Rank #1: Become a Master of Emotional, Mental, and Physical Strength with Chris Duffin
Chris Duffin is an accomplished power lifter, coach and gym owner, he holds the world record for the raw squat in the 220 lb weight class and holds a Guinness World Record for the most weight deadlifted in 1 minute with 42 reps at 405 lbs. He is the head coach and co owner at the Elite Performance Center.Favorite Success Quote
Reject complacency like it’s a poison, chase your vision like its your last breath, this is your path to achieving greatness”Key Points
1. Reject Complacency and Live in Fear
If you are not growing then you are dying. If you are a driven man who wants to achieve great things in your life and you take the action necessary to achieve those things, then odds are, you will come to a point in your life where you are comfortable. You will have made your millions, become successful with women, possibly having the dream wife, the big house, and the passive income business. But this is when life becomes most dangerous.
Life is unpredictable and volatile. Once you achieve success you are at your most vulnerable because this is when you feel that you have permission to stop growing and pushing yourself.
This is something that you must root out of your life like a cancer. You have to constantly grow, reject complacency, and live in fear. Live in fear because you are doing things that you don’t know you will be able to achieve, things that are making you better and making you stronger.
2. Success Builds Trust
If you want people to trust you, show them results. If you have a proven track record behind your name, then people will naturally support you when you start to take on more and more challenging tasks and activities.
How can you expect your family to trust you in starting and growing a new business when you haven’t even achieved success in your current job? How can you expect business partners and investors to trust you when you have no proof of your abilities.
Do what it takes to become successful and later, whenever you are making bigger and bigger leaps, you will already have the trust of the important people in your life.
3. Prioritize Your Life
The age old excuse that you don’t have time for something is just a big lie you keep telling yourself. You have time for whatever you prioritize, and if you do not prioritize business, health or relationships, then they will suffer, there’s no way around it.
If you want to achieve greatness then you have to prioritize it.
Rank #2: The Uncomfortable Truth About Relationships You NEED to Hear with Neil Strauss
Neil Strauss is the author of the New York Times bestsellers The Game, Rules of the Game, Emergency, and Everyone Loves You When You’re Dead and The Truth, An Uncomfortable Book About Relationships
He is also the co-author of three other New York Times bestsellers – Jenna Jameson’s How to Make Love Like a Porn Star, Mötley Crüe’s The Dirt and Marilyn Manson’s The Long Hard Road out of Hell. A writer for Rolling Stone, Strauss lives in Los Angeles.Favorite Quote
“The underlying cause of most unfulfilled lives, is simply that we are too close to ourselves to see clearly enough to get out of our own way”~Neil StraussKey Points
1. Understand how to Gauge Feedback
Life will often give you feedback about how you are doing across various areas. You may find yourself repeating the same patterns, getting into the same type of relationships, or making the same mistakes. Whatever the case, if you want to make a change you have to gauge feedback.
You have to look at the patterns in your life and discover what lesson they are trying to teach you. What does it say about you and your life that you are constantly dating the same type of girl and falling into the traps of “project dating”? What can you learn from the fact that you are constantly losing jobs after a few months?
Take a cold hard, honest look at your life and look at what the feedback is telling you and then change accordingly.
2. Your Level of Self Esteem will Equal the Level of Your Relationships
Have you ever heard the phrase opposites attract?
Well that’s bull shit. Like attracts like, and if you are finding yourself getting into relationships with women where you are both in an unhealthy emotional relationship, odds are, your own self esteem is lacking.
If you want to attract better women, first become better yourself and change what you accept from others and from yourself. If you have low self esteem you will never be able to attract a woman with high self esteem, and if you have high self esteem, you will never get sucked into a toxic relationships with a woman who has low self esteem.
3. Finding Your Passion is Simple
If you want to find your purpose, and passion, do stuff you love.
That’s it. If you love doing something, then keep doing it, don’t worry about whether it’s your real purpose or whether you should change careers to follow the money, simply do things that you love doing and you will never fail.
Rank #3: Create Emotional Tension to Master Seduction and Dating with Dr. Robert Glover
Dr. Robert Glover, author of No More Mr. Nice Guy: A Proven Plan For Getting What You Want in Love, Sex and Life (Running Press, 2003)
Dr. Glover is an internationally recognized authority on the Nice Guy Syndrome. He is a frequent guest on radio talk shows and has been featured in numerous local and national publications.
Through his book, online classes, workshops, podcasts, blogs, consultation, and therapy groups, Dr. Glover has helped change the lives of countless men and women around the world.Favorite Quote
“If you obey all the rules you miss all the fun”~Audrey HepburnKey Points
1. Nothing Hidden Nothing Half-assed
To stop being the nice guy and unleash your inner alpha, you have to stop hiding. Stop hiding what you are thinking because you are afraid of what other people will say about you. Stop hiding your thoughts and feelings towards women because you are afraid it will upset them and cause tension. Stop bs'ing people to make them happy. Be you
Once you stop lying and keeping things hidden, you must stop doing things halfway. If you are going to do something, go all in, hold nothing back. If you are half in, it is probably a sign that you are doing something that is incongruent with who you are and your mission in life, and you should likely reevaluate your reasons for doing it.
2. You Already Have Enough Information
The problem facing most guys today is not lack of information, but rather a lack of action on the information they already know. You already know everything that you need to know to begin taking the action that will help you achieve your goals in your dating, physical, and financial lives. It’s simple.
To be healthy, eat whole foods and exercise everyday. To get good with women, talk to more women. To become rich, work hard on a side hustle until you can quit your job and then save and invest at least 15% of your income. Simple right?
But are you taking the action?
3. Women Need Emotional Tension
Something that most men do not understand is that women want positive tension in their lives (why do you think they enjoy those damn soap operas?). They want a man who will challenge them and tease them. They want a man who is completely unafraid of their reaction.
The best ways to build emotional tension are to touch, tease, and tell.
Touch her playfully throughout the interaction. Touch her arm, spin her, hold her hand, break the touch barrier, the sooner the better. Tease her in a kind hearted way that shows you are a challenge and may even get close to crossing the line every once in awhile. And finally, just freaking tell her what it on your mind. Don’t play games and don’t kid people.
Build the tension and be brutally honest.
(Touch tease and tell)
Rank #4: Find Your Discipline and You Will Find Your Freedom With Jocko Willink
Jocko Willink is a decorated retired Navy SEAL officer, author of the book Extreme Ownership: How U.S. Navy SEALs Lead and Win, and co-founder of Echelon Front, where he is a leadership instructor, speaker, and executive coach. Jocko spent 20 years in the U.S. Navy SEAL Teams, starting as an enlisted SEAL and rising through the ranks to become a SEAL officer. As commander of SEAL Team Three’s Task Unit Bruiser during the battle of Ramadi, he orchestrated SEAL operations that helped the “Ready First” Brigade of the US Army’s First Armored Division bring stability to the violent, war-torn city.
