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The Science of Success

Updated 3 days ago

Rank #169 in Education category

Business
Education
Entrepreneurship
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The #1 Evidence Based Growth Podcast on the Internet. The Science of Success is about the search for evidence based personal growth. It's about exploring ways to improve your decision-making, understand your mind and how psychology rules the world around you, and learn from experts and thought leaders about ways we can become better versions of ourselves.

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The #1 Evidence Based Growth Podcast on the Internet. The Science of Success is about the search for evidence based personal growth. It's about exploring ways to improve your decision-making, understand your mind and how psychology rules the world around you, and learn from experts and thought leaders about ways we can become better versions of ourselves.

iTunes Ratings

667 Ratings
Average Ratings
577
48
15
14
13

Really good podcast. Highly recommend it.

By ejtc1 - Oct 22 2019
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One of my favorite for some years now. Thanks, Matt

Great podcast, precise to the point, pragmatic

By Nasib Nia - Oct 02 2019
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Best podcast ever! Thank you so much for super valuable interviews and materials.

iTunes Ratings

667 Ratings
Average Ratings
577
48
15
14
13

Really good podcast. Highly recommend it.

By ejtc1 - Oct 22 2019
Read more
One of my favorite for some years now. Thanks, Matt

Great podcast, precise to the point, pragmatic

By Nasib Nia - Oct 02 2019
Read more
Best podcast ever! Thank you so much for super valuable interviews and materials.

Listen to:

Cover image of The Science of Success

The Science of Success

Updated 3 days ago

Read more

The #1 Evidence Based Growth Podcast on the Internet. The Science of Success is about the search for evidence based personal growth. It's about exploring ways to improve your decision-making, understand your mind and how psychology rules the world around you, and learn from experts and thought leaders about ways we can become better versions of ourselves.

Dr. Brené Brown: The Can’t Miss Interview On Shame, Self Worth Empathy & Living a Courageous Life

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In this episode we welcome legendary researcher Dr Brené Brown to the Science of Success. We discuss vulnerability and learn that vulnerability is not weakness, it’s not oversharing, it’s not soft. We learn that even brave and courageous people are scared all the time. We discuss the incredible power of learning to get back up when you’re down, how you can stop caring about what other people think about you, and much more in this in depth interview. Dr Brené Brown is a research professor at the University of Houston where she holds the Huffington Foundation – Brené Brown Endowed Chair at The Graduate College of Social Work. She is the author of five #1 New York Times bestsellers: The Gifts of Imperfection, Daring Greatly, Rising Strong, Braving the Wilderness, and her latest book, Dare to Lead, which is the culmination of a seven-year study on courage and leadership. Brené’s TED talk – The Power of Vulnerability – is one of the top five most viewed TED talks in the world with over 35 million views. She is also the first researcher to have a filmed talk on Netflix, “The Call to Courage” which debuted in April 2019.Life is about the willingness to show up, to put yourself out there, to be all in, when you can’t control the outcome It’s not the critic who counts - it’s easy to spend your life in the cheap seats and hurl judgement at people who are trying and failing Our society doesn’t teach people how to get back up when the fall. Everyone spends their whole life tiptoeing around to ensure they never fall, but the more important skill is to build the skill of GETTING BACK UP. The importance of experiencing adversity. There’s a line between adversity and trauma, we need to experience. It’s not about being perfect at walking, it’s about LEARNING THE SKILL SET OF GETTING BACK UP AGAIN AND AGAINCourage is learnable, teachable, and measurable Courage is essentially the same thing as vulnerability. The Willingness to show up, put yourself out there, and be seen when you can’t control the outcome. Vulnerability, at its core, is about Uncertainty, Risk, and Emotional Exposure“There is no courage without vulnerability” Vulnerability is not as hard, scary, or dangerous as getting to the end of your life and asking “what if I would have shown up?"One of the most defining lessons of Brene’s seven-year study on leadership is the importance of courageous leadership. Even brave and courageous people are scared all the time. It’s not fear that gets in the way of us being brave or vulnerable, it’s armor. What is your go-to armor? How do you self protect when you feel emotionally at risk or exposed?How do you start to take off the armor? Loving kindness and self-compassion. When you work so hard to keep the peace on the outside, you wage a war internally. It’s not your job to make sure you don’t disappoint anyone.You can replace the armor with something that helps you - CURIOSITYGet curious about how you’re showing up, is it serving you? Are you self protecting in a way that’s keeping you small? Your brain thinks in stories - it builds and creates stories to explain the world around you - even if those stories are wrong.A lot of the time we create stories that don’t reflect reality in any way. Why you should start using “The story I'm telling myself…” or “The story I’m making up right now is…"Homework: Take the daring leader survey. Homework: Educate yourself. Watch her TED talk, her Netflix special, read her books. Creating a shared vocabulary is the root of change.
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Jun 27 2019

50mins

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Everything You Know About Sleep Is Wrong with Dr. Matthew Walker

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In this episode we discuss everything you ever wanted to know about sleep. We examine the findings from hundreds of studies across millions of people and pull out the major findings about how vitally important sleep is, the global sleep loss epidemic, the stunning data about sleep and productivity, the simplest and most effective evidence based strategies for getting better sleep and much more with Dr. Matthew Walker.
 
 Dr. Matthew Walker is Professor of Neuroscience and Psychology at the University of California, Berkeley, and Founder and Director of the Center for Human Sleep Science. He has published over 100 scientific studies and is the author of the book Why We Sleep: Unlocking the Power of Sleep and Dreams. Which is currently the #1 Amazon Bestseller in Neuroscience . He has been featured on numerous television and radio outlets, including CBS 60 Minutes, National Geographic Channel, NOVA Science, NRP and the BBC.Global sleep loss epidimic - the average American sleeps only 6.5 hours per nightSleep has slowly been eroded by our society over the last 60 yearsSleep is vital and essential from an evolutionary standpoint - you can’t just lop off 25% of the necessary sleep you need If you sleep less, you will be dead sooner, lack of sleep kills your more quicklyLack of sleep is a major predictor of “all cause mortality” including cancer, alzheimers, heart disease, stroke, diabetes, depression, and suicideHard science shows why a lack of sleep is tremendously bad for youSleep has an image problem, we stigmatize sleep and think its lazy and slothful - people wear lack of sleep as a badge of honor to be celebratedThe 5 clear truths of sleep research and productivity
Under-slept employees take on less challenging problems
They produce fewer creative solutions
They exert less effort when working in groups (slacking off, social loafing)
They are more likely to lie, cheat, and engage in deviant behavior
The more or less sleep that a CEO has had, the more or less charismatic they will be
Chronic exhaustion cost most first world nation 2% of the GDP - 411 billion dollars lost each year to a lack of sleepThe evidence is resoundingly clear - cutting on sleep makes you less productive and less creative and less effectiveAfter being awake for 21 hours, you’re as cognitively imparied as someoen who is legally drunkThe two principle types of sleep - REM sleep and non-REM sleepThe different stages of sleep - the 4 stages of REM sleepHard science shows that deep Sleep is critical to clearing toxins out of your brainSleep is like a sewage system for your brian - it cleans all the toxins and debris out of your brainThe less sleep you have, the higher your probability of getting alzheimersDifferent cognitive systems in your brain also work during sleep - its like saving files to a hard drive, you have to sleep to get the save button
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Jan 04 2018

1hr 6mins

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Research Reveals How You Can Create The Mindset of a Champion with Dr. Carol Dweck

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This episode is all about MINDSET. What is a mindset? What is the fixed mindset and how does it shape the way we act in the world, what is the growth mindset and how can it transform the way we live our lives? We look at research data from over 168,000 students, examine the mindset of champions, the dangers of blame and excuses, and much more with Dr. Carol Dweck.
  
