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Rank #5 in Management category

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Management

Coaching for Leaders

Updated 2 months ago

Rank #5 in Management category

Business
Education
Careers
Management
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Leaders aren’t born, they’re made. This Monday show helps you discover leadership wisdom through insightful conversations. Independently produced weekly since 2011, Dr. Dave Stachowiak brings perspective from a thriving, global leadership academy, plus more than 15 years of leadership at Dale Carnegie. Bestselling authors, expert researchers, deep conversation, and regular dialogue with listeners have attracted 15 million downloads and the #1 search result for coaching on Apple Podcasts. Activate your FREE membership to search the entire episode library by topic at CoachingforLeaders.com

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Leaders aren’t born, they’re made. This Monday show helps you discover leadership wisdom through insightful conversations. Independently produced weekly since 2011, Dr. Dave Stachowiak brings perspective from a thriving, global leadership academy, plus more than 15 years of leadership at Dale Carnegie. Bestselling authors, expert researchers, deep conversation, and regular dialogue with listeners have attracted 15 million downloads and the #1 search result for coaching on Apple Podcasts. Activate your FREE membership to search the entire episode library by topic at CoachingforLeaders.com

iTunes Ratings

757 Ratings
Average Ratings
672
44
16
14
11

Great!

By tommye w-c - Mar 17 2020
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Incredible coaching and advice for leaders!

Useful podcast

By Angscreed - Mar 09 2020
Read more
It provides a secure and digestible way to coach self and others.

iTunes Ratings

757 Ratings
Average Ratings
672
44
16
14
11

Great!

By tommye w-c - Mar 17 2020
Read more
Incredible coaching and advice for leaders!

Useful podcast

By Angscreed - Mar 09 2020
Read more
It provides a secure and digestible way to coach self and others.
Cover image of Coaching for Leaders

Coaching for Leaders

Latest release on Aug 03, 2020

Read more

Leaders aren’t born, they’re made. This Monday show helps you discover leadership wisdom through insightful conversations. Independently produced weekly since 2011, Dr. Dave Stachowiak brings perspective from a thriving, global leadership academy, plus more than 15 years of leadership at Dale Carnegie. Bestselling authors, expert researchers, deep conversation, and regular dialogue with listeners have attracted 15 million downloads and the #1 search result for coaching on Apple Podcasts. Activate your FREE membership to search the entire episode library by topic at CoachingforLeaders.com

Rank #1: 223: Start With Why, with Simon Sinek

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Simon Sinek: Start with Why* and Leaders Eat Last*
Questions from Mastermind members:

How do you make these ideas part of the operating culture of the organization? —Mike
I have listened to Simon's book, Why Leaders Eat Last. Simon provided a lot of examples of what he calls the circle of safety. His philosophy and ideas are rational. Does he have data to support that getting buy in on his philosophy is actually good for business by reducing costs or increasing profits? —Chris

Quotes
Companies should not be deciding their purpose or cause based on market research. That’s like a politician deciding what their vision is based on poll numbers.
—Simon Sinek

The first step to becoming that leader we wish we had is to actually want to be the leader.
—Simon Sinek

It’s about all about purpose and creating strong human relationships, and learning your “Why” gives you a massive advantage in decision-making.
—Simon Sinek

Fulfillment comes through service to others. When we make it about ourselves, it never really works. When we make it about others, it really feels amazing.
—Simon Sinek

If your kid has a bad report card, you don’t put him up for adoption, you get him a tutor. If someone has performance issues at the company, you don’t fire them, you coach them.
—Simon Sinek

Leadership is a process, and it requires commitment.
—Simon Sinek

The only way to find out if it will work is to do it.
—Simon Sinek

Leaders are not responsible for the numbers; leaders are responsible for the people responsible for the numbers.
—Simon Sinek
Resources

Book: Start with Why: How Great Leaders Inspire Everyone to Take Action* by Simon Sinek
Book: Leaders Eat Last* by Simon Sinek
TED talk: How great leaders inspire action

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

Dec 14 2015

39mins

Play

Rank #2: 337: Six Tactics for Extraordinary Performance, with Morten Hansen

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Morten Hansen: Great at Work
Morten Hansen is a management professor at University of California, Berkeley. He is the coauthor with Jim Collins of the New York Times bestseller Great by Choice and the author of the new book Great at Work: How Top Performers Do Less, Work Better, and Achieve More*.
Key Points
The Six Tactics:

Carve out the 15
Chunk it
Measure the soft
Get feedback
Dig the dip
Confront the stall point

Other Points:

Focus on one skill you want to prove.
Meetings should only be for debate, not status updates.
Having a coach is great, but often you can coach yourself if you only focus on one thing at a time.

Resources Mentioned

Great at Work* by Morten Hansen
Great by Choice* by Jim Collins and Morten T. Hansen

Book Notes
Download my highlights from Great at Work in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

CFL31: Five Effective Ways to Train the People You Lead (episode 31)
CFL157: Why It’s Essential To Struggle With Learning (episode 157)
CFL181: Create the Best Place to Work, with Ron Friedman (episode 181)
CFL273: Essentials of Adult Development, with Mindy Danna (episode 273)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

Feb 19 2018

38mins

Play

Rank #3: 306: Five Steps to Hold People Accountable, with Jonathan Raymond

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Jonathan Raymond: Good Authority
Jonathan Raymond is the founder of Refound, a firm that believes we should all be aiming for more Yoda and less Superman. He is the author of the book, Good Authority: How to Become the Leader Your Team Is Waiting For*.

Many managers and leaders recognize when more accountability is needed, but few use a process that invites high performance and embraces the whole person. In his work at Refound, Jonathan invites leaders to imagine a world where personal and professional growth are one thing, and where improving your relationships and owning your strengths translate directly into the rest of your life.

In this conversation, Jonathan teaches us a common language around accountability that works for almost everyone. Plus, he teaches us the five key steps of the accountability dial.
Key Points

Micromanagement is focused on tasks, but accountability is focused on relationships.
Accountability doesn’t work unless there’s a context of personal caring.
Employees want growth, and growth comes from productive discomfort. If you if you orient your day towards acknowledgment only on the positive side, you’re missing the better part of it.

The 5 Steps of the Accountability Dial:

The Mention
The Invitation
The Conversation
The Boundary
The Limit

Resources Mentioned

Good Authority: How to Become the Leader Your Team Is Waiting For* by Jonathan Raymond
Download the Accountability Dial
Refound (Jonathan's Firm)

Book Notes
Download my highlights from Good Authority in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

How to Create Team Guidelines, with Susan Gerke (episode 192)
New Management Practices of Leading Organizations, with David Burkus (episode 253)
Moving Beyond Command and Control, with Brian Robertson (episode 258)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

Jul 17 2017

43mins

Play

Rank #4: 148: The Four Critical Stories Leaders Need For Influence, with David Hutchens

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David Hutchens: The Storytelling Leaders
Leaders often hear about influence through storytelling, but don't know where to start. David Hutchens shares four stories to tell and how to get started.

