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Rank #6 in Management category

Business
Education
Careers
Management

Coaching for Leaders

Updated 5 days ago

Rank #6 in Management category

Business
Education
Careers
Management
Read more

Leaders aren’t born, they’re made. This Monday show helps you discover leadership wisdom through insightful conversations. Independently produced weekly since 2011, Dr. Dave Stachowiak brings perspective from a thriving, global leadership academy of managers, executives, and business owners, plus more than 15 years of leadership at Dale Carnegie. New York Times bestselling authors, expert researchers, deep conversation, and regular dialogue with listeners has attracted over 10 million downloads. In addition, one Saturday episode a month features a listener success story. Activate your FREE membership to search the entire episode library by topic at CoachingforLeaders.com

Read more

Leaders aren’t born, they’re made. This Monday show helps you discover leadership wisdom through insightful conversations. Independently produced weekly since 2011, Dr. Dave Stachowiak brings perspective from a thriving, global leadership academy of managers, executives, and business owners, plus more than 15 years of leadership at Dale Carnegie. New York Times bestselling authors, expert researchers, deep conversation, and regular dialogue with listeners has attracted over 10 million downloads. In addition, one Saturday episode a month features a listener success story. Activate your FREE membership to search the entire episode library by topic at CoachingforLeaders.com

iTunes Ratings

635 Ratings
Average Ratings
563
35
15
14
8

My favorite podcast

By Florocco - Oct 16 2019
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I can't get enough of Dave! Great guests and such a great interview style. He's kind and able to drill down, what a combo! Thanks Dave

Outstanding!

By Educator Todd - Feb 20 2019
Read more
I have been listening for just over a year and find value (big and small) in every episode

iTunes Ratings

635 Ratings
Average Ratings
563
35
15
14
8

My favorite podcast

By Florocco - Oct 16 2019
Read more
I can't get enough of Dave! Great guests and such a great interview style. He's kind and able to drill down, what a combo! Thanks Dave

Outstanding!

By Educator Todd - Feb 20 2019
Read more
I have been listening for just over a year and find value (big and small) in every episode
Cover image of Coaching for Leaders

Coaching for Leaders

Updated 5 days ago

Read more

Leaders aren’t born, they’re made. This Monday show helps you discover leadership wisdom through insightful conversations. Independently produced weekly since 2011, Dr. Dave Stachowiak brings perspective from a thriving, global leadership academy of managers, executives, and business owners, plus more than 15 years of leadership at Dale Carnegie. New York Times bestselling authors, expert researchers, deep conversation, and regular dialogue with listeners has attracted over 10 million downloads. In addition, one Saturday episode a month features a listener success story. Activate your FREE membership to search the entire episode library by topic at CoachingforLeaders.com

Rank #1: 192: How to Create Team Guidelines, with Susan Gerke

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Susan Gerke: Go Team Resources
Susan was last appeared on three prior shows:

21: Your Strengths and Blind Spots
138: The Four Unique Types of Teams
139: How To Maximize Team Performance

You can discover more about Susan and her training materials at Go Team Resources.

On a true team, the work is all integrated.

Don’t create guidelines yourself and give them to the team.

A starting point for how to create team guidelines is what did not work well on a previous team.

“The dialogue that happens while team guidelines are being created is almost the highest value thing that happens.” -Susan Gerke

It’s important to have everyone present at a team meeting.

Creating operating guidelines is really foundational work for a team.

If you don’t do these kinds of things for your team, where do you go when you’re struggling?

How to keep it visible:

Don’t go past 8 guidelines for a team
Have a team rate themselves on each item immediately
Assess the same number a regular meetings (monthly and then quarterly)
Make changes along the way, but use a structured process
Disagreement is the sign of a healthy team

We also mentioned Susan’s business partner David Hutchens, who appeared on episode 148: The Four Stories Leaders Need For Influence
Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

May 11 2015

39mins

Play

Rank #2: 306: Five Steps to Hold People Accountable, with Jonathan Raymond

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Jonathan Raymond: Good Authority
Jonathan Raymond is the founder of Refound, a firm that believes we should all be aiming for more Yoda and less Superman. He is the author of the book, Good Authority: How to Become the Leader Your Team Is Waiting For*.

Many managers and leaders recognize when more accountability is needed, but few use a process that invites high performance and embraces the whole person. In his work at Refound, Jonathan invites leaders to imagine a world where personal and professional growth are one thing, and where improving your relationships and owning your strengths translate directly into the rest of your life.

In this conversation, Jonathan teaches us a common language around accountability that works for almost everyone. Plus, he teaches us the five key steps of the accountability dial.
Key Points

Micromanagement is focused on tasks, but accountability is focused on relationships.
Accountability doesn’t work unless there’s a context of personal caring.
Employees want growth, and growth comes from productive discomfort. If you if you orient your day towards acknowledgment only on the positive side, you’re missing the better part of it.