 Dr. Carol Dweck is a Professor of Psychology at Stanford University and a member of the American Academy of Arts and Sciences. She is the author of the best-selling book Mindset: The New Psychology of Success - which is one of the single most important books in shaping my life. Her work has been featured in several publications including The New York Times, Washington Post, The Today Show, 20/20 and many more.
  
What is a mindset?What is the fixed mindset?We go deep into the “fixed mindset” and how they view challenges and the worldWhat is effort and how does the fixed mindset perceive it?Is effort necessary to be successful or is it a sign that you’re not naturally talented?If you have a fixed mindset, how do you think about criticism?Do you often “need to be right?” - and how could that need be impacting your life?We examine in detail what the “growth mindset” is and what underpins its core perception of realitySetbacks are welcome and setbacks are inevitableThis fundamental conclusion is backed by 35+ years of psychological research, hundreds of studies, and moreA study of over 168,000 students (the entire 10th grade population of Chile) demonstrating all of these findings Research data from everything from dating life to conflict in the middle east bears out the lessons of fixed vs growth mindsetWhat is the most effective way to recover from devastating rejections?Is it possible to change your mindset?How to transform your mindset and specific steps you can take to move towards a growth mindsetHow to find the things that trigger your fixed mindset reactionsDiscover and name your “fixed mindset persona”Success as improvement vs success as superioritySelf handicapping and the concept that effort robs you of your excusesRepairing your self esteem vs repairing your failureIt’s impossible to learn from a mistake if you deny making it in the first placeThe grave danger of placing blame, making excuses, and denying failure in order to protect your self esteemThe mindset of a champion and how champions rise to the occasionViewing people as judges vs viewing people as alliesHow do we reconcile the lessons of mindset with the idea that you should focus on your strengths?What are the most common triggers of the fixed mindset?
Taking on a challenge, out of your comfort zone
Struggling, not making progress
Setback, criticism, failure
Strength and weakness are much more dynamic than we understand or give them credit forDon think your strengths will be strengths forever if you don't work on them and grow themThe dangers of the self esteem movement and how it actually cultivates the fixed mindset
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May 25 2017

53mins

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Simple Strategies You Can Use To Persuade Anyone with The Godfather of Influence Dr. Robert Cialdini

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In this episode we discuss an old trick palm readers use that you can leverage to get people to do what you want, why persuasion does not lie just in the message itself, but rather in how the message is presented, what the research reveals about why the context matters as much, if not more, than the content itself, why you shouldn’t ask people for their opinion but instead ask someone for their advice, how small differences that seem trivial make a HUGE impact on human behavior, and much more with Dr. Robert Cialdini.
  
 Dr. Robert Cialdini is the president and CEO of Influence at works. He is the multi best selling author of Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion, and his latest book Pre-Suasion: A Revolutionary Way To Influence and Persuade and he is currently a regions professor eremites of psychology and marketing at the Arizona State University . Commonly referred to as “The Godfather Of Influence” Robert’s work has been featured around the world with clients such as Google, Microsoft, IBM, The Department of Justice, and more.
  
 We discuss:
Research reveals that getting you to pay attention to something doesn't just reveal who you are, it makes you who you areHow small differences that seem trivial make a HUGE impact on human behaviorWhy most people don't’ recognize the subconscious priming of pre-suasionLessons from Dr. Cialdini's time as an amateur palm readerHow researchers boosted their response rate from 29% to 77.3% with one simple questionCan a photo change your ability to solve problems more effectively?How you can create a state of mind in your recipient that is consistent with the message you’re about to giveHow getting people to reflect on a particular trait that they might have can prime them to respond to what you want them to doHow you can get people to think of themselves as whatever you want them to beThis one trick palm readers use that you can leverage to get people to do what you wantPersuasion does not lie just in the message itself, but rather in how the message is presented"Tell me what you’re paying attention to, and I'll tell you who you are"Does it matter what store you’re standing in front of if you ask a woman for her number at the mall?Why Pre-suasion is "a dangerous stick of dynamite"The medium is the message, the messenger is the message, and the multitude is the message - the true power of authority and social proofWhat does the United Kingdom’s tax policy have to do with creating more influential communicationLearning what most others are doing is a message itselfContext matters as much as or more than contentHow can you ethically leverage the concepts of persuasion?One thing you can do to hack job interviews using this simple tacticWhy you shouldn’t ask people for their opinion but instead ask someone for their adviceWhy its better to ask for $75,123.00 than $75,000.Ask yourself “What is it about my message that will make it most wise for people to say yes to it”Is it possible to use pre-suasion on ourselves?How changing a simple image can improve your ability to solve problems by more than 48%The best thing you can do to prime someone for change (the simple easy thing you can to do to get people to change)And much more! 
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Aug 10 2017

40mins

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How To Master Emotional Intelligence & Why Your IQ Won’t Make You Successful with Dr. Daniel Goleman

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In this episode, we talk about Emotional Intelligence. What is emotional intelligence and why does it matter so much? How the science demonstrates that emotional intelligence matters far more than IQ, how you can develop and improve your “EQ”, how to build the muscle of focus, and much more with Dr. Daniel Goleman.
 
 Daniel is a co-founder of the Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning. He currently co-directs the Consortium for Research on Emotional Intelligence in Organizations at Rutgers University. He is the international best-selling author of several books including Primal Leadership, Focus, and Emotional Intelligence which has been translated into over 40 languages.
  
 WE DISCUSS:What is emotional intelligence and why does it matter so much?The 4 pillars of emotional intelligenceIs IQ or EQ more important, which correlates more with success?Why IQ is more of a threshold, and EQ scales more with people’s actual results in the worldHow the science of “competence modeling” demonstrates that emotional intelligence matters far more than IQ, the more successful you become Which of the four pillars of EQ do people struggle with the most?The 3 varieties of empathy - cognitive empathy, emotional empathy, and empathic concernThe mental exercises you can do to strengthen certain brain circuitry required to build emotional intelligenceHow to cultivate and strengthen emotional self controlWhat the science say about ways to strenghten the prefrontal cortext around controling your amygdalaThe mind is a muscle and basic repetition strengthens your circuitryThe hard science behind how to cultivate a positive outlookThe ventilation fallacy and why venting your anger is actually bad for youThe more you rehearse an emotion, the stronger the underlying brain circuitry becomesThe incredible power of seeing your thoughts as thoughts and nothing moreHow to step back and assess your thoughts by asking “Is this helpful?"The power of distraction to shift your thoughts away from anxiety and depressionHow Dr. Goleman defines FOCUS and why it's so importantHow focus and attention are muscles and cultivating them can help strengthen your underlying brain circuitryThe difference between rumination and reflection - and why reflection is so importantHow a Power Nap can restore your brainHow to restore your attention and focus when you find yourself at wit’s end and cannot focus anymoreWhat is PRIMAL Leadership and why is it so important?Why the crucial competencies you need to develop EQ and emotional intelligence are all learned abilitiesHow to give positive feedback and constructive criticism - the right way and the wrong way - don’t attack the PERSON - don’t trigger the negative circuitry, trigger a positive outlook Why managing your own negative emotions is the FIRST STEP towards cultivating emotional intelligenceStep back from your thoughts and ask yourself - is this useful? Cultivate self-awareness
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Mar 02 2017

42mins

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Hack Your Biochemistry To Create Spontaneous Weight Loss and Improved Mental Health by Dr. Kulreet Chaudhary

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In this episode we discuss how neurology's perspective on the brain fundamentally ignores the health of the entire system, we look at your gut biome’s role in depression, mood regulation and how the microbiome controls your behavior and emotions, we ask why it is so hard for people to break negative eating habits, talk about the biochemistry of addiction, the incredible importance of understanding your microbiome and gut health with Dr. Kulreet Chaudhary. 
  
