marriage First, I'm going to put on my marriage counselor cape hat and talk about the most common culprits that make married couples wonder if they are compatible or not. Listen and learn what (frustrating!) differences might actually be strengths for your relationship, and what differences are harder to overcome. I'll also give you tips for how to build bridges to the center, and appreciate each other for who you are. Want to see an example of this in action? Check out my recent post: "How Jenny and Greg Fixed Their Relationship."  Finding Your Soulmate Next I'm putting on my dating coach  wizard hat to talk about the serious business of finding your soul mate. Dating is all about "auditioning" people and getting to know them over time. I'll share the down low on the biggest mistake I see dating people make, and how it can impair their ability to find a true soul mate. If you are on the dating market, I'll help you understand what's important to look for in a potential partner, and what is NOT as important when you're looking for love. I'm also sharing some practical steps you can take to make sure that you're finding a good match in terms of both character and chemistry. For Premarital Couples Lastly, I'm sharing my advice as a premarital counselor. If you're planning a wedding with some lingering questions on your mind, you'll want to check out the case example I shared about what it looks like when someone is NOT asking the right questions leading up to marriage. The best time to prevent potential pitfalls is before the wedding. It's essential to have serious conversations about your personalities, hopes and dreams, and expectations prior to the "I Do's." Why? First of all, it's enormously helpful to get on the same page and identify potential problems before you're married. But an even bigger reason? Because the one of the most serious red flags for a relationship is not being able to talk through important things respectfully. If you are literally not able to have "Who are we, what do we each want, and how are we going to get on the same page?" conversations together, you might want to slow down. Relationship Compatibility Test One of the resources I talked through on the show is Dr. Helen Fisher's personality test. If you would like to take it for yourself (and / or ask your partner to) you can find it here: http://bit.ly/2cOmEX6. For more information about the ideas behind Dr. Fisher's compatibility quiz and how they impact people in relationships, I highly recommend her book, "Why Him, Why Her." With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby www.growingself.com

Am I in the "right" relationship? How do I find my soulmate? Are we truly compatible? Many people show up for <a href="http://www.growingself.com/denver-life-coach/denver-dating-coach/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">dating coaching</a>, <a href="http://www.growingself.com/online-life-coach/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">life coaching</a> or even <a href="http://www.growingself.com/marriage-counseling-denver/expert-denver-marriage-counseling/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">marriage counseling</a> with a lot of angst around these unanswered questions. People who are dating can wonder if they've found "the one." <a href="http://www.growingself.com/marriage-counseling-denver/denver-premarital-counseling/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Premarital couples</a> sometimes worry whether they're compatible enough to get married. And even married or long time partnered people can wonder if their relationship issues are due to their being too different. (Or having <a href="https://www.gottman.com/blog/managing-conflict-solvable-vs-perpetual-problems/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">"perpetual problems" as marriage and family researcher Dr. John Gottman likes to call it</a>). I'm simply glad that people are asking these kinds of relationship questions. After all, who you choose to marry is going to have a greater impact on the quality of your life and your long term happiness than just about anything else. And it's also true that everyone is a mixed bag, with aspects to them that are both delightful and frustrating as all get out. So how do you determine what is a relationship red flag, or sign that you're fundamentally incompatible? How to you figure out what differences are okay? When do opposites not just attract, but actually strengthen a partnership? When can you have big differences, and yet still be highly compatible soul mates? The answers might surprise you! On today's episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm going to talk through all these questions with you. To do this though, I need to wear three hats. Relationship Compatibility in Marriage First, I'm going to put on my marriage counselor cape hat and talk about the most common culprits that make married couples wonder if they are compatible or not. Listen and learn what (frustrating!) differences might actually be strengths for your relationship, and what differences are harder to overcome. I'll also give you tips for how to build bridges to the center, and appreciate each other for who you are. Want to see an example of this in action? Check out my recent post: <a href="http://www.growingself.com/how-to-fix-your-relationship-denver-marriage-counselor-online/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">"How Jenny and Greg Fixed Their Relationship." </a> Finding Your Soulmate Next I'm putting on my dating coach  wizard hat to talk about the serious business of finding your soul mate. Dating is all about "auditioning" people and getting to know them over time. I'll share the down low on the biggest mistake I see dating people make, and how it can impair their ability to find a true soul mate. If you are on the dating market, I'll help you understand what's important to look for in a potential partner, and what is NOT as important when you're looking for love. I'm also sharing some practical steps you can take to make sure that you're finding a good match in terms of both character and chemistry. For Premarital Couples Lastly, I'm sharing my advice as a <a href="http://www.growingself.com/marriage-counseling-denver/denver-premarital-counseling/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">premarital counselor</a>. If you're planning a wedding with some lingering questions on your mind, you'll want to check out the case example I shared about what it looks like when someone is NOT asking the right questions leading up to marriage. The best time to prevent potential pitfalls is before the wedding. It's essential to have serious conversations about your personalities, hopes and dreams, and expectations prior to the "I Do's." Why? First of all, <a href="http://www.growingself.com/marriage-counseling-denver/denver-premarital-counseling/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">it's enormously helpful to get on the same page and identify potential problems before you're married</a>. But an even bigger reason? Because the one of the most serious red flags for a relationship is not being able to talk through important things respectfully. If you are literally not able to have "Who are we, what do we each want, and how are we going to get on the same page?" conversations together, you might want to slow down. Relationship Compatibility Test One of the resources I talked through on the show is <a href="http://bit.ly/2cOmEX6" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Dr. Helen Fisher's personality test</a>. If you would like to take it for yourself (and / or ask your partner to) you can find it here: <a href="http://bit.ly/2cOmEX6" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">http://bit.ly/2cOmEX6</a>. For more information about the ideas behind Dr. Fisher's compatibility quiz and how they impact people in relationships, I highly recommend her book, "<a href="https://www.amazon.com/Why-Him-Her-Find-Lasting/dp/0805091521" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Why Him, Why Her.</a>" With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby <a href="http://www.growingself.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">www.growingself.com</a>

