Cover image of The Kitchen Is On Fire
(36)

Rank #103 in Food category

Arts
Comedy
Food

The Kitchen Is On Fire

Updated 3 days ago

Rank #103 in Food category

Arts
Comedy
Food
Read more

Food writer James Ramsden and musician Sam Herlihy dish up a weekly offering of food-related nonsense, exploring the complex and often confusing world of modern gastronomy. One minute they might be discussing the qualities of rice vinegar, the next asking whether or not Cher actually enjoys sharing plates. With special guests and even more special games, The Kitchen Is On Fire is a essential listening for anyone with ears. Follow them on Twitter @Kitchen_On_Fire.

Read more

Food writer James Ramsden and musician Sam Herlihy dish up a weekly offering of food-related nonsense, exploring the complex and often confusing world of modern gastronomy. One minute they might be discussing the qualities of rice vinegar, the next asking whether or not Cher actually enjoys sharing plates. With special guests and even more special games, The Kitchen Is On Fire is a essential listening for anyone with ears. Follow them on Twitter @Kitchen_On_Fire.

iTunes Ratings

36 Ratings
Average Ratings
28
8
0
0
0

so nice

By Azzzoo - Nov 01 2019
Read more
I love it .I am Aziza from Libya

Great

By christc101eats - May 16 2017
Read more
This podcast is as good as Pidgin, which was a highlight of my recent trip to London

iTunes Ratings

36 Ratings
Average Ratings
28
8
0
0
0

so nice

By Azzzoo - Nov 01 2019
Read more
I love it .I am Aziza from Libya

Great

By christc101eats - May 16 2017
Read more
This podcast is as good as Pidgin, which was a highlight of my recent trip to London
Cover image of The Kitchen Is On Fire

The Kitchen Is On Fire

Latest release on Jan 26, 2020

Read more

Food writer James Ramsden and musician Sam Herlihy dish up a weekly offering of food-related nonsense, exploring the complex and often confusing world of modern gastronomy. One minute they might be discussing the qualities of rice vinegar, the next asking whether or not Cher actually enjoys sharing plates. With special guests and even more special games, The Kitchen Is On Fire is a essential listening for anyone with ears. Follow them on Twitter @Kitchen_On_Fire.

Rank #1: Ep151: Ghosts And Gooses

Podcast cover
Read more

It's the final episode before our over-haired pair take an utterly undeserved summer break and instead of doubling down on intelligence and wit, they do their usual and fling ever more nonsense on the pile they've been building for one hundred and fifty episodes so far....

A semi-libelous start involving the pair behind Hot-Dinners.com sampling cocaine by a swimming pool rapidly devolves further into wood on a boat, the necks of geese, and chipolata cookery on a beach.

James is/was secretly in love with Gail from 'Corrie', keeps going North and lived in a halfway house. Sam really was a terrible singer, was punished for a good deed on a train and has a really very interesting fact about Roald Dahl to share.

Later there is a very grim and NSFW tale about cottage cheese, some incredibly stupid/spooky chat about ghosts in Yorkshire and something else about the cheese known both here and indeed elsewhere as brie.

Cheese chat, ghost chat, geese chat, this chat caliber equals high. You must be high to listen to this. See you in Autumn people. See you in Autumn........

This episode is sponsored by your friendly neighborhood weapons manufacturer Lockheed Martin.......not really.

This episode is actually sponsored by fun seed and chemical suppliers Monsanto! Wow! Cancer and poisons and whatnot....actually joking again....

Booze professionals dropwine.co.uk and ourvodka.com/ourlondon are in fact packing the ad budget this week. Great news.

Goodbye.

Aug 12 2018

53mins

Play

Rank #2: Ep145: Everything I Know About Horses | Featuring writer Dolly Alderton

Podcast cover
Read more

Okay, think about big things.....what are you picturing? Mountains? Elephants? KFC Megabuckets? Sam's face? Do you know what is bigger than all of those things? Far bigger. This damn episode. This episode is a vast and impressive thing. Heft? It's got it. Expanse? Of course. Girth?....there can be no doubt about it.

Like* a dumb podcast version of an Icelandic saga we begin with a refurb at Pidgin and Sam looking at James in an odd fashion. You also hear about a delightful seafood-based and Thai-influenced barbeque that James cooked. Wowzer.

*unlike it in any way whatsoever.

Then things take a turn in a classic TKIOF direction when they start blathering on about seeing adult film stars at Au Pied De Cochon Sugar Shack, reel off some solid soup chat and also provide the world with quite possibly the greatest gravy technique of all time.

After all that 'excitement', thank God for a gift from the heavens, Dolly Alderton turns up and immediately makes a big impact on our gruesome twosome by dishing on recording her audiobook, her experiences with the readership of the Sunday Times and reveals that Dolly is in fact NOT HER REAL NAME!! Gadzooks!!

This triangular chat arrangement then goes on to discuss why Dolly wrote her book, funeral songs, 'Made In Chelsea' and bad reviews.

James reveals his deep love for SnakeBoards, Sam eats a melancholy prawn sandwich and they reveal the origins of the world's greatest ever insult: HORSE!

Oh and also, Dolly admits she did something truly awful a few days ago....cliff meet hanger.....

All in all, we had a lovely time,  and we hope you do too when you spray it in your ears. Liquid chat to bathe yer brain in, like a footspa for your synapses....in a way.

This week's episode is sponsored by your booze-delivering friends and ours: dropwine.co.uk.

Jun 29 2018

1hr 58mins

Play

Rank #3: Ep195: Fire! Sex! Money! | Featuring actor and comedian Natasia Demetriou

Podcast cover
Read more

This week on TickyOff there is the usual mix of witty banter, interesting food tips and tricks, béarnaise technique, a deep dive into Escoffier’s legacy and how to help your children if they happen to be fussy eaters. The above is a bald faced lie, despite the fact that my face is very much un-bald. It is haired. Non-bald. Like a rugged peach.

What there actually is a masturbating ghost ape, hawk excrement, Tilda Swinton eating rats, how to turn into a bat and turning Matt Berry into Kris Kristofferson.

Natasia Demetriou, star of ‘What We Do In The Shadows’, ‘Stath Lets Flats’ and ‘Ellie And Natasia’ is here and the TickyOff Boyz are nervous because they think she’s just swell. They try and quell the nerves before she arrives with the aforementioned sexy chimp spectre and the raptor mess. Sam wants to know if birds can smell. James gets annoyed and laughs a lot.

Then Natasia arrives and yaps up a goddamn storm about auditioning, her deep love for free snacks, visiting a half built EuroDisney and she reads a moving passage from her teenage diary about her heartfelt concern for her friends when they started smoking in a playground.

There’s also room in this meaty stuffed goose of an episode for the Goss brothers eating Ginsters, pigeons eating Mighty White and Natasia comes out swinging at schools for clowns.

This week’s episode is sponsored by rare Giant Condors of the world of wine dropwine.co.uk

Jul 28 2019

1hr 7mins

Play

Rank #4: Ep202: Fairground By Simply Red | Featuring Oklava and Kyseri chef-owner Selin Kiazim

Podcast cover
Read more

Guess what’s on fire? That’s right, the planet is. You can also add ‘The Kitchen’ to that flaming hot list. I feel like I’ve made that joke before. I’d look back and check but I can’t. I am a shark and I cannot reverse.