As commander of SEAL Team Three’s Task Unit Bruiser during the battle of Ramadi, he orchestrated SEAL operations that helped the “Ready First” Brigade of the US Army’s First Armored Division bring stability to the violent, war-torn city.
Task Unit Bruiser became the most highly decorated Special Operations Unit of the Iraq War. Jocko returned from Iraq to serve as Officer-in-Charge of training for all West Coast SEAL Teams. There, he spearheaded the development of leadership training and personally instructed and mentored the next generation of SEAL leaders who have continued to perform with great success on the battlefield.
During his career, Jocko was awarded the Silver Star, the Bronze Star, and numerous other personal and unit awards. In 2010, Jocko retired from the Navy and launched Echelon Front where he teaches the leadership principles he learned on the battlefield to help others lead and win. Clients include individuals, teams, companies, and organizations across a wide-range of industries and fields.Favorite Success Quote
“Discipline equals freedom”Key Points
1. Discipline Gives You True Freedom
If you want freedom, then forget all the crap about life hacks, smart drugs, and shortcuts.
If you want freedom, then you must cultivate extreme levels of discipline.
I don’t care if you want to do the important things.
I don’t care if you feel like handling your responsibilities.
I don’t care if you want to wake up early and grind.
Just fucking rise and grind.
Discipline equals freedom.
2. You Have to Be Humble
Once you have cultivated discipline and overcome your weakness and propensity to allow your feelings in the moment to dictate your life, arrogance becomes your most dangerous enemy.
Just because you have achieved a certain level of success does not mean that you have it figured out.
The day that you think you know it all, the day that you stop trying to grow, and the day you stop learning from others…
That’s the day that you will fall and you will fall hard.
3. Take Extreme Ownership
Whatever circumstances life has given you, it’s time to man up and own them.
Step up and take charge of the results that you are producing or failing to produce.
Take ownership of your marriage, your business, and your finances.
Sure, you can piss away your time blaming others, whining, and moaning.
But you will lose respect from the people who matter and accomplish nothing in the process.
Or, you can let go of your ego, accept responsibility, and take extreme ownership.
And when are willing to swallow your pride and take ownership of your life and success, you will cultivate respect for yourself and respect from others.
4. Detach Emotions from Your Decision-Making Process
If you want to sabotage your success and ruin all chances of high achievement, then allow your emotions to dictate your decision making.
If you want to achieve greatly, lead effectively, and create massive success in your life, then learn to detach your emotions from important decisions.
I don’t care if you like an under-performing employee and feel bad about letting them go.
If you have done everything you can to empower them and call them forward, and they still fail… it’s time to let them go.
I don’t care if you don’t feel like getting up and doing your work for the day.
It’s time to rise and hustle.
When it comes to important decisions, you must lead with logic.
I don’t care how you feel.
Feelings don’t win wars, build businesses, or change the world.
Smart and consistent action does.
5. Win the Mornings and Win Your Day
If you want to have great days, then start with great mornings.
Jocko rises every morning at 4:30 a.m. and hits the gym long before distractions or other people’s agendas can start to distract him and interfere with his goals.
To achieve high levels of success, you must accomplish your most important tasks first thing every morning before the rest of the world is awake.
If you can do this, success is all but guaranteed.
Rank #5: How and Why to Build Your Band of Brothers With Stephen Mansfield
Stephen Mansfield is a New York Times bestselling author and a popular speaker who works with leaders worldwide.
He first rose to global attention with his groundbreaking book The Faith of George W. Bush, a bestseller that Time magazine credited with helping shape the 2004 U.S. presidential election. The book was also a source for Oliver Stone’s award-winning film “W.” Mansfield’s The Faith of Barack Obama was another international bestseller.
He has written celebrated biographies of Booker T. Washington, George Whitefield, Winston Churchill, Pope Benedict XVI, and Abraham Lincoln, among others. Publishers Weekly described his book, Killing Jesus, as “masterful.”Favorite Success Quote
“The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation” ~Henry David ThoreauKey Points
1. Manly Men Need Other Manly Men
No man is an island.
Even though you have heard the saying hundreds if not thousands of times, few men truly internalize what it means, and still fewer act on it.
Just look at the statistics.
A simple scroll across the front pages and you will find sky-high suicide rates among males, loneliness, depression, and anxiety in numbers that we have never seen before.
Why is this?
While there are many theories and hypothesis, a critical look at the situation makes things clear.
We are a species that was built to be in community, and even though we are more connected now than ever before, most of us are utterly and absolutely alone.
We have no one to call us up, no one to celebrate with us, no one to challenge us, to help us, to hold us accountable and keep us to our word.
And because of this deterioration in our social structure men have become soft, weak, and effeminate.
But it doesn’t have to be this way.
As a man, you have the power to break this pattern.
Make a conscious effort to meet and befriend other men. And when you are in these friendships, dive deeper than you ever have before.
Hold nothing back and hold each other up.
You will be amazed at the results.
2. Manly Men Do Manly Things
If you want to call yourself a man, then you need to do manly things.
Does this mean that you should shave with a tomahawk, lift boulders for fun, and skin polar bears with your fingernails?
Probably not (although that would be quite cool), it simply means that you need to embrace the masculine nature of doing instead of spectating and talking.
Get off of your butt and get into life!
Learn a new skill, fix things, build things, explore, create, conquer.
Especially if you are a younger man, get off of the darn Xbox and learn something practical.
Teach yourself how to maintain a car, learn how to build and fix things, become a better public speaker.
Quit talking and take action, starting yesterday.
3. Manly Men Tend Their Field
Every man has his own field to tend.
No, I don’t mean this literally, although some of you might.
What I mean is that every man has his own set of duties and responsibilities and if you want to consider yourself a man, then you must tend to those responsibilities.
Whether you are 15 listening to this podcast or 50, we all have our own fields.
For some of you, it’s school work, your girlfriend, and your football buddies.
For others, it’s your 8-figure company, your wife of 30 years, and non-profit.
It doesn’t matter what your particular field is, what matters is that you are diligent in tending to and watering your field.
Be disciplined in your action.
Do what needs to be done.
Tend your field.
4. Manly Men Build Manly Men
One of the less flaunted traits of manly men is that they build other manly men.
There is an old saying that the true mark of a leader is not how many followers he has but how many leaders he creates.
Regardless of your religion or personal beliefs about the historicity of Jesus Christ, his virtues as a leader are unquestionable.
However, where Jesus excelled was at building up other leaders, in his case, disciples.
In fact, he was such an effective leader that of the 12 men who followed him, all but one (or two counting Judas) were martyred for their belief in Christ.