 Dr. Kulreet Chaudhary is a neuroscientist and Ayurveda expert. She has participated in over 20 clinical research studies working with new stem cell therapies for diabetic neuropathy and drug development for the treatment of ALS. Dr. Chaudhary is the author of The Prime: Prepare and Repair Your Body for Spontaneous Weight Loss, and is a regular guest on the Dr. Oz show!
  
How Dr. Chaudhary’s personal experience led her down the path of integrative medicine
The health of the brain is highly dependent on the health of the gut
Auyerveda is the oldest recorded medical system in the world - one of the oldest forms of “lifestyle medicine"
Why food is medicine
How the Neurologist’s perspective on the brain fundamentally ignores the health of the entire system
Dr. Chaudhary’s perspective on how eastern & integrative medicine can be integrated with western science to form a more holistic solution for health
Tumeric is a great example of a spice that has scientifically demonstrated health benefits
Micro-biome & gut health underpins huge medical issues
Western medicine is just now catching up with insights from 5000 year old holistic medicines
90% of your serotonin comes from your gut and gut health is a major factor in depression 
Scientifically, the mind and mental health are deeply connected and directly related gut health
Why is it so hard for people to break negative eating habits? Is it really just a question of willpower?
The neurochemistry and biochemistry that underpins negative eating habits
Your micro biome itself can shift your eating habits and make you desire and consume certain foods
Why 85% of people cannot change the way they are eating with willpower
The biochemistry of addiction and food addiction & the role dopamine plays 
How food scientists have engineered junk food to produce massive dopamine spikes
The dangers of overstimulated dopamine receptors and how they lead to addiction
An obese person’s brain chemistry responds the same way to sugar as a cocaine addict responds to cocaine
Environmental toxins and toxic inflammation and how they impact your body
Enteric nervous system - the “brain inside your gut” which produces 95% of the serotonin and 50% of the dopamine in your body
“The gut does most of the talking and the brain does most of the listening”
Who dictates the content of what the gut says? The Microbiome 
"How smart is your gut?"
How fecal matter transplants in mice can completely reverse genetically engineered personality traits
Research clearly demonstrates that your micro-biome controls your behavior and emotions
We are still in the infancy of discovering and understanding the microbiome - there is a lot of “noise” that’s hard to understand
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Oct 12 2017

58mins

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How To Triple the Rate of Your Success With One Simple Question

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This week we are kicking off a new miniseries within "The Science of Success" called "Weapons of Influence". This is the first in a six-part series based on the best selling book Influence by Robert Cialdini. If you loved that book, this will be a great refresher on the core concepts. And if you haven't yet read it, some of this stuff is gonna blow your mind. 
So what are the 6 weapons of influence?
Reciprocation
Consistency & commitment
Social Proof
Liking
Authority
Scarcity
 Each one of these weapons can be a powerful tool in your belt - and something to watch out for when others try to wield them against you. Alone, each of them can create crazy outcomes in our lives and in social situations, but together they can create huge impacts.
  
 Today’s episode covers the first weapon of influence - Reciprocation Bias - and you'll learn:
How reciprocation creates unequal exchanges, and in one experiment by a factor of more than 500%
Why reciprocation is powerful regardless of how much someone likes you
How giving away flowers help build a powerful religious movement
What made the “rejection and retreat” technique triple the success of an experiment
How to defend against reciprocation bias from negatively impacting your decisions
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Jan 19 2016

29mins

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Using Science to Create the Perfect Day with Caroline Webb

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In this episode, we look at how to use insights from behavioral science to improve your life. We look at what it means to have a “good day” and figure out how to reverse engineer more good days, by examining decision making, the power of rest and recovery, intention setting, setting boundaries, and much more with our guest Caroline Webb. 
  
 Caroline Webb is CEO of Sevenshift, a firm that uses insights from behavioral science to improve their client’s working lives. She was previously a partner at McKinsey consulting and is the best selling author of How To Have A Good Day, which has been published in 16 languages in more than 60 countries. Her work has been featured in Inc., Forbes, Fortune, and much more.
What does it mean to have a good day? What does that have to do with the science of improving your life?
 What is a bad day? what is a good day?
 3 Core things about having a good day
 Working on your priorities
 Feeling that you’re producing great work
 Can it be repeated?
 What is the science behind what actually allows people and organizations to change?
 The two system brain - there are two systems that interact in the brain, as Kahneman called them System 1 and System 2. 
 “System 2” - the slow system, our conscious experience, deliberate thinking mind, but it moves slowly and can only process information slowly and clunkily 
 “System 1” - the automatic system - our subconscious mind, immense processing power, but it often takes shortcuts 
 How do we create the conditions for our deliberate system to be as successful as possible?
 Breaks are not for wimps, breaks are crucial opportunities to reboot your deliberate system and improve your thinking and decision-making
 Frequent, short breaks enormously enhance your mental ability 
 Short cardio activity will boost your focus and mood materially
 When we are resting, we encode and consolidate information - and often create new insight
 When you “single task” you work about 30% faster than someone who is multi-tasking - every time your attention switches, there is a cost in time and processing power
 Why saying "ABCDEFG 1234567” is so much easier than saying "A1, B2, C3, D4, E5, F6, G7”
 What’s the most important thing you’re doing today and how can you get yourself to single task on that?
 Willpower is not the way to create big changes in your life, it's about changing your environment
 Nudges vs Sludges - how to shift your environment to create behavioral change
 Your brain is constantly filtering out a huge amount of information - and whatever is top of mind for you filter your reality
 The hard science of setting your intentions - set what attitude you want to have, what your aim is, what your assumptions are, etc - setting intentions can have a material impact on your behavior
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Apr 19 2018

58mins

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Your Ultimate Guide to Performing Under Pressure and Unleashing Confidence - Dr. Michael Gervais is BACK

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In this episode we go deep into the high performance habits of the worlds top performers, look at the only place confidence truly comes from, dig into why we struggle to perform when the pressure is on, examine the habits, routines, and strategies the world’s absolute best use to perform at their peak, and much more with our guest Dr. Michael Gervais. 
  
 Dr. Michael Gervais is a high performance psychologist who has worked with some of the world’s top performers including the Seattle Seahawks, Felix Baumgartner (The Red Bull Athlete Who Completed the Stratosphere Jump) Olympians, musicians, and champions! His work has been featured on ESPN, CNN, The New York Times, and much more!
We love to put some of the world’s top performers on a pedestal - but there are extraordinary things that take place every day that aren’t capture on the cameras 
Are extraordinary performers born that way? No.
Why do we struggle to perform “when the lights are on”/ “when there is pressure”
Top performers have fundamentally organized their lives around growth and improvement
What does it mean to have your life organized around performance and growth?
There are only 3 things we can train
We can train our body
We can train our craft
We can train our minds
When we look at the best in the world across domains - they are more similar to each other than dissimilar 
Relentless dedication to building and refining their craft
Relentless dedication to building the right body / carriage 
Ability to adapt and be strong from a mental perspective
Provide opportunities to stress the system (mind & body) and to recover the system 
Feedback loops are both internal and external 
The importance of having consequences - both natural/physical consequences and man made consequences
Lessons from working with coach Pete Carroll from the Seattle Seahawks 
Ask yourself: Who in your life helps you be better and what are the characteristics of those people?
Internal feedback loops
How am I doing? How does it feel? Am I executing at the right level?
What is going on in my body?
Being aware of the energy, tension in your body, your thoughts, etc 
External feedback loops - having people in your life who can help you get better
At any given time we can have our attention focused internally or externally - but we can’t spend too much time focused on the internal
To do extraordinary things in life - NOBODY does it alone. We need other people. You have to invest in the true connection with other people. 
The greatest wayfinders, when they set sail, they don’t pray for calm waters, they pray for rugged seas, moving through the rugged seas is what forges strength - that is where you get made, that is where you find your true nature
The brain’s job is to scan the world and see what’s dangerous - but you can’t let the brain have too much control
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Apr 05 2018

1hr 2mins

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The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck with Mark Manson

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In this episode we discuss how to escape the feedback loop from hell, the paradoxical idea of embracing negative experiences, why struggle creates meaning, how discover the false values underpinning your worldview, and how to cultivate the ability to sustain and handle adversity with Mark Manson.
 
