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Society & Culture

Not The Mama

Updated 23 days ago

Society & Culture
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The Not-Parenthood Pod - Chats about parenthood as a choice, how to better connect to friends and fam with kids and the politics of not-parenthood.

Read more

The Not-Parenthood Pod - Chats about parenthood as a choice, how to better connect to friends and fam with kids and the politics of not-parenthood.

iTunes Ratings

59 Ratings
Average Ratings
52
2
2
2
1

Original

By IrishJoe34 - Aug 04 2018
Read more
Love this podcast! I’m a dad and I’m into it so that shows it’s for everyone!!!

Incredible Podcast

By YasTween - Jul 23 2018
Read more
Listen to this pod!! I love it

iTunes Ratings

59 Ratings
Average Ratings
52
2
2
2
1

Original

By IrishJoe34 - Aug 04 2018
Read more
Love this podcast! I’m a dad and I’m into it so that shows it’s for everyone!!!

Incredible Podcast

By YasTween - Jul 23 2018
Read more
Listen to this pod!! I love it
Cover image of Not The Mama

Not The Mama

Latest release on Sep 13, 2019

Read more

The Not-Parenthood Pod - Chats about parenthood as a choice, how to better connect to friends and fam with kids and the politics of not-parenthood.

Rank #1: I Just Don't Want Kids with Megan Brown

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Do you ever feel like your answer to the question, "Why don't you want kids?" isn't good enough? Do you feel guilty because you don't like kids? On this week's ep, artist and designer Megan Brown joins the pod to talk about how hard it is to talk about being childfree. We work out some good answers and complain about the typical questions like, "Who will take care of you when you're old?" Why don't people see the Golden Girls as the perfect pop culture answer to that dumb question. Their kids all sucked and they seemed to be doing just fine. (Yes, yes we know Sophia and Dorothy were mom and daughter.) We also discuss fulfillment without kids and how that is fulfillment enough. People who are childfree by choice are brave! 

Apr 18 2019

41mins

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Rank #2: Unselfish and Christlike with Claire Parker

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"I'd love to be considered unselfish and Christlike, but as a woman it's nearly impossible." - Jen Kirkman
Comedian Claire Parker joins Auntie Julia to talk about Jen Kirkman's, "I Can Barely Take Care of Myself." Jen's book really touches on all of the cliches childfree people hear all the time in a funny and at times poignant way. She's a great storyteller and very assured in her choice. Claire also discusses her podcast about Britney Spears and other pop cultural touchstones.

May 30 2019

59mins

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Rank #3: Selfish, Shallow and Self Absorbed with Maxine Sims

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"My womb has always been empty, but my life is full." - Jeanne Safer
Listener Maxine Sims joins Auntie Julia all the way from the UK to discuss the first selection of the Not The Mama Book Club, "Selfish, Shallow and Self Absorbed - Sixteen Writers on the Decision Not to Have Kids" by Meghan Daum.
They talk about main themes threaded throughout all of the essays such as self realization, having "it all," and the writers relationships with their own mothers. Maxine and Julia select their favorite essays and discuss them in further detail as well. The decision to not have children isn't always a singular moment in one's life. It can be a series of small choices, realizations, disappointments and victories. February's Not The Mama Book Club selection is "Confessions of a Childfree Woman" by Marcia Drut-Davis. Check out our website notthemamapod.com and Insta stories for more information! Thanks for listening and happy reading!

Jan 31 2019

1hr 7mins

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Rank #4: The Real Childless Housewives with Julia Solomon

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Auntie Julia is joined by yet another Julia, comedian and Housewives fan, Julia Solomon! They examine the rarity that is the childless Housewife from the The Real Housewives reality series. Pop culture illuminates many realities about the way our society values and treats its women. The value of motherhood in this series tends to mean more power for women when they are in a group of their peers but doesn't necessarily translate when they are dealing with careers, husbands and exes. Even if you're not a HW fan, we hope you find value in the cultural discussion.

Jul 26 2018

1hr 17mins

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Rank #5: Maybe, Babies? with Casey James Salengo

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Comedian Casey James Salengo joins Auntie Julia this episode to chat about the possibility of infertility and aligning your individual goals with the goals of your partner. Casey gets candid about his childhood, health issues and finding the love of his life who really wants to be a mom. They discuss what fatherhood means to him and how he views toxic masculinity in regards to raising kids. Despite the heavy topics, it's fun and happy so we hope you enjoy listening in!

