Episode 12 - Sheila Heen & Maddy Savage at Nordic Business Forum Helsinki 2018
Nordic Business Forum Audio
In business and in life we all need to sometimes have uncomfortable and challenging discussions. But how should we approach them? During this session, Sheila Heen, bestselling author, and Harvard lecturer talks about the art of having difficult conversations.
Sheila Heen: What Her Work on the Harvard Negotiation Project Taught Her About Conflict, Receiving Feedback & Finding Solutions in Your Life & Leadership
Sheila Heen, a senior lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School, joins Dr. Krish Kandiah to discuss her work in negotiations and conflict management and what leaders can take from her years of experience. When she started at Harvard Law School, Roger Fisher, famous for the Harvard Negotiation Project, took her under his wing and quickly immersed her into the world of negotiations and psychology. Her experience brought her to a vast need in politics, business, charities, and families: how to resolve conflicts. This led to her writing Difficult Conversations, which was named one of the 50 most important books of psychology. Sheila explains to Krish that her work shows that people skills, critical to negotiations, is an essential leadership skill. Whether you need insights on challenges at work or bringing unity at home, Sheila Heen is sure to equip you in this conversation. Visit wvi.org/leadershift to learn more about today’s guest, other episodes and how you and your ministry can partner with World Vision.
Ep.1. Sheila Heen, 2 times NY Times Best Selling Co-Author - Thanks for the Feedback
Welcome to Talent Equals! We are starting our new series with an amazing guest - Sheila Heen, Author of 2 New York Times best sellers "Thanks for the Feedback" and "Difficult Conversations". Sheila is a Lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School and has spent the last twenty years with the Harvard Negotiation Project, developing negotiation theory and practice.Receiving feedback is absolutely essential if we are to truly progress and develop in our careers. As a subject that is of particular interest to me, we focused our conversation on receiving feedback, why sometimes this is difficult and the different kinds of feedback which we can learn from. Subscribe to our YouTube channel and follow us on LinkedIn to keep up to date with all the Fintech and Insurtech news.William LaitinenYoutube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4znfBsKevmb8u7v4WrCg0Q/featuredLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/showcase/talent-equals/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/william-laitinen-93282/Website: https://www.exigeinternational.com/Sheila HeenLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sheila-heen-b8a59a6/Website: https://www.stoneandheen.com/Harvard: https://hls.harvard.edu/faculty/directory/10376/HeenSheila's Recommended ReadsGetting to Yes by Roger Fisher, William L. Ury and Bruce PattonWhere Did You Learn to Behave Like That? by Sarah Hill See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
We know them when we're in them. Or avoiding them. Uncomfortable conversations when it feels like one wrong word -- or even one right word expressed wrongly -- can explode like a hand grenade. But we can avoid the detonation and destruction, Harvard Negotiation Project and Harvard Law School lecturer Sheila Heen explain in unpacking the insights and action items in her books Difficult Conversations and Thanks for the Feedback. The key, she says, is recognizing that in tough conversations we're speaking words but exchanging emotions.
Unleashed Season 2, E 4: Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback with Sheila Heen
Results Unleashed Podcast
Today we are joined by Sheila Heen. Sheila is a Founder of Triad Consulting Group and has been on the Harvard Law School faculty as a Lecturer on Law since 1995. She often works with executive teams, helping them to work through conflict, repair working relationships, and make sound decisions together. Sheila’s clients include Pixar, Hugo Boss and the NBA. She's even provided training for the Obama White House. Sheila has spent more than twenty years with the Harvard Negotiation Project, developing negotiation theory and practice. She specializes in particularly difficult negotiations where emotions run high and relationships become strained. She is co-author of two New York Times bestsellers: Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most, and the recently released Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well. Sheila has appeared on shows as diverse as Oprah and the G. Gordon Liddy show. She has spoken at the Global Leadership Summit, Apple, Google, and Microsoft. She is a graduate of Occidental College in Los Angeles and Harvard Law School. She is schooled in negotiation daily by her three children.
