Rank #1: Milo Yiannopoulos loved by the alt-right, also by priests. Plus heartwarming adoption stories – The Devil’s Advocates Episode 191

Feb 20 2017
1hr 12mins
Rank #2: Fleshlight Launch – the first appliance you can bone! Now with teledildonics! Plus Ben’s gay haircut – The Devil’s Advocates Episode 195

The Fleshlight Launch powered by Kiiroo is the hot new product that pairs with the Fleshlight to completely automate the sex act so you can remove all manual labor from the equation. This may not seem like a big deal, but they’ve also put bluetooth in the thing so that it can sync to special porn videos to simulate what’s going on in the scene. Combine that with VR, which is already part of some of thee videos, and you can start to see how the Fleshlight Launch could be of some interest. I’m not sure if things will ever get to the point where we can fool ourselves with technology, but is sure is fun taking the journey.
Mar 20 2017
1hr 47mins
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Rank #3: The Justice League is here! We review the first trailer – plus Alex Jones admits Pizzagate was a hoax – The Devil’s Advocates Episode 196

The Justice League is DC’s answer to the Avengers. Both groups go way back in comic book history, but Marvel’s movies based on their stable of superheroes have been tremendously more liked. Maybe because they took the time to cultivate the story of each character over the course of years, rather than just try to introduce all the main characters in the subplot of a single movie already hampered by a stupid premise, pitting Batman against Superman for no conceivable reason.
Batman v. Superman let everyone down, but DC fans hoped that Suicide Squad would redeem the DC universe. It did not. It may have actually made it worse. So, any hope still left resides in the actual Justice League movie. Does the trailer give any hope? Listen and find out. Or just watch it. You know you’re going to see this movie. And then regret it.
Remember Pizzagate? No? Then you’re a sane, employed individual. There were those who believed Hillary Clinton was involved in a Satanic pedophile traffic ring based out of a pizza restaurant. One of the people who pushed this story was trusted news source to the president, Alex Jones of infowars. Even he admitted now that pushing that hoax was stupid. (Hoax? is that word really necessary? Any sane person would never believe that… would they?) So where do we go from here? To the motherland, probably.
Mar 27 2017
40mins
Rank #4: Sex doll brothels! Plus Beauty and the Beast – who makes more money? – The Devil’s Advocates Episode 193

Wanna go to a brothel? Me too! Wanna go to one that consists only of sex dolls? Me neither! But some people do, I guess, in Spain since they opened just that – a sex doll brothel. The dolls are sanitized in between patrons. Too bad the same can’t be said for the real thing. Chlamydia is the gift that keeps on giving.
I could talk about this sex doll brothel all day, but here’s something: Beauty and the Beast is a tale as old as time. Like a song as old as rhyme, you might say. However, we’re less interested in the officially gay live action movie than we are the concept of beauty and the beast as income generators. A new study indicates that extremely unattractive people make more money than hot people. This seems to go against everything we have learned during our time here on Earth, but perhaps the infinitely outcast have found a way to exact their revenge upon the attractive people who tormented them long ago: by being their boss. “Clean out the wastebaskets.” “But I’m the social media director…” “You heard what I said.”
Mar 07 2017
1hr 57mins
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Rank #5: SNL could be Trump’s downfall! – The Devil’s Advocates Episode 190

Feb 14 2017
1hr 49mins
Rank #6: Obamacare Replacement Plan – screwing you over without the smoke and mirrors! – The Devil’s Advocates Episode 194

The Obamacare Replacement Plan has been unveiled by Paul Ryan, and everyone is very excited to harness the power of the free market to drive costs down by giving consumers the power to shop around. If there’s one thing the Republicans understand, it’s that Americans love shopping. However, one cannot help but wonder as the blood drains from your bullet wound whether or not this is the best time to be doing some shopping. Is Trumpcare a lateral move, a downgrade or an upgrade? It depends more on you than the facts. If you want to like it, you will. If you want to hate it, you will. If you want pretend we’re living in an alternate reality where none of this has happened, give me pointers on how you do it.
Mar 14 2017
40mins
Rank #7: Bill Paxton RIP plus the free press dies while we watch the Oscars – The Devil’s Advocates Episode 192

