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5 minute summaries

1 quote, 3 ideas & 1 question from each episode

__________

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Esther Perel – The Erotic Is an Antidote to Death

On Being with Krista Tippett

8 Jul 2021

50mins

FEATURING

Owltail Summaries

1 quote, 3 ideas & 1 question from each episode

_________

Esther Perel – The Erotic Is an Antidote to Death

8 Jul 2021

50mins

Weekly hand curated podcast episodes for learning

Quote

"We're walking contradictions, seeking safety and predictability on one hand and thriving on diversity on the other"

Ideas

1

In many of my therapy sessions, I'm thinking, it's not what they're experiencing but the fact that they're experiencing it completely alone. It's compounded.
It's not that I just wanted to do an exhibitionism with a public therapy session for people to listen into.

It's because I actually think that when you listen deeply to the experiences of others, you stand in front of your own mirror, and you transcend that aloneness.

You connect with others going through the same things, as well as better understand what you yourself are going through.

1

In many of my therapy sessions, I'm thinking, it's not what they're experiencing but the fact that they're experiencing it completely alone. It's compounded.
It's not that I just wanted to do an exhibitionism with a public therapy session for people to listen into.

It's because I actually think that when you listen deeply to the experiences of others, you stand in front of your own mirror, and you transcend that aloneness.

You connect with others going through the same things, as well as better understand what you yourself are going through.

2

Eroticism, narrowed down to the pure sexual meaning, is a real reduction of what the word stands for.
Eroticism is not sex per se, but the qualities of vitality, curiosity, and spontaneity that make us feel alive.

It's a transgressive force that's about breaking the rules, it takes you outside of the borders of reality and the limitations of life.

It blooms from the tension between excitation and inhibition and manifests in the things we say and do, by how we act, and by how we think.

2

Eroticism, narrowed down to the pure sexual meaning, is a real reduction of what the word stands for.
Eroticism is not sex per se, but the qualities of vitality, curiosity, and spontaneity that make us feel alive.

It's a transgressive force that's about breaking the rules, it takes you outside of the borders of reality and the limitations of life.

It blooms from the tension between excitation and inhibition and manifests in the things we say and do, by how we act, and by how we think.

3

It is often during the times we are far outside our elements that we best experience ourselves the most.
We often think about how "I need to first work on myself. I need to first feel good about me or solve me, before I can be with somebody else," but you often discover who you are, in the presence of another.

It's like a constant dance between us and others. What right do I have to do for me when it hurts you? How much can I ask for me and not give to you? How much do I make sure not to lose you but lose me in the process? Or how much do I have to hold onto me but lose you in the process?

That tension between yourself and others is the core of being human, the balance of freedom and responsibility.

3

It is often during the times we are far outside our elements that we best experience ourselves the most.
We often think about how "I need to first work on myself. I need to first feel good about me or solve me, before I can be with somebody else," but you often discover who you are, in the presence of another.

It's like a constant dance between us and others. What right do I have to do for me when it hurts you? How much can I ask for me and not give to you? How much do I make sure not to lose you but lose me in the process? Or how much do I have to hold onto me but lose you in the process?

That tension between yourself and others is the core of being human, the balance of freedom and responsibility.

Questions

1

I turn myself off by... or I turn myself off when...?

1

I turn myself off by... or I turn myself off when...?

What else is in the episode

1

What erotic intelligence means

1

What erotic intelligence means

2

How love and desire both relate and also conflict with each other

2

How love and desire both relate and also conflict with each other

3

The concept of ambiguous loss

3

The concept of ambiguous loss

Who is Esther Perel?

1

A psychotherapist that focuses on relationships. She has a therapy practice in New York City, and hosts Where Should We Begin? which brings listeners inside her therapist's office as well as How's Work? focuses on workplace dynamics. She's the author of multiple best selling books about love, relationships, affairs, eroticism and more.

1

A psychotherapist that focuses on relationships. She has a therapy practice in New York City, and hosts Where Should We Begin? which brings listeners inside her therapist's office as well as How's Work? focuses on workplace dynamics. She's the author of multiple best selling books about love, relationships, affairs, eroticism and more.

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