“It’s more important to tell a strategic story, to tell the right story, even if you don’t tell it particularly well.” -David Hutchens

The starting point of telling stories is permission

Storytelling is a skill that nobody really has to learn since it’s our natural language

Leaders needs to give themselves permission to tell a story in their organization

The 4 stories leaders need to tell

Who we are stories - what it means to be us

Think about the stories parents and caregivers told you when you were young about what it was like growing up for them
When we do this, we impart information about what we believe and who we are today
Every organization and team has an origin story
David shared the origin story of General Electric
A story from a leader always has a reason for telling it
What are the identity and origin stories that you have?
Vision stories - the future we desire

These stories should be told in present tense language
You can tell a story about somebody else that is already doing what it is you envision
You might tell a story about someone else if it’s a big jump from where the organization is today
Values in action stories - how the espoused values show up in our organization

David mentioned Zappos and the stories they create about customer service
The stories being told also affect how members of the organization make future choices
The right story should reconnect people with why they really care about this work
Change and learning stories - the stories about a time we tried something and learned from it

This is generally the hardest story to tell
Think about the leaders you’ve loved and appreciated the most (the best ones do this well)
These stories can build culture and loyalty
David shared the failure story of New Coke
Here’s the structure:

I tried something
Here’s the bad result I got
Here’s why I got that bad result
Here’s how I’m now changing my behavior so I get a better result next time
Don’t try to change your voice and be a professional storyteller: talk like you
Resources Mentioned

GO Team program*
Leadership Story Deck* by David Hutchens
Circle of the 9 Muses: A Storytelling Field Guide for Innovators and Meaning Makers* by David Hutchens
David’s email: David@DavidHutchens.com

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

Jul 07 2014

39mins

Play

Rank #5: 192: How to Create Team Guidelines, with Susan Gerke

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Susan Gerke: Go Team Resources
Susan was last appeared on three prior shows:

21: Your Strengths and Blind Spots
138: The Four Unique Types of Teams
139: How To Maximize Team Performance

You can discover more about Susan and her training materials at Go Team Resources.

On a true team, the work is all integrated.

Don’t create guidelines yourself and give them to the team.

A starting point for how to create team guidelines is what did not work well on a previous team.

“The dialogue that happens while team guidelines are being created is almost the highest value thing that happens.” -Susan Gerke

It’s important to have everyone present at a team meeting.

Creating operating guidelines is really foundational work for a team.

If you don’t do these kinds of things for your team, where do you go when you’re struggling?

How to keep it visible:

Don’t go past 8 guidelines for a team
Have a team rate themselves on each item immediately
Assess the same number a regular meetings (monthly and then quarterly)
Make changes along the way, but use a structured process
Disagreement is the sign of a healthy team

We also mentioned Susan’s business partner David Hutchens, who appeared on episode 148: The Four Stories Leaders Need For Influence
Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

May 11 2015

39mins

Play

Rank #6: 271: How to Increase Your Conversational Intelligence, with Judith Glaser

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Judith Glaser: Conversational Intelligence
Judith Glaser is an Organizational Anthropologist. She is one of the most pioneering and innovative change agents, consultants, and executive coaches, in the consulting industry and is the world’s leading authority on Conversational Intelligence, Neuro-innovation, and WE-centric Leadership. She is a best-selling author of seven business books including her newest best seller Conversational Intelligence: How Great Leaders Build Trust and Get Extraordinary Results.
Key Points

Great conversation leads to great relationships, which leads to great culture.
Level I conversations are about resistance
Level II conversations are about “wait and see“
Level III conversations are about co-creation
When we are threatened by others, cortisol can linger for 26 hours.
Children have the same capacity for conversational intelligence that adults do, but only if we have the courage to nurture their growth.

Resources Mentioned

Conversational Intelligence by Judith Glaser
Conversational Intelligence website

Activate Your Free Coaching for Leaders Membership
Get immediate access to my free, 10-day audio course, 10 Ways to Empower the People You Lead. Give me 10 minutes a day for 10 days to get the most immediate, practical actions to become a better leader. Join at CoachingforLeaders.com.
Related Episodes

CFL91: How to Listen When Someone is Venting
CFL161: How To Address Difficult Conversations
CFL177: How to Start a Conversation With Anyone

Next Episode
Murial Maignan Wilkins appears to help us discover how to improve our executive presence. She’s the co-author of the book Own the Room: Discover Your Signature Voice to Master Your Leadership Presence.
Thank You
Submit your question for consideration on the next question and answer show the first Monday of every month at http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback

Nov 14 2016

37mins

Play

Rank #7: 161: How To Address Difficult Conversations

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Bonni and I respond to questions from the Coaching for Leaders community on how to handle difficult conversations and more.
Guest: Bonni Stachowiak
Teaching in Higher Ed

Question from Leonardo
I´m one of your fans, I listen your podcast every day and I see better results on my day job managing an emergency room in Brazilian Hospital. I'm a cardiologist and today I work as a manger also. I was listening the episode 143, about feedback, while I was driving to my job and I was thinking how difficult to me is receive a negative feedback. I think that what struggle in this situation is emotion and controlling the emotion to respond or give some excuse for that negative perception. When I give any feedback to my employees I saw this same problem. How do I train myself to be better on that?

Episode #143: Accepting Feedback With Sheila Heen of Difficult Conversations
Episode #107: Three Steps To Soliciting Feedback with Tom Henschel
Lets Get Real Or Let's Not Play by Mahan Khalsa*

Question from Dow

Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, Sheila Heen*
The Dale Carnegie Course
How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie*
Positive Coaching by Jim Thompson*

Question from Nathan
I am not currently in a "leadership" position but I feel that I am being called to leadership and feel that leadership and coaching is something that I would enjoy long term. I wanted to ask what recommendations you would have to really start moving in this direction and to start developing those skills. I've been trying to read books and listen to podcast to get some insight but haven't really had the opportunity to hone these skills. I am looking at going to toastmasters to get some experience/training in public speaking to get started working on something I don't feel I'm strong in. Do you have any recommendations of things like Toastmasters that I can check out or any suggestions on steps I could take to improve my leadership and coaching skills?

Toastmasters
Junior Chamber International (Jaycees)

Feedback

Join the conversation: http://coachingforleaders.com/161
Comments, questions, or feedback for future Q&A shows: http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback
Next Q&A show is episode #165 on Networking

Thank you to weekly update subscribers Jane Stachowiak, Melissa Minneci, Nick Smith, Adam Trainque, Jared Weikum, Guto Nicolazzi, Susan Smith, Federico De Obeso, Eduardo Mifano, John Mihalyo, Neil, Marcus Wallace, Adriana Ramirez, Tim Hill, Richard Carter, Clayton Dumcum, Jared Gonzalez, M. Key, Chris Bazille, Aaron Saray, Scott Bray, Chris Bean, Carina Costa, Shaun Ng, Rodney Freeman, Dow Tippett, Tom Kennedy, Kevin Lease, Jennifer Hammonds, David Kane, Francisco Prezoto, Marcia Roberts, Sharon Sauro, and Jennifer Mueller.

Receive the 10 Leadership Books That Will Help You Get Better Results From Others, including 2 books that I rely on weekly. You can subscribe at http://coachingforleaders.com/subscribe

Thank you also to David Wissore for leaving a written review on Stitcher and Eve Oliveira for leaving a written review on iTunes. If you've been listening to this show for a bit and feel like you can provide an honest review, kindly visit iTunes or Stitcher and leave a written review for the show. Thank you in advance!

Oct 06 2014

Play

Rank #8: 237: These Coaching Questions Get Results, with Michael Bungay Stanier

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Michael Bungay Stanier: The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More, and Change the Way You Lead Forever*
Quotes
I think there are as many definitions for coaching as there are people selling coaching.
—Michael Bungay Stanier

Slow down on the advice giving, and stay curious just a little bit longer.
—Michael Bungay Stanier

That’s part of the nature of a system; as soon you start changing stuff, it starts pushing back.
—Michael Bungay Stanier

Your organization is a system, and the very nature of a system is to love its own system.
—Michael Bungay Stanier

You want people to become lazy coaches … lazy because you want the other person to be doing the work. When they’re doing the work, they’re actually unlocking their own potential … you’re helping them to learn, rather than teaching them.
—Michael Bungay Stanier

We’re all okay with saying no to the stuff we don’t really want to do, but do we have the courage and discipline to say no to the stuff we do want to do?
—Michael Bungay Stanier
Feedback

Comments, questions, or feedback for future question and answer shows: http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback
The next question and answer show is episode 239

Applications are again open for membership in the Coaching for Leaders Mastermind. Membership details and how to apply can be found at this link:

http://coachingforleaders.com/mastermind

Applications will close promptly on April 1, 2016.