The 5 Steps of the Accountability Dial:

The Mention
The Invitation
The Conversation
The Boundary
The Limit

Resources Mentioned

Good Authority: How to Become the Leader Your Team Is Waiting For* by Jonathan Raymond
Download the Accountability Dial
Refound (Jonathan's Firm)

Book Notes
Download my highlights from Good Authority in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

How to Create Team Guidelines, with Susan Gerke (episode 192)
New Management Practices of Leading Organizations, with David Burkus (episode 253)
Moving Beyond Command and Control, with Brian Robertson (episode 258)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

Jul 17 2017

43mins

Play

Rank #3: 337: Six Tactics for Extraordinary Performance, with Morten Hansen

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Morten Hansen: Great at Work
Morten Hansen is a management professor at University of California, Berkeley. He is the coauthor with Jim Collins of the New York Times bestseller Great by Choice and the author of the new book Great at Work: How Top Performers Do Less, Work Better, and Achieve More*.
Key Points
The Six Tactics:

Carve out the 15
Chunk it
Measure the soft
Get feedback
Dig the dip
Confront the stall point

Other Points:

Focus on one skill you want to prove.
Meetings should only be for debate, not status updates.
Having a coach is great, but often you can coach yourself if you only focus on one thing at a time.

Resources Mentioned

Great at Work* by Morten Hansen
Great by Choice* by Jim Collins and Morten T. Hansen

Book Notes
Download my highlights from Great at Work in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

CFL31: Five Effective Ways to Train the People You Lead (episode 31)
CFL157: Why It’s Essential To Struggle With Learning (episode 157)
CFL181: Create the Best Place to Work, with Ron Friedman (episode 181)
CFL273: Essentials of Adult Development, with Mindy Danna (episode 273)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

Feb 19 2018

38mins

Play

Rank #4: 271: How to Increase Your Conversational Intelligence, with Judith Glaser

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Judith Glaser: Conversational Intelligence
Judith Glaser is an Organizational Anthropologist. She is one of the most pioneering and innovative change agents, consultants, and executive coaches, in the consulting industry and is the world’s leading authority on Conversational Intelligence, Neuro-innovation, and WE-centric Leadership. She is a best-selling author of seven business books including her newest best seller Conversational Intelligence: How Great Leaders Build Trust and Get Extraordinary Results.
Key Points

Great conversation leads to great relationships, which leads to great culture.
Level I conversations are about resistance
Level II conversations are about “wait and see“
Level III conversations are about co-creation
When we are threatened by others, cortisol can linger for 26 hours.
Children have the same capacity for conversational intelligence that adults do, but only if we have the courage to nurture their growth.

Resources Mentioned

Conversational Intelligence by Judith Glaser
Conversational Intelligence website

Activate Your Free Coaching for Leaders Membership
Get immediate access to my free, 10-day audio course, 10 Ways to Empower the People You Lead. Give me 10 minutes a day for 10 days to get the most immediate, practical actions to become a better leader. Join at CoachingforLeaders.com.
Related Episodes

CFL91: How to Listen When Someone is Venting
CFL161: How To Address Difficult Conversations
CFL177: How to Start a Conversation With Anyone

Next Episode
Murial Maignan Wilkins appears to help us discover how to improve our executive presence. She’s the co-author of the book Own the Room: Discover Your Signature Voice to Master Your Leadership Presence.
Thank You
Submit your question for consideration on the next question and answer show the first Monday of every month at http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback

Nov 14 2016

37mins

Play

Rank #5: 433: How to Start Managing Up, with Tom Henschel

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Tom Henschel: The Look & Sound of Leadership

Tom Henschel of Essential Communications grooms senior leaders and executive teams. An internationally recognized expert in the field of workplace communications and self-presentation, he has helped thousands of leaders achieve excellence through his work as an executive coach and his top-rated podcast, The Look & Sound of Leadership.

Recently, I’ve received a number of questions about “managing up” and “coaching up.” In this conversation, Tom and I discuss the art and practice of managing up, how it is different than coaching up, and where to focus your mindset and time for the best results to influence effectively.

Key Points

  • Managing up happens when you want to influence how you’re perceived by your manager. Coaching up happens when you want to create change in the relationship with your manager.
  • A useful phrase to start with when speaking truth to power: “I think differently about that…”
  • Set aside the emotion when addressing a business issues and lead with data and evidence.
  • “Appeal to the nobler motives.” -Dale Carnegie
  • Come to the table with solutions — or at least a first step. Most people know this rule, but far fewer do it consistently.
  • Ask yourself: how is my boss being measured for success?
  • A cardinal rule when managing up: take more off your boss’s plate that you add to it.

Bonus Audio

Resources Mentioned

Related Episodes

Discover More

Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

Sep 30 2019

38mins

Play

Rank #6: 146: Three Things To Stop Doing In Leadership

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Perspective from Steve Richardson, author of Become a Better Leader in 30 Days*, on what to stop doing in leadership.
Guest: Steve Richardson
Author, Become A Better Leader in 30 Days*

“All leaders manage, but not all managers lead.” -Steve Richardson

Three things not to do when managing people

Avoid managing by suggestion

Managers do this when they don’t want to be accountable
What do people really want from leaders?

Direct
Decisive
Avoid managing by hoping

These managers maintain a positive attitude, but don’t really know how things are going
Employees learn that managers like this want to hear only good news
Avoid managing by redoing

Some managers take on the work of employees and will re-do it
This is trap for people who were the start performers in the previous role
We mentioned episode #117: The Seven Steps You Follow To Delegate Work
“Doing something well myself is different than doing something well through other people.” -Steve Richardson

Ask: How can I help you?