Relationship Compatibility: Finding Your Soulmate

Feeling kind of "meh" lately? Feeling unmotivated and kind of negative about everything? You're not alone. As winter drags on (and on) it's the most normal thing in the world to be feeling kind of blah... and even for the dark tendrils of depression to snake their way around you.  Help is here! On today's episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast we're talking about natural remedies for depression. If you're like lots of people, you're hopeful that there could be natural or home remedies that can help you fight back against depression. And you're right. While sometimes therapy and medication are necessary to recover from Major Depressive Disorder, there are also fast, cheap, and relatively easy things that you can start doing today to start recovering from depression (and protect yourself from having it come back in the future).  Natural Remedies For Depression: Listen Now!

Feeling kind of "meh" lately? Feeling unmotivated and kind of negative about everything? You're not alone. As winter drags on (and on) it's the most normal thing in the world to be feeling kind of blah... and even for the dark tendrils of depression to snake their way around you.  Help is here! On today's episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast we're talking about natural remedies for depression. If you're like lots of people, you're hopeful that there could be natural or home remedies that can help you fight back against depression. And you're right. While sometimes therapy and medication are necessary to recover from Major Depressive Disorder, there are also fast, cheap, and relatively easy things that you can start doing today to start recovering from depression (and protect yourself from having it come back in the future).  Natural Remedies For Depression: Listen Now!

Natural Remedies For Depression

SO many of our therapy or life coaching clients come to us with one core wish: To be happy. No matter what their current concerns, obstacles, or challenges, the hope of happiness is always the shining star that pulls them forward into life coaching. But sometimes it can be hard to know what being happy actually means. Truthfully, "happiness" means different things to different people.  Learning about other people who have followed their heartfelt values into genuinely happy lives can inspire us to do the same. The stories of others can light a lamp on our own path, and our own possibilities. Even if your values may be different, knowing that other people have taken bold action to create a meaning and joy can light a spark of inspiration for you to do some deep reflecting on what makes you happy -- and how you might take action to make big changes too.  On this edition of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm talking to a couple of Nomadic Souls who have discovered that for them, happiness is very much a journey rather than a destination. Listen to my interview with full-time travelers Kimberly Travaglino (Founder of Full-time Families) and Clementine Bakstein about how they and their families found happiness, meaning, and connection by following their values down the never-ending road.  All the best, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby www.growingself.com

