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You Look Nice Today

A Journal of Emotional Hygiene, staffed by lonelysandwich, scottsimpson, and hotdogsladies.

Ranked #1

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Episode 44: The Rules

Episode 44: The Rules

Hello, my friend! Welcome to my humble automobile dealership! Ah, yes. Very nice. I see you eyeing our all new 2013 Toy... Read more

2 Aug 2012

39mins

Ranked #2

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Episode 43: Gellies Local 416

Episode 43: Gellies Local 416

Thieving Threesome Nabbed (California) Three men were detained and arrested at a local Target today, charged with the at... Read more

2 Jul 2012

33mins

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Ranked #3

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Episode 42: Druthers, CA

Episode 42: Druthers, CA

Welcome to Druthers, CA! Here are some tips for making the most of your visit with us: • Yes. Keep checking your mailbox... Read more

2 Jun 2012

40mins

Ranked #4

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Episode 45: Morning Glory

Episode 45: Morning Glory

TO: Paul Polman, CEO Unilever PLC London, United Kingdom Dear Mr. Polman, I hope you can help me. You are in charge... Read more

2 Sep 2012

30mins

Most Popular Podcasts

Ranked #5

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Episode 9: Truck Spank

Episode 9: Truck Spank

So sorry!, the oxygen lobby, doin’ the Skokie, Wallet-on-Chain is not a town in England, Sean Connery is Japanese, What’... Read more

2 Jun 2008

37mins

Ranked #6

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Episode 36: Bubbles

Episode 36: Bubbles

Bankruptcy Liquidation Auction Beginning @ 9:00 AM-85 Herston Rd. Long Beach, CA Feb 8, 2010 Registration 7:30-10:00 A.M... Read more

9 Feb 2010

41mins

Ranked #7

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Episode 37: The Magic Number

Episode 37: The Magic Number

We went, with some friends, into the woods. A few days later we left the woods. Our memory of the time we spent in the w... Read more

19 May 2010

34mins

Ranked #8

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Episode 35: The Sake Period

Episode 35: The Sake Period

Subject: #1228743 “Mann” Application Date: September 4, 1980 Subject has submitted a new application to the Coolness Rev... Read more

4 Dec 2009

29mins

Ranked #9

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Episode 10: Early Bird

Episode 10: Early Bird

How do your socks feel about it?, a new kind of retail experience, Sandwich knows his Douglas Firs, Farewell to Tight (a... Read more

12 Jun 2008

41mins

Ranked #10

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Episode 40: Lobster Farm

Episode 40: Lobster Farm

We don’t know anyone who loves sushi more than we do. That’s because when we meet someone who loves sushi, we stop talki... Read more

2 Apr 2012

30mins

Ranked #11

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Episode 19: Man School

Episode 19: Man School

Now* accepting applications for the Class of 2016! Sample from our wide range of available courses, including Sociology ... Read more

30 Sep 2008

30mins

Ranked #12

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Episode 21: Mr. Owl

Episode 21: Mr. Owl

FIRST: Nose harmony, quarters, who’s Capote now?, “He plays you better than you play you,” layers of latex, latchkey ont... Read more

16 Oct 2008

45mins

Ranked #13

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Episode 17: Where Is the Ham?

Episode 17: Where Is the Ham?

Sandwich smiles into the mouthpiece, teenage telemarketing salad days, LonelyWear’s autumn line, the secret of our succe... Read more

9 Sep 2008

41mins

Ranked #14

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Episode 46: Poolside

Episode 46: Poolside

ATTENTION! POOL RULES! Free swim Thursdays 4:00 - 4:15. Shower before entering pool. Also, shave before entering pool. ... Read more

2 Oct 2012

36mins

Ranked #15

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Episode 18: Tang Tangs

Episode 18: Tang Tangs

The parenting of negligence, things you didn’t know about gas stations, ancient aphorisms, tethered to a key, you go in ... Read more

16 Sep 2008

29mins

Ranked #16

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Episode 13: Expressed as a Vest

Episode 13: Expressed as a Vest

Unhealthy ligatures, a course of Prednisone, “I’m not following you!”, obscure chess moves, smoking for the cure, misuse... Read more

8 Jul 2008

32mins

Ranked #17

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Episode 16: The Tux Age

Episode 16: The Tux Age

We’re back from summer break full of something and something. Expect weekly episodes until it’s time for fall break. Or ... Read more

2 Sep 2008

23mins

Ranked #18

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Episode 15: Rampant on a Field

Episode 15: Rampant on a Field

Down and out in Улаанбаатар (sorry, Mongolia!), remembrance of fights past, rampant on a field of Wheat Chex, stickin’ w... Read more

29 Jul 2008

35mins

Ranked #19

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Episode 33: Breakin' In

Episode 33: Breakin' In

While under the influence of y, we reveal that: Merlin once put x in an envelope. Scott hoped another guy’s x would dra... Read more

16 Sep 2009

43mins

Ranked #20

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Episode 22: Who Voted?

Episode 22: Who Voted?

Thousands* of you wrote to us asking for Election Day guidance. Sadly, we don’t have time to evaluate every candidate in... Read more

28 Oct 2008

36mins

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