The response “fine” does not necessarily mean fine
Ask the next question to find out what’s really going on

Steve's triangle of managing people: Fair, Friendly, and Firm

One of these will typically take the lead in one situation
What does this person most need right now?
It takes tension to keep them in balance
Let intuition govern what takes the lead in any given situation

What should you stop doing?

Feedback

On this topic: http://coachingforleaders.com/146
Comments, questions, or feedback: http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback
(949) 38-LEARN

Please take five minutes to complete the listener survey

Thank you to weekly update subscribers Tracey Tillott-Gray, Sal Vilardo, Christine Quackenboss, Olga Correia, Tammy Ostroski, Jeff Putsch, Sharen Kreitsch, Whitney Jacobs, Christopher Naidoo, Jo Goeppner, Yosbel Lecha, and Kelvina Burrell. You can subscribe as well at http://coachingforleaders.com/subscribe

Jun 23 2014

Play

Rank #7: 223: Start With Why, with Simon Sinek

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Simon Sinek: Start with Why* and Leaders Eat Last*
Questions from Mastermind members:

How do you make these ideas part of the operating culture of the organization? —Mike
I have listened to Simon's book, Why Leaders Eat Last. Simon provided a lot of examples of what he calls the circle of safety. His philosophy and ideas are rational. Does he have data to support that getting buy in on his philosophy is actually good for business by reducing costs or increasing profits? —Chris

Quotes
Companies should not be deciding their purpose or cause based on market research. That’s like a politician deciding what their vision is based on poll numbers.
—Simon Sinek

The first step to becoming that leader we wish we had is to actually want to be the leader.
—Simon Sinek

It’s about all about purpose and creating strong human relationships, and learning your “Why” gives you a massive advantage in decision-making.
—Simon Sinek

Fulfillment comes through service to others. When we make it about ourselves, it never really works. When we make it about others, it really feels amazing.
—Simon Sinek

If your kid has a bad report card, you don’t put him up for adoption, you get him a tutor. If someone has performance issues at the company, you don’t fire them, you coach them.
—Simon Sinek

Leadership is a process, and it requires commitment.
—Simon Sinek

The only way to find out if it will work is to do it.
—Simon Sinek

Leaders are not responsible for the numbers; leaders are responsible for the people responsible for the numbers.
—Simon Sinek
Resources

Book: Start with Why: How Great Leaders Inspire Everyone to Take Action* by Simon Sinek
Book: Leaders Eat Last* by Simon Sinek
TED talk: How great leaders inspire action

Feedback

Comments, questions, or feedback for future Q&A shows: http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback
The next Q&A show is episode 225

Please join my weekly leadership guide. The leadership guide is delivered to your inbox each Wednesday and includes my thoughts and recommendations on the best articles, podcasts, videos, and books, to support your development between shows.

As a bonus, when you join the weekly leadership guide, you'll get immediate access to my reader's guide listing the 10 Leadership Books that Will Help You Get Better Results From Others with brief summaries from me on the value of each book. Download the 11-page reader's guide and 9-minute video of these book recommendations. Visit http://coachingforleaders.com/subscribe
Thank You
Thank you to Jon Lokhorst for the kind review on iTunes. If you would like to post a review as well, it's a huge help in the growth of the Coaching for Leaders community. If you use iTunes, just visit http://coachingforleaders.com/itunes and thank you in advance for your support!

Dec 14 2015

39mins

Play

Rank #8: 282: How to Motivate People, with Dan Ariely

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Dan Ariely: Payoff
Dan Ariely is the James B. Duke Professor of Psychology and Behavioral Economics at Duke University and a founding member of the Center for Advanced Hindsight. His books include Irrationally Yours, Predictably Irrational, The Upside of Irrationality, The (Honest) Truth About Dishonesty, and his most recent book, Payoff: The Hidden Logic That Shapes Our Motivations.
Key Points

The things that motivate us are about accomplishment and achievement, not day-to-day happiness.
Most people realize that they themselves are not truly motivated by money, but they still assume other people are completely motivated by it.
Figure out a way to pay people that adds to the development of a long-term relationship, not a short-term transactional one.
It is important to find a way to connect people’s jobs to the final outcome of their work, because many people don’t feel connected to their organization’s main purpose.