Mark is a blogger, author and entrepreneur. Most well-known for his site markmanson.net, where he writes personal development advice that doesn't suck. He also wrote a book called The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck. It doesn't suck, either.
We discuss:Alan Watt’s Backwards Law (and why its so important)How to escape the Feedback Loop From HellThe paradoxical idea of embracing negative experiencesHow your mind invents problems for you every dayWhy Mark gives the advice “don’t try"How to release the judgement of your own emotions The difference between indifference and “not giving a f*ck"The biggest “false values” you cling to that create unhappiness in your lifeWhy "entitlement" is the idea that you deserve happiness and don’t have to struggle for it (and how that causes suffering How to cultivate the ability to sustain and handle adversityWhy the key question to living a better life is NOT “what do I want out of life?"Why struggle creates meaning and its important to feel bad sometimesWhat champions and world class performers focus on every dayWhy you should listen to Disappointment PandaWhy pain is required for growthAnd much more!If you are dealing with a challenge and can't figure out what to do next - listen to this episode! 
Warning this episode has some profanity! 
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Sep 14 2016

46mins

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How To Demolish What’s Holding You Back & Leave Your Comfort Zone with Andy Molinsky

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In this episode we discuss why people struggle to reach outside their comfort zones – and why it’s so critically important that you do, we explore the 5 core psychological road blocks stopping people from stepping outside their comfort zones, we go deep on how you can become tougher, more resilient, and embrace discomfort, how you can master the art of small talk, what you need to do to cultivate the skill of “global dexterity” and much more with Dr. Andy Molinksy.
  
 Dr. Andy Molinsky is a professor of Organizational Behavior and Psychology at Brandeis University. Andy is the author of Reach: A New Strategy to Help You Step Outside Your Comfort Zone, Rise to the Challenge and Build Confidence, as well as Global Dexterity: How to Adapt Your Behavior across Cultures without Losing Yourself in the Process. He has been featured in Inc., Psychology Today, The Harvard Business Review, and was named one of LinkedIn’s Top Voices for 2016.
  
 We discuss:
  
Lessons from interviews with students, teachers, police officers, rabbis, priests, entrepreneurs, goat farmers - and the common lessons of WHY people struggle to step outside their comfort zones
Why do people struggle to reach outside their comfort zones?
The vital importance of stepping outside your comfort zone
The 5 core psychological road blocks / challenges that make it hard to step outside our comfort zones
Authenticity/Identity/Self image
Likability
Competence
Resentment
Morality
Imposter Syndrome and how it can trap you in your comfort zone
Our “amazing capacity” to avoid discomfort and seek relief
What happens when people avoid uncomfortable situations
How we can often create imperfect substitutions for situations we want to avoid
How our minds rationalize excuses so that we can avoid uncomfortable things
“Fear is about predicting the future” and we are often poor predictors of our own futures
Specific tactics and strategies you can use to step outside of your comfort zone
How conviction can help you step outside your comfort zone and push you
Customizing and tweaking situations to make them slightly more bearable can help you take that first step
The danger of “catastrophizing” and always assuming the worst case scenario
The power of clarity and getting clear on the truth about what you want, and what the worst case scenarios are
How we can build resilience and make the pursuit of discomfort stick
The power of a learning orientation and growth mindset to give you the ability to step outside your comfort zone
Stepping outside your comfort zone starts in your mind
The power of desensitizing yourself to things outside your comfort zone, and what happens when you continue to have experiences outside your comfort zone
How to deliver bad news to people, fire someone, and have tough conversations
The dysfunctional conversations that might arise if you don’t know the right way to deliver bad news
The vital importance of mastering the art of small talk & strategies for mastering small talk
Why every meaningful relationship you’ve ever had (other than family) started with small talk
Focus first on building camaraderie and rapport, then trust
Listening, making connection, asking questions in an open ended way
Developing global dexterity and learning to act outside of your cultural comfort zone
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Aug 17 2017

52mins

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Why Aren’t You Asking? How To Get What You Want with Dr. Wayne Baker

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In this episode we unlock the POWER of ASKING. When you ask for what you need, miracles can happen, but so many of us are too afraid to really ask, or we feel like we don’t know how or what we should be asking for. How do you get better at ask? How can you tap the tremendous power and potential of the social capital within your network by using the power of asking? We answer these questions and much more with our guest Dr. Wayne Baker. How to unlock the incredible power and potential of your network and the social capital Dr. Wayne Baker is an American author and sociologist on the senior faculty of the University of Michigan Ross School of Business. He is best known for his research in economic sociology, and his survey research on values, where he documented Americans’ core values. He writes in both academic and popular media on this theme and is often invited to present his findings across the U.S. 

What’s the difference between “paying it back” versus “paying it forward” - what’s the difference?

What is a kidney chain? And what can it teach us about the importance of “paying it forward?"

What is a reciprocity ring and how can it change the way you interact with your social network?

What is social capital?

The network that we are involved in and all of the resources that the network contains. 

When you ask for what you need - miracles can happen

There is a wealth of opportunity at your fingertips - but you have to ASK for it!

What are the biggest reasons that people don’t ask for what they need? What stops you from asking for help on the most important things in your life?

Why is it so hard to ask for what we need?

How do we get better at asking?

What should you do if you aren’t clear about what you need? What should you do if you don’t know what to ask for?

Start with figuring out your goal. What’s your goal? What are you trying to achieve?

What resources do you need to achieve that goal? Money? Advice? Resources? 

Then you have to figure out WHO to ask

Then you have to MAKE the ask

The “two step” method for asking for anything you want. You may not directly know someone, but you probably know someone who knows someone.

The “quick start method” for figuring out WHAT YOU NEED and ASKING FOR IT

Visioning - developing a detailed, vivid, description of a positive future. Then you start to identify the goals that are in that vision, that back that into request. 

What is a SMART request?

People don’t know WHY you’re asking for something unless you EXPLAIN. 

Research is very clear - the more specific your request, the more likely people are to help. 

If you make a smart, well formulated request people are more likely to think you’re smart and competent. 

People are more willing to help than you think they are. 

Action item: Make a small request in a safe place. 

Action item: Use the reciprocity ring or other tools to create structured ways to interact and ask. H

ow to integrate the “Stand Up” into your routines and meetings to structure asking into the natural rhythms of your work and life. 

People are willing to help, they are willing to give, but you have to ASK - because people can’t read your mind

Life is about connection and asking is what jump starts the power of your connections. 

Be a giver-request - be very generous and freely help other people even if they’ve never helped you, or can never help you in the future. 

Freely give help and freely ask for what you need - this the most powerful mode of being.

Don’t be a lone wolf. Doing it all by yourself is a recipe for failure. 

Overly generous giving, without ever ASKING for what you need - leads to burnout. 