Want to be featured as a member spotlight on a future episode? If so, visit http://coachingforleaders.com/spotlight

Please join my weekly leadership guide. The leadership guide is delivered to your inbox each Wednesday and includes my thoughts and recommendations on the best articles, podcasts, videos, and books to support your development between shows. It also includes a brief overview and link to the full weekly show notes.

As a bonus, when you join the weekly leadership guide, you’ll get immediate access to my readers' guide listing the 10 leadership books that will help you get better results from others, with brief summaries from me on the value of each book. Download the 11-page readers' guide and 9-minute video of these book recommendations at http://coachingforleaders.com/subscribe
Thank You
Thank you to Trishul Patel and Adam the Educator for the kind reviews on iTunes. If you would like to post a review as well, it's a huge help in the growth of the Coaching for Leaders community. If you use iTunes, just visit http://coachingforleaders.com/itunes – and thank you in advance for your support!

Mar 21 2016

42mins

Play

Rank #9: 104: How To Maintain Control When Completely Overwhelmed

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It’s a busy time of the year for many of us and perhaps you’re struggling with overwhelm recently and#8211; or maybe you feel out of control already. On today’s show, you’ll discover how to maintain control when completely overwhelmed.

Sep 02 2013

Play

Rank #10: 358: How to Lead Meetings That Get Results, with Mamie Kanfer Stewart

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Mamie Kanfer Stewart: Momentum
Mamie Kanfer Stewart is the founder and CEO of Meeteor, a global venture providing meeting management solutions. She’s the author along with Tai Tsao of the book Momentum: Creating Effective, Engaging, and Enjoyable Meetings*.
Key Points
Six reasons we have meetings:

Connect
Align
Decide
Ideate/Brainstorm
Plan
Produce

Three kinds of people that are involved in a meeting are people who need to be:

Consulted
Informed
Engaged

Resources Mentioned

Download the first chapter of Momentum
The Modern Manager podcast
Momentum: Creating Effective, Engaging, and Enjoyable Meetings*

Book Notes
Download my highlights from Momentum in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

How to Create Team Guidelines, with Susan Gerke (episode 192)
How to Maximize Standing Meetings and More Questions, with Bonni Stachowiak (episode 212)
The Way to Conduct One-on-Ones, with Zvi Band (episode 246)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

Jun 25 2018

39mins

Play

Rank #11: 282: How to Motivate People, with Dan Ariely

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Dan Ariely: Payoff
Dan Ariely is the James B. Duke Professor of Psychology and Behavioral Economics at Duke University and a founding member of the Center for Advanced Hindsight. His books include Irrationally Yours, Predictably Irrational, The Upside of Irrationality, The (Honest) Truth About Dishonesty, and his most recent book, Payoff: The Hidden Logic That Shapes Our Motivations.
Key Points

The things that motivate us are about accomplishment and achievement, not day-to-day happiness.
Most people realize that they themselves are not truly motivated by money, but they still assume other people are completely motivated by it.
Figure out a way to pay people that adds to the development of a long-term relationship, not a short-term transactional one.
It is important to find a way to connect people’s jobs to the final outcome of their work, because many people don’t feel connected to their organization’s main purpose.

Resources Mentioned

Payoff: The Hidden Logic That Shapes Our Motivations* by Dan Ariely
Predictably Irrational* by Dan Ariely
Drive* by Daniel Pink
www.danariely.com

Book Notes
Download my highlights from Payoff in PDF format (free membership required).
Activate Your Free Coaching for Leaders Membership
Get immediate access to my free, 10-day audio course, 10 Ways to Empower the People You Lead. Give me 10 minutes a day for 10 days to get the most immediate, practical actions to become a better leader. Join at CoachingforLeaders.com.
Related Episodes

CFL84: Daniel Pink on To Sell is Human
CFL181: Create the Best Place to Work
CFL251: What to Do When Somebody Quits
CFL253: New Management Practices of Leading Organizations
CFL276: Employee Engagement With Management 3.0

Next Episode
Bonni and I return for the monthly question and answer show. Submit your question for consideration next week or for the first question and answer show the first Monday of every month at http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback
Thank You
Thank you to Greg Hall and Chase Batt here in the States and Lynn Wang in Hong Kong for the kind reviews on iTunes. To leave a rating or review, visit http://coachingforleaders.com/itunes

Jan 30 2017

35mins

Play

Rank #12: 177: How to Start a Conversation With Anyone

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Mark Sieverkropp walks through six steps that will help all of us start a conversation with anyone, anywhere.

Mark Sieverkropp
Author, How to Start a Conversation With Anyone
Mark and I were both featured by Forbes as 25 Professional Networking Experts to Watch in 2015

1. First Impressions last the longest

John Corcoran spoke in episode 169 on what we can do to recover from a bad first impression

2. Practice the type of listening that makes a difference

“...if you aspire to be a good conversationalist, be an attentive listener. To be interesting, be interested. Ask questions that other persons will enjoy answering. Encourage them to talk about themselves and their accomplishments.” -Dale Carnegie

3. Understand who people are by how they act

4. People like others who share their same interests

5. Do not hold your listener hostage

6. Remembering the conversation is crucial to growing the relationship

Finally, follow-up by building upon your initial conversation and showing interest

Learn more about the Networking With Purpose event being held on February 10, 2015 at 3:00 p.m. EST. You can discover more and register for the event at this affiliate link:

http://coachingforleaders.com/networkingwithpurpose

To get Mark's book, How to Start a Conversation With Anyone, use this link:

http://coachingforleaders.com/startaconversation
Feedback

Join the conversation: http://coachingforleaders.com/177
Comments, questions, or feedback for future Q&A shows: http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback
Next Q&A show is episode #178 and the topic is accountability

Please join my weekly leadership guide. The leadership guide is delivered to your inbox each Wednesday and includes my thoughts and recommendations on the best articles, podcasts, videos, and books, to support your development between shows. It also includes a brief overview and link to the full weekly show notes. If you, like me, tend to listen to podcasts while you’re on the road or exercising, this will give you an easy way to follow-up later on the links and resources we mention in every show. Thank you to the following people who joined the weekly leadership guide this past week:

Quay Kester, David Deaton, Tracey Chalmers, Vicki Bastian, Russ Vilt, Ricardo Montaño Ozuna, Fiona Adamson, Alessandro Beraldi, Dena Simoneaux, Khalil Khalek, Casey Comstock, Adrienne Wiebusch, Paul Ward, Ulana Dabbs, Michael Chamberlin, Mike Haire, David Walker, and Mark Sieverkropp.

As a bonus, when you join the weekly leadership guide, you’ll get immediate access to my guide on the 10 Leadership Books that Will Help You Get Better Results From Others. Download the 11-page reader's guide and 9-minute video of my top leadership book recommendations…plus, insight on the 2 books that I rely on weekly! Just visit http://coachingforleaders.com/subscribe

Thank you to Kenny Wheeler for the kind reviews on iTunes. If you would like to post review as well, it will be a huge help for all of us to grow the Coaching for Leaders community. If you use iTunes, just visit http://coachingforleaders.com/itunes and if you use Stitcher, please visit http://coachingforleaders.com/stitcher - and thank you in advance for your support!

Jan 26 2015

Play

Rank #13: 376: How to Become the Person You Want to Be, with James Clear

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James Clear: Atomic Habits
James Clear is an author and speaker focused on habits, decision-making, and continuous improvement. He is a regular speaker at Fortune 500 companies and his work is used by teams in the NFL, NBA, and MLB. He’s the author of the new book, Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones*.
Key Points

Goals are great for deciding what direction you want to head, but to actually get there it’s all about your systems.
Results aren’t what needs to change; the processes and habits are what need to change.
Start with the identity you want for yourself and build your habits to reinforce that identity.
Your habits are what prove your identity to yourself.
Habits are like compound interest for self-improvement.