Aug 09 2018

52mins

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Rank #6: The Conception Racket with Elissa Reiling

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"How can I make money off of not-parenthood?? Tell me that!"
Marketing pro Elissa Reiling joins Auntie Julia to share her experiences as a not-mom in the city. They discuss life after divorce, maintaining friendships with parents and the suburbanization of NYC. A long rant about strollers on the subway during rush hour ensues. They also talk about targeted ad campaigns and fear tactics that capitalize on procreation. It's all bullshit. It's a fun episode and Elissa is a great guest! Keep reading "Confessions of a Childfree Woman" by Marcia Drut-Davis for our February #NotTheMamaBookClub selection!

Feb 07 2019

52mins

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Rank #7: Righteous Rage with Melody Kamali

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TW: Child Abuse, Sexual Abuse
Auntie Julia and comedian and storyteller Melody Kamali chat together this week about heavier topics. Melody discusses her indecision about parenthood based on past experiences and having a partner who knows she wants to be a mom. They talk about parents, their childhoods and how people need to share stories to help raise the next generation. And it's OK for women to be righteously angry. Get into it!

Aug 16 2018

1hr 14mins

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Rank #8: Confessions of a Childfree Woman with Marcia Drut-Davis

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Childfree pioneer and author of February's Not The Mama Book Club selection, "Confessions of a Childfree Woman," Marcia Drut-Davis joins Auntie Julia to discuss her book and life. In 1974, in front of millions of 60 Minutes viewers, Marcia and her then husband confessed to his parents their desires to not have children. Facing death threats and job loss due to the backlash she experienced, Marcia built herself up to lead a successful life of educating and organizing. She has appeared in several childfree documentaries and organizes cruises to expand the non-parent community. We also talk about the state of the childfree movement today and what the future looks like. It's bright and joyful! Happy listening and be sure to follow Marcia!

Feb 28 2019

52mins

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Rank #9: The Stepmom Solution with Julia Johns

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Auntie Julia is joined this week by another Auntie Julia, comedian and graphic designer Julia Johns! They discuss the revolutionary act of being undecided on motherhood, being aunts, and how hard it is to talk about even the potential of not-parenthood.

Jul 12 2018

45mins

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Rank #10: No Kids, No Problem! with Leah Weinberg

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Entrepreneur Leah Weinberg joins Auntie Julia this week to chat about not wanting kids and knowing it! They discuss making space for career ambition, friendship with other not-parents and also just not liking kids all that much. They get to the bottom of the eternal question - "What do women DO without children?" A lot, actually!

Sep 06 2018

51mins

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Rank #11: Hipster Millennial Social Justice Kid Free Warriors with Paula Rondon

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Why don't people take young women seriously? Especially when they are speaking about the decisions they've made for their own lives? Artist Paula Rondon joins Auntie Julia this week to discuss this phenomenon and learning about how to trust ourselves no matter our ages. She also talks about her relationships with her family, friends and boyfriend and how to navigate their influences in her life while she simultaneously figures out what it is that she wants. She knows she's not a kid person. Of course Auntie Julia has to start with a rant about men on the internet so push through that to get to the goods. The episode ends with a fun chat about their shared belief in UFOs. Totes Caszh!

Nov 08 2018

1hr 27mins

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Rank #12: Hot and Childfree in the City with Melissa Stokoski

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Melissa Stokoski, comedian and Sex and the City scholar, joins auntie Julia this week to discuss how women without children were represented on the iconic television show. One of the first series to present storylines about abortion, infertility, and choosing to be childfree, Melissa and Auntie Julia dissect scenes and episodes that Not The Mama listeners will enjoy. While imperfect for many reasons, (too white, capitalistic, and dated puns galore, etc.) the impact of SATC on millennial women and pop culture overall can't be denied. Spoiler alert: Auntie Julia's a Samantha!

Aug 23 2018

1hr 8mins

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Rank #13: AUNTIES DELUXE with Liza Treyger

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Sometimes the best way to find out that you want to remain childfree is to spend time with children. Former back-up nanny and comedian Liza Treyger joins Auntie Julia to talk about their pasts as child-care providers. They've both been babysitters, camp counselors and of course, aunts so they do have some experience around kids yet have always known they don't want to become mothers. They also chat about the bounds of womanhood and how we need to make space for women who aren't mothers, no matter the reason. And bonus, David Drake produced the episode so the sound is better! Yay!!!

