Cover image of Wolf 359
(2757)

Rank #4 in Science Fiction category

Fiction
Comedy Fiction
Science Fiction

Wolf 359

Updated 4 days ago

Rank #4 in Science Fiction category

Fiction
Comedy Fiction
Science Fiction
Read more

Life's not easy for Doug Eiffel, the communications officer for the U.S.S. Hephaestus Research Station, currently on Day 448 of its orbit around red dwarf star Wolf 359. He's stuck on a scientific survey mission of indeterminate length, 7.8 light years from Earth. His only company on board the station are stern mission chief Minkowski, insane science officer Hilbert, and Hephaestus Station's sentient, often malfunctioning operating system Hera. He doesn't have much to do for his job other than monitoring static and intercepting the occasional decades-old radio broadcast from Earth, so he spends most of his time creating extensive audio logs about the ordinary, day-to-day happenings within the station. But the Hephaestus is an odd place, and life in extremely isolated, zero gravity conditions has a way of doing funny things to people's minds. Even the simplest of tasks can turn into a gargantuan struggle, and the most ordinary-seeming things have a way of turning into anything but that. Wolf 359 is a radio drama in the tradition of Golden Age of Radio shows. Take one part space-faring adventure, add one part character drama, and mix in one part absurdist sitcom, and you get Wolf 359. New episodes are released every two weeks.

Read more

Life's not easy for Doug Eiffel, the communications officer for the U.S.S. Hephaestus Research Station, currently on Day 448 of its orbit around red dwarf star Wolf 359. He's stuck on a scientific survey mission of indeterminate length, 7.8 light years from Earth. His only company on board the station are stern mission chief Minkowski, insane science officer Hilbert, and Hephaestus Station's sentient, often malfunctioning operating system Hera. He doesn't have much to do for his job other than monitoring static and intercepting the occasional decades-old radio broadcast from Earth, so he spends most of his time creating extensive audio logs about the ordinary, day-to-day happenings within the station. But the Hephaestus is an odd place, and life in extremely isolated, zero gravity conditions has a way of doing funny things to people's minds. Even the simplest of tasks can turn into a gargantuan struggle, and the most ordinary-seeming things have a way of turning into anything but that. Wolf 359 is a radio drama in the tradition of Golden Age of Radio shows. Take one part space-faring adventure, add one part character drama, and mix in one part absurdist sitcom, and you get Wolf 359. New episodes are released every two weeks.

iTunes Ratings

2757 Ratings
Average Ratings
2601
89
30
17
20

Late to the party

By brosecki - Nov 28 2019
Read more
Not sure how/why it took me so long to discover this, but it’s definitely one of top 5 podcasts in the universe.

Sad

By Benuathanasia - Nov 24 2019
Read more
I just discovered this series two weeks ago. I’m heartbroken to be finished with it. I hope some network picks it up as a series.

iTunes Ratings

2757 Ratings
Average Ratings
2601
89
30
17
20

Late to the party

By brosecki - Nov 28 2019
Read more
Not sure how/why it took me so long to discover this, but it’s definitely one of top 5 podcasts in the universe.

Sad

By Benuathanasia - Nov 24 2019
Read more
I just discovered this series two weeks ago. I’m heartbroken to be finished with it. I hope some network picks it up as a series.

Listen to:

Cover image of Wolf 359

Wolf 359

Updated 4 days ago

Read more

Life's not easy for Doug Eiffel, the communications officer for the U.S.S. Hephaestus Research Station, currently on Day 448 of its orbit around red dwarf star Wolf 359. He's stuck on a scientific survey mission of indeterminate length, 7.8 light years from Earth. His only company on board the station are stern mission chief Minkowski, insane science officer Hilbert, and Hephaestus Station's sentient, often malfunctioning operating system Hera. He doesn't have much to do for his job other than monitoring static and intercepting the occasional decades-old radio broadcast from Earth, so he spends most of his time creating extensive audio logs about the ordinary, day-to-day happenings within the station. But the Hephaestus is an odd place, and life in extremely isolated, zero gravity conditions has a way of doing funny things to people's minds. Even the simplest of tasks can turn into a gargantuan struggle, and the most ordinary-seeming things have a way of turning into anything but that. Wolf 359 is a radio drama in the tradition of Golden Age of Radio shows. Take one part space-faring adventure, add one part character drama, and mix in one part absurdist sitcom, and you get Wolf 359. New episodes are released every two weeks.

