OwlTail

5 minute summaries

1 quote, 3 ideas & 1 question from each episode

__________

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#254 — The Mating Strategies of Earthlings

Making Sense with Sam Harris

25 Jun 2021

49mins

Owltail Summaries

1 quote, 3 ideas & 1 question from each episode

_________

#254 — The Mating Strategies of Earthlings

25 Jun 2021

49mins

Weekly hand curated podcast episodes for learning

Quote

"Treating different things the same can generate as much inequality as treating the same things differently."

Ideas

1

Being attracted to other women doesn't mean you're not in love with your wife.
Being sexually attracted to someone of the opposite is a biological effect. You can have this but still be in love with your wife.

But just because it's natural doesn't mean it's necessarily a good thing and just because it's natural doesn't mean there isn't anything we can do about it.

We have a lot of different evolved psychological adaptations, and in any one moment, only some of those are activated, and we can often try to choose which ones we want to activate.

1

Being attracted to other women doesn't mean you're not in love with your wife.
Being sexually attracted to someone of the opposite is a biological effect. You can have this but still be in love with your wife.

But just because it's natural doesn't mean it's necessarily a good thing and just because it's natural doesn't mean there isn't anything we can do about it.

We have a lot of different evolved psychological adaptations, and in any one moment, only some of those are activated, and we can often try to choose which ones we want to activate.

2

Men and women have different optimal sexual strategies because of evolution.
From an evolutionary point of view, any traits that increase the chances of increasing offspring will usually spread throughout the population over time.

For offspring, women have to invest significant time in pregnancy and nursing, and ultimately can have limited pregnancies.

Whilst men are able to reproduce simply by having sex, and are not limited by pregnancy.

Therefore, having a lot of opportunities for sex is a stronger evolutionary advantage for men in comparison to women.

And as a result, one of the largest documented sex differences is that men tend to have a much greater desire for a variety of sex partners in comparison to women.

2

Men and women have different optimal sexual strategies because of evolution.
From an evolutionary point of view, any traits that increase the chances of increasing offspring will usually spread throughout the population over time.

For offspring, women have to invest significant time in pregnancy and nursing, and ultimately can have limited pregnancies.

Whilst men are able to reproduce simply by having sex, and are not limited by pregnancy.

Therefore, having a lot of opportunities for sex is a stronger evolutionary advantage for men in comparison to women.

And as a result, one of the largest documented sex differences is that men tend to have a much greater desire for a variety of sex partners in comparison to women.

3

Women often have affairs when they're unhappy with their marriage, whilst men often have affairs irrespective of this.
On average, womens affairs are often more deeply emotional and result in love with their affair partners, whilst for men, it's more about desire for sexual variety with much less of a deep emotional connection.

So when affairs occur, it is more likely that women are looking for another long term partner, whilst men are more likely to simply fulfill their sexual desires.

3

Women often have affairs when they're unhappy with their marriage, whilst men often have affairs irrespective of this.
On average, womens affairs are often more deeply emotional and result in love with their affair partners, whilst for men, it's more about desire for sexual variety with much less of a deep emotional connection.

So when affairs occur, it is more likely that women are looking for another long term partner, whilst men are more likely to simply fulfill their sexual desires.

Questions

1

Can you think of something that is natural but isn't something you think is right?

1

Can you think of something that is natural but isn't something you think is right?

What else is in the episode

1

Sex differences in jealousy

1

Sex differences in jealousy

2

What we can learn from dating apps

2

What we can learn from dating apps

3

Why are we often drawn to partners with "dark" personality traits, such as narcissism

3

Why are we often drawn to partners with "dark" personality traits, such as narcissism

Who is David Buss?

1

An evolutionary psychologist at the University of Texas at Austin, theorizing and researching human sex differences in mate selection. His recent research focuses on the dark side of human nature, including conflict between the sexes, jealousy, stalking, intimate partner violence, and murder. He is the author of several books including Why Men Behave Badly, The Evolution of Desire: Strategies of Human Mating and more.

1

An evolutionary psychologist at the University of Texas at Austin, theorizing and researching human sex differences in mate selection. His recent research focuses on the dark side of human nature, including conflict between the sexes, jealousy, stalking, intimate partner violence, and murder. He is the author of several books including Why Men Behave Badly, The Evolution of Desire: Strategies of Human Mating and more.

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