This week The TickyOff Boyz utterly fail to deliver an intro to the episode. This is because they were in the pub. Sometimes, these things happen. I’d apologise but to be honest, water meet underside of the bridge. Bygones. Etc.

Anyway you don’t need an intro when you’ve got Selin Kiazim in the house* *It’s not a house. It’s an office. Just for full disclosure. Selin tells all about how she ended up owning and running two (and a half) restaurants, writing a cookbook and appearing on ‘Great British Menu’. There’s Peter Gordon at The Providores chat, modernising the food of her childhood discussion and operating in a tricky business environment…..verbals.

Meanwhile James drops an enormous jug of Bloody Mary mix on a train platform, Sam explains competitive hot-dog eating contest technicalities and Selin admits that the cooking show that inspired her to start cooking may well have involved a pair of legends known as The TickyOff Boyz of the early nineties, Gary Rhodes and Ainsley Harriot.

This week’s episode is sponsored by The TickyOff Boyz of wine dropwine.co.uk

Oct 20 2019

1hr 2mins

Play

Rank #5: Ep184: Edible Fingers | Featuring food writer and cookbook author Rosie Birkett

Podcast cover
Read more

Serious stuff before the nonsense begins….

This Sunday James is running the Hackney Half Marathon along with his brother Will in aid of Bipolar UK, in memory of their uncle George. You can sponsor them at:

www.justgiving.com/jandwramsden

The computer has crashed at TickyOff Towers and sadly for you, a vast slab of pork chop based chat has been lost forever. Awful as this is, Sam and James manage to recover from the loss with an even heftier chunk of mouth sounds. James is fed up with London, may have hair plugs and proposed to his wife while watching a somewhat saucy movie. Meanwhile, Sam is concerned about a room service order in ‘Ghostbusters’, has meddled with Ash Nute’s pork chops and steals food from his son’s plate.

Then food writer Rosie Birkett arrives. She is late, but fortunately her tardiness is more than forgiven as she comes bearing a swathe of gifts for the TickyOff Two. Then, this trio of mouths in three skulls get to delivering at a high level on such topics as the music venues of Leeds, the joy of baking sourdough, dining in Mexico and the long list of food related words which get one’s back up.

Also, find out why Rosie was known as ‘Food Perv’, learn her thoughts on Dad Fashion and begin to understand exactly what strange behaviours Sam would get up to if he was ever invited on ‘Saturday Kitchen’.

Finally there is a chilling tale of Rosie’s near demise in the jaws of a giant lizard, also called Rosie. James takes a meal to a blogger and his nan who may or may not be nude, and Sam wears a name badge. Thrilling stuff.

It’s wild, it’s the opposite of mild and it sure does go on for a while. It’s TickyOff, and it’s the very best thing human beings can experience. Clothing might be optional, but safety is always paramount.

This week’s episode is sponsored by great adventurers on both sea and land dropwine.co.uk

May 10 2019

1hr 33mins

Play

Rank #6: Ep208: Portal In The Living Room | Featuring chef and restaurateur Marcus Samuelsson

Podcast cover
Read more

Another week, another episode of TickyOff. This week the damn Sam and the darn James open strong, with some scarf chat. The ground shakes at that level of chat. The seas boil with dialogue that powerful. A plague of locusts may well be released with mouthsounds so fascinating. There’s only one way to follow that up, and that’s with the long awaited return of GhostChat! Sam tells the usual scientifically-rigorous tale of a haunted suburban house in North Wales where a phone has gone missing, there is the stench of rotting flesh and it’s impossible to ascertain how many kids live in said house. Chilling.

Then all round big deal chef Marcus Samuelsson arrives and discusses his visits to football stadiums, why lingonberries are much better than cranberries and why paella is so tricky to make well. He also discusses slow expansion, what it was like coming up in the industry as a young black chef and how he learnt his love of cooking from his adoptive grandmother.

Finally, he describes cooking the first state dinner for Barack Obama, the benefits of cold water dips and why all food needs proper context to make sense.

This week’s episode is sponsored by the presidents of wine, dropwine.co.uk

Dec 01 2019

47mins

Play

Rank #7: Ep169: Jamie Oliver Inside A Horse | Featuring food writer and cookbook author Anna Jones

Podcast cover
Read more

Do you remember that awesome bit of 'Empire Strikes Back' when Luke Skywalker is on Hoth, the icy ice nightmare of a planet and he's silly cold so he guts a wampa, that big hairy moose-esque fella, and climbs into them hot guts like a saveloy into a Pukka Pie? Well this week on TickyOff, pretty much exactly the same thing happens but instead of Luke Skywalker, it's Jamie Oliver and instead of Hoth, it's Wyoming and instead of a wampa, it's a big horse and instead of being in 'Empire Strikes Back' it's in a dream Sam had once.

Despite that tale for the damn ages there's also somehow time for Prohibition, Bane vs Shia LeBoeuf and haunted pubs. James may be a myth and Sam disappoints his buddy Ash Nute.

Then Anna Jones shows, which rhymes kinda, and things improve no end. There's Gloria Hunniford on Anusol, Gino Dicampo on a beach and the aforementioned Jamie in a horse.

And if that wasn't just about enough, there's igloo chat, tea with Colin from Radiohead and we learn exactly what 'living room balls' are...

This week's episode is sponsored by wine Da Vincis dropwine.co.uk and vodka Van Goghs ourvodka.com/ourlondon

Jan 28 2019

1hr 43mins

Play

Rank #8: Ep204: Stevie Bought A Hawk | Featuring chef and restaurateur Stevie Parle

Podcast cover
Read more

This week Sam and James get straight into the biggest issues currently facing humankind/themselves. Namely, how many murderers listen to TickyOff, whether or not food should ever make an appearance in the bedroom, whether James is scared of anything whatsoever and what happens if you throw eggs at space shuttles. James also drops a powerful review of ‘Joker’ and Sam has seen some sharks swimming by a nuclear power station.

After an opening like that, there’s only one person who could possibly stand toe to toe, aurally, with the TickyOff Two. That person is chef and restaurateur Stevie ‘Steve’ Parle. Stevie tells his tale from Ballymaloe cooking school, to the River Cafe, to opening Dock Kitchen, closing Rotorino and opening Pastaio at Westfield. He also shares the beauty of Japanese builders, the difficulties of setting the right tone in a kitchen and he provides an in depth recipe for his favourite Italian soup.

There’s also time for a long chat about colours, some glove discussion and some dried bean banter.

It’s TickyOff and be honest, there is nothing even close to as wonderful as this in any of your lives.

This week’s episode is sponsored by wine pedlars of great repute dropwine.co.uk

Nov 03 2019

1hr 16mins

Play

Rank #9: Ep183: Just Don't Cry | Featuring novelist Evie Wyld

Podcast cover
Read more

We know that our listeners worldwide come to TickyOff for many things, solace, James’s raw eroticism, Sam’s happy go lucky demeanor, ghost focused discussion. What few are looking for is a working knowledge of human, or animal, biology. That can only be a good thing. Especially in this week’s episode.

Somehow there are foul tear-ducts, talking sausages which may contain the ghosts of deceased pigs, the intelligence of corvids, sharks scaring whales and sheep stuck in blackberry bushes. Oh, and a mechanical spider.