197: How to Be Better at Receiving Feedback with Sheila Heen on The TalentGrow Show with Halelly Azulay [Ep57 Rebroadcast]
The Talent Grow Show: Grow Your Leadership and Communication Skills
Receiving feedback is an important leadership skill that we can all develop, and it’s not just up to managers to give it – it’s something we all can and should do more of (and ask for!) and improve our skills in doing so. In this rebroadcast episode of the TalentGrow show with Halelly Azulay, Sheila Heen, CEO of Triad Consulting and best-selling author of Thanks for the Feedback and Difficult Conversations, shares some of her best insights on the art and science of receiving feedback. She explains what the three different kinds of feedback are (including why we need all three, but different amounts of each at different times), what the three kinds of triggered reactions we can have from feedback are, and the best way to receive vague or negative criticism. She also gives a fantastic (and highly actionable!) tip on how to ask for feedback: she warns of a common pitfall and offers a smarter way of asking that not only makes the other person more comfortable but helps to ensure that the ensuing feedback will be relevant and useful. This is an excellent episode for improving your communications skills as well as your inner-processing and emotional clarity. Listen and please share with others! Shownotes: http://www.talentgrow.com/podcast/episode197 Apple Podcasts: http://apple.co/1NiWyZo Stitcher: http://www.stitcher.com/s?fid=62847&refid=stpr Google Play Music: Google Play Music: https://play.google.com/music/listen#/ps/Ijwlgz7lklnxqnfzjna7gcr65be iHeartRadio Podcasts: http://www.iheart.com/show/263-The-TalentGrow-Show-Gr/ Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/talentgrowshow Spotify: http://spoti.fi/2CpgIk1 TuneIn: http://tun.in/pjuHL Amazon Music: http://bit.ly/TalentGrowShow Download the free guide: 10 Mistakes Leaders Make and How to Avoid Them http://www.talentgrow.com/10mistakes Don't forget to LEAVE A RATING/REVIEW ON APPLE PODCASTS! http://apple.co/1NiWyZo
Build Options Into Your Negotiation with Sheila Heen, Ep #212
Why should you build options into your negotiation? How do different options influence the potential customer towards making a deal? Does it cheapen your service offering? Sheila Heen joins this episode of the Sales Reinvented podcast to share her take on the negotiation process—and why she believes presenting the customer options can be a gamechanger. Sheila Heen has taught negotiation at Harvard Law School for 20+ years. She is the founder and CEO of Triad Consulting. She also co-authored two New York Times bestsellers: Difficult Conversations: How To Discuss What Matters Most and Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well. Take advantage of her years of experience in negotiation and learn from the best—listen now! Outline of This Episode [0:18] Sheila’s Introduction [0:57] What is negotiation? [1:16] Why is negotiation so important? [1:30] Why don’t salespeople like to negotiate? [3:50] Sheila’s negotiation process [7:08] Attributes that make a great sales negotiator [9:43] Tools, tactics, and strategies [11:14] Top 3 negotiation dos and don’ts [15:11] Favorite negotiation story Salespeople don’t want to strain the customer relationship According to Sheila, a negotiation is any interaction you’re having with someone where you’re hoping to influence them—or maybe they influence you. It’s the way decisions get made. The better you are at it the more you learn and the more influence you have. Salespeople struggle with negotiation because it takes their relationship with a customer and strains it. Why? You’re trying to build a relationship with the people you’re going to serve. You’re learning about their challenges and how you can support what they’re trying to accomplish—then it gets handed to procurement. Suddenly, we have disconnected the negotiation from the underlying needs and it becomes ALL about price. It can feel stressful. Even worse—in your discomfort—you can give in to their asks. Every time you give in, you’re teaching them how to negotiate with you. Understand your customer’s sphere of influence Sheila believes you need to understand the client’s challenges. What are they trying to accomplish? What have they tried already? What has or hasn’t worked in the past? Who are they trying to influence internally? What else is on their mind? Who do they have to negotiate with to get a green light on this? Who are the key stakeholders who—if they really buy into what you’re doing—are going to be their biggest advocates? It doesn’t always align with whoever has the official job titles. You must listen to find out who the decision-makers are in their world. You must equip your counterpart to be prepared for the internal negotiations they’ll have with those influencers. Sheila points out that “The success of my negotiation hinges on the success of their negotiations.” Why you NEED to build options into your negotiation Another tip that Sheila shares is that you must listen carefully for the language and vocabulary that your counterpart uses internally. Incorporate everything you’ve learned into your proposal—using their own terminology that’s familiar to them. Secondly, you must create different budget options for them in the proposal. For example: Option A: Accomplishes everything you want to accomplish at a certain price point. Option B: Accomplishes most of what you want to accomplish with more risk, with someone you don’t know, etc. but potentially at a more affordable price. By having a couple of options that test the waters, it actually flushes out they're real interests and constraints. Presenting them with options also gives them an out—if we are going to save some money, what are the tradeoffs? Make it a joint problem for both of you to solve. Perhaps you can’t deliver the same thing for less, but you can work together to deliver as much value as possible for their investment. Negotiating this way helps them