Episode 61: Brave New World

Podcast cover
Read more

Please be advised this episode of Wolf 359 contains violence and the use of firearms. Listener discretion is advised.

Our finale episode. Faced with a choice between finally going home and stopping Pryce and Cutter's master plan, the crew of the Hephaestus heads towards their final confrontation with their enemies, their past selves, and each other. Plus, the Doug Eiffel Fastball Special, the lies we tell ourselves, another bad plan, cool stuff with robots, and one day more.

Dec 26 2017

2hr 9mins

Play

Episode 60: Terms and Conditions

Podcast cover
Read more

Please be advised this episode of Wolf 359 contains instances of violence and use of firearms. Listener discretion is advised.

With the wayward pod successfully recovered but Doctor Pryce still in the hands of the rebellious crew, Cutter must find a way to defuse an explosive hostage situation. Will the uneasy truces formed during the state of emergency last long enough for both sides to reach a diplomatic compromise? Or will Cutter and his operatives resort to more... extreme measures in an attempt to give the conflict a more permanent solution? Plus, a homecoming of sorts, supportive company culture, rashness, impulsivity, and a hell of a sunset. 

Dec 12 2017

46mins

Play

Episode 3: Discomforts, Pains, and Irregularities

Podcast cover
Read more

The time arrives for another one of Dr. Hilbert’s infamous biannual physical and wellness checks, causing Eiffel and Minkowski to descend into a state of panic. With life and limb on the line, they each find creative ways to delay the inevitable: Eiffel through one of his patented mendacity-filled schemes, Minkowski through a very unusual discovery in the station’s greenhouse. Plus, manual resets, meditations on the effects of sticks and stones, anesthetics, the limits of anesthetics, and spinal fluid samples.

Aug 15 2014

16mins

Play

Episode 38: Happy Endings

Podcast cover
Read more

Preparations are underway to deal with the next contact anomaly from Wolf 359. But the old crew of the Hephaestus is still unsure what preparations they should make to deal with Colonel Kepler and his team, and the divide in strategies is only getting sharper. Hoping to bring an end to the standstill, Dr. Hilbert decides to try a more radical approach, and seek help from an unlikely source. Plus, the Midnight Society, botanical incidents, inane military mantras, perfectly equitable solutions, and a little Easter Egg.

Sep 05 2016

36mins

Play

Episode 56: Idle Hands

Podcast cover
Read more

Please be advised this episode of Wolf 359 contains disturbing content. Listener discretion is advised.

Part one of two. With the crew brainwashed into doing their bidding and Hera forced to comply with her creator's wishes, Pryce and Cutter seem to be in complete control of the Hephaestus. But when a a small flaw in their plan and an unexpected opportunity present themselves, will Lovelace be able to fight back against Command and their agents? Plus, small island nations, friendly faces, new recurring nightmares, ice cream scoopers, and slow, painful, entirely avoidable deaths. 

Nov 01 2017

40mins

Play

Episode 37: Overture

Podcast cover
Read more

When Jacobi repeatedly tries - and fails - to put an additional signal receiver in orbit around Wolf 359, most of the crew writes off the endeavor as a lost cause. However, when the Hephaestus is hit by an unexpected series of stellar flares and the strongest musical transmission to date, they might finally be able to get some hard data on the origin of the deep space signals - if they are able to accomplish that seemingly impossible task. Plus, breakfast burritos, insights from Doug Eiffel, violent decompression, the Death Vortex of Death, and a perfect Sunday afternoon. 

Jun 28 2016

33mins

Play

Special Episode: Change of Mind

Podcast cover
Read more

Please be advised this episode of Wolf 359 contains violence. Listener discretion is advised.

Captain Lovelace, commanding officer of the U.S.S. Hephaestus Station, is not having a great week. She's butting heads with Communications Officer Lambert, her pedantic second-in-command. Doctors Hui and Fourier, her astrophysicists, seem more interested in an upcoming stellar flare than in basic station safety. Her engineer, Fisher, is getting fed up with the constant bickering, and her chief science officer, Doctor Selberg, isn't exactly... dependable. But things really take a turn for the worse when her superiors at Command decide it's time to put her crew through a very special training exercise, one carefully tailored to get under their skin. Lovelace, Lambert, and the rest of the crew must come together if they hope to make it through the longest, strangest, and most dangerous day of their expedition so far. Plus, apoplectic fugue states, emotional decision-making, corporate acid trips, never-before-seen attractions, and work of real substance.