Contributing to this menagerie of nonsense is author and bookshop owner Evie Wyld. She proves that she can communicate words via sounds created in her mouth not just on a page. It’s amazing. She discusses reviews, how she writes, unsuitable books for kids and treating escaped criminals like hedgehogs.

Meanwhile, Sam has stolen some erotic fiction from his mother, had a terrible experience in a highly regarded restaurant and thinks he looks like Harold from ‘Neighbours’. James has been to a theme park, is planning on test driving a Lamborghini and wants to make an Isle Of Wight based remake of ‘The Rock’.

Also, a little trigger warning for any dinner ladies listening in, James says ‘scrotum’ to one of your kind and Evie’s son punches one of your gang full in the face. Apologies in advance. We know that is no way to treat elderly slop-delivery folk but we have to keep it honest on the TickyOff and these things happened. This is real life. Wake up.

This week’s episode is sponsored by the Marty McFly and Doc Brown of wine dropwine.co.uk

Please hit us hard with a subscribe, a review, and a follow on Instagram: @tickyoff

May 05 2019

1hr 33mins

Play

Rank #10: Ep141: Anne Frank On The Face | Featuring Writer Anna Sulan Masing

Podcast cover
Read more

Crumbs. It's actually here. That's right. Episode 141 is here. What a number! What a number of episodes to have achieved. It's also World Otter Day at TKIOF Towers. Scenes. Real big scenes....

Sam gets GapShamed and has a whistling nose. James is on odd, pretty drunk form having fallen asleep on the tube, watched 'Patrick Melrose' in the wrong order and done a super funny joke on Islay.

Praise be to Anna Sulan Masing who appears just in time to throw down on some flat out weighty topics such as The Tomorrow Project, #metoo coming to the UK restaurant scene and whether or not tokenism can be useful.

However, this is TickyOff and seriousness cannot reign forever. Soon Sam is dying on a hill made of penises, James keeps making really woeful jokes and Anna goes deep on Guns and Roses, New Zealand 'Bogans' and the benefits of taking magic mushrooms.

This episode, like all episodes that have come before it, raises a vast number of questions but you should know up front that only one question really matters.....what does your heart smell like?

Wow. That's a deep one. Listen along with this triangle of chatting humans and you'll understand....scenes...real scenes...

This week’s episode is sponsored by dropwine.co.uk and ourvodka.com/ourlondon

Jun 01 2018

1hr 28mins

Play

Rank #11: Ep166: Christmas Special: A Strange Place For Bread | Featuring comedian Jamie Demetriou

Podcast cover
Read more

Christmas etc. You know the drill. Presents, drunk uncles, wool-based clothing, dry birds, Babycham, an incredible amount of paper based recycling, murders on sitcoms, listening to the music of glam rockers with an uncomfortable feeling that perhaps there are yet more of of these spangly jumpsuited bass playing clowns still to be caught and brought to justice by long running police investigations.....Wow. Everyone loves Christmas, and everyone loves a TKIOF Christmas Special.

The TickyOff Boyz are here to upend a sack full of nonsense into your goddamn meatus acusticus externus. That's right, James and Sam are filling up yer ear canals with a dungheap of festive mouth sounds. This week there is weird heavy metal, there are Icelandic people and there is also Sam making a desperate plea for an old friend to get back in touch with him. Meanwhile, James is distracted by his Apple Watch and they both ponder on what to look for in a swinging partner.

Then, like a man with God's beard but dressed like an old-timey fireman sneaking down a chimney in the dead of night to leave pagan offerings beneath a dying tree in your front room, comedian Jamie Demetriou arrives and Sam and James turn into (drunk) giggling fanboys.

Jamie reveals all about his journey through the world of comedy including the Edinburgh Festival, working with his sister and his series 'Stath Lets Flats'.  He also creates sounds using his vocal cords upon his love for Frank Ocean, his dislike of Morris Dancers and the strange things his father gets up to.

Very similarly to a family-size box of Quality Street there's also the coffee cremes of chat, a lot of shouting about soup, a long winded discussion of anti-stomach ulcer medication and James favourite site for long braised, Aga-based pornography...

This weeks episode is sponsored by the 'Last Christmas''s of wine dropwine.co.uk and the 'Fairytale Of New York''s of vodka ourvodka.com/ourlondon

Dec 23 2018

2hr 5mins

Play

Rank #12: Ep142: Flasher! | Featuring food journalist James Hansen

Podcast cover
Read more

"I've got the key, I've got the secret" someone sang on a terrible song a while ago. If the key and the secret is actually episode one hundred and forty two of TickyOff then YOU now have said key and said secret and you have these aforementioned items without that garbage song puking in yer ears....anyway...

Food journalist and baby faced drinker James Hansen is here and the topics are deep. We're talking canned tuna, a deep dive into the world of coffee, cakes made of gravy and working in a theatre.

Before Hansen shows, James and Sam babble on about their office night out, their gardening exploits outside Magpie and the wonders of the mighty restaurant Ciao Bella.

Sam sees a Native American on the tube platform and Ottolenghi on a bike and Margot phones in to try and get our wonderful hosts to go boozing with her.

There's all that nonsense plus a bumper Quickfire and a hefty dose of Over/Underrated.

We really hope you like this podcast. We have love for you. In a way.

This weeks episode is sponsored by the mad booze loonies at  dropwine.co.uk and ourvodka.com/ourlondon

Jun 11 2018

1hr 23mins

Play

Rank #13: Ep150: Salad Cream Tears | Featuring powerful legends James Ramsden and Samuel Herlihy

Podcast cover
Read more

"Knock Knock!" "Who is there?" "Tree Beard from ‘Lord Of The Rings’!" "You just knocked on a slab of your own flesh!" "What?" The door you knocked on is made of wood, like you! "I didn’t think about that." "Wake up Treebeard and smell the wood you big……tree!"

If TickyOff was a tree, it would be a big knobbly number, a tree of many rings, a fair amount of root rot, maybe a creepy owl in a hole and no doubt packing some serious fungus about the midriff. The above is a tree related way to say that TKIOF is one hundred and fifty years old!! If by years you mean episodes. James and Sam look back, look forward and look around dumbfounded as they consider the usual array of vast topics. This week James feels guilty, wonders if he’s fake or real and also ponders whether or not he’s a warmonger. Sam is concerned his memory is failing him at every turn, goes camping in a gale and meets his great uncle’s best mate in a cemetery. There’s also time for Dead Man’s Charcoal, a Love Island press release, and some cacio e pepe chat. As things head towards the end, Sam reveals that this is in fact his final ever appearance on TKIOF, James weeps tears of salad cream as he ‘completes’ and as the dust settles, they wonder on one of life’s greatest imponderables: Is massage actually any good?