Now, whether you believe the stories or not, there is a powerful lesson to be learned about leadership and about the importance of building up those who are around you.
Are you really a man if all you can do is take from others and be built up?
Or do you need to take a step back and see who you can serve instead?
5. Manly Men Sacrifice Their Pleasures for Their Purpose
The true hallmark characteristic of all manly men is their ability to endure suffering.
Manly men know that all greatness was bred through suffering.
You must experience the pain and suffering of building and losing your dreams before you will be able to fully appreciate, live, and achieve in the ways that you desire.
With the exception of individuals with inherited wealth, no man of substance, no man of great success, and no man of wealth ever achieved their status and material pleasures without first sacrificing and delaying gratification.
If you want to be great, be ready to suffer.
If you want to be great, don’t ask yourself what you want, ask yourself what you are willing to bleed for.
Rank #6: Developing Your Fearless Mind with Cole Hatter
Cole is an author, investor, award winning speaker and entrepreneur. He is passionate about truly living life, creating massive financial success for himself and others, and most importantly, giving back. Cole has taught tens of thousands of people to be more than just alive, but to become the best versions of themselves, create massive profits, and then impact others by living a life of significance.
Having barely escaped death 2 times in 2 separate accidents, Cole has a true appreciation for life and lives it to the fullest. He loves boating, is a water sport enthusiast, adrenaline junkie, drives fast cars, is a husband, father, and philanthropist. Cole’s story of losing everything, even temporarily his ability to walk, to now having monumental success is truly inspirational.Favorite Success Quote “The truth is you can spend your life any way you want but you can only spend it once”~John C. Maxwell Key Points
1. The World Teaches Life Wrong
Society, the media, friends and even family have taught you the wrong way to go about doing life.
We are all taught from a young age that if we just go to college, get good grades and a good degree, then find a safe secure job and work our asses off for 20 years, then we will be ok. We will be successful.
We’re taught that success is about keeping up with the Joneses, having a bigger house, a faster car, a bigger credit card max, or sending your kids to a more prestigious private school.
But what we aren’t taught is that success is really about doing things that you love. Success is about finding what you are passionate about and good at, finding your God given gifts and then applying those to live a life of impact.
Success is about having fulfilling relationships, meaningful work, joyful experiences, and leaving a legacy. And if big houses and fast cars are a part of that for you, than more power to you. Just realize that there is more to life than society’s definition of success, and keeping up with the joneses and working that “secure” job until you retire is a one stop ticket to a life of regret.
2. Focus on Creation
If you want to succeed in life and business, then start focusing on creation. Spend more time focusing on how you can create better content, create more value in the market place, and create better resources for people and spend less time worrying how you can “get” more.
Business is about creation, it’s about adding value and building something that your audience wants and needs.
3. Eliminate Distractions that Prevent You From Living Life
Facebook, Twitter, Netflix, Adult Content. All of these, when taken to extremes are nothing more than distractions that will prevent you from living the life of your dreams.
If you want to be successful and live life on your terms, you must begin to eliminate distractions and toxic activities/individuals that are poisoning your life. If you constantly find yourself wasting hours on Facebook, block it. If you are always watching Netflix, cancel your subscription for a while.
(Do realize that after a long day of working on important things and getting crap done, you have earned the right to crash with some Game of Thrones of The Walking Dead, it’s when it prevents you from achieving desired results that it becomes an issue)
4. Surround Yourself With Top People in Your Industry
Success leaves clues, it’s not an accident or an art, it’s a science.
If you want to be as successful as you can, you must surround yourself with other individuals in your industry who are achieving at a high level. Figure out what they are doing and copy it. As Picasso said “Good artists copy, great artists steal.”
You must realize that success is not a solo venture, you need mentors and accountability in your life and by surrounding yourself with people achieving on a higher level you will basically shortcut your way to success by avoiding pitfalls that they made and finding the things that worked and doing them that much quicker.
Rank #7: How to Master the Art of Seduction Through Spirituality With Miki Spies
Miki Spies is a spiritual coach with powerful and easily applicable teachings. She is an amazing coach and transformational speaker with an enthusiastic message of manifestation.Favorite Success Quote
“Being entirely honest with oneself is an important exercise.” ~ Sigmund FreudKey Points
1. Great Sex is About Presence
Many men think that great sex is all about technique and stamina, but the truth is, while those may be important, great sex is about presence.
It is about showing up and giving your all, being fully focused and present in each moment.
Great sex is as much a mental and spiritual activity as it is physical.
2. Everything About You is Foreplay
Some men believe that foreplay, like sex, is all about what happens in the bedroom. However, foreplay starts the second that you lay eyes on a woman.
Everything about you is foreplay, from the way that you present yourself, to the interactions you have, to the presence that you show in your conversation.
3. Don’t Regret a Damn Thing
Everything that has ever happened up until this very second made you who you are. Don’t regret any of it.
The decisions you have made, both bad and good brought you to where you are today and will help to prepare you for what is to come in the future.
Embrace them, don’t regret them. Don’t waste time wishing to change things that cannot, and should not be changed.
4. Never Settle
If you ever feel that you are settling in a relationship, then you are doing yourself and your woman a disservice. You can never be truly happy when you feel that you are settling and it will affect every other area of your life.
Your work life, health, platonic relationships, and personal development will all stagnate whenever you have a women in your life who you are not passionate about and who does not push you to grow and become a better man.
Do yourself and your woman a favor and end things now.
5. Anticipation is the Key to Success
If you want to truly succeed and stand out with women, you have to learn to master the art of anticipation.
Women are used to men fawning over them, trying to get into their pants on the first date, and trying to escalate much too quickly.
Instead, learn to build the anticipation. Slow things down a little bit, exercise some restraint. Not only will you be able to make better decisions in your relationships, but women will respect and want you even more.
Rank #8: Rediscovering the Lost Art of Authentic Seduction with Zan Perrion
Zan Perrion is internationally recognized as one of the most original and insightful voices on relationships and seduction in the world today. A regular media commentator, he has been widely featured in the international press.
Zan is the founder of the Ars Amorata philosophy–a celebration of the art of seduction, the rebirth of romance, and a lifelong quest for beauty and adventure. He is also a co-founder of the Amorati network of men and author of The Alabaster GirlFavorite Success Quote “Beauty needs a witness”~Zan Perrion Key Points
1. The Greatest Seduction is Authenticity
Today, there are a plethora of dating coaches and pickup “gurus” claiming that they have the secret sauce to seduction, the one line that will immediately drop panties and guarantee quick effortless sex.
However, what these so-called gurus do not realize, and where they are doing most men a disservice, is that seduction is all about authenticity. It’s about being who you are, expressing your desire unashamedly and fearlessly. It’s about being willing to open up and share the parts of you that you don’t think women will like.