Resources Mentioned

Payoff: The Hidden Logic That Shapes Our Motivations* by Dan Ariely
Predictably Irrational* by Dan Ariely
Drive* by Daniel Pink
www.danariely.com

Book Notes
Download my highlights from Payoff in PDF format (free membership required).
Activate Your Free Coaching for Leaders Membership
Get immediate access to my free, 10-day audio course, 10 Ways to Empower the People You Lead. Give me 10 minutes a day for 10 days to get the most immediate, practical actions to become a better leader. Join at CoachingforLeaders.com.
Related Episodes

CFL84: Daniel Pink on To Sell is Human
CFL181: Create the Best Place to Work
CFL251: What to Do When Somebody Quits
CFL253: New Management Practices of Leading Organizations
CFL276: Employee Engagement With Management 3.0

Next Episode
Bonni and I return for the monthly question and answer show. Submit your question for consideration next week or for the first question and answer show the first Monday of every month at http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback
Thank You
Thank you to Greg Hall and Chase Batt here in the States and Lynn Wang in Hong Kong for the kind reviews on iTunes. To leave a rating or review, visit http://coachingforleaders.com/itunes

Jan 30 2017

35mins

Play

Rank #9: 358: How to Lead Meetings That Get Results, with Mamie Kanfer Stewart

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Mamie Kanfer Stewart: Momentum
Mamie Kanfer Stewart is the founder and CEO of Meeteor, a global venture providing meeting management solutions. She’s the author along with Tai Tsao of the book Momentum: Creating Effective, Engaging, and Enjoyable Meetings*.
Key Points
Six reasons we have meetings:

Connect
Align
Decide
Ideate/Brainstorm
Plan
Produce

Three kinds of people that are involved in a meeting are people who need to be:

Consulted
Informed
Engaged

Resources Mentioned

Download the first chapter of Momentum
The Modern Manager podcast
Momentum: Creating Effective, Engaging, and Enjoyable Meetings*

Book Notes
Download my highlights from Momentum in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

How to Create Team Guidelines, with Susan Gerke (episode 192)
How to Maximize Standing Meetings and More Questions, with Bonni Stachowiak (episode 212)
The Way to Conduct One-on-Ones, with Zvi Band (episode 246)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

Jun 25 2018

39mins

Play

Rank #10: 190: How to Improve Your Coaching Skills, with Tom Henschel

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Tom Henschel
Host, The Look & Sound of Leadership podcast and Executive Coach, Essential Communications
When it’s a development issue (or a way of thinking) it’s coaching that’s most helpful.

Tom says that coaching needs good goals, or at least one single goal over time.

Think about the goal as if it were on video — how do you want the end result to look?

“Coaching? It’s not about you.” -Tom Henschel

“The coaching process is helping someone understand, from their own point of view, why it would be in their benefit.” -Tom Henschel

Tom shared two stories from his teenage daughter Julia that helps him with coaching.

Food for thought:

Do people see coaching as part of their jobs? Do they have time for it?

To improve your coaching skills:

Let them go first.
Use open ended questions, such as, “What does that sound like to you?”
Earn the right to give advice.

Tom last appeared on these two episodes:

107: Three Steps To Soliciting Feedback with Tom Henschel
164: How to Handle a Boss Who’s a Jerk with Tom Henschel
Feedback

Comments, questions, or feedback for future Q&A shows: http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback
The next Q&A show is episode 191 on the topic of books

Please join my weekly leadership guide. The leadership guide is delivered to your inbox each Wednesday and includes my thoughts and recommendations on the best articles, podcasts, videos, and books, to support your development between shows. It also includes a brief overview and link to the full weekly show notes. If you, like me, tend to listen to podcasts while you’re on the road or exercising, this will give you an easy way to follow-up later on the links and resources we mention in every show.

As a bonus, when you join the weekly leadership guide, you’ll get immediate access to my reader’s guide listing the 10 Leadership Books that Will Help You Get Better Results From Others with brief summaries from me on the value of each book. Download the 11-page reader's guide and 9-minute video of these book recommendations…plus, insight on the 2 books that I rely on weekly! http://coachingforleaders.com/subscribe
Community Member Spotlight
Want to be featured in an upcoming member spotlight? Visit http://coachingforleaders.com/spotlight

Apr 27 2015

45mins

Play

Rank #11: 249: How to Succeed with Leadership and Management, with John Kotter

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John Kotter:
Author of “That’s Not How We Do It Here!”*
On this week’s episode, John shares how to succeed with leadership and management.
Feedback

Comments, questions, or feedback for future question and answer shows: http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback
The next question and answer show is episode 252

If you're not already subscribed to this show, please do so and you’ll get new episodes every Monday. Just search for Coaching for Leaders on iTunes, Stitcher, or any podcast app you use and subscribe there.

Please join my weekly leadership guide. The leadership guide is delivered to your inbox each Wednesday and includes my thoughts and recommendations on the best articles, podcasts, videos, and books to support your development between shows. It also includes a brief overview and link to the full weekly show notes. If you, like me, tend to listen to podcasts while you’re on the road or exercising, this will give you an easy way to follow up later on the links and resources we mention in every show.

As a bonus, when you join the weekly leadership guide, you’ll get immediate access to my reader’s guide listing the 10 leadership books that will help you get better results from others, with brief summaries from me on the value of each book. Download the 11-page reader’s guide and 9-minute video of these book recommendations … plus, insight on the 2 books that I rely on weekly! http://coachingforleaders.com/subscribe
Thank You
Thank you to Teeps22 for the kind review on iTunes. If you would like to post a review as well, it's a huge help in the growth of the Coaching for Leaders community. If you use iTunes, just visit http://coachingforleaders.com/itunes and thank you in advance for your support!