Homework: Apply the elements from the quick start method questions above to figure out what you need help with. 

Homework: Assess where you are on the spectrum of giving and asking.

Nov 14 2019

47mins

Play

Why You Shouldn’t Follow Your Passion & The Rare Value of Deep Work with Cal Newport

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In this episode we discuss why you should not follow your passion, the two biggest pitfalls people struggle with trying to build a career they love, the incredible importance of DEEP WORK, why deep work is so valuable and how we can cultivate it, as well as how you can structure your lifestyle to attain autonomy and mastery with Cal Newport.
  
 Cal is an Associate Professor of Computer Science at Georgetown University, He previously earned his Ph.D. from MIT in 2009. Cal has authored several bestselling books including “So Good They Can’t Ignore You” and “Deep Work” both of which have received deep praise from The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, The Economist, and many more. 
  
 If you’re looking for some guidance as you plan your new year, listen to this episode! 
  
 We discuss:
Why following your passion is bad adviceThe 2 fundamental flaws of the idea that you should follow your passionThere’s a huge difference between what makes you enjoy a hobby and what makes you enjoy a professionThe core components of having a happy professional lifeIf we don't follow our passions, how do we end up with a job we are passionate about?The simple, but not easy, path to having a passionate careerImportance of building up rare and valuable skills by pursuing an apprecenticeship phaseHow to cultivate skills to attain leverage to get the autonomy and mastery that will make your work meaningfulThe right question you should ask if you are unsatisfied with your jobThe 2 biggest pitfalls people run into trying to find and build a career they are passionate aboutWhy you need career capital and how to cultivate itThere are many many paths you can take that could lead to a passionate careerWe go deep on the concept of DEEP WORKWe discuss why deep work is increasingly both valuable and rareHow you can produce at an elite level while working fewer total hoursHow Deep Work is a meta skill that fuels other skills Attention residue and how it can crush your cognitive abilityWhy Deep work requires zero distraction. A single glance at an inbox or social media account can disrupt an entire deep work sessionThe importance of scheduling deep work far in advance on your calendarWhy everyone is an artist, and how that changes what work you should focus on The danger of focuses on “taxes and paint”Deep work is a SKILL not a HABIT and it gets better with practiceHow to stretch your ability to concreteLifestyle changes you can implement that create the foundation for deep focus and deep workHow to break the cycle of addiction to novel stimuli Why you should schedule all your deep work on your calendar ahead of timeExercises that you can implement right now to train your concentrationWhy Cal recommends that you should embrace boredomYour deep mental addiction to new stimulus and how you can break it
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Dec 29 2016

53mins

Play

Mental Fitness and Creating the Life You Want with Dr. Sasha Heinz

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Do you know what you should do but you don’t do it? In this episode, we dig into the science behind WHY this happens and HOW exactly you can overcome this massive obstacle. No one’s ever actually stuck, but the reason you FEEL stuck is that what you want, your goals, desires, change you want in your life, etc, are bumping up against an emotional roadblock or subconscious belief. It’s like having one foot on the gas while the other slams down the breaks. In this interview with Dr. Sasha Heinz, we share what you can do to finally overcome that fear and anxiety and transform your life. 
Dr. Sasha Heinz is a developmental psychologist and life coach, is an expert in positive psychology, lasting behavioral change, and the science of getting unstuck. She received her BA from Harvard, her Ph.D. in developmental psychology from Columbia, and her master’s in applied positive psychology from the University of Pennsylvania, where she also served as a faculty member.Education is good. Application is better. Transformation is best.Focus on mitigating mental disorders vs focusing on happiness and mental health“The neurotic paradox"Focusing your life around “optimal human functioning”If you aren’t doing something, you aren’t going to see different results. Do you ever know what you SHOULD do, and yet you don’t do it? “The biography of your beliefs” shapes how you think, perceive, and ultimately act in the world. Your emotional brain is much more powerful than your logical brainNo one’s ever actually stuck, but the reason you FEEL stuck is that what you want (your desire, change, etc) is bumping up against an emotional roadblock or subconscious belief (often from your childhood). Are you actively directing and engaging the direction and amplitude of change in your life?If you want to know WHY you’re not moving forward, pay attention to what you’re feelingYour thoughts are totally optional. You have the autonomy to decide what you want to believe about yourself.You have to work at both ends of the psychological spectrum simultaneously - healing wounds and trauma, and focusing on optimal human functioningDo a deep inventory of your current belief systems. What were you taught about yourself? What were you taught about your potential? What did you believe about your health, competence, intelligence, lovability, etc as a child? Conduct a “belief blueprint” of yourself. You have one foot on the gas, that’s your neocortex, and you have one foot on the brake, that’s your emotional cortex saying “that’s way too scary."Often a coach or a psychologist can help you uncover those beliefs and figure out what is making your emotional brain freak out?When you’re doing something you don’t want to do… pause and reflect.. and ask yourself “WHY AM I DOING THIS BEHAVIOR?"The action that comes out of negative emotion is very narrow.Sometimes personal development work is hysterical because the human brain is so irrational You can rationalize anything.. Rational Lies.Managing your mind is the currency of the next generation because our world today requires it to be successful. Become more fluent in your own emotions and experience them. Don’t resist your emotions, just allow them to happen, feel them, and observe them. They last about 90 seconds. Growth and development require uncomfortable emotions. Homework: Make a list of all the things you do to avoid feeling your feelings. Homework: Make a list of the things you do that seem completely bonkers and seem completely contradictory to your goals and desires.
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Aug 08 2019

51mins

Play

Influence Anyone With Secret Lessons Learned From The World’s Top Hostage Negotiators with Former FBI Negotiator Chris Voss

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In this episode we discuss the secret lessons hostage negotiators around the world use to win the day, how to understand and influence people’s emotional drivers, the two words that can transform any negotiation, the biggest hallmarks of powerful master negotiators and much more with the FBI’s former lead international kidnapping negotiator Chris Voss.
 
Chris Voss is the founder and CEO of the Black Swan Group, an adjunct professor at Georgetown and University of Southern California. During his 24 year term with the FBI where he most recently served as the FBI’s lead international kidnapping negotiator, Voss worked approximately 150 kidnappings worldwide, from the Middle East to Haiti including a number of high-profile kidnappings. Voss has been trained by the FBI, Scotland Yard and Harvard in the art of negotiation and negotiated with likes of terrorists, hostage takers, and bank robbers.
 We discuss:FBI’s behvaioral change stairway they use to negotiate with terrorists and hostage takersWhy emotional intelligence is at the forefront of business success todayHow to leverage “tactical empathy” in your life to achieve the results you wantHow to create leverage to influence anyone in the world by understanding their emotional driversWhy you should never be mean to someone who could hurt you by doing nothingWhy understanding is NOT the same as agreement and why that is importantThe biggest barrier to negotiation success is not complexity - its overcoming the awkwardnessHow repeating the last 1-3 words someone said can have a huge impactWhy winning in a negotiation is not the same as beating the other sideThe incredible importance of listening and how you can cultivate “active listening"The power and importance of open ended and clarifying questionsHow to draw out the hidden cards from the other side of a negotiationThe secrets hostage negotiators AROUND THE WORLD use regardless of cultural dynamicsThe two most important words in any negotiationThe three different types of negotiator and the strengths and weaknesses of eachHow changing one question totally transformed the kidnapping negotiation for Jose Escobar Why Chris would “never lie to anyone he’s not going to kill"Why Chris hates compromise in any negotiationThe “F Word” in negotiations and why you should be careful with itOne of the biggest hallmarks of powerful negotiators And much more! 
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Oct 20 2016

53mins

Play

How to Crush Fear, Overcome Anxiety, and Reprogram Your Life For Success with Justin Stenstrom

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In this episode we discuss the 8 step process for overcoming anxiety and conquering your fears, how to stop a panic attack in real time, how you can tap into your subconscious mind and reprogram it, how to get deeper sleep, the power of hypnosis, and much more with Justin Stenstrom.
  