Aug 06 2018

1hr 11mins

Play

Rank #14: Ep157: Pinking For Quinces | Featuring food consultant and writer Tess Ward

Podcast cover
Read more

'Verily' they did doth say..... except I don’t know what 'verily' means and I don’t know who they are. The only 'they' I know is James and Sam off of the Tickyoff. They don’t say 'verily', they say all these things instead, from those holes up front on their lovely faces. This week TickyOff HQ smells strongly of kimchi so they leave the window open and then sing ‘Man In The Mirror’ by Mickey Jackson. Fortunately, keen-bean Tess Ward turns up and they get into wellness, influencers, Mental Health Day and Fairtrade. It’s not all big big topics though. James is confused by placentas and gives a perhaps overly detailed description of a video featuring Cristiano Ronaldo. Tess hates mayo, loves bio-gas and knows a lot about biohacking. Sam has been made homeless, wrote two unpublished books and doesn’t like Chris Martin from the band some call IcyFun but others know only as Coldplay. Who knows how much wonder one pod can hold but somehow there’s also time for Tess’s bar raising stoner food classics, a rye bread heist and the day that Pidgin nearly killed Jon Snow from a show some people call ‘Fun With Posh Chairs’ and others know only as ‘Game Of Thrones’. Oh excuse me is that the doorbell? Yes it is. It’s someone coming to tell me how awesome TKIOF is. I know how good it is. Do not bother my doorbell again please. Thank you.

This week's episode is sponsored by vino legends dropwine.co.uk and vodka mentalists ourvodka.com/ourlondon

Also go check out the awesome work being done by the wonderful folk at www.fairtrade.org.uk

Oct 12 2018

1hr 27mins

Play

Rank #15: Ep175: The Restaurant Exorcist | Featuring Sarit Packer and Itamar Srulovich from Honey and Co.

Podcast cover
Read more

This week Sam and James are both incredibly depressed. It’s amazing how despite this, they still open with this much world-beating chat gold to be honest. No one else could deliver chat at this level with black hounds humping at their haunches. No one. That’s why you come here and these guys just turn it on like it’s nothing. Impressive I’m sure you’ll agree. No other human mouths could spurt kombucha updates, sleeping bag considerations, packing books for a trip in the Arctic based on weight and fake interview confessions, in this manner and at this level. No one. After an opening like this week’s, only two people could possibly arrive and immediately match the TickyOff Boyz chat diamond for sparkling chat diamond. These two people are Sarit and Itamar from Honey & Co. This rarely spotted quadruple of mouths go deep on how to and how not to open a restaurant, growing at the right pace, and the benefits of being your own boss. There’s also a whole bunch of truth delivered aurally concerning how to maintain a relationship under the pressures of running a business, they take a swing at French patisserie, might want their neighbour dead and Sam bites his tongue as they go big on the wonders of honey. All this plus, a harp playing ghost in the bakery and Sarit and Itamar share both the best and worst traits they see in one another which is insanely cute. Which no one has ever, in the entire history of the mighty TickyOff, described any of the content as being. That was a truly awful sentence to end this blurb with but…you know. The gold is on the pod yeah, it ain’t here. What do you want from me? Wake up.

This week’s podcast is sponsored by amazing wine fella-me-lads dropwine.co.uk and brilliant vodka whippersnappers ourvodka.com/ourlondon

Mar 10 2019

1hr 17mins

Play

Rank #16: Ep176: Werewolf Maintenance | Featuring journalist and writer Mollie Goodfellow

Podcast cover
Read more

Sam begins this week’s episode with a war on science. He disproves ‘The Five Second Rule’. Yes that’s right. A towering pillar of humankind’s understanding of existence itself, is pushed over like a poor quality Jenga player might topple down those funtime wooden blocks. James is back from Thailand, and he’s in love with the food, the vibe, a man of the woods and with his very own Mongolian donkey. They also manage to cover people reading showy books in public and Sam gets very ratty with the Renaissance. Then Mollie Goodfellow arrives and within actual seconds, teachers are getting their comeuppance, Joe Wicks is in Eastenders, Greggggggg Wallace is working out his back muscles and real life people are being met in real life and some people feel uncomfortable about that. They also blabber on about pasta, private school guilt, the legend of King Arthur and The Sopranos. And Mollie brings up ghosts. Which James loves.

This week’s episode is sponsored by myths and legends of the world of wine, dropwine.co.uk

Mar 17 2019

1hr 31mins

Play

Rank #17: Ep193: Chronology Of Outrage | Featuring Eater London editor Adam Coghlan

Podcast cover
Read more

Last week the TickyOff Boyz visited the ancient pyramids. As they approached these magnificent desert triangles, Sam jumped down from James’s mighty back and noticed something. “A triangle has three points!” Sam bellowed powerfully. James snorted in agreement and they both immediately reached the same conclusion. They should find a guest who had been on the TickyOff twice before and invite them back on the TickyOff for a third TickyOff appearance so that they could be the first triangular guest on the TickyOff. What better way to pay homage to their favourite shape, the triangle? There was only one possible human who could achieve this milestone, Eater London editor, Adam Coghlan. Sam jumped back astride his trusty steed with a powerful cry of: “To home, my equine buddy!” They turned away from the sandy three sided brick stacks and rode home to TickyOff Towers to anoint the very first TickyOff Triangle Human.

Adam ponders on why some people hate Eater London, the AA Gill award controversy, influencers, nuance torpedoes and reaching across an aisle. He comes out in support of a foul crisp and raves about Tata Eatery. Also, Sam has had an operation on his back and legged it from a nurse. James went to Yorkshire and cooked a rubbish salmon-based meal. There’s gildas discussion, Adam wears something called The Bill Oddie and Sam goes up to the top of the Royal Opera House only to discover a strange genre of toilet.

This weeks’ episode is sponsored by legendary whisperers of wine dropwine.co.uk

Jul 14 2019

1hr 28mins

Play

Rank #18: Ep170: Sasquatch!|Featuring cook and food writer Melissa Hemsley

Podcast cover
Read more

Another week, another episode of the world’s most popular podcast, TickyOff. You are more than welcome. Don’t call us heroes. We’re just everyday folk like you. We have mouths on the front of our heads and via these mouths we make sounds that drip into the holes on the side of your heads. We also have those holes on the sides of our heads but we don’t use them as much as you do. Maybe we should. Who knows? Anyway, let’s just be clear: our mouths, your ears, you’re welcome, we’re awesome. Done.

Sam has toothache and thinks that while naked in a shower he may have seen Nuno Mendes in a black speedo. James is one half of a ‘foodie power couple’, has a mate who lives in a haunted house and tells all about his Sam-less trip to the incredibly dated but seemingly quite wonderful Oslo Court. They ponder on taking TKIOF on the road, The Chicken Bloke, UFOs over Chichester and also get into the recent grim reports from the world of London restaurants.

Then Melissa Hemsley shows up and topics erupt all over the damn place. There’s church chat, Lego babble and porn on public transport….discussion. Melissa reveals her favourite sausage, cries in the Albert Hall and goes to war with squirrels.

These are sounds from three mouths, entering the ears of millions. A shared experience like no other. Wake up yeah? What else is there?

This week’s episode is sponsored by the Leathermen of the world of wine dropwine.co.uk and the Swiss Army Knives of the world of vodka ourvodka.com/ourlondon

Feb 03 2019

1hr 38mins

Play

Rank #19: Ep154: Sheds Of The Dead | Featuring restaurateur and chef Asma Khan

Podcast cover
Read more

Listen up people. This episode is not messing around. I mean, James and Sam do mess around briefly at the start to be fair. They babble on about over reacting to bad reviews, and how 'Bob' is regularly the name of gameshow hosts. Sam writes a nice tweet and James plays a great new TKIOF game 'Dead Or Alive'.

So there is that small portion of messing around.

Then Asma Khan arrives and the time for silly business is over.