Jun 13 2016

45mins

Play

Rank #12: 208: How to Motivate People and More Questions

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Bonni Stachowiak
Teaching in Higher Ed
Bonni mentioned episode 84: Daniel Pink on To Sell is Human

We also mentioned and recommended the book Drive by Daniel Pink* as a great resource on how to motivate people
Audio Question from Jenga
”The only way to influence someone is to find out what they want and show them how to get it." -Dale Carnegie

Dave mentioned the Carnegie Coach series on “innerviewing:”

Carnegie Coach episode 39: Get To Know People Without Being Awkward
Carnegie Coach episode 40: Just the Facts, Ma’am
Carnegie Coach episode 41: Discovering Another Person’s Motives
Caring Coach episode 42: How to Know What People Value

Question from Tyler
How do you get off the phone with someone who is a long-winded "good ole boy?" My analysts each work with lots of sales reps, and many accounts.

We have a few sales reps who like to call every day, and invariably the call ends up being 15-25 minutes. A lot of drawn out, slow responses. Talking about local news, smalltalk before they want to get down to business.

This is a really essential part of the local culture, but my team doesn't have time for it. If every rep did that every day, we'd have to work 16 hours a day just to get off the phones.

Bonni mentioned How to End a Conversation video posted on The Art of Manliness
Question from Roger
I am a trainer in a corporation that just went through an acquisition. My manager has assured me that he likes training and will keep this position for the foreseeable future. He’s has asked me about my future plans/desires, my answer was that I love the role I am in but would like to make it grow into a “Manager” position since my duties vary especially now.

My current project may take a few years. At the same time I am very engaged with my home facility trying to create and be a part of any new systems or leadership training for my local/regional team. Any advice from you and Bonni? These are the areas I “think” I want to grow and need help to “intraprenurally” achieve:

Remain a crucial component to the company in the current training role.
Evolve the role into mentoring, technical and future training opportunities.
Create a manager position to grow into.

I do not have any specific training credentials or graduate degrees just 20+ years of service in various capacities.
Audio Question from Phil
Dave mentioned finding Transitioning Vets by Bill Nowicki on iTunes

Dave recommends the following article on mentoring:

10 Ways to Be a Better Mentor From Those Who’ve Done It
Feed Your Career Octopus: Tips For Finding (And Keeping) Awesome Mentors

“Sometimes our nervousness can translate into a deep, high regard for another person and what they’ve contributed.” -Bonni Stachowiak
Question from Shannon
I'm struggling with a boss whose management style is "adhoc-cratic". In addition, she values relationships but not timely and thorough intra office communication, and she is slow to follow through.

This has delayed work and caused much tension and poor communication with our senior leadership. One senior leader says she holds me equally responsible, though this seems completely unfair given the power dynamics and balance of responsibility, especially when it comes to managing the work of other staff.

I've taken on much responsibility to compensate, but am concerned that I can't do both of our jobs in the long-term. I have two young children and 90 hour work weeks are not possible. Without additional staff, I would burn out and the timeliness and quality of the work might be compromised. How do I manage up in this situation?
Reminder from Duke
“The servant-leader is servant first. It begins with the natural feeling that one wants to serve, and serve first. The conscious choice brings one to aspire to lead.” -Robert Greenleaf

Dave mentioned episode 137: The Power of Servant Leadership
Suggestion from Rick
I find the word feedback often has a negative connotation for peo...

Sep 07 2015

Play

Rank #13: 161: How To Address Difficult Conversations

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Bonni and I respond to questions from the Coaching for Leaders community on how to handle difficult conversations and more.
Guest: Bonni Stachowiak
Teaching in Higher Ed

Question from Leonardo
I´m one of your fans, I listen your podcast every day and I see better results on my day job managing an emergency room in Brazilian Hospital. I'm a cardiologist and today I work as a manger also. I was listening the episode 143, about feedback, while I was driving to my job and I was thinking how difficult to me is receive a negative feedback. I think that what struggle in this situation is emotion and controlling the emotion to respond or give some excuse for that negative perception. When I give any feedback to my employees I saw this same problem. How do I train myself to be better on that?

Episode #143: Accepting Feedback With Sheila Heen of Difficult Conversations
Episode #107: Three Steps To Soliciting Feedback with Tom Henschel
Lets Get Real Or Let's Not Play by Mahan Khalsa*

Question from Dow

Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, Sheila Heen*
The Dale Carnegie Course
How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie*
Positive Coaching by Jim Thompson*

Question from Nathan
I am not currently in a "leadership" position but I feel that I am being called to leadership and feel that leadership and coaching is something that I would enjoy long term. I wanted to ask what recommendations you would have to really start moving in this direction and to start developing those skills. I've been trying to read books and listen to podcast to get some insight but haven't really had the opportunity to hone these skills. I am looking at going to toastmasters to get some experience/training in public speaking to get started working on something I don't feel I'm strong in. Do you have any recommendations of things like Toastmasters that I can check out or any suggestions on steps I could take to improve my leadership and coaching skills?