Bonus Audio

How habits reinforce your identity

Resources Mentioned

Atomic Habits* by James Clear
James Clear on Annual Reviews

Related Episodes

Getting Things Done with David Allen (episode 184)
Create Behavior That Lasts With Marshall Goldsmith (episode 196)
The Best Way to Make New Habits Reality (episode 217)

Discover More
Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic.

Oct 15 2018

36mins

Play

Rank #14: 190: How to Improve Your Coaching Skills, with Tom Henschel

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Tom Henschel
Host, The Look & Sound of Leadership podcast and Executive Coach, Essential Communications
When it’s a development issue (or a way of thinking) it’s coaching that’s most helpful.

Tom says that coaching needs good goals, or at least one single goal over time.

Think about the goal as if it were on video — how do you want the end result to look?

“Coaching? It’s not about you.” -Tom Henschel

“The coaching process is helping someone understand, from their own point of view, why it would be in their benefit.” -Tom Henschel

Tom shared two stories from his teenage daughter Julia that helps him with coaching.

Food for thought:

Do people see coaching as part of their jobs? Do they have time for it?

To improve your coaching skills:

Let them go first.
Use open ended questions, such as, “What does that sound like to you?”
Earn the right to give advice.

Tom last appeared on these two episodes:

107: Three Steps To Soliciting Feedback with Tom Henschel
164: How to Handle a Boss Who’s a Jerk with Tom Henschel
Feedback

Comments, questions, or feedback for future Q&A shows: http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback
The next Q&A show is episode 191 on the topic of books

Please join my weekly leadership guide. The leadership guide is delivered to your inbox each Wednesday and includes my thoughts and recommendations on the best articles, podcasts, videos, and books, to support your development between shows. It also includes a brief overview and link to the full weekly show notes. If you, like me, tend to listen to podcasts while you’re on the road or exercising, this will give you an easy way to follow-up later on the links and resources we mention in every show.

As a bonus, when you join the weekly leadership guide, you’ll get immediate access to my reader’s guide listing the 10 Leadership Books that Will Help You Get Better Results From Others with brief summaries from me on the value of each book. Download the 11-page reader's guide and 9-minute video of these book recommendations…plus, insight on the 2 books that I rely on weekly! http://coachingforleaders.com/subscribe
Community Member Spotlight
Want to be featured in an upcoming member spotlight? Visit http://coachingforleaders.com/spotlight

Apr 27 2015

45mins

Play

Rank #15: 386: Unconscious Mistakes Women Make, with Lois Frankel

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Lois Frankel: Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office
Lois Frankel is the President of Corporate Coaching International, a bestselling author, executive coach, and an internationally-recognized expert in the field of leadership development for women. She is the author of the New York Times bestselling books Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office*, Nice Girls Don’t Get Rich*, and Nice Girls Just Don’t Get It*.
Key Points

Women often back off when they see things get competitive.
Don’t confuse other people in the workplace with relationships you’ve had in the past.
When negotiating, women should focus more on the relationship.

Bonus Audio

Behavior has changed, attitudes haven’t
Don’t be the company’s conscience

Resources Mentioned

Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office* by Lois Frankel
Nice Girls Don't Get Rich* by Lois Frankel
The Male Factor: The Unwritten Rules, Misperceptions, and Secret Beliefs of Men in the Workplace* by Shaunti Feldhahn
“Ask Liz” with Liz Weston
Connect with Lois Frankel on LinkedIn

Book Notes
Download my highlights from Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

How to Handle Workplace Bullying, with Jill Morgenthaler (episode 172)
How to Manage Your Inner Critic, with Tara Mohr (episode 232)
How Women Make Stronger, Smarter Choices, with Therese Huston (episode 255)
How to Help the Underdog Thrive, with Terry Lipovski (episode 275)

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Dec 17 2018

38mins

Play

Rank #16: 184: Getting Things Done, with David Allen

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David Allen: Getting Things Done

The Getting Things Done steps:

Capture—collect what has your attention
Clarify—process what it means
Organize—put it where it belongs
Reflect—review frequently
Engage—simply do.

The methodology has not changed in the revision of the book, but what has changed is the number of people who need it.

If what’s most on your mind right now is thinking about what should be on your mind, then it’s time to spend more time clarifying what is most important.

“Not only do you need to spend time thinking, you need to spend time not thinking – absolutely daydreaming.” -David Allen

Your biggest job is to define what your work is.

“The big secret about Getting Things Done is it’s not really about getting things done. It’s about creating appropriate engagement with your life.” -David Allen

“The people most attracted to what we teach, the GTD methodology, are the people who need it least.”

David recommended The War of Art* by Steven Pressfield

One of the best habits you can develop is to do the thing first that you are least looking forward to. Perfectionism is a huge obstacle for procrastination.

David recommended Brain Chains* by Theo Compernolle
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Mar 16 2015

47mins

Play

Rank #17: 344: The Way to Have Conversations That Matter, with Celeste Headlee

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Celeste Headlee: We Need to Talk
Celeste Headlee is an award-winning journalist who has appeared on NPR, PBS World, PRI, CNN, BBC and other international networks. She hosts a daily talk show called “On Second Thought” for Georgia Public Broadcasting in Atlanta. She’s the author of the book We Need to Talk: How to Have Conversations That Matter*.
Key Points

Dysfunctional conversations (especially about politics) are nothing new. What is new is how virtually every decision we make has been politicized.
When in a conversation, let go of the burden of trying to convince someone of something.
Listen to someone to hear their perspective rather than only waiting to hear what they say just so you can refute it.
When you’re trying to take in information, you cannot also be holding an agenda.
If you don’t know an answer, don’t try to hide it. Just say, “I don’t know, but I’ll find out.”
People have less empathy towards others than they used to.
It’s possible to find something in common with almost anyone if you ask a few questions.

Resources Mentioned

We Need to Talk: How to Have Conversations That Matter* by Celeste Headlee
10 Ways to Have a Better Conversation (Celeste’s TED talk)
Don’t Find a Job, Find a Mission
Help Make America Talk Again

Book Notes
Download my highlights from We Need to Talk in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

How to Know What to Ask, with Andrew Warner (episode 198)
Use Power for Good and Not Evil, with Dacher Keltner (episode 254)
How to Increase Your Conversational Intelligence, with with Judith Glaser (episode 271)

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Apr 09 2018

37mins

Play

Rank #18: 466: What High Performers Aren’t Telling You, with Scott Anthony Barlow

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Scott Anthony Barlow: Happen to Your Career
Scott Anthony Barlow is the founder of Happen to Your Career. He’s been featured on CNBC, Yahoo, CareerBuilder, Fast Company, and Huffington Post and various colleges and universities as a top expert on career happiness. He's held executive roles in human resources, business development, and career coaching.

Scott is the host of the Happen to Your Career podcast, featuring the career stories of many successful professionals. He and his team have worked with over 25,000 people to help them stop settling, find their signature strengths, and start doing meaningful work they are enamored with.
Key Points
High performers leave organizations because:

Work is no longer meaningful. They’ve accomplished their goals and now they’re looking for much more meaningful work, projects and challenges.
Flexibility and autonomy are missing. The “when” and “how” people work is becoming incredibly important.
They have outgrown the role. They perceive that just because they’ve outgrown the role that there is no where else to go in the organization.

What leaders can do:

Help candidates find what’s meaningful for them.
Create opportunities to work when and how they want.
Help people create their own role.