The origin story herein is a darn epic. Taking in royalty, a fortress, cricket in the streets, the often sad reality for second born daughters and Asma's journey to today as the chef owner of the awesome Darjeeling Express in Soho and now the first chef from Britain featured on Netflix's 'Chef's Table'.

It's maybe a first for TickyOff....an episode that's pretty poignant, fascinating and possibly even quite moving...

Though maybe it's not a first and the 'Joey Trib' game regularly gets you all weepy....I dunno.

James and Sam pipe down and listen the hell up. I suggest you do the same.

This week's episode is sponsored by your booze buddies and mine:

dropwine.co.uk

and

ourvodka.com/ourlondon

Sep 23 2018

1hr 7mins

Play

Rank #20: Ep178: Hammer Or Mallet | Featuring writer and beer expert Melissa Cole

Podcast cover
Read more

It’s another week, another journey around Jupiter, another wax and wane of Europa, our favourite moon. This intergalactic road trip also provides human beings of Earth with another incredible episode of the TickyOff podcast. This week James has been roped into cooking bread with a bunch of children, only one of whom is related to him. Sam is ratty about a long, and to be fair somewhat dull, chat about the colour pink in restaurants. They discuss flashing, ‘Grief Is The Thing With Feathers’, noodles and ‘Us’. Then beer expert and writer Melissa Cole shows up with a cool box full of beer and things improve no end. Melissa rains down chat-honesty like a cloud bank of verbal truth has just blown in from the West…or something. She tells all about the grim idiocy of (some) in the craft beer world, changing demographics in beer drinking and drops more science than has ever been heard around these here TickyOff parts. There’s also time for nursery rhymes, the difficulties of recording the sounds of a live hawk, tarot cards and mediums, and Melissa explains the benefits of Sam turning his back on his beloved Budweiser…

This week’s episode is sponsored by the entirely hairless, three fingered, web footed wine experts at Dropwine.co.uk

Mar 31 2019

1hr 20mins

Play

Ep215: The Beamer - Part One | Featuring chef and restaurateur Gary Usher

Podcast cover
Read more

Hello. This is TickyOff. If you don’t know the drill by now then wake up. This is the 215th episode of this jazzy chat based ballyhoo and it’s a damn fine one. This week James opens huge with a long chat about an imaginary engine, goes to the pub with his children and has a weird obsession with doughnuts. Sam just about manages to equal this unbelievably top rate chat by de-icing cats, arguing with a customer about sourdough and possibly becoming pregnant. Then chef and restaurateur Gary Usher arrives and one of the great pyramidical mouthnoise structures is aurally created for you. Gary has had a chat with a cabbie, made himself redundant in his own business and came up short in a 'This Morning' screentest. He may also, possibly, have been watching ‘The Fugitive’ in the back seat of his car and/or eating sausages with a spoon. Like much of TickyOff, it’s a little unclear. Despite such weapons grade hilarity, this episode features some very honest reflections on regret, social media, the frustrations of the restaurant industry and taking responsibility. Episode two one five proves once more that there is pretty much nothing the TickyOff Boyz can’t deliver on the podcast stage. From addled nonsense to tearful confession, TickyOff is basically Amazon Prime for human emotion, just minus the awful working conditions and the fella with the naughty videos on his phone. Know this.

This week’s episode is sponsored by the Prime of wine dropwine.co.uk

Jan 26 2020

1hr 13mins

Play

Ep214: Gill Communication | Featuring chef and restaurateur Robin Gill

Podcast cover
Read more

This week on the end of the pier/end of the world podcast TickyOff, James and Sam are joined by Robin Gill, chef and restaurateur behind a whole bunch of fine restaurants including The Dairy, Darby’s, and Sorella. Robin has the ability to make sounds using his mouth and he puts this skill to perfect use on the podcast. Said sounds include opening his new place, proposing to his wife after one week, giving his son a very cool name and a discussion of the insanely good chorizo at Asador Etxebarri.

Before Robin appears, The TickyOff Boyz sell a whole bunch of joy, ride a horse while drunk and smoke at school. James goes to Silo, offends a charity for the blind and sucks pennies to avoid jail time. Sam reviews ‘1917’, previews Christopher Nolan’s new film ‘Tenet’ , looks at a slideshow of grim eye afflictions and considers just how similar Rasputin and Charles Manson looked.

All this top grade nonsense plus Irishmen with their own farms, Val Kilmer in ‘Willow’, Robin’s mashed potato tekkers and James gets called ‘a conker on a string’…..

This week’s episode is sponsored by the ‘chicken and egg question’ of the world of wine dropwine.co.uk

Jan 19 2020

1hr 12mins

Play

Ep213: Hands Of Wool | Featuring journalist Angela Hui

Podcast cover
Read more

Welcome to the year 2020, potentially the final year of mankind’s existence on Planet Earth. Along with cockroaches, scientists believe that the only creatures that could survive the coming apocalypse will be The TickyOff Boyz . It is unclear why they think this and how they expect one horse and one grumpy ghost obsessive to repopulate the planet. The TickyOff Two are however, willing to give it a try.

Before you all die though, here is Episode 213 to pour aurally into your ears. Vice and Time Out (among many others) journalist Angela Hui is here and she’s brought crisps. She’s also brought G Ramsay chat, Asian Flush yap and a portion of babble concerning a holy place, Chippy Alley in Cardiff. There’s also time for Sufjan Stevens, Greggs and the benefits to having woolly hands.

Before Angela arrives, James makes a stupidly boozy gravy, has a lovely pair of new boots and has started dressing like evil chucklehead Dominic Cummings. Sam meanwhile has a sushi and dog walking face off with the singer from Razorlight in Osaka. It’s quite the tale of fish and hounds.

This weeks episode is sponsored by wine knights of the apocalypse drop wine.co.uk

Jan 12 2020

1hr 1min

Play

Ep212: New Year's Eve | Featuring chef and restaurateur Richard Corrigan

Podcast cover
Read more

This is the New Year’s Eve special 2019. This is an episode with no intro. This is an episode in which Sam and James spray aural mouth noise around with a) abandon and b) Richard Corrigan of Bentley’s, Corrigan’s and his newest restaurant, Daffodil Mulligan.

Richard talks about opening in Shoreditch versus Mayfair, spoken word and traditional folk music, laziness in success, why he rides a flowery yellow moped and his love for young Dublin punk legends Fontaines DC.

There’s also room for Riverdance Disco, Sam plays pool with Coldplay, James has a terrifying lunch with Rowley Leigh, why real oystermen don’t eat oysters and Richard reveals his favourite pub in the world.

Finally, respects are paid to the much missed Gary Rhodes and Richard shares his tips for a proper NYE. The main takeaway being you should probably just go to Corrigan's Mayfair.

This week’s episode is sponsored by the Jools Hollands of wine dropwine.co.uk

Dec 31 2019

1hr 10mins

Play

Ep211: The Pod Of St John | Featuring Fergus Henderson and Trevor Gulliver

Podcast cover
Read more

For the 2019 TickyOff Christmas Special Sam and James have lunch with two absolute heroes; Fergus Henderson and Trevor Gulliver. Said lunch takes place at St John. For twenty five years, it is said that Fergus ‘puts it on the plate’ and Trevor ‘puts it in the glass’ at St John. Since before time began, The TickyOff Boyz have been said to ‘put it on the pod’. So a recording of the lunch has flat-out been put….on the pod.