SO many of our therapy or life coaching clients come to us with one core wish: To be happy. No matter what their current concerns, obstacles, or challenges, the hope of happiness is always the shining star that pulls them forward into life coaching. But sometimes it can be hard to know what being happy actually means. Truthfully, "happiness" means different things to different people.  Learning about other people who have followed their heartfelt values into genuinely happy lives can inspire us to do the same. The stories of others can light a lamp on our own path, and our own possibilities. Even if your values may be different, knowing that other people have taken bold action to create a meaning and joy can light a spark of inspiration for you to do some deep reflecting on what makes you happy -- and how you might take action to make big changes too.  On this edition of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm talking to a couple of Nomadic Souls who have discovered that for them, happiness is very much a journey rather than a destination. Listen to my interview with full-time travelers Kimberly Travaglino (Founder of Full-time Families) and Clementine Bakstein about how they and their families found happiness, meaning, and connection by following their values down the never-ending road.  All the best, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby <a href="http://www.growingself.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">www.growingself.com</a>

The Pursuit of Happiness: Nomadic Souls

On today's episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'll teach you a sequence of three simple steps that will help you fight Depression and lift your mood. If you've been feeling down, stressed or worried lately this podcast will help you shift your perspective, and start feeling better fast. But even if you are in a good place today I hope you still listen. Learning these key skills – particularly when you're already feeling solid – will help you stay even keeled no matter what life throws at you. 

On today's episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'll teach you a sequence of three simple steps that will help you fight Depression and lift your mood. If you've been feeling down, stressed or worried lately this podcast will help you shift your perspective, and start feeling better fast. But even if you are in a good place today I hope you still listen. Learning these key skills – particularly when you're already feeling solid – will help you stay even keeled no matter what life throws at you.

Conquer Depression in Three Simple Steps

Has Your Breakup or Divorce Shattered Your Self Esteem? I have spent years helping broken hearted people with divorce and break-up recovery counseling and coaching, and poured through oceans of research to write my book,  "Exaholics: Breaking your addiction to an Ex Love." I've spent years helping my  private clients heal their self esteem in the aftermath of a bad breakup, and now we're addressing it today on this episode of the  Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. On today's show I'm going to help you understand how your self esteem was damaged, and how to develop new compassion and empathy for yourself. We're also going to discuss the five steps to healing your self esteem after a break up, so that you can start putting yourself back together again. I hope that this helps support you on your journey of growth and healing. xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby www.GrowingSelf.com

Has Your Breakup or Divorce Shattered Your Self Esteem? I have spent years helping broken hearted people with <a href="http://www.breakup-recovery.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">divorce and break-up recovery counseling and coaching</a>, and poured through oceans of research to write my book, <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Exaholics-Breaking-Your-Addiction-Love/dp/145491825X" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> "Exaholics: Breaking your addiction to an Ex Love."</a> I've spent years helping my <a href="https://www.growingself.com/denver-therapy-2/heal-a-broken-heart/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> private clients heal their self esteem in the aftermath of a bad breakup</a>, and now we're addressing it today on this episode of the <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/love-happiness-success-podcast-dr-lisa-marie-bobby/id858864457?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Love, Happiness and Success Podcast.</a> On today's show I'm going to help you understand how your self esteem was damaged, and how to develop new compassion and empathy for yourself. We're also going to discuss the five steps to healing your self esteem after a break up, so that you can start putting yourself back together again. I hope that this helps support you on your journey of growth and healing. xoxo, <a href="https://www.growingself.com/denver-marriage-counselors-life-coaches-therapists/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby</a> <a href="https://www.growingself.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">www.G</a><a href="https://www.growingself.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">rowingSelf.com</a>