Resources Mentioned

Finding the Career That Fits You (Scott’s FREE 8-Day Video Course)
The Ultimate Guide to Using Your Strengths to Get Hired

Related Episodes

How to Figure Out Your Career, with Scott Anthony Barlow (episode 259)
Three Steps to Great Career Conversations, with Russ Laraway (episode 370)
Effective Delegation of Authority, with Hassan Osman (episode 413)

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Apr 27 2020

35mins

Play

Rank #19: 146: Three Things To Stop Doing In Leadership

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Perspective from Steve Richardson, author of Become a Better Leader in 30 Days*, on what to stop doing in leadership.
Guest: Steve Richardson
Author, Become A Better Leader in 30 Days*

“All leaders manage, but not all managers lead.” -Steve Richardson

Three things not to do when managing people

Avoid managing by suggestion

Managers do this when they don’t want to be accountable
What do people really want from leaders?

Direct
Decisive
Avoid managing by hoping

These managers maintain a positive attitude, but don’t really know how things are going
Employees learn that managers like this want to hear only good news
Avoid managing by redoing

Some managers take on the work of employees and will re-do it
This is trap for people who were the start performers in the previous role
We mentioned episode #117: The Seven Steps You Follow To Delegate Work
“Doing something well myself is different than doing something well through other people.” -Steve Richardson

Ask: How can I help you?

The response “fine” does not necessarily mean fine
Ask the next question to find out what’s really going on

Steve's triangle of managing people: Fair, Friendly, and Firm

One of these will typically take the lead in one situation
What does this person most need right now?
It takes tension to keep them in balance
Let intuition govern what takes the lead in any given situation

What should you stop doing?

Feedback

On this topic: http://coachingforleaders.com/146
Comments, questions, or feedback: http://coachingforleaders.com/feedback
(949) 38-LEARN

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Thank you to weekly update subscribers Tracey Tillott-Gray, Sal Vilardo, Christine Quackenboss, Olga Correia, Tammy Ostroski, Jeff Putsch, Sharen Kreitsch, Whitney Jacobs, Christopher Naidoo, Jo Goeppner, Yosbel Lecha, and Kelvina Burrell. You can subscribe as well at http://coachingforleaders.com/subscribe

Jun 23 2014

Play

Rank #20: 316: Executive Presence with Your Elevator Speech, with Tom Henschel

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Tom Henschel: The Look & Sound of Leadership
Tom Henschel of Essential Communications grooms senior leaders and executive teams. An internationally recognized expert in the field of workplace communications and self-presentation, he has helped thousands of leaders achieve excellence through his work as an executive coach and his top-rated podcast, The Look & Sound of Leadership.
Key Points

An elevator speech is a crisp, concise, high-level summary of a complex, multi-layered topic.
It can be about whatever you do as a profession, but it can also be about anything else, like your recent vacation.
Elevator speeches get crafted … it doesn’t happen in the spur of the moment.
Creating an elevator speech doesn’t take long, but you have to choose to reflect.
An elevator speech is actually a conversation tailored to the other person.
Say a little bit, and then test the other person’s level of interest.
The longer you talk, the less effective you are.

The Three Qualities of a Great Elevator Speech

Keep it short
Be memorable
Tailor it to the listener

Resources Mentioned

Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office* by Lois P. Frankel

Related Episodes

Enhance Your Executive Presence, with Tom Henschel (episode 272)
How to Grow Your Professional Network, with Tom Henschel (episode 279)
Tom Henschel Interviews Dave (episode 300)

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Sep 25 2017

39mins

Play

483: How to Start in Leadership, with Bonni Stachowiak

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Bonni Stachowiak: Teaching in Higher Ed

Bonni Stachowiak is the host of the Teaching in Higher Ed podcast, a professor of business and management at Vanguard University, and my life partner. Prior to her academic career, Bonni was a human resources consultant and executive officer for a publicly traded company. She is the author of The Productive Online and Offline Professor: A Practical Guide*.

Listener Questions

  • Kierstin asked for suggestions (books, individuals) for starting her leadership journey — and also how to navigate leading people who are older than her.
  • Bridgette wondered if we had suggestions on funding priorities, vision, and bringing others into leadership roles.
  • Michael asked our advice on handling confrontations between departments.

Resources Mentioned

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Aug 03 2020

29mins

Play

482: How to Sell Your Vision, with Michael Hyatt

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Michael Hyatt: The Vision-Driven Leader

Michael is the Chief Executive Officer and founder of Michael Hyatt & Company. He has scaled multiple companies over the years, including a $250M publishing company with 700+ employees and his own leadership development company that has grown over 60% year over year for the past 4 years. Under his leadership, Michael Hyatt & Company has been featured in the Inc. 5000 list of the fastest-growing companies in America for three years in a row.

He is also the author of several New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and USA Today bestselling books, including Platform*, Living Forward*, Your Best Year Ever*, and Free to Focus*. He enjoys The Double Win with his wife of 40+ years, five daughters, and nine grandchildren. He recently released his newest book: The Vision-Driven Leader: 10 Questions to Focus Your Efforts, Energize Your Team, and Scale Your Business*.

In this conversation, Michael and I discuss where to start once you’ve created an initial vision. Michael invites us to engage those that don’t like change and take the time to listen. In addition, getting buy-in from your boss is essential — your vision should align with their goals and those of the organization.

Key Points

  • Start with your direct reports who don’t like change. Be quick to listen, slow to speak.
  • Make the distinction between risky vs. stupid.
  • Bosses don’t like surprises. You have to commit first.

When I had a boss, I had a basic rule: Don’t take a swing unless I’m confident I’ll hit the ball. -Michael Hyatt

  • Know your customer. Make sure the vision is helping your boss — and the organization — achieve their goals.

Before you schedule a time to pitch your proposal, answer the question: how is my Vision Script going to help my boss achieve their goals? If you can’t answer that question, you’re not ready to make the pitch. -Michael Hyatt

  • Anticipate the objections you’re likely to receive and be ready for them.
  • Once you’ve got buy-in on a vision, stop. Don’t oversell it.
  • When you’re starting to get tired of hearing yourself talk about the vision, that’s an indicator that you’re on the right track.

Resources Mentioned

Book Notes

Download my highlights from The Vision-Driven Leader in PDF format (free membership required).

Related Episodes

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Jul 27 2020

32mins

Play

481: How Great Teams Find Purpose, with David Burkus

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David Burkus: Pick a Fight

David’s work is changing how companies approach innovation, collaboration, and leadership. He is the award-winning author of four books and offers a fresh perspective on how to improve our organizations and build better teams by blending the most current research in psychology, sociology, economics, and network science.

His books have been translated in more than a dozen languages and his work has appeared in the Wall Street Journal, Harvard Business Review, USAToday, Fast Company, and more. He has consistently been named one of the world’s top business thought leaders by Thinkers50 and his TED Talk has been viewed over 2 million times. He is the author of the audiobook, Pick a Fight: How Great Teams Find a Purpose Worth Rallying Around*.

In this conversation, David and I discuss why picking a fight is a powerful motivation, but important to do with wisdom. Most organizations won’t benefit from starting fights with rivals. Instead, discover one of three fights that will support a cause worth fighting for.

Key Points

  • Avoid fights with rivals.

Picking a fight is a powerful motivator; but leaders need to pick their fight wisely. Instead of someone to fight, they need to find a cause worth fighting for.

Three kinds of fights that are useful for leaders to engage in:

  • The Revolutionary Fight
  • The Underdog Fight
  • The Ally Fight

Resources Mentioned

Book Notes

Download my highlights from Pick a Fight in PDF format (free membership required).

Related Episodes

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Jul 20 2020

39mins

Play

480: Get Noticed Without Selling Out, with Laura Huang

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Laura Huang: Edge

Laura Huang is an associate professor at the Harvard Business School. Her research examines interpersonal relationships and implicit bias in entrepreneurship and in the workplace. She is the creator of #FindYourEdge, an initiative dedicated to addressing inequality and disadvantage through personal empowerment.