Bill Paxton died. So that’s sad. Many of our favorite quotes come from Bill Paxton movies, and this week we honor him in a very special way. Meanwhile, a free press is the cornerstone to a democracy. This opinion is widely help by those not in a vegetative state, and even shares supporters on both sides of the political aisle. Trump says the press is the enemy of the people. Most of the American people are still busy laughing about how stupid and horrifying our new president is, but the laughing should probably stop now, because the idea of free press just died in front of eyes. Trump refused to let in the media outlets that he doesn’t like because they’re not nice. CNN, the New York Times, BBC and others were not allowed in to the informal press conference. That’s how you start a dictatorship, but hey whatever let’s all route for La La Land in the Oscars, it’s a magical journey of two impossibly attractive people facing marginal levels of adversity for about an hour. Nothing to see here, folks.
Feb 27 2017
35mins
Rank #8: What is this, a rerun? Yup! Due to unforeseen circumstances, this week is a repeat episode! – The Devil’s Advocates Episode 188.5

Jan 30 2017
2hr 32mins
Rank #9: The Bane of our existence – The Devil’s Advocates Episode 188

Jan 23 2017
47mins
Rank #10: We try VR Porn from Badoink live on the show! Plus more high school sports fail stories – The Devil’s Advocates Episode 187

Jan 17 2017
1hr 29mins
Rank #11: Planned Parenthood should be defunded, says local village idiots. Plus therapy pets and the Florida airport shooting – The Devil’s Advocates Episode 186

Some dude went to the Fort Lauderdale, FL airport and started shooting people. We don't know why yet. We'll probably never know why, because by the time they figure it out the news cycles will have moved on to the next mass shooting. My country 'tis of thee, sweet land of liberty...
Blind people need service dogs. No question. However, other people have decided they need therapy pets for emotional support. They want these pets to be able to go on planes with them in the cabin. Actual therapy dogs are trained to behave as such, but people figured out that if you buy a $40 dog vest you can pass them off as service animals. Airlines are confused and afraid to turn anyone down because the imminent lawsuit would paint them as heartless corporate masters. Sometimes that's exactly what we need. Only heartless corporations have the power to stop nonsense like this. "They'll hate you for it, but that's the point. Corporations can make the choices other people can't. Corporations aren't the hero we deserve, but they're the one we need right now."
Jan 10 2017
37mins
Rank #12: Virtual reality will save us from 2017! Plus Ariana Grande hates being objectified – The Devil’s Advocates Episode 185

One of the largest draws of virtual reality is VR porn. In an effort to help mankind, we have acquired an Oculus Rift and tweaked a PC to meet the ridiculous requirements to run it. Over the next few months, or forever if our girlfriends leave us, we'll be trying out some VR Porn to see how good it is, what can be improved upon, and how difficult it is to catch your gism in a paper towel when you can't see. I wonder if subscriptions to Badoink and VRporn count as tax write offs for the show's parent company...
One pornographic source that never fails to disappoint is Ariana Grande. She dresses in extremely provocative outfits, sings about wanting to bang hot guys, and has an eternal look of being a teenager. You might think someone like this wouldn't be surprised when someone refers to them as being "sexy as hell" and being jealous when someone is "hitting that." You might even think she might be flattered, since that's mostly what she's putting out there for humanity to judge her on. You'd be WRONG- ARIANA GRANDE IS NOT A PIECE OF MEAT TO BE OBJECTIFIED. Now, watch this music video of her humping an exercise bike and think wholesome thoughts.
Jan 03 2017
1hr 39mins
Rank #13: Hatchimal, the new toy you must buy so that your kids will love you! Plus the Trump 10, crying newscasters, and Disney’s Moana has a porn accident – The Devil’s Advocates Episode 180

Many young students entering college gain the freshman 15. Some people like to make fun of this; I openly welcome it because it puts girls 15 pounds closer to my league. However, there's now a freshman 15 for adults, and it's called the Trump 10. People who are so stressed out and tired from the election cycle and Trump's election in particular are eating their way into a food coma to ease the stress level. I say eat on; no one wants to live the years past 70 anyway.
Nothing's better than when a newscaster has a meltdown on the air. In this day and age, with trigger words gaining more power to rattle the already off-kilter emotions of the type of people who want to be in front of a camera, we should get to see more of this. This week there was a great meltdown on CNN caused by none other than the "n-word." Maybe if the newscasters makes it hers and owns the word, like black people did, it won't bother her anymore. It might bother a few other people though.
Nov 28 2016
2hr 4mins
Rank #14: President Trump. The Devil’s Advocates Episode 178

Nov 14 2016
1hr 47mins
Rank #15: Madonna gives BJs for Hillary voters! Plus the 3rd debate, and Sugar Granny the patriot – The Devil’s Advocates Episode 175

Did you see the final presidential debate? Of course you did, or at least you surmised the basics from SNL skits. Well, we're just the latest crappy source of coverage, but hopefully we'll have a few jokes you haven't heard yet. Stranger things have happened.
Oct 24 2016
1hr 3mins
Rank #16: CO2 levels are never going down and the world will end. Plus Trump roulette and the story of The Instigators – The Devil’s Advocates Episode 172