Repair Your Self Esteem After a Breakup

It's Time to Grow.  Many people think that the most natural time to make big changes to their lives is around the New Year. Many people flock to  life coaching around then, to help them actualize their resolutions. But, as a life coach, I'm going to let you in on a little-known secret: While the turn of the year is certainly a poetic time for transitions, there's actually one that's more powerful and effective if you really want to make change in your life. And that time is now. Why? Think about it: For all of your formative years, your life had a natural rhythm built around the school year. Summer was a time of self discovery and expansion. You got to step out of the daily grind for a little while, have new experiences, focus on relationships, and generally relax. Then as every new school year began, you had a new opportunity, and a new beginning. Your clothing and school supplies were freshened. Plans were made. Intentions were set. And you got clean slate on which to reinvent yourself, define your new identity, and create a different reality with each passing year. And most years, you succeeded, didn't you? You moved forward. You grew and changed. You were able to manifest a new incarnation of yourself. Every year was a chapter in the ever-evolving story of you. This cycle was repeated over and over and over from the time you were a small child, until well into your twenties and beyond. Our work and vacation seasons still follow this natural order. If you're a parent, you're reliving something similar with your children now. This natural cycle of growth and regeneration is now pretty much hard-wired into your system -- even if you're not in school anymore. However, many adults are no longer consciously aware of the ebb and flow of this seasonal growth energy in their lives. They just move from season to season without thinking too much about it. Sadly, they miss the opportunity for reflection transformation that this time of year affords. But today I'm here to help you learn how to through fully and intentionally harness the power of this special time, and take advantage of it. By deliberately using the psychological and emotional forces that become available to you during this unique time of year, you can make important and lasting change in your life. On this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'll be walking you through some new ideas and activities that will help you give your entire life a makeover. To start, you'll learn how to begin the process of shedding the old, and embracing the new. We'll cover how to de-clutter and re-organize your relationships, your habits, the way you're managing your time, your energy, and yourself. You'll learn how to take stock of different areas of your life to figure out what's working for you, what's worth building on, and what it's time to release. I'll give you some strategies to help you reflect and gain self awareness around the thoughts, feelings and behaviors that need to be released. Then we'll talk about how to craft a plan for this chapter of your life, that includes setting the goals and making the daily changes that will help you create the life you want. You deserve all the love, happiness and success in the world, and I sincerely hope that these ideas help you create it. xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby www.growingself.com

It's Time to Grow.  Many people think that the most natural time to make big changes to their lives is around the New Year. Many people flock to <a href="https://www.growingself.com/denver-life-coach/denver-life-coaching/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> life coaching</a> around then, to help them actualize their resolutions. But, as a life coach, I'm going to let you in on a little-known secret: While the turn of the year is certainly a poetic time for transitions, there's actually one that's more powerful and effective if you really want to make change in your life. And that time is now. Why? Think about it: For all of your formative years, your life had a natural rhythm built around the school year. Summer was a time of self discovery and expansion. You got to step out of the daily grind for a little while, have new experiences, focus on relationships, and generally relax. Then as every new school year began, you had a new opportunity, and a new beginning. Your clothing and school supplies were freshened. Plans were made. Intentions were set. And you got clean slate on which to reinvent yourself, define your new identity, and create a different reality with each passing year. And most years, you succeeded, didn't you? You moved forward. You grew and changed. You were able to manifest a new incarnation of yourself. Every year was a chapter in the ever-evolving story of you. This cycle was repeated over and over and over from the time you were a small child, until well into your twenties and beyond. Our work and vacation seasons still follow this natural order. If you're a parent, you're reliving something similar with your children now. This natural cycle of growth and regeneration is now pretty much hard-wired into your system -- even if you're not in school anymore. However, many adults are no longer consciously aware of the ebb and flow of this seasonal growth energy in their lives. They just move from season to season without thinking too much about it. Sadly, they miss the opportunity for reflection transformation that this time of year affords. But today I'm here to help you learn how to through fully and intentionally harness the power of this special time, and take advantage of it. By deliberately using the psychological and emotional forces that become available to you during this unique time of year, you can make important and lasting change in your life. On this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'll be walking you through some new ideas and activities that will help you give your entire life a makeover. To start, you'll learn how to begin the process of shedding the old, and embracing the new. We'll cover how to de-clutter and re-organize your relationships, your habits, the way you're managing your time, your energy, and yourself. You'll learn how to take stock of different areas of your life to figure out what's working for you, what's worth building on, and what it's time to release. I'll give you some strategies to help you reflect and gain self awareness around the <a href="https://www.growingself.com/love-your-life-the-happiness-class/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">thoughts, feelings and behaviors that need to be released.</a> Then we'll talk about how to craft a plan for this chapter of your life, that includes setting the goals and making the daily changes that will help you create the life you want. You deserve all the love, happiness and success in the world, and I sincerely hope that these ideas help you create it. xoxo, <a href="https://www.growingself.com/denver-marriage-counselors-life-coaches-therapists/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby</a> <a href="http://www.growingself.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">www.growingself.com</a>