Her award-winning research has been featured in the Financial Times, The Wall Street Journal, USA Today, and Forbes — and she was named one of the 40 Best Business School Professors Under the Age of 40 by Poets & Quants. She’s the author of the book Edge: Turning Adversity into Advantage*.

In this conversation, Laura and I discuss the value of constraints, why hard work isn’t enough, and the reason you’re not selling out when reclaiming an awareness of yourself. We also explore why it’s essential for you to be able to tell your story.

Key Points

  • “Be yourself” is sometimes bad advice.
  • You’re not selling out when you reclaim an awareness of yourself.
  • Bring value — and also be sure that people KNOW you bring value.
  • Self awareness can sometimes encumber our ability to guide.
  • Don’t passively let others write your narrative — write your own narrative and guide other’s view of you. Let your past make you better, not bitter.

Resources Mentioned

Book Notes

Download my highlights from Edge in PDF format (free membership required).

Related Episodes

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Jul 13 2020

39mins

Play

479: Leadership Lies We Tell Ourselves, with Emily Leathers

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Emily Leathers: Emotional Leadership

Emily is an executive coach and software engineering manager. She has led teams and advised other managers for years. She’s seen the difference a truly passionate leader and manager can make for their team and the world around them.

Like a lot of managers and coaches, she’s had a front row seat to the patterns that cause a lot of leaders to overwork and over stress. She is the author of the guide The 7 Leadership Lies and she’s the host of the Emotional Leadership podcast. She’s also a member of the Coaching for Leaders Academy.

In this conversation, we discuss some of the common lies that leaders tend to tell themselves that lead to frustration and impostor syndrome. Then, we explore better ways to frame these beliefs, to lead with more confidence and effectiveness.

Key Points

Lie #1: I’m supposed to do everything I, my manager, or my team can think of.

Truth: A leader’s job is about prioritization – and that means prioritizing how we spend our own time as well.

Lie #2: There’s a timeline.

Truth: There is no rush. Work gets much easier when we turn off the unneeded sense of emergency. Prioritization is the aim.

Lie #3: Emotions don’t belong at work.

Truth: Every action we take is driven by an emotion. You are going to experience emotions at work – that or you’ll be staring at a wall all day without a single thought in your mind. Turning them off isn’t an option. Learning to allow your emotions and use them to your advantage is critical for your success as a leader.

Lie #4: I’m supposed to have an answer for any problem or question a team member asks.

Truth: A manager’s role is to help your team solve problems, not to solve problems for your team.

Resources Mentioned

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Jul 11 2020

39mins

Play

478: How to Explore Personality, with Bonni Stachowiak

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Bonni Stachowiak: Teaching in Higher Ed

Bonni Stachowiak is the host of the Teaching in Higher Ed podcast, a professor of business and management at Vanguard University, and my life partner. Prior to her academic career, Bonni was a human resources consultant and executive officer for a publicly traded company. She is the author of The Productive Online and Offline Professor: A Practical Guide*.

Listener Questions

  • Joseph asked our opinion about this HBR IdeaCast on StrengthsFinder: Stop Focusing on Your Strengths
  • Matt asked about using personality assessments when coaching an athletic team.
  • Mike wondered the best way to approach conducting internal podcast interviews of employees.

Resources Mentioned

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Jul 06 2020

38mins

Play

477: Transform Panic Into Purpose, with Pat Flynn

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Pat Flynn: Let Go

Pat Flynn is a father, husband, and entrepreneur who lives and works in San Diego, California. He owns several successful online businesses and is a professional blogger, keynote speaker, and Wall Street Journal bestselling author. He’s the host of the Smart Passive Income and AskPat podcasts, which have earned a combined total of over 60 million downloads, multiple awards, and features in publications such as The New York Times and Forbes.

Pat is the author of the book Let Go: How to Transform Moments of Panic into a Life of Profits and Purpose. You can find him at Smart Passive Income.

In this conversation, Pat and I discuss the events leading up to his layoff in 2008, how he processed the change at the time, and what he did to respond purposely. Plus, he has reminders for leaders considering layoffs and many resources for those who’ve gone through it themselves.

Key Points

  • Plans are good and necessary to have, but they shouldn’t be written in stone.
  • When the unexpected happens, keep moving.
  • If you find yourself leading an organization and the future is uncertain, don’t say or pretend otherwise.
  • A core value of Pat’s organization: embrace the process.

Resources Mentioned

Book Notes

Download my highlights from Let Go in PDF format (free membership required).

Related Episodes

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Jun 29 2020

39mins

Play

476: How to Pivot Quickly, with Steve Blank

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Steve Blank: The Startup Owner’s Manual

Steve Blank is a Silicon Valley serial-entrepreneur and academician. He is recognized for developing the Customer Development methodology, which launched the Lean Startup movement. Steve is also the co-founder of E.piphany.

His Google Tech talk, The Secret History of Silicon Valley, offers a widely regarded insider’s perspective on the emerging Silicon Valley’s start-up innovation. He’s also published three books: The Four Steps to the Epiphany*, Not All Those Who Wander Are Lost, and The Startup Owner’s Manual*.

In this conversation, Steve and I discuss the steps that leaders should take when making pivots. We explored the importance of creating a Minimal Viable Product or Minimum Viable Service, followed quickly with customer discovery, rapid testing, and refinement.

Key Points

What doesn’t kill me makes me stronger. -Friedrich Nietzsche

To pivot quickly:

  • Create a MVP (Minimal Viable Product) or MVS (Minimum Viable Service).
  • Conduct customer discovery: validate your idea by speaking with existing/potential customers about the new product/service.
  • Do rapid testing: get your work into the hands of existing/potential customers quickly. Don’t try to get it perfect right out of the gate.
  • Refine your offering: use fast feedback to make the product/service better.

Resources Mentioned

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Jun 22 2020

34mins

Play

475: What to Hold People Accountable For, with Stacey Barr

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Stacey Barr: Practical Performance Measurement

Stacey Barr is a specialist in strategic performance measurement and evidence-based leadership. She is the creator of PuMP®, a performance measurement methodology that routinely transforms measurement cynics into its greatest advocates.

Stacey is also the author of two books, Practical Performance Measurement: Using the PuMP® Blueprint for Fast, Easy, and Engaging KPIs, and Prove It!: How to Create a High Performance Culture and Measurable Success.

In the conversation, Stacey and I explore the struggles of holding people accountable for quantitative results, including behaviors that often lead to unintended consequences. Instead, she invites leaders to hold people accountable for monitoring, interpretation, and action.

Key Points

Holding people accountable for quantitative results tends to lead employees to:

  • Choosing measures of what they are already good at
  • Choosing easy targets
  • Manipulating the numbers to make the measures look good
  • Having lots of excuses for why targets are missed

Our typical definition of accountability drives the wrong behavior.

Instead, hold people accountable for:

  1. Monitoring the important results: when someone is responsible for a specific business result, like problem resolution or accuracy of advice or eliminating rework, they can be accountable for routinely monitoring that result with a performance measure.
  2. Interpreting their measures: when someone is responsible for monitoring a performance measure, they can be accountable for interpreting what that measure is telling them about the business result it measures.
  3. Initiating action when action is required: when someone is responsible for interpreting a performance measure, they can be accountable for deciding what kind of action is needed, if at all.

Resources Mentioned

Book Notes

Download my highlights from Practical Performance Measurement in PDF format (free membership required).

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Jun 15 2020

36mins

Play

474: Lead Best by Being You, with Elena Kornoff

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Elena Kornoff: Surf City Still Works

Elena Kornoff is a founder partner of Surf City Still Works, an independent craft distillery dedicated to supporting talented artists and sharing the spirit of California. She’s been a listener of the show the past few years and now a member of the Coaching for Leaders Academy.

In this conversation, Elena and I discuss the massive disruption that COVID-19 made to their business and how her team responded with flexibility in a time of change. We also explore how to be a leader and still be yourself, despite our common perception of leadership. Plus, the invitation from Elena to ask for help when you need it.