feel like they have the autonomy to choose the best fit for them. They always know more about their context and the reactions that they're going to get in their internal conversations than you do. A great sales negotiator is a great listener Sheila emphasizes that the ability to listen is the most important attribute a salesperson can have. She’s recently talked to a vendor about a platform to use for the upcoming school year. The vendor didn’t ask her a SINGLE question. She didn’t ask questions about Sheila’s class, what she was concerned about, or what she needed. Instead, the saleswoman immediately launched into showing her the features of the platform. It didn’t inspire a lot of confidence. Even just five minutes of asking questions about Sheila’s needs and concerns—followed by the same presentation—would have yielded dramatically different results. What a missed opportunity. Sheila shares her favorite tools, tactics, and strategies AND her top 3 negotiation dos and don’ts plus her favorite negotiation story. This episode is packed full of useful information—don’t miss it! Connect with Sheila Heen Triad Consulting Group Follow on Twitter Connect on LinkedIn Connect With Paul Watts LinkedIn Twitter Subscribe to SALES REINVENTED Audio Production and Show notes by PODCAST FAST TRACK https://www.podcastfasttrack.com
S3 | E5: Feedback that Creates Change with Sheila Heen
Diana Kander: Professional AF
Sheila Heen is the Founder of Triad Consulting Group and a Lecturer at Harvard Law School.Besides teaching at Harvard, Sheila has worked with the biggest companies in the world, helping their executive teams work through conflict, repair working relationships, and make sound decisions together.She has also spent the last twenty years with the Harvard Negotiation Project, developing negotiation theory and practice. Sheila specializes in particularly difficult negotiations – where emotions run high and relationships become strained. She's written two very successful books: Difficult Conversationsand the one we're talking about today, Thanks for the Feedback.I really wanted to talk to Sheila because there have been so many books written on how to give feedback to others, but if we're going to learn from our mistakes and get even better at what we're already doing, we must learn how to not only ask for but listen to feedback. Sheila's book is a rare and incredible resource in this regard, and I just had to share it with you.Specifically, Sheila and I discuss:- How to make feedback work in your organization- The problem with coaching and why it doesn't work quite like we hope- The three different kinds of feedback you can give someone- Why the feedback sandwich doesn't work, and how to give critical feedback much better.- How to process the feedback you receive in a way you can actually use. Thanks for listening and be sure to find me online to tell me what you thought of the episode!@DianaKander on Instagram and Twitter Professional AF Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/943925015810362/Diana online: www.DianaKander.com
Confrontation Nation: Expert Tips on Having Difficult Conversations from Sheila Heen EP: 246
How To Be A Better Person with Kate Hanley
Bestselling author of "Difficult Conversations" and 20-year member of the Negotiation Project at Harvard Sheila Heen comes on to share some pointers on how to have these tough talks--including those that involve calling out or calling in racism.
Sheila Heen is an expert on managing difficult negotiations, a lecturer on law at Harvard Law School, and a founder of Triad Consulting. Sheila often partners with executive teams, helping them work through conflict, repair working relationships, and make sound decisions together and her clients include Apple, HSBC, Unilever, and Pixar among others. She is the co-author of the New York Times business bestseller Difficult Conversations: How To Discuss What Matters Most and more recently Thanks For The Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well (Even When It’s Off-Base, Unfair, Poorly Delivered and Frankly, You’re Not in the Mood). In this week’s podcast, we explore why receiving feedback can be so challenging at work, and how we can unhook from our feedback triggers to make the most of the gift we are being given. Connect with Sheila Heen: https://stoneandheen.com/ You’ll Learn: [02:45] - Sheila explains why learning to receive feedback is a skill that we should all be building. [05:29] - Sheila outlines the research findings on how being able to receive feedback impacts people’s performance and wellbeing at work. [07:37] - Sheila shares the three different triggers that can make hearing feedback difficult to hear. [11:26] - Sheila explains the three different types of feedback people are given at work and why it helps to be clear about the purpose of the feedback we’re giving and receiving. [16:07] - Sheila offers tips for us to be present and really hear and make the most of the feedback we’re given. [20:04] - Sheila explores how growth mindsets can help us lean into giving and receiving feedback better. [24:09] - Sheila explains why the ability of leaders to receive feedback well helps to improve psychological safety in teams. [26:33] - Sheila enters for the lightning round. Your Resources: MPPW Podcast on Facebook Group Thanks for listening! Thanks so much for joining me again this week. If you enjoyed this episode, please share it using the social media buttons you see at the bottom of this post. Please leave an honest review of the Making Positive Psychology Work Podcast on iTunes. Ratings and reviews are extremely helpful and greatly appreciated. They do matter in the rankings of the show, and I read each and every one of them. And don’t forget to subscribe to the show on iTunes to get automatic updates. It’s free! You can also listen to all the episodes of Making Positive Psychology Work streamed directly to your smartphone or iPad through stitcher. No need for downloading or syncing. Until next time, take care! Thank you, Sheila!