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Still Trying

Leyla and Josh are still trying to figure it all out after 30: friendships, work life, mental health, dating, romance, and community building. All under the crushing gaze of late-stage capitalism.

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Still Trying - EP 22 (Featuring Peter Coffin) - Who’s Your Cultural Daddy(s) : Jordan Peterson vs. The Fab 5

In this corner we’ve got a meat eating, room cleaning, lobster loving daddy to incels everywhere, iiiiiiit’s JORDAN PETERSON. He’s got 12 Rules ready to take straight to the chins of his opponents.From the trend reviving, self-love preaching, French tuck sporting world of Netflix iiiiiiit’s QUEER EYE’S FAB FIVE!Now gentleman, I wanna see a clean fight with no patriarchy affirming or neoliberal, materialist success platitudes! And FIGHT!Round 1 - Josh explains his thesis on the growing cultural phenomenon of self-help and self-care for men as exhibited by Peterson and Queer Eye. What’s the good and bad to take away? Who should be your guide to navigate isolated, lonely men out of their mom’s basement, away from Fortnite, and into a healthy existence capable of joy?Round 2 - YouTube personality Peter Coffin (Many Peters, Very Important Documentaries, Adversaries) joins the conversation to add his thoughts on both of today’s subjects, modern masculinity, and agender identity. (Interview at approx. 35:00)Contact us: stilltryingbuds@gmail.comSupport the show: ko-fi.com/elstroproduction

1hr 25mins

24 Apr 2019

Rank #1

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EP 33 - One For The Parents

In case anyone was thinking that finding a lifelong partner and having a family with them means you’re done trying and have reached endless bliss and fairy tale endings, we decided we had a responsibility to burst that bubble. Enter our special guest, Josh’s sister, mother of two and wife, roommate of Maine Coon named Pete, and tiny one-bedroom Brooklyn apartment dweller Steph.Steph gets in the mix to tell us about what’s great about parenting and married life with a pretty measured take… that also talks about what sucks. Are you surprised to find that on this show we’d bring on someone who thinks Capitalism is the problem with parenting? Listen and find out why!Support the show: ko-fi.com/elstroproductionEmail us: stilltryingbuds@gmail.com

1hr 8mins

24 Oct 2019

Rank #2

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EP 35 - #FartGate EXPOSED!

Who really farted on the mic? Eric Swallwell? Chris Matthews? Or was it a squeaky chair? And where is Ghislaine Maxwell!?!?! AND WHO IS DEEP THROAT?!We’ll solve none of this because we have more important things to do like critique very lengthy Ok Cupid profiles. Also, join us for a deep meta-analysis of our own previous episode… It sounds stupid but it’s worth it. The conversation evolves into some really insightful mental health discussion and advice.Support the show: ko-fi.com/elstroproductionEmail us: stilltryingbuds@gmail.com

1hr 1min

22 Nov 2019

Rank #3

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Still Trying - EP 16 - Life Integration Strategies for Efficient Relationships and Maximized Emotional ROI

You’ll be like Neo seeing the code in the Matrix after this one baby! Romance, dating, love, are all just transactions in the marketplace of ideas! Your emotions, your feelings, your hopes, your dreams; they’re all just products waiting to be bought and sold to and by the holders of the most impressive personality resumes. Oh, and billionaires. They’re DEFINITELY taking their cut.We’re going to tackle socializing and befriending Normies when you’re an elitist brat. It’s also our first foray into the quirky world of dating app Hinge. Finally we’ll Ask a Fuck Up. Reading series returns with Brandy Jensen’s (@BrandyLJensen) advice column from theoutline.com: I’m Still in Therapy. Should I be Dating? The answer is C. Definitely C.


28 Jan 2019

Rank #4

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EP 36 - Mid Level Marketing Madness

Leyla was gracious enough to open up about her experience in a cult… er… pyramid scheme, uh… I mean “money making opportunity”. We hear Leyla’s story and discuss the means by which such companies prey on loneliness, especially in women. So Join Us In Creating Energy and GET FIRED UP!!Support the Show: ko-fi.com/elstroproductionEmail us: stilltryingbuds@gmail.com

1hr 17mins

30 Dec 2019

Rank #5

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EP 32 - Starring Ellen Degeneres as JOKER