Nov 01 2018

1hr 18mins

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Rank #14: The Rest is Still Unwritten with Rachel Carter

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Auntie Julia is joined by author Rachel Carter to discuss mastering your own story and keeping an open mind as you piece together your life. She shares her thoughts on dating and finding a partner in her 30s but not defining her life's success by her relationship status. As a creator, she values her free time which plays a part of why she hasn't yet decided if she wants to have kids. They also discuss the importance of the desire to have kids and how that should be a larger part of the decision to become a parent. You should want them if you're going to have them! And if you don't know, you should take the time to figure that out. As Rachel says, "Just because something is hard, doesn't mean you have to tackle it." 

May 23 2019

57mins

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Rank #15: We're Not Selfish with Shalewa Sharpe

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Comedian Shalewa Sharpe joins Auntie Julia to discuss her moment with Chadwick Boseman, not wanting motherhood but supporting mom friends, progressive pro-lifers responsibility to shut down anti-choicers, and the required martyrdom of motherhood. They also chat about race in regards to parenting and the responsibility of all white people to dismantle racism in their communities.

Sep 27 2018

1hr 22mins

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Rank #16: Mommy & Me with Kara Klenk

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Do babies have to destroy friendships? No! Auntie Julia is joined by her new friend and mom-2-B Kara Klenk to discuss building the bridge between those of us who choose to be childfree and those who choose to become parents. If you accept yourself, it's much easier to accept others even when their choices are different than yours. It's easier said than done though so we chat it out and share our experiences with the care and keeping of friendships. We also have a fun convo about the TV show "Insecure" and the storyline about friends and babies. Kara's comedy album "Undefeated" comes out March 8 and is available for pre-order now on iTunes!

Jan 25 2019

1hr 6mins

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Rank #17: Decidedly Undecided with Molly Ruben Long

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You can decide to be undecided! This week, comedian and actress Molly Ruben Long joins Auntie Julia to declare her indecision about parenthood, marriage and other grown up questions. They also get to the bottom of Auntie Julia's aggressive personal stance against marriage which may inadvertently have swayed Molly's decision on that front. Luckily, both decided to have a good time so we hope you join in the fun!

Aug 30 2018

1hr 12mins

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Rank #18: Breast Isn’t Best with Katie Boyle

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Comedian and podcast host Katie Boyle joins the pod this week to talk about how to deal with the kid question in a new relationship. We also discuss reproductive rights in Ireland and family dynamics at home. And men’s opinions about women’s bodies? No thanks!

May 02 2019

46mins

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Rank #19: It Goes On with Lil Frex

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Rapper Lil Frex joins Auntie Julia on the pod this week to experience a pregnancy scare in real time, wanting kids as fantasy vs. reality, their sex ed experiences and whether or not you can get knocked up on your period. Frex is open to testing this out but Julia of course, is not. At the end of the ep we play "It Goes On" from her latest mixtape, "The Breakup Tape."

Oct 18 2018

52mins

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Rank #20: No New People with Lane Pieschel

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Special Romance Episode! Lane Pieschel, Auntie Julia's famed boyfriend/partner/not-husband joins the pod this week to confirm that he is not being manipulated against procreation. They chat about their relationship and how they came to the decision to not have kids. They discuss family pressures and influence and assert themselves as partners in their calling to not have children. Lane talks about his childhood and how he's always felt a bit uncomfortable around kids. Don't forget to keep reading, "Selfish, Shallow and Self Absorbed" by Meghan Daum as the first selection in the Not The Mama Book Club!

Jan 10 2019

1hr 3mins

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Back to School Madness

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Auntie Julia quickly checks in to let you know NTM is hard at work recording new eps for the coming weeks! 

Sep 13 2019

6mins

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No Kids, No Reason with Liza Treyger and Lil Frex

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No kids, no reason. Has justifying the childfree choice gone too far?  Auntie Julia and two of her great friends, Liza Treyger and Lil Frex discuss the apocalypse. 

Aug 30 2019

1hr

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Euphoria with Tommy McNamara

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Tommy McNamara, NTM FANATIC, comedian and host of the fabulous podcast, Stand By Your Band, joins Auntie Julia this week to discuss all things Euphoria. SPOILERS ABOUND! 

The Zendaya-led teen drama may not seem on brand for Not the Mama but it meets all the requirements: Bad parents? Check. Messed up kids? Check. Sensible abortion? Check. Tommy and Julia discuss all the helpful warnings Euphoria provides for those who have yet to decide whether or not they want to become parents. Ice skate your dreams and enjoy this super fun episode! 