If you want to be a great seducer and lover, you first have to be authentic, to be the grounded masculine man who knows who he is and what he wants in life and is openly living and expressing that on a daily basis.
Forget all of the cloak and dagger techniques and one-liners, just be real, be you, and be authentic. If a woman can’t appreciate that then she wouldn’t have been a good fit in your life anyways and you save yourself wasted effort on a relationship that would have been built upon a facade.
2. A Great Lover Appreciates the Beauty of All Women
Something many men fail to do is to appreciate the beauty in all women. Sure they appreciate the tan, fit, busty blonde, but they forget to see the beauty in every woman they come into contact with.
Any time you are talking to a girl, whether you are sexually interested or not, try to find something beautiful about her and express it. Maybe it is her smile, her body, her eyes or dress, or maybe it’s the way she laughs, her passion, her kindness, her gentle spirit.
There is beauty in everyone if we will just look, and the world would be a far better place if more people were able to see and acknowledge the beauty within every person with whom they interact.
3. A Boy Looks for What He Can Get a Man Looks for What He Can Share
The true difference between, a boy and a man is simply the focus they have.
A boy looks for what he can get; sex, money, prestige, status, fulfillment etc etc. a man, however, looks for what he can give. He comes into every interaction looking for ways to lift others up and to share himself, to make others feel beautiful and loved.
A man is content in himself and doesn’t need the validation of others. He is already full, and as a result he can pour out into others lives without holding back.
4. There is Great Beauty in Women if You Continue
Many guys have been screwed over by women. We have opened ourselves up and put ourselves on the line only to be burned and hurt.
After this, we became jaded and angry, stereotyping all women as mean and deceitful, failing to realize that like all other generalizations, one isolated incident does not account for a whole populations actions.
If you want to be successful with women and in life in general, you must realize that there is great beauty if you will just continue. Yes, there are women who are simply mean and hurtful, but the vast majority are beautiful creatures, incredible treasure chests of beauty just waiting for the right guy who can come along and unlock them.
So keep going, keep being authentic and keep searching for the beauty in all women and you will find it. Like the bible says (and this is applicable regardless of you religious beliefs or lack thereof) “Seek and you shall find, ask and it will be given, knock and the door will be opened. ”
Keep seeking, asking and knocking and you will find more satisfaction and deep intimacy than you ever thought possible.
5. It’s Not About the Move You Make Just That You Make a Move
Just make a move. Stop worrying about doing the right thing and just do something.
So many guys never have success in any area of their life because they are afraid of taking imperfect action, but what they fail to realize is that no action is perfect and the only way to be successful is to continually experiment, fail, learn, and experiment again.
Don’t be afraid to fail, be afraid not to try.
Rank #9: How to Use Science to Become the Man Women Want with Dr. Geoffrey Miller
Geoffrey F. Miller is an American evolutionary psychologist, serving as an associate professor of psychology at the University of New Mexico and known for his expertise in sexual selection in human evolution, and for his views on the evolution through sexual selection of the human brain as sexual ornamentation.
“There is very little difference between one man and another, but what little there is is very important” ~William JamesKey Points
1. One of the Keys to Success with Women is to Put Yourself in Their Shoes
If you want to become successful with women, it is imperative that you start by putting yourself in the woman’s shoes. Ask yourself what it is that she is truly looking for in a man, what are her concerns, what are her fears?
Women are far more physically vulnerable than men are and as such, becoming a man that women can feel safe around should be a priority when you begin your journey into the dating world.
Women are also worried about their social and economic status. What will it do to her reputation if she dates or sleeps with you? What will her friends think?
It’s questions like this that help you to understand what women are looking for and how you can better provide it. If you want to be successful with women, start by getting into their head.
2. Understand Mating Markets
This is a seemingly simple concept, but one of vital importance. If you want to succeed at fishing, go where the fish are!
Plain and simple, the only way you will get good with women is if you go where there are an abundance of women. Moving to a large city, a big, liberal college, or moving overseas to countries with high populations of beautiful women (eg Argentina and Brazil) will increase your chances of success in mating drastically.
3. Looks Matter Less than You Think
What science has shown us is that women value looks significantly less than they do certain mental and emotional traits. (with the exception of outliers, eg extremely overweight or a male model). What this means is that, no matter what numbers came up for you in the ovarian lottery, if you are an average guy, your success with women will be determined more by the qualities that you display than your looks.
4. Women want a Man with Potential
Women love to be along for the ride, they love to find men who are ambitious and hardworking, and be there with him when he has nothing and once he gets it all. Potential is one of the sexiest things to a woman.
In fact studies have shown that women would rather be with a failed entrepreneur, who put his neck on the line and tried to succeed, than they would with a trust fund baby who was rich but never worked for it.
What this means for you is that you don’t have to be perfect, you just have to show women that you have potential to be the man they’ve always wanted.
Rank #10: How to Attract Women as an Introvert With Sarah Jones
Sarah Jones is an online entrepreneur and dating coach for men who helps introverted men unleash the power inside of them to attract and date the beautiful women that they desire by expressing themselves openly and authentically, and avoiding the gimmicks of the PUA community.Favorite Success Quote
“Enjoy the hell out of being you”Key Points
1. Love Being You
The first step that is essential to becoming a powerful man who can authentically relate with and attract the women he desires is simply to love being you.
Love who you are!
Love your weirdness, your quirky traits, your dreams and goals, your hobbies, your flaws, and your strengths.
Many people suggest that loving yourself often causes people to steer away from personal development, but the opposite is actually true. If you genuinely love yourself and love who you are, what is the more loving thing to do?
To allow yourself to live a mediocre life held back by fear and doubt?
Or to break free and step into the life that you know you can achieve?
2. You Have to Live by Your Values to Truly Attract Women
One of the reasons that many shy guys fail with women whenever attempting “pick up” is that the techniques and tactics taught in the pickup community, even among those who encourage you to be authentic and genuinely relate, are often out of line with the values that you may hold being an introverted male.
If you value genuine conversation and connection and are then told that you have to go to loud bars and clubs start dry humping on the dance floor to attract girls, you will feel disingenuous and it will come across in your interactions.
3. Break the Touch Barrier Quickly
One of the ways that many introverts fail with women is that they are quickly “friend zoned” because they have a difficult time breaking the touch barrier. A woman will never see you in a sexual light if you are not able to comfortable touch her in a respectful way (and quickly)
This does not mean you have to be groping and grab assing, it simply means that being able to initiate a playful touch on the arm or shoulder, or placing your hand on her knee to emphasize a segment of a story you are telling, will go a long way in having her see you as a potential boyfriend and a not a potential friend to cry to when her boyfriend turns out to be an asshole.
4. Your Inner World will be Reflected In Your Approaches
Women have a sixth sense when it comes to how you are showing up in the world. If you are inwardly feeling unconfident, very unsure of yourself, and unworthy of the girl you are trying to spark attraction with. it will come across and she will be able to tell almost immediately.