Very minor spoilers in this episode for Joker, Season 2 of Grey’s Anatomy, and the awful class solidarity fo the ultra wealthy.Folks. It’s time to get a little weird. Get a little twisted. True PSYCHOS know the new movie Joker is a dangerous trigger waiting to ignite a sleeper Incel …uhh… cell to come online and shoot up every movie theater in America. This is the end. This is what women MADE these men do and the media wants you to know that. But more importantly they want you to be scared. Fear for your lives as you sit down with your Cookie Pizza from Pizza Hut (TM) to enjoy what you thought was going to be a light romp about costumed men battling each other in duels of good and evil.Actually, Josh saw Joker and it has nothing to do with any of that. We’re here to debunk this ridiculous Incel fear mongering over a movie being perpetuated by a blood thirsty media. We also find time to make a bet on who Leyla won’t text between now and our next episode.Place your bets on Leyla’s love life: ko-fi.com/elstroproductionEmail us: stilltryingbuds@gmail.com


10 Oct 2019

Rank #6

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Still Trying - EP 19 - Unpacking "A Girl Who Takes Herself Too Seriously"

Leyla’s ready to go OFF on some guys who need to rethink what they’re looking for in women. And yeah, they kind of deserve it.Most of this episode we’re devoting to a couple pieces of dating media we came across these past few weeks. First up, new Netflix original series Dating Around. Five singles. One… uh… singleton? Who comes out making us want to be their friend? And who is a douche who deserves to get sent back to Staten Island?We’ll also put our feet in our respective mouths discussing a recent project by The Cut entitled Beyond “The One” - Exploring Modern Polyamory. This time it seems we’re not the only ones who see the potentially fatal flaws in the lifestyle. But hey, we’re sincerely trying to work through this stuff in good faith. If we’re coming up short, get at us.Email: stilltryingbuds@gmail.comSupport the show: ko-fi.com/elstroproduciton


11 Mar 2019

Rank #7

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Still Trying - EP 12 - History of Western Lit

SEX! Now that we have your attention!Ugh… That was cheap. But for real. Let’s talk about it. When should we do that? When’s it okay? When’s it not okay? (Hint: Most ways the Catholics are doing it, not okay). A simple discussion of when it feels right to get down with a new partner, somehow descends into an exploration of the history of Catholicism and male power and control of the means of reproduction. Leyla name drops em’ all trying to confuse Josh: Mary Wolstencraft, Dickens, Hawthorne. They’re all coming for your sexual stigmas and vulnerabilities.Leyla also has some deeply set childhood trauma from, you guessed it, “Meet the Parents”. No… Not meeting someones parents. The 2000 motion picture comedy, starring Ben Stiller and Robert De Niro of course. And finally, what to do when your date is pregnant. As usual, Reddit has answers.


3 Dec 2018

Rank #8

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Still Trying - EP 31 - Men Are Dirtbags, Women Are Fleabags (It's Science)

Trigger Warning: This episode discusses a bizarre and uncomfortable form of sexual assault.Congrats to Phoebe Waller-Bridge for winning some Emmy’s for her performance in Fleabag …which in turn gives a chance to discuss and critique it’s takes on relationships. We’ll explore it’s relevance to women vs. men and reflect on what it says about us. And is the whole 4th wall breaking, omniscient narrator thing trope played out in the “golden age of television”?In this episode, we’ll also go meta on what it means for us to complain about the attention economy while actively participating in it. And do we want partners who feed us that same kind of attention we seek in our media work? Do we want a partner? Or another fan?Finally, there’s that whole reddit/relationship_advice post about um, virginity checking. If you’ve ever been on that board, you know what we’re talking about… Yikes.Email us: stilltryingbuds@gmail.comSupport the show: ko-fi.com/elstroproduction


25 Sep 2019

Rank #9

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Still Trying - EP 24 - Ode to the 'Wife Guy'

On this Memorial Day we remember the fallen. That’s right, #MeltdownMay 2019 is dedicated to all the Wife Guys out there who have so savagely embarrassed themselves and their (often ex) wives in the court of public opinion. Are you totally lost reading this? That’s fine. Josh explains the beautiful social experiment turned works of art that is a “wife guy” through the lens of fallen from grace YouTuber, Pro Jared, his very public, very awkward divorce and subsequently leaked dick-pics. Yikes.Leyla also brings us a lil’ reading series Jr. with the Wall Street Journal’s The Art of Being Single by Elizabeth Bernstein. When has one mastered said art? Where is the culture of self-love headed if left unchecked? And finally, a quick revisiting of our ongoing debate: to birth or not to birth. We check in with and discuss some thoughts those no-goodnick socialists over at Chapo Trap House recently had on the subject.Email: stilltryingbuds@gmail.comSupport the show: ko-fi.com/elstroproduction


28 May 2019

Rank #10

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EP 34 - Just Say Hello To The Pregnant Woman!!