@notthemamamedia on instagram

notthemamapod@gmail.com 

notthemamapod.com

Aug 16 2019

1hr 15mins

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The Adventures of Lady No-Kids with Ashley Hamilton

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Not The Mama is blessed with the presence of comedian Ashley Hamilton on this week's brand new episode! She and Auntie Julia discuss "The Adventures of Lady No-Kids cartoon as well as Ashley's thoughts on adoption vs pregnancy. 

Aug 09 2019

1hr 2mins

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Childless Millennial Sluts with Paula Rondon

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Welcome to Season 2! Officially in our second year of Not The Mama, Auntie Julia and guest Paula Rondon discuss their childfree summer fun. Did you know some people don't LOVE people who don't have kids????

Aug 01 2019

43mins

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Happy 4th of July!

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Happy 4th of July! We'll be back next week with new episodes including our first ever live episode! Hope your summers are going amazing! We're working on great new eps and can't wait to continue the NTM journey with all of you! xoxo Happy Summer! 

Jul 04 2019

1min

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HAPPY ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY, NOT THE MAMA! - The Redo

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Happy first Anniversary - 2.0 

Auntie Julia didn't like her first anniversary ep so she redid it. If you listened already, bless you. This one is more fun. She recaps what she's learned this year and speaks to what she hopes is to come. Proudly Childfree! 

Come to our first LIVE Not the Mama Show hosted by Audio Loves Company this July 2nd at 7PM in Brooklyn, NY. Special NTM guests and another surprise podcast will be there. Free tickets are available at audioloves.company

The articles we referenced in the pod can be found here: More Women Are Choosing Not To Have Kids

And: This Is What No One Tells You About Being Child-Free In Your 40s

We hope to see you there! 

Jun 20 2019

37mins

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Yo Sperm! With Lauren Vino

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“Vasectomies are cool! There’s smoke!” Comedian and dad expert Lauren Vino joins Auntie Julia to discuss the burgeoning male fertility industry and how calling off her engagement helped her take control of her life.

Jun 06 2019

1hr 4mins

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Unselfish and Christlike with Claire Parker

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"I'd love to be considered unselfish and Christlike, but as a woman it's nearly impossible." - Jen Kirkman
Comedian Claire Parker joins Auntie Julia to talk about Jen Kirkman's, "I Can Barely Take Care of Myself." Jen's book really touches on all of the cliches childfree people hear all the time in a funny and at times poignant way. She's a great storyteller and very assured in her choice. Claire also discusses her podcast about Britney Spears and other pop cultural touchstones.

May 30 2019

59mins

Play

The Rest is Still Unwritten with Rachel Carter

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Auntie Julia is joined by author Rachel Carter to discuss mastering your own story and keeping an open mind as you piece together your life. She shares her thoughts on dating and finding a partner in her 30s but not defining her life's success by her relationship status. As a creator, she values her free time which plays a part of why she hasn't yet decided if she wants to have kids. They also discuss the importance of the desire to have kids and how that should be a larger part of the decision to become a parent. You should want them if you're going to have them! And if you don't know, you should take the time to figure that out. As Rachel says, "Just because something is hard, doesn't mean you have to tackle it." 

May 23 2019

57mins

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ABORTION IS STILL LEGAL IN ALL 50 STATES

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Auntie Julia recorded an amazing episode with comedian and host of "Dear Nana: Advice from and Idiot" and repeat NTM guest Irene Morales BUT it got DESTROYED somehow. She made a mini ep to try to make up for it but then got a cold out of nowhere. Not her night. She powered through to give some thoughts on all the anti-choice nonsense happening in the states right now. Sorry but we have no need for "pro life progressives." If you don't stand up for the rights of people who can get pregnant, you don't understand how to fight for progress. If you're able, please give to The Yellowhammer Fund which funds abortions in Alabama.

Next week a full ep will be up but she's happy to connect in this mini version as well. Thank you for listening! 

May 16 2019

15mins

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Girlie, Girl Power with Vonetta Moses

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Vonetta Moses joins Auntie Julia this week to talk about choosing to be childfree even when you've always pictured the romantic fairytale ending for your life. Vonetta got what she wanted without having to give up her full happy ending. She also shares her experience of being childfree in a huge family. Even with nieces, nephews, cousins and god children she still faces a bit of pressure to have kids of her own. She is also a step mom and talks about how she has defined that role to fit into her childfree status. They also discuss the "girlie girl" renaissance and how feminine power is having a moment. Oh, and, they work in some Vanderpump Rules chats, specifically Ariana's childfree storyline . 