Great quantities of wine are drunk, greater quantities of food are eaten. However, the substance in greatest supply during this feast, is chat. Solid gold festive chat.

Is that angels singing? No, it’s Fergus and Trevor’s origin story involving hotdogs at a dog track. Is that the sound of jingle bells….jingling? Nah, that’s Lee Tiernan yap, AA Gill discussion and Jonathan Gold babble. Ah, the gentle pop of chestnuts roasting on an open fire! Alas no, your ears deceive you, that’s James eating snails, Sam’s cat dying during recording and Fergus teaching the correct irrigation technique for Worcestershire sauce on a rarebit.

Other Christmas miracles on aural display include Paul Bocuse’s ever growing toque, stuffing as a Christmas lunch prep jazz moment, ‘Master And Commander’ and the serenity of bread sauce.

The TickyOff Boyz were and remain, very honoured and grateful to have been invited to lunch with two such legendary fellows. In much the same way as you are no doubt honoured and grateful to be able to listen in.

Happy Christmas dear listeners. We have love for you. In a way.

This week’s episode is sponsored by your very own Christmas miracles at dropwine.co.uk

RIP Ripley x

Dec 22 2019

2hr 6mins

Play

Ep210: Funky Wine At The Funeral | Featuring Passione Vino's Luca Dusi

Podcast cover
Read more

This week James has been mean to Sam. It’s unclear why but could have something to do with a chat about oysters and lemons that hasn’t even happened yet, but happens three weeks from now. It’s another example of the TickyOff Two bending time itself to their will. Or just misunderstanding how clocks and calendars and podcast release schedules work. That, like much of what they babble on about, is unclear.

Between dissing Sam, James has also found time to carry a coffin and make a lot of edgy, but hilarious, jokes at a funeral. Sam has been to the cinema and drops a fascinating review of ‘Knives Out’ direct into your ears.

They then depart TickyOff Towers and head off to Passione Vino, one of London’s greatest wine shops. There they meet up with proprietor Luca Dusi and get stuck into a lot of wine and even more chat.

Luca talks about joining the army, leaving Verona and why he has a fetish for gorgonzola. There’s a deep dive into the whole natural wine debate, a little cannibalism discussion and James regales all with an incredibly depressing Italian biscuit recipe.

All that classic chat vibe and yet there’s still time for Luca to heartily recommend a hard cheese as a precursor to….romance.

This week’s episode is sponsored by wine casanovas dropwwine.co.uk

Dec 15 2019

52mins

Play

Ep209: Bobby Additions | Featuring The Guardian's Bob Granleese

Podcast cover
Read more

Let’s open big here. Let’s open on a massive part of this week’s episode. Listen up listeners, this week.... James’s data problems continue! It’s a real nail-biting affair. It’s tough to follow that up I know but here goes.. Sam wonders whether people are actually nice and the pair of them wonder on what car chef Gary Usher drives. James apologises to Sam’s wife and Sam wants to know how many extras peed in the water on the set of ‘Titanic’.

Then Guardian food Lord Bob ‘Bobby’ Granleese arrives and basically erupts all over the place with his renowned brand of good cheer, positive mental attitude and all round smiley demeanour.

Bob chuckles up a storm about Mourinho to Tottenham, editing Will Self and being attacked by teenage fans of The Cure. He radiates joy and happiness concerning his new desk, the brilliance of the late Deborah Orr and he finally answers one of the longest running questions in TickyOff lore: Is Angela Hartnett stern?

These three titans of chat also try a microwave Rustler burger live on air, Sam meets a helicopter gunship pilot and James’s dead body gets left on a runway in Thailand.

This is pure TickyOff. Babble but better. The best a man (or woman) can get. Once listened, forever smitten. Wake up.

This week’s episode is sponsored by the Castrol GTX’s of wine dropwine.co.uk

Dec 08 2019

1hr 25mins

Play

Ep208: Portal In The Living Room | Featuring chef and restaurateur Marcus Samuelsson

Podcast cover
Read more

Another week, another episode of TickyOff. This week the damn Sam and the darn James open strong, with some scarf chat. The ground shakes at that level of chat. The seas boil with dialogue that powerful. A plague of locusts may well be released with mouthsounds so fascinating. There’s only one way to follow that up, and that’s with the long awaited return of GhostChat! Sam tells the usual scientifically-rigorous tale of a haunted suburban house in North Wales where a phone has gone missing, there is the stench of rotting flesh and it’s impossible to ascertain how many kids live in said house. Chilling.

Then all round big deal chef Marcus Samuelsson arrives and discusses his visits to football stadiums, why lingonberries are much better than cranberries and why paella is so tricky to make well. He also discusses slow expansion, what it was like coming up in the industry as a young black chef and how he learnt his love of cooking from his adoptive grandmother.

Finally, he describes cooking the first state dinner for Barack Obama, the benefits of cold water dips and why all food needs proper context to make sense.

This week’s episode is sponsored by the presidents of wine, dropwine.co.uk

Dec 01 2019

47mins

Play

Ep207: Sam Got Scammed | Featuring Byron Food Director Sophie Michell

Podcast cover
Read more

Great Danes, tiny bottles of rum, milkshaking and gerrymandering. On no other damn podcast would you get an array of subjects so bewitching within the first half hour. James and Sam also find time to exercise their mouthmuscles upon other equally as enticing topics such as Doncaster, Blur Vs Oasis, citizens arrests and their love for Emile restaurant. Oh, and they explain in great detail exactly what 'browning the cream' means. What that immortal phrase means for you, and the rest of humanity.

Then chef and new Byron Food Director Sophie Michell basically arrives at TickyOff Towers and things take a turn for the more interesting and less idiotic. There’s the violence and sexism of old school kitchens, the madness of night shift hotel cooks, and the deep sadness of James getting bullied by Jean-Christophe Novelli.

Plus, tall poppy syndrome, turning around a troubled brand, moving to Beirut, private cheffing for Claudia Schiffer and a long pondering on which Batman you’d most want to hang out with.

It’s TickyOff, and it’s just brilliant isn’t it?

This week’s episode is sponsored by the Batman and the Robin of wine drinks, dropwine.co.uk

www.tickyoff.com

#browningthecream

Nov 22 2019

1hr 19mins

Play

Ep206: A Naughty Biscuit | Featuring restaurateur Will Lander

Podcast cover
Read more

Upon this week, upon this episode, James and Sam are drunk.

James has drunk a stein of beer, Sam has been watching 'The Martian'. Despite these issues, they've also managed to create a website www.tickyoff.com and have begun plotting the world's first ever TickyOff Awards.

Then Will Lander of Quality Chop House, Portland and Clipstone fame (among others) arrives and this wondrous triple mouth threat go deep on expansion, retail, wine, The Portland Pivot, backing talented chefs and having a wine expert for a mother.

There's also a very long discussion of 'El Camino: A Breaking Bad Story', a pondering on whether or not a banana is proof of God's existence and Sam once more thinks pork chops are dry....