The ways you’re supposed to deal with anxiety are bizarre and seemingly stupid. But it really is that hard to say hello to a pregnant woman on the street for some of us. Let’s dissect that. Leyla’s scheduled to reconnect with someone from her past to see if she can empty some baggage. Most importantly this episode is part birthday present for “Rebecca”… which doesn’t mean anything to you until you listen to the episode.Watch Rebecca’s birthday presentSupport the show: ko-fi.com/elstroproductionEmail us: stilltryingbuds@gmail.comEpstein didn’t kill himself.

1hr 11mins

7 Nov 2019

Rank #11

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Still Trying - EP 14 - A Very Soft Pants New Year

New year! New y- No. Not really. Nothing will change, so just put on your soft pants, listen to our podcast, and watch cartoons. Do you really want to be a part of the hedonist mob vomiting and crying in the streets as the clock strikes midnight and society tells you to instantly be horny or die alone? Hell no. Leave that to the “cool kids”, whose approval you’ll never get. So why bother?We’ll discuss why we impart so much importance on the being with someone as we witness the changing of a calendar. Also, how does our constant seeking of approval affect our self-esteem, our self-worth, and our ability to be loved? So again, forget the parties. Get deep with your pals Josh and Leyla for New Years!What horrors have you endured seeking love because New Years made you feel compelled?stilltryingbuds@gmail.com


31 Dec 2018

Rank #12

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Still Trying - EP 26 - The Handmaid's Tale Themed B-Day Party of Which We Do Not Speak

Reality TV is here to rectify the way we perceive relationships for us without us knowing. And we’re so here for it. Josh has fallen in love with the Bachelorette… the show. Not Hannah Brown herself. Although who could blame him if he did? It’s cultural conditioning. But in all seriousness, Josh takes to his critical media theory corner going to bat for the series as a work of modern art that teaches us about ourselves.We’ll also debate the use of the term “Emotional Labor” in correlation with romantic relationships vs. the work place. Is it owed scare quotes? Or is it a fair assessment of negativity in a relationship?And one more thing. We’ve revolutionized the way you’re going to find that special someone. And it doesn’t even require you to pull out your phone. We’re calling it Soft Eyes and we just know you’re going to love it. And even better, we’re making it available in your local bar, TODAY.Email: stilltryingbuds@gmail.comSupport the show: ko-fi.com/elstroproduction


26 Jun 2019

Rank #13

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Still Trying - EP 21 - "Treat Yo Self" Mentality Has Us Hugging Toilet Bowls

On today’s episode, our hosts’ thirst is being quenched by Topo Chico! The best of all mineral waters.Are you also getting just a little bit tired of trying to find a welcoming social space that doesn’t involve booze? Then you just might be “Sober Curious”. We explore this creeping trend, it’s merits, and the difficulties exploring sobriety fuels in the dating culture and socializing market. That market wants you to drink. It NEEDS you drink. It’s built it’s entire brand and profit model on your addiction to alcohol. So whaddaya’ gonna do? Give in? Opt Out? Fight back? Drink an ice cold Topo Chico instead? (We recommend the latter)This episode includes another installment in our reading series: From The Atlantic we explore Millenials Are Drinking Less-But Still Not Sober by Amanda MullEmail us: stilltryingbuds@gmail.comSupport the show: lo-fi.com/elstroproductionDrink Topo Chico.

1hr 3mins

8 Apr 2019

Rank #14

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Still Trying - EP 28 - Here's To a Year of Trying!

It’s been a year of airing out our personal lives for you all while mining the news and culture for understanding why developing relationships is so damn hard. What have we learned?Uhhh….Plenty! We’ll revisit some of our favorite moments and personal revelations from the past year and explore thoughts on where we can take things in the next year! Other topics include why you’re getting a lil’ depressed and discouraged at the height of summer and explore a recently updated study from Stanford University - Disintermediating Your Friends. Or normal speak, how the heck have hetero couples been meeting their partners? Find more here from The Guardian.Email us: stilltryingbuds@gmail.comSupport the show: ko-fi.com/elstroproduction


24 Jul 2019

Rank #15