Key Points

  • Surf City Still Works is an independent craft distillery founded in 2017 to support talented artists and share the spirit of California.
  • Past failures are an important teacher in how to pivot quickly.
  • Successful leaders may show up as inspiring and charismatic — and they also are supportive and quiet. Research shows that both styles can lead well.
  • When you need help, ask for it. There are people in your network you are able and willing, but they need to know.

Resources Mentioned

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Jun 13 2020

29mins

Play

473: Embrace a Just Cause, with Simon Sinek

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Simon Sinek: The Infinite Game
Simon Sinek is an unshakable optimist. He is best known for popularizing the concept of WHY, which he described in his first TED Talk in 2009. That talk went on to become the second most watched TED Talk of all time, today surpassing 50 million views.

His interview on millennials in the workplace propelled his name to be the fifth most searched term on YouTube in 2017. Simon is the author of five bestselling books, including Start With Why*, Leaders Eat Last*, and his newest book, The Infinite Game*.

In this conversation, Simon and I discuss why he doesn’t believe these are unprecedented times, the difference between a finite and infinite game, and the distinction between a why and a just cause. We also detail how to uncover a just cause and five standards that an effective just cause must meet.
Key Points
Our products and services are some of the things we use to advance our cause. They are not themselves the cause. -Simon Sinek
A just cause embraces five standards:

For something: affirmative and optimistic.
Inclusive: open to all those who would like to contribute
Service-oriented: for the primary benefit of others
Resilient: able to endure political, technological and cultural change
Idealistic: big, bold and ultimately unachievable

In the infinite game, the only real competitor is yourself. -Simon Sinek
Resources Mentioned

The Infinite Game* by Simon Sinek
Live Online Classes by Simon Sinek

Book Notes
Download my highlights from The Infinite Game in PDF format (free membership required).
Related Episodes

Start With Why, with Simon Sinek (episode 223)
How to Create a Vivid Vision, with Cameron Herold (episode 345)
Tie Leadership Development to Business Results, with Mark Allen (episode 435)
Leadership Through Massive Change, with Elizabeth Lilla (episode 463)

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Jun 08 2020

33mins

Play

472: How to Run an Online Meeting, with Bonni Stachowiak

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Bonni Stachowiak: Teaching in Higher Ed
Bonni Stachowiak is the host of the Teaching in Higher Ed podcast, a professor of business and management at Vanguard University, and my life partner. Prior to her academic career, Bonni was a human resources consultant and executive officer for a publicly traded company. She is the author of The Productive Online and Offline Professor: A Practical Guide*.
Key Points

Be apparent about the purpose of your meeting: connect, align, decide, ideate/brainstorm, plan, or produce. Discover more from Mamie Kanfer Stewart.
You need to be more apparent and intentional about timing, transitions, and facilitation in an online meeting than with an in-person one.
Use a service like BombBomb* for video messages that don’t require live interaction.
Unless background noise or size of the meeting prevents it, invite people to “unmute” so you can have richer dialogue without interruption.
Alert people if they have audio issues. Get headsets for your team, if possible. We use and recommend the Jabra Evolve line* of USB headsets.
Number one rule for lighting: position light in front of you and not behind you. If the front light can be natural (i.e. facing a window) even better.

Resources Mentioned

BombBomb* (free 14-day trial)
How to Combat Zoom Fatigue by Liz Fosslien and Mollie West Duffy
COVID-19 and Videoclassism by Taharee Jackson

Related Episodes

How to Lead Meetings That Get Results, with Mamie Kanfer Stewart (episode 358)
Seven Tools to Create Margin and a New Podcast (episode 411)
The Power of Why Over How, with Gina Bianchini (episode 460)
Connecting Over Video (The Look & Sound of Leadership)

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Jun 01 2020

39mins

Play

471: How to Say No Without Saying No, with Lois Frankel

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Lois Frankel: Nice Girls Don’t Speak Up or Stand Out
Lois Frankel is the President of Corporate Coaching International, and is a bestselling author, executive coach, and an internationally-recognized expert in the field of leadership development for women. She has appeared on Larry King Live, The Tavis Smiley Show, The Today Show, and many other places to discuss her New York Times bestselling books, Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office*, Nice Girls Don’t Get Rich*, and Nice Girls Just Don’t Get It*.

She has served diverse clients such as The Walt Disney Company, Amgen, The World Bank, McKinsey & Company, Inc., Northrop Grumman, and many others. Her newest audiobook just released is titled Nice Girls Don’t Speak Up or Stand Out: How to Make Your Voice Heard, Your Point Known, and Your Presence Felt*.

In this conversation, Lois and I discuss why saying no is so important, key tactics in doing it with professionalism and grace, and some useful language we can leverage. We also explore why we end up saying yes to work that others don’t really care that much about and how we can be our own worst enemy on saying yes.
Key Points
In response to an invitation:
As much as I would love to attend, my calendar is already over-scheduled for that week.
In response to a statement that may have some truth to it but that won’t change your position:
Be that as it may, it doesn’t change the fact that I’m not able to provide you with a loan at this time.
In response to someone asking you to do something that actually benefits them more than you:
Thank you for thinking of me. Unfortunately, I am not able to take advantage of your kind offer.
In response to someone you care about and to whom who you genuinely wish you could say yes:
If I could I would. I really value our relationships and wish the situation was different.
In response to someone asking for yet another favor:
Although I’ve been able to help you out in the past, this time I just don’t have the bandwidth.
In response to a somewhat unreasonable request:
I’m sure you understand that I receive many similar requests and that I’m just not able to be of help at this time.
In response to someone who uses flattery to get you to accept their request:
I’m flattered and at the same time I’m not able to accept your gracious offer.
When you are genuinely sorry that you must decline:
I’m so sorry that this isn’t going to work out. I hope it might in the future.
Resources Mentioned

Nice Girls Don't Speak Up or Stand Out: How to Make Your Voice Heard, Your Point Known, and Your Presence Felt* by Lois Frankel

Related Episodes

Unconscious Mistakes Women Make, with Lois Frankel (episode 386)
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May 25 2020

39mins

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470: How to Build an Invincible Company, with Alex Osterwalder

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Alex Osterwalder: The Invincible Company
Alex is obsessed with making strategy, innovation, and entrepreneurship simple, practical, and applicable. He invented the Business Model Canvas, co-founded Strategyzer.com, and lead authored Business Model Generation which sold a million copies in 30 languages. He’s one of the top-ranked management thinkers in the world by Thinkers50.

He is the author of the book, The Invincible Company: How to Constantly Reinvent Your Organization with Inspiration From the World's Best Business Models*.

In this conversation, Alex and I explore the distinction between exploration and exploitation that invincible organizations must hold in tandem. Alex teaches us the five most common myths of the innovation journey and what leaders can do to compete and stay relevant in a changing world.
Key Points
Myths of the innovation journey:

Myth 1: The most important part of the innovation and entrepreneurship journey is to find and execute the perfect idea.
Myth 2: The evidence will show you a clear path forward why you systematically test ideas. The solution will magically emerge if you just test and adapt your idea often enough.
Myth 3: A small number of big bets will lead to a large return.
Myth 4: The skills required to explore a new business and to manager and existing one are pretty similar. Business is business.
Myth 5: Innovation teams are renegades or pirates that are out to disrupt the old business. They need to operate in stealth mode to survive inside a company.

Invincible Companies constantly reinvent who they are and where and how they compete in order to stay relevant and ahead.
Resources Mentioned

The Invincible Company: How to Constantly Reinvent Your Organization with Inspiration From the World's Best Business Models* by Alex Osterwalder
Innovation Project Scorecard: Evidence Trumps Opinion

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How to Transform Your Limitations Into Advantages, with Mark Barden (episode 207)
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May 18 2020

39mins

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469: See What Really Matters, with Greg McKeown

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Greg McKeown: Essentialism
Greg McKeown is the author of the New York Times and Wall Street Journal bestseller, Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less*. His book is frequently listed as #1 Time Management book on Amazon and challenges the core assumptions about achievement to get to the essence of what really drives success.