You have to first develop the inner confidence and put yourself in situations where you can be yourself (for example if you love music, go join a music meet up instead of trying to force going out to night clubs and bars), and then you will be able to meet and attract women easily and naturally.
Rank #11: Why Comfort Will Ruin Your Life With Bill Eckstrom
William Eckstrom is the President and founder of the EcSell Institute. Bill has spent his entire career in the sales arena; the first 14 years in personal production and then 13 in various sales leadership roles.
His management career began in 2000 as a District Manager for a medical equipment company and was promoted to U.S. Director of Sales in 2003. In 2004, Bill was lured away to become Senior Vice President of Business Development for a publicly traded healthcare organization. In 2008, he founded the EcSell Institute to fill a void he witnessed and personally experienced in the sales leadershipFavorite Success Quote
“The constant facade of order hides the wilderness that is craving to seek out and teach us that life wasn’t created to be what we think it is. Beyond words we must experience the wilderness to be taught what otherwise cannot be known.” ~Dr. Serene JonesKey Points
1. We Only Grow in a State of Discomfort
We live in an age of unprecedented comfort.
Things are easier today in 2017 (or whenever you are reading this) than they have ever been before.
If we get hot, we turn up the AC. If we get bored, we open up YouTube. If we are hungry, we order a pizza.
Life is too darn easy!
And with this ease, has come a disease that is plaguing society.
The disease of stagnation.
The more comfortable you become, the less drive and ambition you have to grow, create, and build a better life for yourself.
The more comfortable you become, the easier it is to relegate your dreams, desires, and aspirations to the realm of “someday”.
Unless you are facing massive discomfort in your life, then odds are, you are slowly dying.
True growth, real, visceral growth is always predicated by discomfort.
If you are living a mediocre life and want to break free to achieve levels of success and happiness that you have been searching for for so long, then you must get uncomfortable.
It’s as simple as that.
It’s not pretty and it’s not easy… but it is the truth.
You need to actively seek out discomfort in your career, your personal growth, and your physical health.
If your job isn’t inspiring you, then find ways that you can take on new and uncomfortable responsibilities or quit.
If you are not growing as a man and becoming stronger and more grounded each and every day, then find mentors and friends inspire you to level up your game and quit playing it small.
If you are not constantly pushing the limits of your body and breaking through to new feats of strength, speed, and agility, then get your butt in the gym today and start sculpting yourself into a stronger man.
Gentlemen, if you are not growing you are dying.
It’s time to cut the crap and start living life.
And it all starts by stepping outside what is easy and embracing discomfort.
2. Focus on Yourself First
If you have ever been on an airplane, then you are well aware of the boring (and often ignored) safety briefings at the beginning of each flight.
But if you pay special attention during those briefings you will notice something interesting.
The flight attendants will always tell you that, in the event of a crash, you need to put the oxygen mask on yourself first before helping anyone around you, including your children.
And while this might sound selfish and downright barbaric to some of you, it comes with good reason.
If you black out on during the crash while trying to help someone else, then what have you accomplished?
You have likely killed yourself and sealed the other person’s fate as well.
And this lesson is applicable in all areas of life.
If you are not taking care of yourself, if you are not taking the time to grow yourself, mentally, spiritually, and professionally, then what use do you have to the rest of the world?
If you are so strung out on projects and problems that you can’t think straight and need a double shot of espresso and a line of cocaine just to function, do you really think that you will be able to be the man that you woman needs you to be? That your family needs you to be? That your friends need you to be?
Absolute selflessness is the ultimate selfishness.
It is only by taking care of yourself first that you can truly serve others.
If you want to truly serve your team, your loved ones, and your friends, then start by serving yourself.
Take time in solitude each day to meditate and be alone with your thoughts.
Take care of your health.
Take whatever time and resources are necessary to ensure that you can show up fully charged and alive.
Because when you are can unleash yourself on the world with power and energy, that’s when you can serve others and make the biggest impact.
3. Life Happens for You Not to You
Each and every day you have a choice.
You can choose to believe that the circumstances and the events in your life are happening to you.
Or you can choose to believe that they are happening for you.
When you believe that life happens to you, you disempower yourself, rob your life of meaning and purpose, and will get lost in the downward spiral of negativity.
But when you can expand your mind and embrace the belief that life is happening for you, you will begin to see lessons and opportunities where previously, there were only obstacles.
If Bill hadn’t been fired from his job, I would not be writing this article and would not have had the pleasure of interviewing him.
If I hadn’t quit corporate and endured the pain of sleeping on my brother’s couch and going broke to build this business, then I wouldn’t have been privileged to have the business and the impact that I have today.
Whatever situation you are facing in your life, whatever struggle you don’t believe you can overcome, choose to reframe it and see it as a gift from the universe.
See your pain as an opportunity to grow and become the man that you need to be so that you can truly achieve greatness when the time comes.
4.Realize that the Journey Never Ends
As you are reading or listening to this talk about discomfort, many of you might be thinking “When does this end? When can I sit back and relax and just enjoy all the comforts and ease life has to offer?”
The honest answer?
When you are dead.
You see, life is a journey.
And while you are on that journey, you are either growing or dying.
It doesn’t matter how old you are, how accomplished you are, or how much you have achieved, in every moment you can either choose growth or death.
If you look at the statistics you will see that a large number of retirees die shortly after they leave their jobs, businesses, and careers behind.
And this isn’t because of old age.
It’s because they were no longer growing. Because they no longer had a deeper purpose driving their lives.
So yes, you can embrace comfort and just coast through life.
Just be prepared for decades of unfulfilling drudgery and overwhelming emptiness.
However, if you are listening to this podcast, if you are actively seeking out information that will help you grow to become the man you were born to be, then I would guess that you have no interest in coasting.
And if this is true, then you need to embrace discomfort.
Embrace the fact that until the day you die, you will never arrive, you will never be done, and the journey will never end.
Life is nothing more than a continual set of problems for which you are tasked to find the solution.
If you do it right, these problems will grow in size and magnitude as you grow.
But they will never end.
Embrace the journey and get excited about discomfort.
5. Focus on Your Passions
There has never been a time in human history where it was easier or more important to find and follow your passion.
With the power of the internet, you have the opportunity and the responsibility to find what you love and unleash it on the world.
It’s time to start living your life and stop living someone else’s.
Find what you love doing and go do that!
Stop squandering your time pursuing dreams and goals set by other people and start doing what you were meant to do.
If you get nothing else from this interview, get this.
You are meant to do so much more than you can imagine. But to do this, you must embrace discomfort and follow your passions no matter what the cost.