Toastmasters
Junior Chamber International (Jaycees)

Feedback

Join the conversation: http://coachingforleaders.com/161
Comments, questions, or feedback for future Q&A shows: http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback
Next Q&A show is episode #165 on Networking

Thank you to weekly update subscribers Jane Stachowiak, Melissa Minneci, Nick Smith, Adam Trainque, Jared Weikum, Guto Nicolazzi, Susan Smith, Federico De Obeso, Eduardo Mifano, John Mihalyo, Neil, Marcus Wallace, Adriana Ramirez, Tim Hill, Richard Carter, Clayton Dumcum, Jared Gonzalez, M. Key, Chris Bazille, Aaron Saray, Scott Bray, Chris Bean, Carina Costa, Shaun Ng, Rodney Freeman, Dow Tippett, Tom Kennedy, Kevin Lease, Jennifer Hammonds, David Kane, Francisco Prezoto, Marcia Roberts, Sharon Sauro, and Jennifer Mueller.

Receive the 10 Leadership Books That Will Help You Get Better Results From Others, including 2 books that I rely on weekly. You can subscribe at http://coachingforleaders.com/subscribe

Thank you also to David Wissore for leaving a written review on Stitcher and Eve Oliveira for leaving a written review on iTunes. If you've been listening to this show for a bit and feel like you can provide an honest review, kindly visit iTunes or Stitcher and leave a written review for the show. Thank you in advance!

Oct 06 2014

Play

Rank #14: 148: The Four Critical Stories Leaders Need For Influence, with David Hutchens

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Leaders often hear about influence through storytelling, but don't know where to start. Here are four stories to tell and how to get started.
Guest: David Hutchens
DavidHutchens.com
Author of the Upcoming Book: Circle of the 9 Muses: A Storytelling Field Guide for Innovators

Storytelling is utilized for influence

“It’s more important to tell a strategic story, to tell the right story, even if you don’t tell it particularly well.” -David Hutchens

The starting point of telling stories is permission

Storytelling is a skill that nobody really has to learn since it’s our natural language

Leaders needs to give themselves permission to tell a story in their organization

The 4 stories leaders need to tell

Who we are stories - what it means to be us

Think about the stories parents and caregivers told you when you were young about what it was like growing up for them
When we do this, we impart information about what we believe and who we are today
Every organization and team has an origin story
David shared the origin story of General Electric
A story from a leader always has a reason for telling it
What are the identity and origin stories that you have?
Vision stories - the future we desire

These stories should be told in present tense language
You can tell a story about somebody else that is already doing what it is you envision
You might tell a story about someone else if it’s a big jump from where the organization is today
Values in action stories - how the espoused values show up in our organization

David mentioned Zappos and the stories they create about customer service
The stories being told also affect how members of the organization make future choices
The right story should reconnect people with why they really care about this work
Change and learning stories - the stories about a time we tried something and learned from it

This is generally the hardest story to tell
Think about the leaders you’ve loved and appreciated the most (the best ones do this well)
These stories can build culture and loyalty
David shared the failure story of New Coke
Here’s the structure:

I tried something
Here’s the bad result I got
Here’s why I got that bad result
Here’s how I’m now changing my behavior so I get a better result next time
Don’t try to change your voice and be a professional storyteller: talk like you

Feedback

On this topic: http://coachingforleaders.com/148
Comments, questions, or feedback: http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback

The final opportunity for listener survey is this week. Please take five minutes to complete the anonymous survey at: http://coachingforleaders.com/survey

Thank you to Arch Daws, Torrey Peace, Brent Miller, Bridget Blackford, Hector Gutierrez, David Welch, Jeff Trimble, Deepak Kahlon, Christy Owen, Leandro Soares, Kevin Kawada, Kevin McClelland, Katie Arnst, Mandy Blasby, Malcolm McDonald, Dawn Ranagan, and Henry Rihard Pasaribu for subscribing to my weekly update this past week. You can subscribe as well at http://coachingforleaders.com/subscribe

Jul 07 2014

39mins

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Rank #15: 237: These Coaching Questions Get Results, with Michael Bungay Stanier

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Michael Bungay Stanier: The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More, and Change the Way You Lead Forever*
Quotes
I think there are as many definitions for coaching as there are people selling coaching.
—Michael Bungay Stanier

Slow down on the advice giving, and stay curious just a little bit longer.
—Michael Bungay Stanier

That’s part of the nature of a system; as soon you start changing stuff, it starts pushing back.
—Michael Bungay Stanier

Your organization is a system, and the very nature of a system is to love its own system.
—Michael Bungay Stanier

You want people to become lazy coaches … lazy because you want the other person to be doing the work. When they’re doing the work, they’re actually unlocking their own potential … you’re helping them to learn, rather than teaching them.
—Michael Bungay Stanier

We’re all okay with saying no to the stuff we don’t really want to do, but do we have the courage and discipline to say no to the stuff we do want to do?
—Michael Bungay Stanier
Feedback

Comments, questions, or feedback for future question and answer shows: http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback
The next question and answer show is episode 239

Applications are again open for membership in the Coaching for Leaders Mastermind. Membership details and how to apply can be found at this link:

http://coachingforleaders.com/mastermind

Applications will close promptly on April 1, 2016.

Want to be featured as a member spotlight on a future episode? If so, visit http://coachingforleaders.com/spotlight

Please join my weekly leadership guide. The leadership guide is delivered to your inbox each Wednesday and includes my thoughts and recommendations on the best articles, podcasts, videos, and books to support your development between shows. It also includes a brief overview and link to the full weekly show notes.