His writing has appeared in or been covered by The New York Times, Fast Company, Fortune, HuffPost, and many others. He is among the most popular bloggers for the Harvard Business Review and LinkedIn’s Influencers group: averaging a million views a month.

In this conversation, Greg and I discuss why success can be such a poor teacher and how to avoid what Jim Collins calls, “The undisciplined pursuit of more.” We explore how the principles of journalism can help us arrive at what’s essential and why journaling may be the place to start.
Key Points
Being a journalist of your own life will force you to stop hyper-focusing on all the minor details and see the bigger picture.

Success is a poor teacher and may lead to the undisciplined pursuit of more.
Essentialists listen for what is not being explicitly stated. They read between the lines.
Nonessentialists hear what is loud. Essentialists listen for the signal in the noise.
Journaling is a useful practice to begin reviewing what is coming up in your life and discovering the leads you may be missing.
Make time every 90 days to review and determine what’s next.

Resources Mentioned

Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less* by Greg McKeown
Essentialism podcast
Simple Productivity: How to Accomplish More With Less with Greg McKeown

Book Notes
Download my highlights from Essentialism in PDF format (free membership required).
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May 11 2020

35mins

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468: When to Show Emotion, with Bonni Stachowiak

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Bonni Stachowiak: Teaching in Higher Ed
Bonni Stachowiak is the host of the Teaching in Higher Ed podcast, a professor of business and management at Vanguard University, and my life partner. Prior to her academic career, Bonni was a human resources consultant and executive officer for a publicly traded company. She is the author of The Productive Online and Offline Professor: A Practical Guide.
Listener Questions

Matt wondered when it’s appropriate to show emotion during a difficult time.
Selah asked our advice about communication strategies through COVID-19.
Amber wanted to know what she could do to support a manager who is causing stress for others during the pandemic.

Resources Mentioned

Netflix Special: The Call to Courage with Brené Brown
Hope for the Flowers* by Trina Paulus

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Start With Why, with Simon Sinek (episode 223)
What to Do With Your Feelings, with Lori Gottlieb (episode 438)
How to Balance Care and Accountability When Leading Virtually, with Jonathan Raymond (episode 464)
How to Lead a Virtual Team, with Susan Gerke (episode 465)

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May 04 2020

30mins

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467: The Fiscal Realities of Crisis, with Andrew Carroll

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Andrew Carroll: CFOAndrew
Andrew is a CPA and consultant at CFOAndrew who advises leaders and businesses on financial questions and change. He supports organizations in navigating taxes, investments, insurance, business strategy, operations, mergers and acquisitions, and accounting.
Key Points

Know the difference between deferred demand and lost demand and consider that in your strategy going forward.
Leverage is meant to protect a business, not save it.
Hedging is the most important thing you can do with your money.
Business owners and leaders should consider unemployment programs and, in The United States, Emergency Sick Pay, Economic Injury Disaster Loan Emergency Advance, and the Paycheck Protection Program.

Use the formula P=40 to 70, in which P stands for the probability of success and the numbers indicate the percentage of information acquired. Once the information is in the 40 to 70 range, go with your gut. -Colin Powell
Resources Mentioned

CFOAndrew

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Four Rules to Get Control of Your Money, with Jesse Mecham (episode 356)
Dumb Things Smart People Do With Money, with Jill Schlesinger (episode 396)

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May 02 2020

34mins

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466: What High Performers Aren’t Telling You, with Scott Anthony Barlow

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Scott Anthony Barlow: Happen to Your Career
Scott Anthony Barlow is the founder of Happen to Your Career. He’s been featured on CNBC, Yahoo, CareerBuilder, Fast Company, and Huffington Post and various colleges and universities as a top expert on career happiness. He's held executive roles in human resources, business development, and career coaching.

Scott is the host of the Happen to Your Career podcast, featuring the career stories of many successful professionals. He and his team have worked with over 25,000 people to help them stop settling, find their signature strengths, and start doing meaningful work they are enamored with.
Key Points
High performers leave organizations because:

Work is no longer meaningful. They’ve accomplished their goals and now they’re looking for much more meaningful work, projects and challenges.
Flexibility and autonomy are missing. The “when” and “how” people work is becoming incredibly important.
They have outgrown the role. They perceive that just because they’ve outgrown the role that there is no where else to go in the organization.

What leaders can do:

Help candidates find what’s meaningful for them.
Create opportunities to work when and how they want.
Help people create their own role.

Resources Mentioned

Finding the Career That Fits You (Scott’s FREE 8-Day Video Course)
The Ultimate Guide to Using Your Strengths to Get Hired

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Apr 27 2020

35mins

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465: How to Lead a Virtual Team, with Susan Gerke

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Susan Gerke: GO Team
Susan Gerke has been the president of Gerke Consulting & Development. She has worked with global teams and has certified facilitators around the world to deliver management, leadership, and team offerings. Susan is co-creator of GO Team, a training suite for organizations to power team performance.
Key Points

Out of sight sometimes means out of mind. Perception of communication will be less than you think.
Interactions over the phone/video feel more formal than they do in person, at least at the start.
You don’t find out about things virtually as quickly as you do face to face.
Figure out how to make space for different kinds of styles and personalities. A virtual environment tends to amplify these differences.
Remember to have expectation setting conversations with family members.
Some people will call you every day and some people won’t ever reach out proactively. That’s normal — find a pattern that works for each relationship.

Resources Mentioned

GO Team
Survey results: community input on leading/working virtually

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The Four Unique Types of Teams, with Susan Gerke (episode 138)
How to Create Team Guidelines, with Susan Gerke (episode 192)
How to Balance Care and Accountability When Leading Virtually, with Jonathan Raymond (episode 464)

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Apr 20 2020

38mins

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464: How to Balance Care and Accountability When Leading Virtually, with Jonathan Raymond

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Jonathan Raymond: Good Authority
Jonathan Raymond is the founder of Refound, where he and his team work with organizations to create a company culture based in personal growth. He’s the author of the book Good Authority: How to Become the Leader Your Team Is Waiting For*.

Jonathan’s team recently released The Accountability Dial 101* course to help leaders have great feedback conversations with their teams. If you are working to get better at accountability, it’s the most useful framework I know of to balance care for people and accountability for results.

In this conversation, Jonathan and I discuss the Accountability Dial, how it’s most useful when leading virtually, and the importance of taking the first step.
Key Points
You don’t get to look good and grow at the same time.

Assume positive intent, regardless of where you are on the accountability dial.

The Accountability Dial:

The Mention: In real-time (if possible), pull them aside to offer an observation about an undesired behavior.
The Invitation: Provide 2-3 examples of how that behavior is a pattern or theme they can work on.
The Conversation: Use your weekly one-on-ones to dive into how the pattern is holding them back.
The Boundary: Collaborate together to decide next steps and set a timeline for making a change.
The Limit: Before giving up, have one more heart-to-heart to give them a final chance for meaningful change.

Resources Mentioned

The Accountability Dial 101 course*
Good Authority: How to Become the Leader Your Team Is Waiting For* by Jonathan Raymond
Refound (Jonathan’s firm)

Book Notes
Download my highlights from Good Authority in PDF format (free membership required).
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The Way to Be More Self-Aware, with Tasha Eurich (episode 442)

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Apr 13 2020

38mins

Play

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Great!

By tommye w-c - Mar 17 2020
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Incredible coaching and advice for leaders!

Useful podcast

By Angscreed - Mar 09 2020
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It provides a secure and digestible way to coach self and others.