 Justin is a nationally acclaimed life coach, author, entrepreneur, and speaker. He is the founder of EliteManMagazine.com, the host of the Elite Man Podcast. Justin’s work has been featured in the Huffington Post, Lifehacker, Maxim, and several other publications. 
 
 We discuss:How Justin overcame major depression, anxiety, and panic attacks to achieve his dreamsHow Justin went from 3-4 panic attacks per week, suicidal thoughts, to living a healthy and happy lifeWhy Justin views his struggle with depression and anxiety was a blessing in disguiseJustin’s 8 step process to overcome anxiety and conquer your fears:
#1 - Realize that you’re not going crazy and there are a lot of solutions
#2 - Do a combination of meditation, yoga, hypnosis
#3 - Live in the present, future focus builds up a lot of anxiety, living in the past creates depression
#4 Exercise 4-5x per week, backed by substantial research
#5 Improve your sleep
#6 Improve your diet
#7 Take the right supplements
#8 Use the 3 step technique to crush panic attacks
The incredible 3 step process for dealing with a panic attack right nowHow hypnosis can be an incredibly powerful intervention for dealing with anxiety and how you can hypnotize yourselfWhy hypnosis is so powerful, because it speaks directly to your subconscious mindHow to tap into your subconscious mind and reprogram itThe “trance” state between sleep and wakingPractical tips for cultivating a healthy and deep sleep environmentHow to condition your mind for deeper sleepWhy Cell phones and TV before bed are one of the worst things you can doHow to stop yourself from hitting the snooze buttonThe ideal temperature to sleepWhy having a midnight snack might be really good for youShould you wake up in the middle of the night and work?Dietary interventions to deal with depression“This is how you ride a roller coaster”The power of facing your fears head on and exposing them for what they are
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Feb 02 2017

47mins

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Break Your Phone Addiction (& Your Other Bad Habits) With Charles Duhigg

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In this episode we discuss habit loops, how they form, and what they are, we look at why you can’t stop picking up your phone (I know that’s definitely a challenge for me), the habits and routines that research shows are most correlated with success, how to bake mental models into your brain, and much more with Charles Duhigg.
  
 Charles is a Pulitzer Prize-winning columnist and senior editor at The New York Times. Charles is the author of “The Power of Habit,” which spent over two years on the New York Times best-seller list, and more recently “Smarter Faster Better,” also a New York Times best seller. Charles graduated from Yale University, Harvard Business School and has been featured in This American Life, N.P.R, Frontline, and much more.
  
 We discuss:
  
Habit Loops, what they are and how they form
40-45% of what we do every single day is not a decision it's a habit
Emotional cue for checking your phone and "novelty seeking"
How your brain makes that behavior automatic because it's delivering a reward
How to break habits
What Reward are you seeking? Get as specific as possible
Figure out the REWARD, then reprogram the HABIT
Keystone habits and how they can transform your identity and create a chain reaction
Why it's that the most successful people work harder, they just think differently
The rituals and habits of people who are more productive
Why its not being smarter, its not working harder, its not going to the right schools - the research shows that what correlates the MOST with success is that the people who are most successful tend to have “contemplative routines”, habits in their lives that push them to think more deeply
Journaling is a great example of a contemplative routine that can make you be more productive
Being busy and being productive are not synonymous
Thinking has always been the killer "productivity app"
The story of Quantas Flight 32
Maintaining focus while in the middle of a crashing airplane and how to cultivate situational awareness
How Firefighters develop ESP
Building a story, a mental model of a situation, and how that can shape your situational awareness
The vital importance of building mental models
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Sep 14 2017

28mins

Play

Five Things You Never Knew About Building Real Self Esteem with Dr. David Lieberman

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In this episode we discuss how to build self control and self esteem. We look at what happens when you lose control - and how to develop the strategies so that you can feel calm and collected in tough situations. We discuss the importance of having an “allegiance to reality,” share concrete strategies for building self esteem, discuss the relationship between pain and fulfillment - and discuss how you can never get angry again with our guest Dr. David Lieberman.
Dr. David Lieberman is a New York Times bestselling author and expert in the fields of human behavior and interpersonal relationships. His most recent work Never Get Angry Again dives into the science behind our emotions and how we can stay calm in any situation. His work has been featured on ABC, The Today Show, NPR, Entrepreneur and more.Why do people get angry? What’s at the root of anger?At the core of anger is a feeling of vulnerabilityWhen we become angry the brain releases a number of neurotransmitters and hormones - and it gives us the illusion of feeling in controlAs our self esteem erodes, we like ourselves less, we get angrierThe degree that we don’t like ourselves, the more we need other people to validate us, engaging the egoWhen someone is angry - it's about them, its not about youThe core of anger is fear and a fear of losing control Anger creates the illusion of controlPeople with low self esteem are often the most controlling people - because they need to be able to influence things around them, because they feel like they don’t have control of themselvesSelf control is at the CORE of self esteem. If you can control your own behavior, you begin to build self esteem.How do you build self esteem?Recognize that you’re in pain. Acknowledge and accept that. Allegiance to reality at all costs. Don’t pretend that it doesn’t exist. Self compassion, not self pity. Don’t beat yourself up more. With self love, you begin to grow out of pain. Reconnect with who you are. What are you living for?Living being driven by the ego - causes pain and sufferingSlow simple progress, moving step by step out of darkness will begin to fuel self esteem The entire trajectory of our lives can be shaped by our egoFocusing on achieving to win the praise and approval of other peopleQuestions to break through the ego and understand what really matters to you:What would I do if I had all the money I needed?What would I do if I felt that I couldn't fail?What would I do if I was unconditionally loved?Neurotics build castles in the sky, psychotics live in them, and psychiatrists charge rentThe beginning of mental health is when you face yourself. Ask yourself: Where have I been trying to ignore a reality?By ignoring a problem, you end up compounding it and feeling worse and worse about yourself. "Blame mode" conflicts with "solution mode". We live in culture that fosters the idea of not accepting responsibility and blaming other peopleThe way to gain self esteem is to ACCEPT RESPONSIBILITY “The lottery curse” - what is it?Money, intelligence, life experience have no bearing on happiness - just the QUALITY OF OUR CHOICESThe power of decision is the power to change your life.Painful experiences ultimately help create meaning in our livesJill Bolte Taylor "90 Second Rule"
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May 17 2018

55mins

Play

Effortlessly Remember Anything – Lessons From A Grandmaster of Memory with Kevin Horsley

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In this episode we learn the memory tactics and strategies of an International Grandmaster of Memory, we look at why there is no such thing as a bad memory or a good memory - only bad memory strategies and good memory strategies, in real time we build a memory palace that you can use to memorize and effortlessly recall the ten emotions of power, go deep into the system for organizing and remembering huge chunks of information and much more with our guest Kevin Horsley. 
  