Speaking of Trump, he is absolutely dominating the news cycle, and the stories are getting weirder and crazier. We run through the headlines and see just how crazy it can get, including one where Donald Trump supposedly admits to finding 12 year old Paris Hilton attractive. Is it true? Listen to find out, you clickbait-feeding jerkfaces.
Oct 03 2016
1hr 38mins
Rank #17: Debate time- the circus officially opens its tent flaps! Plus Anthony Weiner and the teenage girl, cops up to their old tricks again, and the relationship point system – The Devil’s Advocates Episode 171

Since the debate hasn't happened yet as of this writing, let's talk about what did happen. Anthony Weiner sexted with a 15 year old girl. He's being investigated. He could face prison time. This is not a man feeding his ego at the cost of his formal life; this is now a man who has an addiction or some weird core-level acceptance issues going on and wants to be liked by everyone... but mostly women. And girls, apparently.Anthony dude we've all been there, but looking at underage cleavage is like looking at the sun. You get a... oh just watch the damn clip, you know where I'm going.
We had a few quiet weeks where police did their jobs, black people stayed out of trouble, and we lived in a... well maybe not a utopia, but maybe at least a Fruitopia. Sadly, cops are up to their old tricks again and two more black people were killed by cops. Probably a lot of other races too, but you know, with the news cycle and the ratings, I don't know, it's all very complicated. So, were these warranted? It's looking iffy, but the fun fact this week is that none of the killer cops were white men this time around. That didn't stop a lot of protesters from saying that all white people are the devil, which is very hurtful to us white folks because we worked really hard to keep that on the DL.
Sep 26 2016
1hr 41mins
Rank #18: iPhone SE7EN – What’s in the box?!?! Plus Demi Lovato the dunce and prison vs. marriage – The Devil’s Advocates Episode 169

Has anyone ever told you marriage is like a prison? If you are married, you already know this, but did you know things can get so bad that you actually prefer real prison? We review a story of one guy who preferred to live out his days in prison rather than spend one more minute with his spouse. I guess no one told him you get spouses in prison, too... and they're equally unpleasant. A different manner of unpleasant, maybe, but... still worth noting.
Do you know who Demi Lovato is? If so, you're either a teen girl, gay, or Ben. She became co-owner of a treatment facility for mental health issues. It's a for-profit business, so it's not terribly altruistic, but Demi thinks it is. She has some very special thoughts on the subject. Let's just say the big guy upstairs has clearly made a pact with the adorable young idiot. The amazing thing about youth and beauty is that you'll never know just how stupid you are, which is sort of beautiful in its own way. But in another very real and actual way, it's despicable. Kind of like this show. Judging by this picture on the left, she's getting fashion advice from Ben2. He's in the bloodstream now.
Sep 12 2016
1hr 47mins
Rank #19: Lyft driver fights off a social justice warrior! Plus Pamela Anderson says porn caused Anthony Weiner’s behavior problems, and the burden of children – The Devil’s Advocates Episode 168

Pamela Anderson is famous for being in Playboy 15 times and blowing Tommy Lee on camera, so it’s only natural that she would write an article for the Wall Street Journal. Along with the help of Rabbi Shmuley, she wonderfully articulates how porn is for losers and is the most dangerous thimg plaguing our society today. Perhaps someone should introduce her to ISIS. I think theyd get along really well.
Sep 06 2016
1hr 49mins
Rank #20: Burkini babes from outer space! Plus the Hillary Clinton health conspiracy, the alt right, Alex Jones, People of Color and an ending that will give you nightmares – The Devil’s Advocates Episode 167

Hillary Clinton is going to be our next president. The problem is, the alt right doesn’t think she’s going to make it because her health is in question. The alt right is convinced she has dementia, fatigue, cancer, brain damage, and a multitude of other ailments that seem largely absent in all her public appearances. The alt right is the group of republicans that have a penchant for conspiracy theory, and their leader is Alex Jones. Mr. Jones is out of hid goddamned mind but makes a tidy living off his lunacy doing his radio show, so more power to him. But not too much more power, the alt right seems to matter all of a sudden and that’s not good for anyone.
Some anchor on Good Morning America used the term “colored people” during a conversation, and people did not like it. It’s an antiquated term from the 50s that is considered rude and racist. This can be confusing, however, because the current term people are using that is considered in good taste is “people of color.” Seemingly the exact same phrase, how can they have such different connotations? We discuss it, and despite all odds actually come up with a cogent reason why that is. Hey, every once in a while we accidentally have an intelligent conversation. A broken clock is right twice a day.
Aug 30 2016
1hr 39mins