Rank #12: How to Master Your Social Life By Mastering the Art of Authentic Relations with Jeffrey Platts
Jeffrey Platts is passionate about helping men design and live that has them feeling fully alive. He’s obsessed with finding out what keeps people from being their most authentic. Which is actually what is most attractive. Not just physically. Professionally, financially, emotionally, sexually, socially, spiritually.
Jeffrey Platts is a men’s life and love coach with a background in salsa dancing, world traveling and yoga instruction.Favorite Success Quote
“Whatever I think the world is withholding from me, I am withholding from the world”~Eckhart Tolle
“The cave you fear to enter contains the treasure you seek”~Joseph CampbellKey Points
1. If You Want External Change, You Have to Start Internally
On the road to success, in whatever field, be it financially, socially, physically, or emotionally, the change starts inside. No change will happen in your external world without first taking the time to do the deep internal work of finding your why, crushing mental barriers, and setting a clear vision just to name a few.
You need to realize that if you want to see success, you have to work from the inside out and be willing to put in the time and effort on yourself before you will see the results that you are looking for.
2. Your Identity Determines Your Outcomes
Often times, when individuals try to change, a huge stumbling block that they run into is that the identity that they have held for years is incongruent with the new path that they are on.
If you have told yourself that you are a smoker for nearly 20 years, you will find it hard to quit smoking because that habit is so tied up in your identity. Therefor, if you want to make any sort of appreciable changes in your life, part of the inner work you need to start with is developing a new positive identity in yourself.
Develop an identity of a man who is disciplined, who is hardworking, who is innovative, who is smart, who is whatever you want to be. Only when your identity is aligned with your goals will you begin to achieve them.
3. Comparison Will Kill Your Dreams
The fastest way to live a miserable, unhappy life is to constantly be in comparison. Guess what, someone will always be richer than you, better looking than you, have a better family than you, date more attractive women than you, and drive a faster car than you.
But that is completely irrelevant.
All that matters is that you are competing with yourself. Are you living up to your full potential within the circumstances that you were given going after the goals you have set? Other people are born with different assets and skills than you and often had successes that came from hardships you would never wish upon your worst enemy.
Learn to congratulate others on their successes without being threatened by them. As the old clique goes, “The only person you need to be better than is the person you were yesterday.”
4. Be Who You Want to be Unapologetically
In society, we are all encouraged to fit in. So fill the social mold and to do what everyone else is doing. This leaves very little room for authenticity and a life on your terms.
Just be who you are unapologetically and don’t worry about what society thinks. Do you love salsa dancing and yoga? Who cares that society sees this as less manly than MMA and Crossfit! Do you want to commit to a loving and monogamous marriage? Who cares that society will tell you that you are less of a man for sleeping with fewer women.
Be who you are and who you want to be completely and without apology.
Rank #13: How to Overcome #Loneliness and Achieve a Fulfilling Life With Tony Selimi
Internationally renowned human emotion, connection, and cognition expert Tony Selimi is a coach and the author of #Loneliness and A Path to Wisdom. He is currently traveling the world, sharing his message of transformation and connection.Favorite Success Quote
“I embrace equally both support and challenge” ~Dr. John DeMartiniKey Points
1. You Must Embrace Both Sides of Life
Life is not comprised of just the good or just the bad.
It is a beautiful dichotomous dance that blends together both exuberant highs and devastating lows meant to mold us, change us, and teach us.
While modern pop psychology gurus would have you believe that you should ignore any pain and struggle in your life and simply live in a state of constant and never ending euphoria, the simple truth is that life is beautiful because of the pain and struggles that we face.
Without the pain of discipline, there would be no joy in success.
Without the hurt of loss, there would be no satisfaction in gain.
Life requires the good and the bad to play out like the masterfully written movie that it is, and the sooner you learn to embrace both sides of life, the sooner you will be able to live up to your true potential.
2. Loneliness Affects Every Area of Your Life
Often times, as men, we revel in the concept of solidarity.
We love the thought of being the lone wolf, outnumbered and against the world achieving greatness all by his own accord.
And nothing could be more damaging or destructive to our overall health and well-being.
Whenever you live your life out of communion with others, whenever you lack strong bonds and friendships, and whenever you isolate yourself from the world, you are not only damaging your psyche, but your physical well-being and genetic expression as well.
Loneliness has been shown to cause disease, mental illness, and even alter your genes in a very real and powerful way.
There is nothing manly about depression and sickness, so quit trying to go it alone and invest into your social life.
3. Place Yourself in the Right Environments
An interesting phenomenon that can occur in our modern world is that men can be surrounded by friends but still feel lonely if the activities and conversations with those friends are incongruent with your personal values and desires.
For example, let’s say that you hate sports.
You couldn’t care less about the NFL or NHL or any other sports league.
And yet, one of your social circle’s favorite activities is to sit down together at the local bar, have a few beers, and watch the game.
Even though all of the men in the circle are fantastic influences and valuable friends, taking part in this activity will actually increase your feelings of isolation and loneliness.
This makes it essential that you start becoming more intentional about the activities you indulge in and the things that you do with your peers.
Rank #14: Why Positive Thinking will Not Change Your Life and What to Do Instead With David Essel
Master Business, Relationship, and Success Coach, TV/Radio Host, Author of 9 Books, Inspirational Speaker David began his career in the health and fitness industry and quickly was named “Mr. Motivation” by Lifetime Television and “The Master of Motivation” by American Fitness magazine.Favorite Success Quote
“Every action into the uncomfortable ensures our success in life”Key Points
1. You Have to become Uncomfortable
Life is not lived within your comfort zone.
If you want to achieve success, you cannot sit on your couch and visualize it, you have to get up off your butt and go after it.
Want to get shredded?
Get yourself to the gym, lift weights, and track your diet.
Want to make more money?
Work 80 hours a week intentionally on your business for 90 days and see what your results are.
The only way to succeed is to do the things that are uncomfrotable and painful.
2. We Cannot Live for Instant Gratification
If you are living for instant gratification, you will never acheive fulfillment.
You must learn to delay gratification, giving up what you want now for what you ultimately want.
It might not be fun to wake up early and workout or miss partying with friends to grind it out on your business, but you will thank yourself in the years to come.
3. The Path to Success Rarely Feels Good
Success can suck.
It’s just that simple.
Getting up early isn’t fun.
Working 12 hour days isn’t fun.
Cutting off unhealthy friendships isn’t fun.
But it is worth it.
Success requires you to be in pain, it is that simple.
The sooner you accept that, the easier the pain will be.
4. What You Think About You Do Not Bring About
Thinking about something day after day does nothing to move you closer to its attainment.
If you want something, then go and get it.
Don’t wish for it or visualize it, GO AND GET IT!
Work for it.
Sweat, cry, and bleed for it.
Then and only then can you truly acheive the things that you want.