As a bonus, when you join the weekly leadership guide, you’ll get immediate access to my readers' guide listing the 10 leadership books that will help you get better results from others, with brief summaries from me on the value of each book. Download the 11-page readers' guide and 9-minute video of these book recommendations at http://coachingforleaders.com/subscribe
Thank You
Thank you to Trishul Patel and Adam the Educator for the kind reviews on iTunes. If you would like to post a review as well, it's a huge help in the growth of the Coaching for Leaders community. If you use iTunes, just visit http://coachingforleaders.com/itunes – and thank you in advance for your support!

Mar 21 2016

42mins

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Rank #16: 376: How to Become the Person You Want to Be, with James Clear

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James Clear: Atomic Habits
James Clear is an author and speaker focused on habits, decision-making, and continuous improvement. He is a regular speaker at Fortune 500 companies and his work is used by teams in the NFL, NBA, and MLB. He’s the author of the new book, Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones*.
Key Points

Goals are great for deciding what direction you want to head, but to actually get there it’s all about your systems.
Results aren’t what needs to change; the processes and habits are what need to change.
Start with the identity you want for yourself and build your habits to reinforce that identity.
Your habits are what prove your identity to yourself.
Habits are like compound interest for self-improvement.

Bonus Audio

How habits reinforce your identity

Resources Mentioned

Atomic Habits* by James Clear
James Clear on Annual Reviews

Related Episodes

Getting Things Done with David Allen (episode 184)
Create Behavior That Lasts With Marshall Goldsmith (episode 196)
The Best Way to Make New Habits Reality (episode 217)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

Oct 15 2018

36mins

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Rank #17: 201: How Introverts Make Great Leaders

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Beth Buelow (Facebook)
Author, The Introvert Entrepreneur: Amplify Your Strengths and Create Success on Your Own Terms*
Host, The Introvert Entrepreneur podcast
There is often an overt expectation of extraversion in the workplace.

Extraversion: gain energy from social interaction and external stimuli
Introversion: gain energy from quiet and solitude

“The goal is not to be the fake extravert. The goal is to be the authentic introvert.” -Beth Buelow

Beth mentioned Good to Great* by Jim Collins

Dave mentioned How to Win Friends and Influence People* by Dale Carnegie

“Please oh please, don’t confuse enthusiasm with noise.” -Beth Buelow

Dave mentioned episode #44: Susan Cain on The Power of Introverts

Beth mentioned some of the principles from Dale Carnegie that relate directly to introverted energy. Carnegie's principles also demonstrate that introverts make great leaders:

Become genuinely interested in other people.
Smile.
Be a good listener. Encourage other people to talk about themselves.
Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
Do not imitate others.

Beth mentioned How to Stop Worrying and Start Living* by Dale Carnegie

“Listen contains the same letters as silent.” -Beth Buelow
Feedback

Comments, questions, or feedback for future Q&A shows: http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback
The next Q&A show is episode 204
Resources for leaders: http://coachingforleaders.com/resources

Please join my weekly leadership guide. The leadership guide is delivered to your inbox each Wednesday and includes my thoughts and recommendations on the best articles, podcasts, videos, and books, to support your development between shows. It also includes a brief overview and link to the full weekly show notes. If you, like me, tend to listen to podcasts while you’re on the road or exercising, this will give you an easy way to follow-up later on the links and resources we mention in every show.

As a bonus, when you join the weekly leadership guide, you’ll get immediate access to my reader’s guide listing the 10 Leadership Books that Will Help You Get Better Results From Others with brief summaries from me on the value of each book. Download the 11-page reader's guide and 9-minute video of these book recommendations…plus, insight on the 2 books that I rely on weekly! http://coachingforleaders.com/subscribe
Thank You
Thank you to Keith Shaw for the kind review on iTunes. If you would like to post a review as well, it's a huge help in the growth of the Coaching for Leaders community. If you use iTunes, just visit http://coachingforleaders.com/itunes and if you use Stitcher, please visit http://coachingforleaders.com/stitcher – and thank you in advance for your support!

Jul 13 2015

Play

Rank #18: 272: Enhance Your Executive Presence, with Muriel Maignan Wilkins

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Muriel Maignan Wilkins: Own the Room
Muriel is the Managing Partner and Co-Founder of Paravis Partners. She is the co-author, with Amy Su, of Own the Room: Discover Your Signature Voice to Master Your Leadership Presence.
Key Points

It’s about learning to adapt and learning how you bring your best self forward for the situation at play.
Effective leadership presence does two things: (1) it makes an impression through the value it brings to the table and (2) it connects with its stakeholders.
A leader who has presence is able to both demonstrate their value in an authentic way that is unique to them while at the same time connect with their stakeholders.
Credibility and reliability are two things people look for in every leader.
When you walk into a meeting, think about what assumptions you are making, what communication strategies you are going to use, and what kind of energy you’re bringing.