 Kevin Horsley is an International Grandmaster of Memory, and was one of the first five people in the world to obtain this title. Kevin is also the World Record Holder for the matrix memorization of 10,000 digits of Pi. He is also the bestselling author of several books on memory and his work has been featured in Oprah Magazine, Times, Forbes, Inc. and many more.
How Kevin went from severe dyslexia, almost being diagnosed with brain damage, to becoming a world record holder in memory 
You can never be more than your definition of yourself, you have to question your labels as they aren’t often the absolute truth
There is no such thing as a good memory or a bad memory - there are only good memory strategies or bad memory strategies
Auditory memory is always sequential - improving your spacial/visual memory allows you to move seamlessly through information 
The best way to get your brain engaged is to imagine content and connect it to something you know 
There are 3 keys to developing a super memory
A place
A unique image
Glue them together
“PUG” 
Place (long-term memory)
Unique Image
Glue
We build a memory palace on your body to memorize the 10 emotions of power from Tony Robbins
Long-term memory + short-term memory = medium-term memory
Using google maps and tourist attractions to remember anything by exploring and planting memories anywhere on earth
 There’s no real limit to what you can do with your mind - the only real limit is time 
“The more you know, the easier it is to know more”
We have a phenomenal brain and aren’t using all of its potential 
Do you need to know something for Just in Time or Just In Case?
The power and importance of periodic review to encode information for the long-term
Just in case information - using a system of Evernote + Todoist to store and review information
Book strategy: 
Get the book - first do an overview of the book, look at the table of contents, make predictions what is the book about, what do you know about (active knowledge networks), once he’s overviewed the book, he does a preview of the book - what specifically do you want to know from this book?
Lay the book contents out on a memory journey with the key principles ideas - what is the key content - put it on a journey 
Put a little note - you put a specific information
You need to work on these ideas and get the key fundamentals - it’s like driving. You have to train yourself and improve and grow. 
Kevin spends 1 hour a day on new content, 1 hour a day on review. Discipline is a key to this
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Apr 12 2018

55mins

Play

How To Break Free From Depression & Anxiety By Changing Your Brain Chemistry with Neuroscientist Dr. Alex Korb

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In this episode we discuss how you can battle depression and anxiety and break out of a vicious downward spiral by literally changing the chemistry of your brain using very simple and straightforward tactics that you can start applying right now. 
If you've struggled with depression or anxiety, or you want to understand how we can reshape our brains with our actions, listen to this episode immediately!
 
Dr. Alex Korb is a neuroscientist at UCLA, is the author of The Upward Spiral: Using Neuroscience to Reverse the Course of Depression, One Small Change at a Time, and author of the Prefrontal Nudity blog on Psychology Today.
 
Alex and I discuss:
 -How people get stuck in a loop of anxiety or depression
 -How to strengthen and grow new neurons to literally change the structure of your brain
 -Why nothing is wrong with your brain when you get stuck in a loop of depression or anxiety
 -How the same action can have an entirely different impact on your brain at a different time
 -How your own choices and actions change your brain in real time
 -The difference between depression and anxiety
 -How 10 mins of exercise can dramatically change your brain chemistry (and the study that shows it)
 -How your actions can determine your perception and shape your reality
 -The Neuroscience behind “The Secret” and why it really works
 -And much more!
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Jun 23 2016

58mins

Play

Achieving What You Think Is Impossible - Walking The Walk with Alex Banayan

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Do you want to figure out why you’re not walking the talk? In this episode we uncover the truth about what really holds people back - and share the the secret strategy that all successful people use to achieve incredible things. We examine the world’s most successful people and figure out exactly what commonalities they share, and how you can use them in your own life. All of this and much more in our interview with returning guest Alex Banayan. 

Dec 12 2019

56mins

Play

From Waiting Tables to Owning a Major League Team - The Epic Journey of Marcus Whitney

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In this episode, we share how a college dropout went from waiting tables to becoming the owner of a Major League Soccer Team and the most powerful VC in the healthcare industry. We uncover the incredible strategy that can be used to break into ANY industry and become a dominant player sharing the stage with top CEOs, even without any connections or relationships. We share why you don’t have to be an expert to leverage the credibility of others, the power of public speaking, what it means to orchestrate a deal and much more with our guest Marcus Whitney. 

Dec 10 2019

52mins

Play

Life’s Great Question - How To Find Meaning In Your Work & Life with Tom Rath

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In this episode, we ask the big question - how do you find meaning in your life and work? When you’re starting death in the face, life’s purpose becomes clear. We learn how to harness those lessons to find meaning in your own life and discover a few simple things you can do every day - starting right now - to increase your odds of living a longer, healthier, happier life with our guest Tom Rath. 

Dec 05 2019

52mins

Play

Thanksgiving Special 2019

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In this episode, we take a look back at some of our past guest's most valuable insights on gratitude! Enjoy the mashup!

Nov 28 2019

44mins

Play

Grant Cardone: Why Most People Aren’t Willing To Succeed

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Grant Cardone is the CEO of Cardone Capital, an international speaker, entrepreneur and author of The 10X Rule as well as two dozen best-selling business programs. Named the #1 marketer to watch by Forbes Magazine, Cardone founded The 10X Movement & The 10X Growth Conference, which has grown into the world’s largest business & entrepreneur conference. He has been featured on countless media outlets across the globe.

Nov 26 2019

49mins

Play

Would You Bet Your House On The Turn of A Card? High Stakes Lessons with Alec Torelli

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Alec Torelli is an entrepreneur, motivational speaker, and professional poker player. As a poker player, Alec has won millions playing live cash games and some of the biggest tournaments live and online. As a coach and digital entrepreneur, he shares his knowledge and insight to help others achieve their life goals. Alec has been featured on ESPN, CBS Sports, Travel Channel, Fox Sports, Poker News and many more.

Nov 21 2019

53mins

Play

Why Aren’t You Asking? How To Get What You Want with Dr. Wayne Baker

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In this episode we unlock the POWER of ASKING. When you ask for what you need, miracles can happen, but so many of us are too afraid to really ask, or we feel like we don’t know how or what we should be asking for. How do you get better at ask? How can you tap the tremendous power and potential of the social capital within your network by using the power of asking? We answer these questions and much more with our guest Dr. Wayne Baker. How to unlock the incredible power and potential of your network and the social capital Dr. Wayne Baker is an American author and sociologist on the senior faculty of the University of Michigan Ross School of Business. He is best known for his research in economic sociology, and his survey research on values, where he documented Americans’ core values. He writes in both academic and popular media on this theme and is often invited to present his findings across the U.S. 

What’s the difference between “paying it back” versus “paying it forward” - what’s the difference?

What is a kidney chain? And what can it teach us about the importance of “paying it forward?"

What is a reciprocity ring and how can it change the way you interact with your social network?

What is social capital?

The network that we are involved in and all of the resources that the network contains. 

When you ask for what you need - miracles can happen

There is a wealth of opportunity at your fingertips - but you have to ASK for it!

What are the biggest reasons that people don’t ask for what they need? What stops you from asking for help on the most important things in your life?

Why is it so hard to ask for what we need?

How do we get better at asking?

What should you do if you aren’t clear about what you need? What should you do if you don’t know what to ask for?

Start with figuring out your goal. What’s your goal? What are you trying to achieve?

What resources do you need to achieve that goal? Money? Advice? Resources? 

Then you have to figure out WHO to ask

Then you have to MAKE the ask

The “two step” method for asking for anything you want. You may not directly know someone, but you probably know someone who knows someone.

The “quick start method” for figuring out WHAT YOU NEED and ASKING FOR IT

Visioning - developing a detailed, vivid, description of a positive future. Then you start to identify the goals that are in that vision, that back that into request. 

What is a SMART request?

People don’t know WHY you’re asking for something unless you EXPLAIN. 

Research is very clear - the more specific your request, the more likely people are to help. 

If you make a smart, well formulated request people are more likely to think you’re smart and competent. 

People are more willing to help than you think they are. 

Action item: Make a small request in a safe place. 