May 09 2019

44mins

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Breast Isn’t Best with Katie Boyle

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Comedian and podcast host Katie Boyle joins the pod this week to talk about how to deal with the kid question in a new relationship. We also discuss reproductive rights in Ireland and family dynamics at home. And men’s opinions about women’s bodies? No thanks!

May 02 2019

46mins

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News & Views - Enthusiastically Pro Choice

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Listener Check In! Auntie Julia shares some previews on what's to come from Not The Mama as well as a request for more ratings on iTunes! Take a second and help us out! She was recently interviewed by Author and Childfree Advocate Tanya Williams for her Childfree Choices program. Watch their chat and join the convo. Julia also plugs the NYTs podcast, The Daily's two-part series, The Abortion Wars. She's noticed an uptick in anti-choice trolling so she wanted to double down on our ENTHUSIASTICALLY PRO CHOICE POSITION. The Daily shares insights from both sides of the abortion fight with an excellent interview with Planned Parenthood board member and 101 year old activist, Vivian Zwick. When asked if the days before legalized abortion seem old fashioned and long ago, Zwick ominously replies, "I'm afraid not." We've got to keep up the fight! 

Apr 29 2019

12mins

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Deal With It, Bitch with Damien Davis

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Artist and Educator Damien Davis joins the pod to discuss being happily single and childfree. Damien is currently in residence at the Sugar Hill Children's Museum of Art & Storytelling in Harlem, NYC. His experience working with kids reaffirms his desire to not have children because the work of raising them doesn't fit into his life. We talk about what family means and the importance of being a self actualized person. Damien reminds us to protect our concept of family so that the system as it is can't take away what and who we value. Check out Damien's art at his website and in our Instagram stories!

Apr 25 2019

1hr 6mins

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I Just Don't Want Kids with Megan Brown

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Do you ever feel like your answer to the question, "Why don't you want kids?" isn't good enough? Do you feel guilty because you don't like kids? On this week's ep, artist and designer Megan Brown joins the pod to talk about how hard it is to talk about being childfree. We work out some good answers and complain about the typical questions like, "Who will take care of you when you're old?" Why don't people see the Golden Girls as the perfect pop culture answer to that dumb question. Their kids all sucked and they seemed to be doing just fine. (Yes, yes we know Sophia and Dorothy were mom and daughter.) We also discuss fulfillment without kids and how that is fulfillment enough. People who are childfree by choice are brave! 

Apr 18 2019

41mins

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Alert! Parent on the Pod with Jenny Hoskins

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Do you worry that being #childfree will mess up your friendships with friends who have kids? Auntie Julia and her first parent guest & bestie Jenny Hoskins chat about their relationship and how it's grown, changed and strengthened along the two different paths they've chosen. They share their perspective on what works for them and how you can confront any fears or anxieties you have about how parenthood and not-parenthood will affect your own friendships. Jenny shares some great insights about the pressures society puts onto women no matter their choices and talks about what her life will look like when her kids are all grown up. They also discuss March's NTM bookclub pick, My Life on the Road by Gloria Steinem. Auntie Julia confesses that she loves the book because it's self help disguised as a memoir, the only way she can take advice. 

Apr 12 2019

1hr 8mins

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Special Announcement!

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The new ep this week is delayed due to special editing needs. It will be up Friday, April 12!

Apr 11 2019

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Ya Don't Gotta Have A Baby with Lane Pieschel

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Lane Pieschel makes his triumphant return to the pod to talk about the best Childfree show of all time, Seinfeld. We discuss the greatness of Elaine and how wonderful it is to watch a show with no children on it. We also chat about what shows we were or weren't allowed to watch as kids. Are you sponge worthy? 

Apr 05 2019

48mins

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Ya Don't Gotta Have a Baby with Lane Pieschel

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Lane Pieschel makes his triumphant return to the pod to talk about the best #Childfree show of all time, Seinfeld. We discuss the greatness of Elaine and how wonderful it is to watch a show with no children it in. We also chat about what shows we were or weren't allowed to watch as kids. Are you sponge worthy?

Apr 04 2019

48mins

Play

iTunes Ratings

59 Ratings
Average Ratings
52
2
2
2
1

Original

By IrishJoe34 - Aug 04 2018
Read more
Love this podcast! I’m a dad and I’m into it so that shows it’s for everyone!!!

Incredible Podcast

By YasTween - Jul 23 2018
Read more
Listen to this pod!! I love it