5. Success in 80% Action 20% Mentality
For all of this talk bashing the law of attraction and visualization, the principles behind the psycholgy of success do have some merit.
If you want to boost the speed with which you achieve success, then using visualization techniques, affirmations, and other pop psychology tactics work when used in conjunction with massive action.
Your goal should be to devote 80% of your time to taking action and 20% of your time to mastering your psychology.
Rank #15: Embrace the Pain, Be Relentless and Achieve True Greatness With Brandon Carter
Brandon Carter has been one of the top personal trainers and nutritionists in North America for over 10 years. He has worked as a fitness model for Nike, Puma, Adidas, Men’s Health, and many others.
Brandon has trained a number of professional athletes and models.
Brandon is the author of the #1 best-selling ebook “Ultimate Cuts: 7 Secrets To Burn Fast As Hell” among several others.Favorite Success Quote
“Your approval or disapproval means nothing to me” ~JesusKey Points
1. Consistency is the Key to All Success
Most successful people are not successful because of genetics, luck, or inheritance.
They are successful because they just didn’t give up.
No matter how hard it got, no matter what challenges arose, they never gave up, never surrendered, and kept pushing forward to achieve the life of their dreams.
Tony Robbins has an old saying that “You overestimate what you can do in a year but underestimate what you can do in two or three decades.”
And the simple truth is that most people die unsuccessful and unfulfilled because they were not willing to power through the decades of struggle to become successful.
If you want to succeed, then don’t quit.
Plain and simple.
2. There is No Failure Simply Data
In life, there is no failure, there is just input and data.
Imagine that you go up to a beautiful woman to try and get her number.
In your approach, you lack confidence, your voice cracks, you can’t hold eye contact, and after mumbling inaudibly for about two minutes, she curtly tells you that she is not interested.
Is this a failure?
No, it is simply data about what doesn’t work.
Now, you know that the next time you go to approach a beautiful girl, you need to stand with confidence, project your voice, hold eye contact, and portray the fact that you are a strong grounded man.
The same is true in business and in health.
Even if you lose millions of dollars, it’s not a failure, it’s simply data that will inform your decisions in the future.
If you waste two years with the same low-level exercise program without seeing results, you have not failed, you have simply gathered data about what doesn’t work.
3. Master Your Craft
If you want to be remembered as one of the greats, then you must become a master of your craft, not just a dabbler.
True masters are the people who are willing to devote their lives to mastering one or two specific crafts.
According to Malcolm Gladwell it takes 10,000 hours to become a true master of any craft.
This means that if you want to truly master a craft it will take you at least a decade of committed work to truly become one of the greats.
But this should not be something that is discouraging.
Because of the high barrier to entry the competition that you will face on your path to mastery will be nominal.
There are so few people who are actually willing to pay the price for mastery, that the rewards for becoming a master are so incredible.
4. You Will Have to Bleed for What You Want
If you want to succeed, you are going to have to bleed.
End of story.
Whenever you are setting new goals for yourself, do not ask yourself what you want to achieve, ask yourself what you are willing to suffer for.
Almost everyone wants a million dollars, the house in the hills, the fast cars, and the beautiful woman.
But how many people are actually willing to bleed for what they want?
How many people are willing to sacrifice and suffer to achieve their goals?
If you want to achieve great things you will need to sacrifice greatly.
So before you set out to achieve your goals ask yourself if you are truly willing to pay the price required to achieve your goals.
5. You Need to be Relentless
Greatness requires sacrifice, we have already said as much.
But to become the best you must be relentless.
This is a whole new level of sacrifice.
Fighting your way to the top means that you are going to have to give up time with friends and family, it means that you are going to have to leave relationships, it means that you are going to have to give up sleep, give up partying, and give up damn near everything except for your pursuit of greatness.
You have to be relentless.
You have to be like Jordan and Kobe.
You have to show up early, leave late, and shut everything out except for your purpose.
Becoming the best in the world is not a path for the faint of heart, but if you decide to embark upon it, then you need to realize what it is going to cost.
Rank #16: Transform Your Body to Live a Legendary Life With Ted Ryce
Personal trainer, peak performance coach, and podcaster Ted Ryce has overcome a tremendous amount in his quest to live a legendary life.
Ryce has worked with Fortune 500 CEOs, busy professionals, and celebrities, including Richard Branson, Ricky Martin and Robert Downey Jr. He helps his clients develop and stick with high-performance habits that help them manage stress and adversity and lead more successful lives.
His philosophy is that being a high-performance person, one who chases and achieves their biggest goals, isn’t a luxury, it’s a necessity to survive and thrive in the modern world.Favorite Success Quote
“Don’t ask yourself what the world needs, ask yourself what makes you come alive and go do that. Because what the world needs is more people to come alive” ~Howard ThurmanKey Points
1. You Need to Come Alive
The world is full of people who are dead on the inside.
They are living and breathing in the literal sense, but their lives lack the passion.
They wake up in the morning with no fire in their bellies. They simply go through the motions, doing things that they dislike because of societal conditioning.
What the world needs, what you need, is to come alive.
To live a life every day that is of your choosing, doing things that you love and spending every day of your life living with deep passion.
Forget what society and your parents taught you. You need to do what will make you come alive, period.
2. You Need to Push Yourself Physically to Succeed at Life
Your health is a critical part of succeeding at life.
If you are not pushing yourself physically in the gym and challenging your body on a daily basis, then you are doing a disservice to your career, your family, and your personal growth.
Whenever you push yourself in the gym, you can push yourself harder in life.
You wake up with more energy and can live life on a level 10.
3. Consistency is Key
You will never have the body of your dreams, the woman of your dreams, or the millions in the bank account if you are not consistent.
You need to be consistent.
Set a plan and stick to it.
Don’t make excuses, don’t allow life to get in the way.
As Nike says, “Just do it!”
4. You Need More Experiences
If you are feeling lost in life, you need to experience more things.
Pack up your bags and travel around the world. Move to a new city. Try out a new career.
Do whatever you have to do to give yourself more experiences and grow into the man that you want to become.
5. Life is a Marathon
Life is not a a sprint, it is a marathon.
You cannot expect to achieve all of your goals and dreams within a year.
It takes decades of dedication and consistency.
And even then you will never truly arrive at any sort of destination.
Life is a never ending journey.
You will never arrive, and that is ok.
6. Training Routine to Build Strength
If you are looking to build strength and become (literally) the strongest version of yourself.
Follow the below routine.
Workout 4 Days a Week
Monday: Upper Body Tuesday: Lower Body Wednesday: Rest Thursday: Upper Body Friday: Lower Body Weekend: Rest
For exercise selection, stick to big lifts.
Deadlifts, squats, bench press, and overhead presses should comprise the majority of your workout.
Pick 2 based on the training day, for example, if you are doing upper body, complete Bench Press, and Shoulder Presses.