Jun 09 2017

2hr 8mins

Play

Episode 58: Quiet, Please

Podcast cover
Read more

Please be advised this episode of Wolf 359 contains instances of violence and body horror. Listener discretion is advised.

Having freed themselves from Pryce's mind control, Eiffel, Minkowski, Hera, Lovelace, and Jacobi need to come up with a plan for how to escape from the Hephaestus. But their new scheme will force them to face a formidable challenge: getting through the Sol's security system, an obstacle unlike any they have ever faced before. Plus, nice blunt objects, partial intelligence, mischief specialists, traumatized breaking down, and the creepiest place in the star system.

Nov 14 2017

36mins

Play

Episode 55: A Place For Everything

Podcast cover
Read more

Please be advised this episode of Wolf 359 contains disturbing content, threats of violence, and firearms. Listener discretion is advised.

Following Eiffel's sudden disappearance, Minkowski and the crew work overtime to try to locate their missing Communications Officer. But when they instead make contact with Command agents en route to the station, the team must make some very difficult decisions about how to handle this new threat. Plus, hands-on work, very slim chances, the kill squad, participation awards, and the image of God. 

Oct 03 2017

39mins

Play

Episode 57: The Devil's Plaything

Podcast cover
Read more

Please be advised this episode of Wolf 359 contains violence. Listener discretion is advised.

Part two of two. Newly released from Pryce's mental control, Eiffel works with Lovelace and Hera to try to save the rest of the crew. But as the situation becomes more and more volatile - and as their enemies get more and more suspicious - will the communications officer be able to retain his newfound freedom? Plus, commemorative plaques, security breaches, crossed wires, dexterous digits, and a fireworks show from the perspective of the fireworks. 

Nov 04 2017

34mins

Play

Episode 59: Crash and Burn

Podcast cover
Read more

Trapped with Kepler and Pryce on board a jettisoned pod from the Sol, Eiffel and Minkowski must find a way to avoid all manner of imminent death. Before too long, a delicate truce has been struck, as both sides try to find a way out of their predicament. But how long can a fragile ceasefire last in such a volatile situation? And will their respective allies on the Hephaestus come to the rescue... or throw yet another monkey-wrench into the proceedings? Plus, signature looks, Chinny-Chin-Chins, limited vocabularies, very motivational singing, and the "Life Ruiner of the Year" competition!

Nov 30 2017

36mins

Play

Episode 54: The Watchtower

Podcast cover
Read more

Slowly floating towards Wolf 359, untethered and separated from everyone else on the crew, Officer Eiffel tries a radical approach to solving the aliens' riddle. However, it's only a matter of time before he realizes the situation might be more complicated, more unpredictable, and more dangerous than he ever imagined. Plus, a place where the sidewalk ends, very necessary drama, the immortal words of Marvin Gaye, a momentary road bump, and the express train to Grand Central.

Sep 18 2017

44mins

Play

Episode 4: Cataracts and Hurricanoes

Podcast cover
Read more

Eiffel takes a quick trip to the exterior of the Hephaestus in pursuit of a cleaner reading of one of the mysterious space transmissions. Things seem to be going well – until an unexpected stellar flare leaves Eiffel stranded outside of the station. Will Commander Minkowski be willing to launch a dangerous rescue mission to save her communications officer? Plus, air guitar solos, dramatic irony, complimentary electroshock therapy, jetpacks, and the realm of the Alpha and the Omega.

Aug 29 2014

16mins

Play

Episode 47: Into the Depths

Podcast cover
Read more

Please be advised this episode of Wolf 359 contains violence. Listener discretion is advised.

The crew of the Hephaestus's day just got a whole lot worse. The funeral they were holding was interrupted by one of the deceased seemingly coming back to life, their station is being battered by radiation, and Hera has gone offline. And - oh yes - the alien contact event they've been hearing so much about has only just started. It's going to take everything the beleaguered team has to weather the storm, deal with the two enemy prisoners in their midst, and come to grips with what's happened to Captain Lovelace. Plus, a chain reaction, trash duty, cool dental plans, the sacred tradition of "Nose Goes," and why we get into trouble. 