This episode is sponsored by your wine friends and mine, dropwine.co.uk

Nov 17 2019

1hr 22mins

Play

Ep 205: A Bed Full Of Spiders | Featuring Mangal 2's Ferhat Dirik

Podcast cover
Read more

This week on mankind’s very greatest greatest achievement, The Goddamn TickyOff Boyz are joined by Ferhat Dirik, twitter legend, operator of Mangal 2 (Hands down one of the best restaurants in London). Ferhat opens his mouth and sounds basically fall out. These sounds concern, expansion, taking over a family business, Gilbert and George, why he hates his house and his very sneaky visits to Padella.

Before Ferhat arrives, James and Sam begin plotting the first TickyOff Awards 2019, wonder when one is officially middle aged and Sam apologizes to a previous guest…

Plus, there’s the perils of working with Deliveroo, questions from Twitter and the most underrated dishes you should be ordering at Mangal 2.

This episode is sponsored by wine gods dropwine.co.uk

Nov 10 2019

1hr 9mins

Play

Ep204: Stevie Bought A Hawk | Featuring chef and restaurateur Stevie Parle

Podcast cover
Read more

This week Sam and James get straight into the biggest issues currently facing humankind/themselves. Namely, how many murderers listen to TickyOff, whether or not food should ever make an appearance in the bedroom, whether James is scared of anything whatsoever and what happens if you throw eggs at space shuttles. James also drops a powerful review of ‘Joker’ and Sam has seen some sharks swimming by a nuclear power station.

After an opening like that, there’s only one person who could possibly stand toe to toe, aurally, with the TickyOff Two. That person is chef and restaurateur Stevie ‘Steve’ Parle. Stevie tells his tale from Ballymaloe cooking school, to the River Cafe, to opening Dock Kitchen, closing Rotorino and opening Pastaio at Westfield. He also shares the beauty of Japanese builders, the difficulties of setting the right tone in a kitchen and he provides an in depth recipe for his favourite Italian soup.

There’s also time for a long chat about colours, some glove discussion and some dried bean banter.

It’s TickyOff and be honest, there is nothing even close to as wonderful as this in any of your lives.

This week’s episode is sponsored by wine pedlars of great repute dropwine.co.uk

Nov 03 2019

1hr 16mins

Play

Ep203: Herman The Merman | Featuring chef and fish butcher Josh Niland

Podcast cover
Read more

This week’s episode is brought to you by the letter F. There’s fish, fascinating chat, and the vast majority is fool-free because Sam isn’t here. He is around for the intro however where he discusses his beautiful hair and the time he had to kill a mouse humanely. In a verbal parry back at those incredible yap thrusts, James makes mouth sounds about his glamorous visit to the Observer Food Monthly Awards and also seemingly has no idea whatsoever about which animals live in canals.

Things improve no end once this week’s guest Josh Niland arrives. James takes on the renowned chef and fish butcher one on one, face en face, mano a horse..o. Josh shares some unbelievable fish based knowledge such as how to make fish fat ice cream, crackers from fish eyeballs and mortadella from fish sperm. He also explains why water is the enemy of decent fish, how to write a book in a couple of months alongside two toddlers, a newborn baby and a hectic business and he also takes some questions from Twitter.

It’s not your usual TickyOff in that it’s pretty damn informative, sensible and near enough entirely ghost-less. Take this information and do what you will with it. I am not the boss of you.

This week’s episode is sponsored by winemongers dropwine.co.uk

Oct 27 2019

52mins

Play

Ep202: Fairground By Simply Red | Featuring Oklava and Kyseri chef-owner Selin Kiazim

Podcast cover
Read more

Guess what’s on fire? That’s right, the planet is. You can also add ‘The Kitchen’ to that flaming hot list. I feel like I’ve made that joke before. I’d look back and check but I can’t. I am a shark and I cannot reverse.

This week The TickyOff Boyz utterly fail to deliver an intro to the episode. This is because they were in the pub. Sometimes, these things happen. I’d apologise but to be honest, water meet underside of the bridge. Bygones. Etc.

Anyway you don’t need an intro when you’ve got Selin Kiazim in the house* *It’s not a house. It’s an office. Just for full disclosure. Selin tells all about how she ended up owning and running two (and a half) restaurants, writing a cookbook and appearing on ‘Great British Menu’. There’s Peter Gordon at The Providores chat, modernising the food of her childhood discussion and operating in a tricky business environment…..verbals.

Meanwhile James drops an enormous jug of Bloody Mary mix on a train platform, Sam explains competitive hot-dog eating contest technicalities and Selin admits that the cooking show that inspired her to start cooking may well have involved a pair of legends known as The TickyOff Boyz of the early nineties, Gary Rhodes and Ainsley Harriot.

This week’s episode is sponsored by The TickyOff Boyz of wine dropwine.co.uk

Oct 20 2019

1hr 2mins

Play

Ep201: The Food Of Sichuan | Featuring Chinese food expert and author Fuchsia Dunlop

Podcast cover
Read more

After last week and the incredible staging of their own (podcast) deaths, James and Sam return to the usual ballyhoo and tomfoolery that has defined them for decades now. They turn their backs on the wondrous illusions and, if we’re being entirely honest, pure magic of last week and leave that to the likes of David Copperfield, Paul Daniels and that weird uncle you only ever met at birthday parties who had a cup with a vanishing ball in it and a multi-coloured hankerchief and subscriptions to….magazines and wore brown trousers and drove a 1970’s sedan car even though it was 1992. You know the sort.

Anyway, this week Chinese food expert and author Fuchsia Dunlop arrives in TickyOff Towers and explains how she became said expert and wrote a number of cookbooks including Sam’s all time favourite. She schools our heroic pair on stir frying tekkers, the city of Chengdu and explains why she once set her own cookbook on fire. Before Fuchsia shows up James has had a birthday, Pidgin has come up with a bad dish, they talk a bunch about spaetzle and ponder on a huge question: Can any fish reverse?

This week’s episode is sponsored by the Siegfried and Roy of wine delivery, dropwine.co.uk

Oct 05 2019

1hr

Play

Ep200: The End Part Two | Featuring The TickyOff Boyz

Podcast cover
Read more

So this is it. The end of the line. Game over. Butch and Sundance going out in a blaze of glory or John Virgo and Jim Davidson going their separate ways after ‘Big Break’ is not renewed for another series of brilliant snooker themed light entertainment.

The TickyOff Boys have towered over the world of podcasts for decades now. The awards too numerous to mention (Three Nobel Peace Prizes, a Field’s Medal in advanced mathematics, four A* at A-Level, a fifty metre swimming badge, Most Improved Player Chichester City Colts 1989, Horse Rear Of The Year 2001 and many many more too numerous to mention such as Grand National Winner 1974, Miss World 1980, 1981, 1982, Largest Marrow Widnes County Council Allotment Fete 2002, Grammy awards for best packaging and best guitar solo on a Latin Salsa track, WWF Wrestlemania Tag Team Champions 1988, and other awards far too numerous to mention).

It’s time for them to pass the torch, hand over the baton, step aside, let others attempt their own journeys to the very peak of human achievement via the medium of a vaguely food based podcast. They go out as they came in, talking nonsense, delivering great wisdom and basically keeping it so real that reality itself somehow becomes even more real than humankind ever believed it could be in reality…..

In this emotional final farewell, James wants to kill cats and had a terrible salad at his own wedding. Sam really wants a hug from a prior podcast guest and is afraid of trampolines. There is a long and involved discussion about horse feet, why you shouldn’t kiss your Dad on the lips and they finally answer a question TickyOff fans have asked for years: What do you wear in bed?