Then pick 2-3 supplementary exercises of your choice that are in the same muscle groups to compliment your workout.
Sets and Reps
Month 1: 4 sets of 12-15 Month 2: 4 sets of 6-8 (higher weight) Month 3: 4 sets of 4-5 (higher weight)
Week 1: 4 sets of 6 Week 2: 4 sets of 8 Week 3: 5 sets of 8 Week 4: Deload (Same sets and reps as week 1 with 30-40% less weight)
An Added Note
The most important part of any training program is called linear periodization.
This is the concept of basically incrementally increasing the weight that you are pressing or pulling to continue forcing your body to grow and adapt.
Always seek to add one more rep, just a little bit more weight, or another set to your workouts so that you are continually improving and pushing your body.
7. Bonus Routine for Fat Burning
An easy trick to help you burn some extra fat is to complete the following workouts either on your off days or as a finisher to your workouts.
Week 1: 5 Minutes of Bodyweight squats in aerobic heart rate range (or some other bodyweight exercise) Week 2: 10 Minutes of Bodyweight squats in aerobic heart rate range (or some other bodyweight exercise) Week 3: 15 Minutes of Bodyweight squats in aerobic heart rate range (or some other bodyweight exercise) Week 4: 8 Minutes of Bodyweight squats in aerobic heart rate range (or some other bodyweight exercise)
8. Sleep Better
Here are a few tips to help you improve the quality of your sleep.
-Download the app F.lux to dim the lights on your computer so that don’t disrupt your natural sleep cycle.
-Invest in a sleep master mask (or just cover your face with a shirt)
-Invest in a nicer mattress
– Set your thermostat to 64 degrees F
-Get ear plugs for noisy environments
-Get to bed at the same time every night, preferably before 11 p.m.
Rank #17: Embrace Your Shadow, Find Your Purpose, and Become the Man You Were Meant to Be with Craig Filek
Craig Filek is a father, a depth coach and highly attuned facilitator bringing over 20 years of experience in transformative men’s work, shadow work and authentic relating to his unique process for radically clarifying your purpose, making a powerful contribution, and stepping into your flowFavorite Success Quote
“In every adversity lies the seed in an equivalent or greater benefit”~Napoleon HillKey Points
1. Learn to Be With Yourself
Part of becoming the man that you were born to be is to discover who you are and to learn to be ok with your shadow, unafraid and bold in accepting who you are.
To achieve this level of self knowledge and acceptance, you have to be willing to spend time in solitude truly delving into yourself and allowing yourself the space to grow.
Whether this is through meditation, time in nature or journaling doesn’t matter. What matters is that you make time for yourself to be alone with yourself and truly come to know and accept who you are.
2. You Have to Have a Rite of Passage to Become the Best Man You Can Be
To truly thrive as a man, you must, even according to your own biology, go through a rite of passage that challenges you and leaves you a better man than before.
Whether this is a retreat, solo trip around the world, starting a business, or competing in a boxing match, you need to have something that marks your transition into manhood and a new life, no matter how old or experienced you are.
3. Create a Life Map
A powerful exercise to help you unlock your potential and become the man you need to be is to create a life map. Include your overarching purpose for the next 6 years, milestones along the way to help keep you motivated and on track, a daily one thing to focus on, and a list of daily habits to help you become the man you were born to be.
No matter whether your purpose is to become the biggest name in personal growth, a pro musician, or simply to be the best damn father you can, breaking everything down in this way will help you to organize your life and goals in a simple way that you can easily follow and use to achieve your purpose.
Rank #18: Life Lessons from a NY Times Best Selling Author With Tucker Max
Tucker Max received his BA from the University of Chicago in 1998, and his JD from Duke Law School in 2001. He even attended Duke Law School on an academic scholarship, where he neglected to buy any of his textbooks for his final two years and spent part of one semester–while still enrolled in classes–living in Cancun.
His first book, I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell, is a #1 New York Times Best Seller, spent five years on the list, and has over 2 million copies in print. His second book, Assholes Finish First, and his third book,Hilarity Ensues, are also NY Times Best Sellers.
He co-wrote and produced the movie based on his life/book, also titled “I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell.” He has also been credited with being the originator and leader of a new literary genre, “fratire,” is only the third writer (after Malcolm Gladwell and Michael Lewis) to ever have three books on the NY Times Nonfiction Best Seller List at one time, and was nominated to the Time Magazine 100 Most Influential List in 2009. He currently lives in Austin, Texas.Favorite Success Quote
“Every day write down one example of you working your process and one example of how you are making your life about other people”Key Points
1. Life is Not Complicated but it is Difficult
Many people like to make life seem more complicated than it really is. In reality, life is simple, but it is hard as hell and it boils down to two things:
-The relationships you have with the people that you love
-The work you do
If you can master the relationships in your life and you can do work every day that you find personally fulfilling, allows you to have freedom, and adds value to others, than you are about as successful as they come.
2. The Best Way to Make Money is to Help People
If you want to be rich, then you have to help a lot of people. Making money is all about the art of problem solving and helping others improve their lives in a way that they cannot wait to pay you.
Everyone is in pain and everyone is struggling with something in their lives, no matter how rich, good looking, or successful they are, and if you can find that thing and offer them a solution that genuinely works, you will be able to make more money than you ever imagined.
3. Achieving External Success Alone is Unfulfilling
In the interview Tucker talked about how he had all of the external trappings of success. Millions of dollars in income, meet and sleeping with countless beautiful women, a healthy body, and a great career, but still found it ultimately unfulfilling, because he had not done the work on himself.
No matter how much you achieve in your life, if you do not work on yourself and if you do not take care of your emotions and inner world, no amount of outward success will leave you fulfilled.
4. Knowing Is Not Enough
If everyone in the world acted on what they knew, we would live in a society where everyone was happy, healthy, wealthy, and wise.
Think about it…
Everyone knows that to be healthy you should move more and eat less. Everyone knows to be wealthy you should work hard and smart, and spend less than you make. Everyone knows to be wise you should read more and be around smarter people.
So why the hell don’t people do this?
They have an action problem, not a knowledge problem. If you want to succeed in life, you have to take the action, knowing is not half of the battle, it’s about 10% and massive effing action is the other 90%.
5. You Make Your Own Purpose
Many people have been sold a lie that they have to go on this mystical journey to find their purpose. That if they go and meditate in a dark cave a ball of light will come down from the heavens to reveal to them what they need to do.
This is pure bullshit.
If you are struggling to find a purpose it is because you don’t find a purpose you make one!
Pick something that you enjoy and are good at that will allow you to maximize your relationships with the people you love and serve the world, and you have successfully found a purpose worth living for.
Like we said earlier, this is quite simple, but not easy.
But it is also worth it.