Resources Mentioned

What Got You Here Won’t Get You There by Marshall Goldsmith
www.paravispartners.com

Ft. Lauderdale Meetup
Are you in South Florida? I’m putting together an informal meetup for listeners on the evening of Tuesday, November 22nd in the Ft. Lauderdale area. For details, visit http://coachingforleaders.com/florida
Activate Your Free Coaching for Leaders Membership
Get immediate access to my free, 10-day audio course, 10 Ways to Empower the People You Lead. Give me 10 minutes a day for 10 days to get the most immediate, practical actions to become a better leader. Join at CoachingforLeaders.com.
Related Episodes

CFL188: The Art of Stage Presence with James Whittaker
CFL196: Marshall Goldsmith on Triggers: Creating Behavior That Lasts
CFL220: How to Find the Right Voice

Next Episode
Mindy Danna appears on the show next week to teach us all about the stages of adult development.

Nov 19 2016

31mins

Play

Rank #19: 344: The Way to Have Conversations That Matter, with Celeste Headlee

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Celeste Headlee: We Need to Talk
Celeste Headlee is an award-winning journalist who has appeared on NPR, PBS World, PRI, CNN, BBC and other international networks. She hosts a daily talk show called “On Second Thought” for Georgia Public Broadcasting in Atlanta. She’s the author of the book We Need to Talk: How to Have Conversations That Matter*.
Key Points

Dysfunctional conversations (especially about politics) are nothing new. What is new is how virtually every decision we make has been politicized.
When in a conversation, let go of the burden of trying to convince someone of something.
Listen to someone to hear their perspective rather than only waiting to hear what they say just so you can refute it.
When you’re trying to take in information, you cannot also be holding an agenda.
If you don’t know an answer, don’t try to hide it. Just say, “I don’t know, but I’ll find out.”
People have less empathy towards others than they used to.
It’s possible to find something in common with almost anyone if you ask a few questions.

Resources Mentioned

We Need to Talk: How to Have Conversations That Matter* by Celeste Headlee
10 Ways to Have a Better Conversation (Celeste’s TED talk)
Don’t Find a Job, Find a Mission
Help Make America Talk Again

Book Notes
Download my highlights from We Need to Talk in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

How to Know What to Ask, with Andrew Warner (episode 198)
Use Power for Good and Not Evil, with Dacher Keltner (episode 254)
How to Increase Your Conversational Intelligence, with with Judith Glaser (episode 271)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

Apr 09 2018

37mins

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Rank #20: 177: How to Start a Conversation With Anyone

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Mark Sieverkropp walks through six steps that will help all of us start a conversation with anyone, anywhere.

Mark Sieverkropp
Author, How to Start a Conversation With Anyone
Mark and I were both featured by Forbes as 25 Professional Networking Experts to Watch in 2015

1. First Impressions last the longest

John Corcoran spoke in episode 169 on what we can do to recover from a bad first impression

2. Practice the type of listening that makes a difference

“...if you aspire to be a good conversationalist, be an attentive listener. To be interesting, be interested. Ask questions that other persons will enjoy answering. Encourage them to talk about themselves and their accomplishments.” -Dale Carnegie

3. Understand who people are by how they act

4. People like others who share their same interests

5. Do not hold your listener hostage

6. Remembering the conversation is crucial to growing the relationship

Finally, follow-up by building upon your initial conversation and showing interest

Learn more about the Networking With Purpose event being held on February 10, 2015 at 3:00 p.m. EST. You can discover more and register for the event at this affiliate link:

http://coachingforleaders.com/networkingwithpurpose

To get Mark's book, How to Start a Conversation With Anyone, use this link:

http://coachingforleaders.com/startaconversation
Feedback

Join the conversation: http://coachingforleaders.com/177
Comments, questions, or feedback for future Q&A shows: http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback
Next Q&A show is episode #178 and the topic is accountability

Please join my weekly leadership guide. The leadership guide is delivered to your inbox each Wednesday and includes my thoughts and recommendations on the best articles, podcasts, videos, and books, to support your development between shows. It also includes a brief overview and link to the full weekly show notes. If you, like me, tend to listen to podcasts while you’re on the road or exercising, this will give you an easy way to follow-up later on the links and resources we mention in every show. Thank you to the following people who joined the weekly leadership guide this past week:

Quay Kester, David Deaton, Tracey Chalmers, Vicki Bastian, Russ Vilt, Ricardo Montaño Ozuna, Fiona Adamson, Alessandro Beraldi, Dena Simoneaux, Khalil Khalek, Casey Comstock, Adrienne Wiebusch, Paul Ward, Ulana Dabbs, Michael Chamberlin, Mike Haire, David Walker, and Mark Sieverkropp.

As a bonus, when you join the weekly leadership guide, you’ll get immediate access to my guide on the 10 Leadership Books that Will Help You Get Better Results From Others. Download the 11-page reader's guide and 9-minute video of my top leadership book recommendations…plus, insight on the 2 books that I rely on weekly! Just visit http://coachingforleaders.com/subscribe

Thank you to Kenny Wheeler for the kind reviews on iTunes. If you would like to post review as well, it will be a huge help for all of us to grow the Coaching for Leaders community. If you use iTunes, just visit http://coachingforleaders.com/itunes and if you use Stitcher, please visit http://coachingforleaders.com/stitcher - and thank you in advance for your support!

Jan 26 2015

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