There’s also time for a long promised deep dive into why Magpie failed, Dame Barbara Cartland and some discussion about piles.

This was TickyOff and one day the true majestic wonder of it will be studied and appreciated by the human/alien hybrids that will rule Planet Earth millennia from now. The TickyOff Boyz accept the gratitude and the love of you all. We know what we have provided, how much we have raised up civilisation. We are very humble human/God people. You’re welcome.

This week’s episode is sponsored by wine providers to the stars dropwine.co.uk

Sep 29 2019

1hr 8mins

Play

Ep199: Animal Crossing | Featuring cookbook author MiMi Aye

Podcast cover
Read more

Guess who’s back this week for their second bite of a TickyOff shaped apple? MiMi Aye, that’s who. MiMi is back to talk up an aural storm about her new book ‘Mandalay’, family trees, Twitter beefs and eating chicken on Burmese trains. Meanwhile, James regularly risks decapitation on trains to Yorkshire, has an Apple Watch and is a huge fan of ‘The Princess Bride’. Plus, Sam doesn’t enjoy the music of Prince, discusses the physics of ice skates and reveals that his Nan used to buy him some very unsuitable music when he was a kid….

Somehow Episode 199 also features a vast array of celebrities including Rutger Hauer, Nigella Lawson, Ryan Reynolds, Jet Li and David Bowie. If that ain't a TickyOff-shaped dinner party, I don’t know what is.

This week’s episode is sponsored by the atom splitters of wine delivery dropwine.co.uk

Sep 22 2019

52mins

Play

Ep198: Provable Idiocy | Featuring writer, photographer and baker Dan Lepard

Podcast cover
Read more

Albert Einstein. Marie Curie. Paul Daniels. All incredible scientists whose insights and incredible brains pushed humankind to ever greater heights. Add to this absolutely legendary braintrust two further names, James Of Ramsden and Sam O’Herlihy AKA The Gawddarn TickyOff Boyz. The reason their names deserve to sit alongside the science nerds named above? This episode of TickyOff.

Who else could conceive of a ghost named Derek? Who else could open a sandwich shop yesterday? Who else could slag off a beloved steak based restaurateur this much? Who else can update the humble fork to a new and spectacular level?

Get those wacky Nobel folk on the phone, The TickyOff Boyz just ordered a few Peace Prizes and a bag of medals. To go. Wake up.

This week esteemed baker, writer, photographer and general Flour Lord Dan Lepard is here. Dan creates mouth sounds for your ears on topics ranging from learning before the internet, eating at other people’s houses, wanting more anger in food writing and why restaurants should maybe stop trying to bake their own damn bread. The three mouths available for this week’s episode also get into the problem with ‘cucina povera’, food as a psychedelic drug, the world marmalade awards and the genealogy of classic restaurant dishes.

I get it, this much incredible content has probably already melted your grey brains out through your earholes but guess what? There’s even more packed in here, like a porky farce in a chicken’s chest cavity. Sam thinks he might have seen the Turin Shroud, Dan visits a number of Turin adult cinemas and James wonders on a decision with planet destroying possibilities:

Is it time for them to quit The Tickyoff for good?……..

This week’s episode is sponsored by the really lovely and kind people at dropwine.co.uk

Sep 15 2019

1hr 17mins

Play

Ep197: The Secrets Of Dishoom | Featuring group executive chef Naved Nasir

Podcast cover
Read more

This week on Thee TickyOff Sam and James get straight into vast, slab-like topics such as James’s son’s first day of school, a weird/nice message on Instagram and the stressfest that is opening Sons + Daughters. James is so British he makes his own daughter poorly and Sam may have seen his first actual real-life, scientifically undeniable GHOST!!! It’s a hell of a Devon based tale.

Then Dishoom’s Naved Nasir arrives and the three mouths on aural display, display sounds (again, aurally) to your ears in a non-visual, an aural, manner. Naved dishes all on his origin story, giving away his recipe secrets in the new Dishoom cookbooks, building a great company culture and keeping control of an ever expanding menu. He also gets into how it feels to run such busy restaurants while maintaining what first attracted guests through the doors.

This week’s episode is sponsored by wine chaps/fellows/gents dropwine.co.uk

Sep 09 2019

1hr 10mins

Play

Ep196: Eating Peacock | Featuring journalist and broadcaster Giles Coren

Podcast cover
Read more

Firstly a little note, our mighty sandwich shop Sons + Daughters opens soon in Kings Cross! Listen to this episode on the way there and you may hear word of a TICKYOFF FAN EXCLUSIVE OFFER!!!

Now, on with the babble….

Guess who’s back? A bunch of easily preventable diseases? Correct. Anti-vaxers, a plague upon yer unvaccinated houses. Fascism? Correct. Fascists are, much like love is in mega hit ‘Love Is All Around’ by Wet Wet Wet, all around. Twee and dull indie pop band Bombay Bicycle Club? Yep. I was surprised too, but they are indeed back and dropping some more twee and dull indie pop 'bangers' as we speak.

In a world where awful things keep coming back, we need something amazing to come back. Something magnificent and brilliant and mindblowing. Something like the goddamn TickyOff Boyz packing another galaxy humping episode of the solar system’s favourite podcast* The Goddamn TickyOff.

*We checked, and aliens think all that NPR nonsense, and Maron, and that buff fella and the freakynomics chap all SUUUUUCCCCKKK. We are massive in Saturn and could not be bigger on Pluto. Don’t write in to our email address that I’ve forgotten to tell me: ‘Oh well actually Pluto isn’t classified as a planet now actually I think you’ll find actually’. Because if I could remember the damn login then I’d reply: ‘Actually, don’t be unkind to Pluto. you can’t take that designation away just because someone cleaned the lens on Hubble and found that Pluto was actually just some birdmess on the glass that made it appear as if there was a planet there. That’s incredibly mean to them and at this point considering what we’re doing to Earth I’d say that our rock barely still qualifies as a planet too so pipe down planetary nomenclature pedant!’

Well, that really went somewhere.

Anyway, this week the Boyz slip right into some pig offal chat, Yorkie bars, holiday romances and the merits of cargo pants. James is irritated by a French fishmonger and Sam tries to impress a girl by killing someone.

If that wasn’t controversial enough Giles Coren shows up and……is Giles Coren. Unrepentant, Gary Lineker dissing, risotto loathing, music hating, peacock eating Giles Coren. He’s back from Greece, might be a secret vegan and while he may not enjoy eating dormice, he’s not shy of putting down a peacock or two.

This is what you’ve been missing all summer. While the world burned itself and its moral compass to cinders, The TickyOff was just waiting for its moment to return, like a soothing aural salve for the grim ills of humanity. Sound based Savlon for the sore graze of humankind. You don’t get that from bloody Maron now do you? Wake up.

This week’s episode is sponsored by intergalactic wine pedlars dropwine.co.uk

Sep 01 2019

1hr 39mins

Play

iTunes Ratings

36 Ratings
Average Ratings
28
8
0
0
0

so nice

By Azzzoo - Nov 01 2019
Read more
I love it .I am Aziza from Libya

Great

By christc101eats - May 16 2017
Read more
This podcast is as good as Pidgin, which was a highlight of my recent trip to London