Give Your Life a Makeover

Is Your Relationship Just... Off? Have you been feeling worried about your relationship? Are you feeling resentful, or angry with your partner? Are you feeling hurt, or shut out? Do you feel like the person who should be your number one fan has recently turned into a source of pain and frustration? If so, you're not alone. All couples go through ups and downs, and drifting apart (and then coming back together again) is what it means to be in a long term relationship. But it still feels yucky when it's happening. And if disconnection and negativity has been going on for awhile, it can begin to make you feel worried that there may be more serious problems under the surface. Furthermore, it's hard to know how to reconnect when negativity has taken hold of your relationship. Every time you try to reach out and patch things up, it seems like a new hurt or disappointment is always bubbling up to the surface. It's enough to make you start to feel helpless. I'm here to help, and give you advice for how to get back on track with each other. And listen -- I don't want to scare you -- but the time to act is now. January is the most common time of year for breakups and divorces. People can grit their teeth and endure things to "get through the holidays" and then fueled by hopeful resolutions for a happier new year sweep a relationship out right along with the tinsel lint and brown pine needles. My very first piece of advice? If you're really worried about your relationship, pay attention to your intuition. Do things now to help show your partner that it can get better. Your putting effort and energy into your relationship NOW gives you the opportunity to turn things around before one of you starts to lose hope. Let's Talk About How To Fix Your Relationship On today's episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, I'm putting on my Marriage Counselor hat, and will be giving you some advice that will help you figure out whether this "rough patch" is an indication of something serious (or not) and what you can do to get things back on track. We're discussing the most common types of relationship disconnections, and some actionable advice that you can use in each situation to begin establishing open lines of communication, repairing hurt feelings, and solving problems together. I'll also be following up over the next few weeks with two "Communication 101" guides that will help you handle a partner who tends to withdraw and avoid talking about things, plus a tutorial on what to do with a partner who seems angry or critical. Don't miss them: Sign up for the Love, Happiness and Success Express to get a round-up from the blog once a month! Sign up at www.growingself.com What To Do When You're Worried About Your Relationship: Listen Now Next week: Unconditional love -- what it means, and how to cultivate it in your life.

Is Your Relationship Just... Off? Have you been feeling worried about your relationship? Are you feeling resentful, or angry with your partner? Are you feeling hurt, or shut out? Do you feel like the person who should be your number one fan has recently turned into a source of pain and frustration? If so, you're not alone. All couples go through ups and downs, and drifting apart (and then coming back together again) is what it means to be in a long term relationship. But it still feels yucky when it's happening. And if disconnection and negativity has been going on for awhile, it can begin to make you feel worried that there may be more serious problems under the surface. Furthermore, it's hard to know how to reconnect when negativity has taken hold of your relationship. Every time you try to reach out and patch things up, it seems like a new hurt or disappointment is always bubbling up to the surface. It's enough to make you start to feel helpless. I'm here to help, and give you advice for how to get back on track with each other. And listen -- I don't want to scare you -- but the time to act is now. January is the most common time of year for breakups and divorces. People can grit their teeth and endure things to "get through the holidays" and then fueled by hopeful resolutions for a happier new year sweep a relationship out right along with the tinsel lint and brown pine needles. My very first piece of advice? If you're really worried about your relationship, pay attention to your intuition. Do things now to help show your partner that it can get better. Your putting effort and energy into your relationship NOW gives you the opportunity to turn things around before one of you starts to lose hope. Let's Talk About How To Fix Your Relationship On today's episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, I'm putting on my Marriage Counselor hat, and will be giving you some advice that will help you figure out whether this "rough patch" is an indication of something serious (or not) and what you can do to get things back on track. We're discussing the most common types of relationship disconnections, and some actionable advice that you can use in each situation to begin establishing open lines of communication, repairing hurt feelings, and solving problems together. I'll also be following up over the next few weeks with two "Communication 101" guides that will help you handle a partner who tends to withdraw and avoid talking about things, plus a tutorial on what to do with a partner who seems angry or critical. Don't miss them: Sign up for the Love, Happiness and Success Express to get a round-up from the blog once a month! Sign up at <a href="http://www.growingself.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">www.growingself.com</a> What To Do When You're Worried About Your Relationship: Listen Now Next week: Unconditional love -- what it means, and how to cultivate it in your life.

What To Do When You're Worried About Your Relationship

The best podcast episodes of the most interesting stories and things. From skyping someone while they're in space, to tracking down and meeting a telephone scammer in person, to the story of a Galapagos. These episodes will keep you and all your friends entertained and captivated for hours. Learn something new in every episode! Add episodes you're interested into your queue below!

Best Episodes: Interesting Stories & Things

The best podcast episodes about true crime. For any thrill seeking podcast listeners who just can't get enough of the captivating stories of murderers and criminals. This topic has all the best episodes from many different true crime podcasts.  Add episodes you're interested into your queue below!