Jun 13 2017

44mins

Play

Episode 35: Need to Know

Podcast cover
Read more

As they struggle with a demanding schedule, an expanding workload, and Colonel Kepler's growing secrecy, tensions amongst the crew members - both old and new - are on the verge of a breaking point. But when a technical glitch gives Minkowski, Lovelace, Hera, Jacobi, and Maxwell a chance to peak behind the curtain, they soon discover they might be in over their heads. Plus, the Dick Dastardly Administration, self-evident statements, basic motor control, pathological fears, and hostile assaults on the senses.

May 30 2016

32mins

Play

Episode 39: All Things Considered

Podcast cover
Read more

After a technical mishap causes Jacobi's latest experimental gizmo to discharge within the Urania, a number of the SI-5's personal items are vented into space. A furious Colonel Kepler assembles everyone who was involved, hell bent on determining which of his underlings is at fault. But when Minkowski, Jacobi, and Eiffel each present wildly different accounts of the event, he and Captain Lovelace discover that determining the why, the how, the when, and the who is responsible for this snafu might be trickier than it first appears. Plus, willful destruction of property, outright libel, Thunderdome, excellent opportunities for science, and Exit 101.

Sep 19 2016

27mins

Play

Episode 40: Limbo

Podcast cover
Read more

While most of the crew tries to enjoy a rare moment of downtime, Doctor Maxwell discovers some previously undetected flaws in the station's systems. When her suspicions about these faults are proven right, the crew is forced to have a series of unexpected and difficult conversations. Plus, the Cybermen Appreciation Society, Cold Shower September, the master of the prank, everlasting funstoppers, and a big pink Heffalump that only you can see. 

Oct 04 2016

35mins

Play

Episode 36: Fire and Brimstone

Podcast cover
Read more

An accident leaves Dr. Maxwell in imminent danger and the entire station in a state of emergency. The crew scrambles to mount a rescue, but when Kepler and Minkowski disagree over which is the best way to conduct the operation and which way will get them all killed, long simmering tensions between the current and the former commanders come to a head. Can the fractured crew come together in time to prevent a catastrophe? Plus, towering infernos, strategic advantages, rank insubordination, the crazy train, and a very judicious application of explosives.

Jun 14 2016

29mins

Play

Episode 5: Cigarette Candy

Podcast cover
Read more

A mysterious illness strikes Eiffel, quickly leaving him out of commission and bedridden. It falls on Dr. Hilbert’s medical expertise to find some way to get the Communications Officer back to full health. But as the days go by, Eiffel begins to suspect that something more sinister is afoot and starts to question whether Hilbert is curing the disease or causing it. Plus, medicinal lozenges, morbilliform, the full Nick Riviera, swollen glands, and looking on the bright, sunshiny side.

Sep 12 2014

19mins

Play

Episode 41: Memoria

Podcast cover
Read more

With Hera out of commission, Doctor Maxwell attempts a difficult reconstructive procedure on the unresponsive autopilot program. Before she can even begin, however, she will have to navigate through the shifting landscape of Hera’s memory banks, a task infinitely more complex than it might appear at first glance. Plus, subjective realities, really loud pinball machines, deleted scenes, attempted crew member homicide, and a backdoor into the subconscious.

Oct 19 2016

41mins

Play

Zero Hours: A New Series From The Wolf 359 Crew

Podcast cover
Read more

Hello Dear Listeners!  We're re-activating the Wolf 359 feed for a very special announcement from the man of a thousand voices himself, Zach Valenti. The creative team behind Wolf 359 has just released a brand-new audio drama anthology series called Zero Hours

We think it's pretty neat, and so we wanted share the first episode, which features a couple other voices you're probably familiar with... 

We hope you enjoy, and you can check out the rest of Zero Hours at www.zerohourspodcast.com

Oct 21 2019

38mins

Play

Mini Episode: Space Rage

Podcast cover
Read more

Faced with yet another affront to his dignity, Communications Officer Eiffel expresses his frustrations the only way he knows how - through the miracle of radio. 

