When you're in a survival mode, you're decentralized & preemptive while suppressing all other non-essential parts of you. When healed, these parts come online with their own energy & need, requiring you to become more centralized in how you interpret need & meet those needs.

Part of post-healing is to examine the images & visions that provided motivation. For me it meant that they expired bc they were part of the old conditioning of adapting to the status quo for survival bc of shame. So I'm in a liminality where creating space is very painful bc I have to connect to everything that was blocked before.

No one prepares you for what healing actually entails: disconnecting from the filters & contexts that automated living for you. You're now forced to immerse yourself in existence, & to feel the tension of that complexity. Post-healing is like the ashaabul kahf who woke up after 300+ years when their reality framework had expired.

I'm thinking about trauma as our sun dying and that death destroying how planets & life functions. And how healing is to discover an internal sun but then discovering that you can't go back to your old timeline, to society with that much energy. You have to get rid of yourself to be accepted. So now I'm in a space of being stranded. How do I form a new context for myself?

There are missing pieces connecting the mental health crisis, ecological destruction & hyperconsumerism. Any attempts at solving these problems in their vacuum only works to suppress & further fragment our collective psyche. Will we stop this runaway train in time?

I analyze the soul urge that made me pull the plug on the machine & some of the worrying patterns emerging on platforms like Twitter, changing us without our awareness.

The defining feature of this world is rupture & it's a reset that contrasts illusion &truth, what's superficial & what's enduring. Rupture signals the inherent limitations of this world. When we reject it we might start to personalize the limitations as being indications of our own insufficiencies. We try to overcompensate but we're always interrupted nevertheless

I talk about what a month of following resonance and doing things that pushed my bandwidth while trying to retain my pace entailed. Ambition aint shit. Healing is anti-urgency. Compassion is the root of healthy movement.

We agree to play the role of being a cardboard cutout for the fantasy of someone else in exchange for having a predictable and steady stream of being needed. We seek out a leverage to stave off uncertainty about our safety and we think recognition is the only form of love available to us.

Being caught up in a threatening torrent of Western onslaught on the continent has shifted the focus from the collective intelligence approach that defines African cultures, to an overstatement of materialism as the only means of surviving. Many have lost the ability to identify and extract the innate meaning in our cultures, judging the absence of hyperintellectualism and written language as an absence of intelligence.