Cover image of You Can't Do That

You Can't Do That

A podcast about hockey from three women who have more opinions than information and LOTS of feelings about the Washington Capitals. These enthusiastically self-righteous idiots aren't here to win - they're here to make friends! (And talk about which hockey players are cats and which are dogs.) Join Eva, Kelly, and Rave every Wednesday for jokes and yelling about the latest league headlines, player antics, and more.

Weekly hand curated podcast episodes for learning

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The best episodes ranked using user listens.

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#04: Golf. Space. My Dog.

Starting around the hour mark, there's a weird echo that we've so far been unable to fix. We're sorry about that! We appreciate your patience and hope it doesn't affect your enjoyment of the episode.

1hr 20mins

4 Apr 2018

Rank #1

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#77: Disasterpod!

TIMECODES:06:00 Pandemic?! 12:15 Which Direction? 56:45 Draft Class Quarantine FMKSupport us on Patreon!https://www.patreon.com/youcantdothatBuy some fun merch!https://shop.spreadshirt.com/you-cant-do-that/

1hr 17mins

14 Mar 2020

Rank #2

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#59: The Snickscourse

TIMECODES:01:48 - #ALLCAPS16:32 - Look At This Photograph. Look At It.28:08 - Elsewhere in the NHL45:50 - Rave’s dreamboat56:09 - Hat Trick or Treat1:18:10 - Listener questionsSupport YCDT on Patreon!https://www.patreon.com/youcantdothat

1hr 33mins

30 Oct 2019

Rank #3

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#14: Weekend At Backy's

The Drunkington Sloppitals won the Stanley Cup and first of all, you're welcome. Rave, Catie, Kelly, and Eva celebrate the win and the celebration itself in the Season 1 finale of YCDT.

1hr 25mins

15 Jun 2018

Rank #4

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#03: No Ethical Consumption Under Late-Stage NHL

As we all know, hockey is made up of a select few cats and extremely a lot of dogs. But which of them are worthy of this season's Hart Trophy? And which are Dreamboats, but like, the dumpster kind? Let's find out together!

1hr 16mins

22 Mar 2018

Rank #5

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#16: The Ballad of Nicke & Ovi

In the second YCDT Summer Special, your hosts follow through on their threat to talk about [redacted] and [redacted]. It's...[redacted].

1hr 30mins

24 Aug 2018

Rank #6

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#63: Shenanigannery

TIMECODES:02:03 - Spitgate!!!22:09 - Caps @ NYR (feat. Danielle & Laura!)36:22 - Bye bye Badcop 43:20 - Yee-haw in Dallas47:35 - Rave's dreamboat Support YCDT on Patreon!https://www.patreon.com/youcantdothat


27 Nov 2019

Rank #7

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#15: A Goat Named War Games (feat. Jason Rogers)

In our first Summer Special, we welcome to the pod Actual NHL Reporter Jason Rogers for talk of career paths, big chains, and - sorry sorry soRRY - animal semen. Sorry!!

1hr 2mins

27 Jul 2018

Rank #8

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#68: Very Informed Punditry

TIMECODES:02:23 #ALLCAPS20:45 Winter Classic 35:15 Canucks’ ‘90s night 37:00 Kelly's dreamboat 47:05 VIP: Very Informed Punditry 1:02:28 Listener Qs: hockeys as tarot cards; hockeys as competitive dogs Support us on Patreon!https://www.patreon.com/youcantdothatBuy some fun merch!https://shop.spreadshirt.com/you-cant-do-that/

1hr 15mins

8 Jan 2020

Rank #9

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#07: Chess on a Hockey Plane

Professor Kelly's class is in session! Today's topics: Totalitarian regimes, hints of the supernatural, and Rave's dispatches from inside the bowels of Caps/Pens Game 2.

1hr 12mins

2 May 2018

Rank #10

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#13: Hashtag Feminine Features

We're on the cusp of [superstitious mumbling], so let's distract ourselves! Topics for discussion: confusing feelings, good hair, "The Bachelorette"-style pick-'ems, a ROBBERY??, and - at long last - One Direction.

1hr 31mins

7 Jun 2018

Rank #11

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Bonus: A Bull Named Captain Obvious (feat. Jason Rogers)

Want more weird/good bonus content like this? Support us on Patreon!https://www.patreon.com/youcantdothat


19 Jul 2019

Rank #12

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#08: Playing For Love (And Spite)

Step into the YCDT time machine for a look back at life before the Washington Capitals officially advanced to the 2018 Stanley Cup conference finals.

1hr 27mins

9 May 2018

Rank #13

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#60: John Carlson Cannot Twerk.

TIMECODES:02:25 - #ALLCAPS24:35 - NHL chitchat30:00 - Our dreamboat40:35 - I Came Here To Make Friends59:00 - Listener questionsSupport YCDT on Patreon!https://www.patreon.com/youcantdothat

1hr 7mins

6 Nov 2019

Rank #14

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Bonus: Hockey Chirps Hall of Fame

Catie hosts a tour through some of the most patently ridiculous hockey player "insults" in memory.


13 Apr 2018

Rank #15

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#61: Hot Dumb Hockey University

TIMECODES:03:20 - AHH! Real Caps Players11:34 - Between 2 Blue Lines recap17:30 - #ALLCAPS26:15 - NHL chitchat33:00 - Catie's dreamboat44:45 - DormboatsSupport YCDT on Patreon!https://www.patreon.com/youcantdothat

1hr 11mins

13 Nov 2019

Rank #16

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#62: Ev-kevin/Kev-geny

TIMECODES:02:25 - #ALLCAPS13:45 - BYE DON CHERRY LMAO 19:10 - NHL chitchat26:39 - Catie got a hatty!!!34:34 - Eva's dreamboat 43:00 - Whomst Saved Whomst 55:05 - Listener questionSupport YCDT on Patreon!https://www.patreon.com/youcantdothat

1hr 4mins

20 Nov 2019

Rank #17

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Bonus: Pitch Hockey 2 Me

Rave has piles of money. Catie, Kelly, and Eva have a fun and/or miserable proposal for what to do with it.


2 Mar 2018

Rank #18

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#10: Thanks, Zodiac Hockey Dot Com

With Catie away, the remaining mystical coven members seek pre-Game 6 guidance and reassurance from - where else? - the tarot deck. Plus: Some compliments for Tampa Bay.

1hr 27mins

23 May 2018

Rank #19

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#46: Powerwashed

TIMECODES:2:40 - Women's hockey6:29 - IIHF Worlds/Off-season lifestyles12:10 - Canes/Isles19:20 - Bruins/Blue Jackets24:00 - Sharks/Avs30:13 - Stars/Blues37:15 - Eva's dreamboat51:10 - Unnatural Hat Tricks1:08:00 - Listener questionsSUPPORT US ON PATREON! https://www.patreon.com/youcantdothat

1hr 21mins

8 May 2019

Rank #20