Written by Zach Valenti, Sarah Shachat, and Gabriel Urbina. Directed by Gabriel Urbina. Performed by Zach Valenti and Emma Sherr-Ziarko. Original music by Alan Rodi. Originally commissioned by Spoke. 

Dec 24 2018

4mins

Play

Mini Episode: Step One

Podcast cover
Read more

Forced to deal with the unique challenge of figuring out how to put on a space suit, Communications Officer Eiffel does his best to break it down into small, manageable steps.

Written by Zach Valenti, Sarah Shachat, and Gabriel Urbina. Directed by Gabriel Urbina. Performed by Zach Valenti. Original music by Alan Rodi. Originally commissioned by Spoke. 

Dec 24 2018

5mins

Play

Mini Episode: Adventure of a Lifetime

Podcast cover
Read more

Communications Officer Eiffel explores the far reaches of the Hephaestus, and goes on a journey like no other.

Written by Zach Valenti, Sarah Shachat, and Gabriel Urbina. Directed by Gabriel Urbina. Performed by Zach Valenti. Original music by Alan Rodi. Originally commissioned by Spoke. 

Dec 24 2018

4mins

Play

Special Announcement: Pryce and Carter's DSSPPM and Three New Mini Episodes!

Podcast cover
Read more

It's been one year since the release of our finale episode! To commemorate the occasion, we are finally releasing the full version of Pryce and Carter's Deep Space Survival Procedure and Protocol Manual, as well as three new mini episodes. Happy Holidays!

Dec 24 2018

2mins

Play

One Year Later... What Has the Wolf 359 Team Been Up To?

Podcast cover
Read more

Well... it's been a while. 

Can you believe almost a full year has gone by since the end of Wolf 359? Saying that feels very surreal to all of us at Kinda Evil Genius HQ. And lately a lot of people have been asking us: what has everyone on the cast and crew been working on lately? 

Honestly?

A lot of stuff.

New audio dramas! New talk shows! Getting advanced degrees! Modeling! Adventures in the world of tech! Big writing projects! Experimental cross-media performance art! Landscape architecture! So! Much! Stuff!

But seriously: when we stopped to take stock of how much cool work folks were doing, we thought it might nice to share the latest from the team with all of you. So fire up the old podcasting apps, and join Doug Eiffel himself, Zach Valenti, for a whirlwind update on what some of the cast and crew have been up to this year.

Nov 14 2018

10mins

Play

Episode 61: Brave New World

Podcast cover
Read more

Please be advised this episode of Wolf 359 contains violence and the use of firearms. Listener discretion is advised.

Our finale episode. Faced with a choice between finally going home and stopping Pryce and Cutter's master plan, the crew of the Hephaestus heads towards their final confrontation with their enemies, their past selves, and each other. Plus, the Doug Eiffel Fastball Special, the lies we tell ourselves, another bad plan, cool stuff with robots, and one day more.

Dec 26 2017

2hr 9mins

Play

One Last Thing Before the Finale...

Podcast cover
Read more

Before you dive into our finale episode, one last quick announcement from the show's producers. Thank you to everyone for three and a half amazing years!

Dec 26 2017

3mins

Play

Mission Mishaps: Happy Holidays

Podcast cover
Read more

Mission Mishaps, entry eight. SI-5 surveillance log. Entry #CRT004. Maxwell and Jacobi try to talk their way out of a mandatory assignment.

Dec 24 2017

11mins

Play

Special Episode - Volte Face

Podcast cover
Read more

Investigative reporter Andrea Nash is having a very good day. She's flown halfway around the world on a very special assignment: an exclusive interview with Marcus Cutter, the infamous Director of Communications for Goddard Futuristics. It's a shot at journalism greatness, and Nash intends to make the most of it. But as she gets closer and closer to unearthing the earth-shaking story she's after, her subject gets more and more defensive... and starts considering more radical means of eliminating the unwanted attention. Plus, terrors to work for, a big, honking private plane, the charms of analog recorders, things no monkey could ever manage, and the fiery intensity of a thousand burning suns.

Dec 21 2017

58mins

Play

Episode 60: Terms and Conditions

Podcast cover
Read more

Please be advised this episode of Wolf 359 contains instances of violence and use of firearms. Listener discretion is advised.

With the wayward pod successfully recovered but Doctor Pryce still in the hands of the rebellious crew, Cutter must find a way to defuse an explosive hostage situation. Will the uneasy truces formed during the state of emergency last long enough for both sides to reach a diplomatic compromise? Or will Cutter and his operatives resort to more... extreme measures in an attempt to give the conflict a more permanent solution? Plus, a homecoming of sorts, supportive company culture, rashness, impulsivity, and a hell of a sunset. 

Dec 12 2017

46mins

Play

Mission Mishaps: No Complaints

Podcast cover
Read more

Mission Mishaps, Entry Seven. SI-5 Surveillance Log. Entry #FRD916. Kepler and Jacobi try to keep themselves entertained during a stakeout.

Dec 06 2017

11mins

Play

Episode 59: Crash and Burn

Podcast cover
Read more

Trapped with Kepler and Pryce on board a jettisoned pod from the Sol, Eiffel and Minkowski must find a way to avoid all manner of imminent death. Before too long, a delicate truce has been struck, as both sides try to find a way out of their predicament. But how long can a fragile ceasefire last in such a volatile situation? And will their respective allies on the Hephaestus come to the rescue... or throw yet another monkey-wrench into the proceedings? Plus, signature looks, Chinny-Chin-Chins, limited vocabularies, very motivational singing, and the "Life Ruiner of the Year" competition!

Nov 30 2017

36mins

Play

Mission Mishaps: Cold Turkey

Podcast cover
Read more

Mission Mishaps, Entry Six. Hephaestus Log #TRK536. Day five hundred and fifty-three. Eiffel takes the lead on cooking dinner for the crew's second Thanksgiving on the Hephaestus.

Nov 22 2017

13mins

Play

Episode 58: Quiet, Please

Podcast cover
Read more

Please be advised this episode of Wolf 359 contains instances of violence and body horror. Listener discretion is advised.

Having freed themselves from Pryce's mind control, Eiffel, Minkowski, Hera, Lovelace, and Jacobi need to come up with a plan for how to escape from the Hephaestus. But their new scheme will force them to face a formidable challenge: getting through the Sol's security system, an obstacle unlike any they have ever faced before. Plus, nice blunt objects, partial intelligence, mischief specialists, traumatized breaking down, and the creepiest place in the star system.

Nov 14 2017

36mins

Play

Mission Mishaps: Lights Out

Podcast cover
Read more

Mission Mishaps, Entry Five. Hephaestus Log #WYL320. Day four hundred and eighty-seven. Eiffel reads scary stories and hears something in the dark.

Nov 08 2017

12mins

Play

Episode 57: The Devil's Plaything

Podcast cover
Read more

Please be advised this episode of Wolf 359 contains violence. Listener discretion is advised.

Part two of two. Newly released from Pryce's mental control, Eiffel works with Lovelace and Hera to try to save the rest of the crew. But as the situation becomes more and more volatile - and as their enemies get more and more suspicious - will the communications officer be able to retain his newfound freedom? Plus, commemorative plaques, security breaches, crossed wires, dexterous digits, and a fireworks show from the perspective of the fireworks. 

Nov 04 2017

34mins

Play

Episode 56: Idle Hands

Podcast cover
Read more

Please be advised this episode of Wolf 359 contains disturbing content. Listener discretion is advised.

Part one of two. With the crew brainwashed into doing their bidding and Hera forced to comply with her creator's wishes, Pryce and Cutter seem to be in complete control of the Hephaestus. But when a a small flaw in their plan and an unexpected opportunity present themselves, will Lovelace be able to fight back against Command and their agents? Plus, small island nations, friendly faces, new recurring nightmares, ice cream scoopers, and slow, painful, entirely avoidable deaths. 

Nov 01 2017

40mins

Play

Mission Mishaps: The Veldt

Podcast cover
Read more

Mission Mishaps, entry four. Hephaestus Log #NOL858. Day 411. Eiffel ventures into the greenhouse.

Oct 28 2017

8mins

Play

Mission Mishaps: You Want, I Solve

Podcast cover
Read more

Mission Mishaps, entry three. Hephaestus Log #WME389. Day three-hundred and seventy-two. Eiffel encounters a stowaway.

Oct 12 2017

10mins

Play