Action item: Use the reciprocity ring or other tools to create structured ways to interact and ask. H

ow to integrate the “Stand Up” into your routines and meetings to structure asking into the natural rhythms of your work and life. 

People are willing to help, they are willing to give, but you have to ASK - because people can’t read your mind

Life is about connection and asking is what jump starts the power of your connections. 

Be a giver-request - be very generous and freely help other people even if they’ve never helped you, or can never help you in the future. 

Freely give help and freely ask for what you need - this the most powerful mode of being.

Don’t be a lone wolf. Doing it all by yourself is a recipe for failure. 

Overly generous giving, without ever ASKING for what you need - leads to burnout. 

Homework: Apply the elements from the quick start method questions above to figure out what you need help with. 

Homework: Assess where you are on the spectrum of giving and asking.

Nov 14 2019

47mins

Play

Jay Abraham: Growing A Business With No Money Or Customers

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In this interview we show you how to grow a business with no capital, no product and no service. You will discover how to train yourself to spot outrageous business opportunities surrounding you in everyday life and we give you the strategies for building trust with your ideal clients and business partners. We ask what does it take to become GREAT? In your career, job, business, partnering, relationships we look at exactly how you can achieve greatness in the key areas of your life. All of this and much more with our guest the legendary Jay Abraham. Jay Abraham is founder and CEO of The Abraham Group, Inc., and is recognized as one of the world’s most successful marketing strategists, business innovators, entrepreneurial advisors, and masters of revenue acceleration. He has spent the last 30+ years solving problems and significantly increasing the bottom lines of over 10,000 clients in more than 400 industries worldwide.

How do you grow a company with no capital, product, or service?

What does it mean to mine, monetize and maximize relational capital?

Whatever your resource impediment or impairment is, someone else has that and you just have to figure out how to ethically leverage it

How Jay created 1.5mm in less than 6 months by finding arbitrage between products, services, and audiences 

Find “strategic investors” - who else benefits from your growth? Complementary or related products, companies that benefit and naturally grow when you grow - and demonstrate to them that your growth is beneficial for them too - and then get them to help you. 

How do you build trust in a business relationship? How do you get someone to introduce you to all of their clients?

Before you expend a ton of capital and time on a project - try to get some validation. The only validation that counts is dollars spent, not what a focus group thinks.

How to easily validate your business ideas without taking risk on the front end. 

There’s a huge amount of IP that’s available to license from places like the Navy, the government, etc Find “parallel universes” that aren’t competitive and plug those opportunities in. 

Never put anything at risk until you’ve de-risked and validated your product, service, or business model 

What happens when a typical business is STUCK? Figure out what you’re stuck with. 

How can you unlock an “unlimited business checkbook” to fund ANY problem within your business?

How someone got paid $1mm and a free Porsche to buy a Porsche dealership with creative deal making Spend time traveling outside whatever you do and whatever you’re interested in.

Study other businesses, study how other products and services market, how they sell, study topics that are outside your domain of knowledge. 

How to train yourself to spot outrageous business opportunities lying around you in everyday life.

How you can make the “money connection” - you don’t need to be brilliant, but you have to have the right “sensors” turned on - and they only turn on when you broaden your understanding of what’s possible

What is Greatness? And why do so many people fall short of it?

Everyone has the ability to be great - and everyone wants to be great.

98% of people are mediocre - yet they want to be great - WHY?

What does it take to become GREAT? In your career, job, business, partnering, relationships - how you can achieve greatness in the key areas of your life. 

There are 4 keys to achieving greatness With every improvement in greatness there is an exponential increase in quality and outcome - not a linear increase. 

Most breakthroughs don’t come from WITHIN an industry - they come from OUTSIDE it. 

Homework: Be curious, ask people questions, dig into how other businesses and industries do business.

Nov 12 2019

57mins

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Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi - The Greatest Unanswered Question in Psychology Today

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In this episode we have one of the absolute living legends of psychology on the show - we discuss the GREATEST unanswered question in psychology, the biggest thing people mis-understand about flow, what advice young people can take away from our guest's incredible career, and what he thinks the absolute biggest takeaways from his own research are - and much more with Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. Your fate, your destiny, your future is not set out for you - you can shape it to be what you want it to be. You have the freedom to make life better for yourself and more worthwhile and meaningful for yourselves. Even the greatest traumas and struggles can be overcome. You don’t have to achieve fame and fortune to live a meaningful and wonderful life and to be truly alive.  Mihaly is Claremont Graduate University’s Distinguished Professor of Psychology and Management. He is a bestselling author and founder and co-director of the Quality of Life Research Center. He is a member of the American Academy of Education, the American Academy of Arts and Sciences, and the National Academy of Leisure Studies and his work has been featured on NPR,TED, WIRED, and more!!

The key ideas supported by the data around how people respond to Trauma.

People who are focused beyond themselves and their own wellbeing are more resilient to the things that happen to them. 

When you focus on the wellbeing of others, society, your family, etc - you’re much more resilient to Trauma

How do you think of yourself? Do you think of yourself as the body in which you live? Do you see yourself as being part of a family, group, religion etc? This will shape your response to trauma. 

The self is a very poor site for meaning - don’t put all your eggs in the fragile basket of the self 

We are all connected - recognizing that helps contextualize our existence

Flow and happiness are not the same thing - but they are very related

Flow is a momentary state of experience and happiness is a general perspective towards life 

If your life is full of flow - it will be a happy life! 

How do we consistently create flow states in our lives?

If you have those 2 traits you are more likely to be in flow more often 

Pay attention to the world around you and connect with it one way or another 

Life is quite malleable - we often feel like we’ve been dealt a tough hand, but its often how we react to it that is the most important 

How does Mihaly think about creating flow states in his own life?

What is the greatest unanswered question in psychology today?

What is the biggest mistake or pitfall that younger people (in their mid 20s) can make?

You have to keep an open mind, be open to learning

Don’t be too instinctive, don’t become an ideologue too soon

What’s the biggest thing that people misunderstand about Flow and Mihay’s research? 

We have the opportunity to shape ourselves into whoever we want to be- but we have to take into account where we came from and what our experiences have been. 

What’s the biggest takeaway from all the research on Flow?

Your fate, your destiny, your future is not set out for you - you can shape it to be what you want it to be.

You have the freedom to make life better for yourself and more worthwhile and meaningful for yourselves. Even the greatest traumas and struggles can be overcome.

You don’t have to achieve fame and fortune to live a meaningful and wonderful life and to be truly alive. 

It may not be an easy road to get there, but it’s possible for anyone to get there. This is open to everyone, but it’s hard to do the work and get there.

Life can be much more fun than you think! We have to look past the limited perspective of our own egos and experiences to understand the beauty of life.

Nov 07 2019

39mins

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The Truth About Fear & Why You’ve Got It All Wrong with Akshay Nanavati

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In this episode, we show you how to turn your fear into health, wealth, and happiness. If you want something you’ve never had before, you have to do something you’ve never done before. That means suffering and taking risks. Building a positive relationship with suffering is one of the most important life skills you can master. Suffering is the true training ground of self-transcendence. With our guest Akshay Nanavati we show you how to choose your struggle and build meaningful suffering into your life. Akshay Nanavati is a Marine Corps Veteran, speaker, adventurer, entrepreneur and author of "Fearvana: The Revolutionary Science of How to Turn Fear into Health, Wealth and Happiness." He is also the founder of the nonprofit, the Fearvana Foundation. His work has been featured in Forbes, Psychology Today, entrepreneur.com, CNN, Huffington Post, Military Times, FOX 5 NY, ABC, NBC and other media outlets around the globe. 

From drug addiction to marine corps Bootcamp - to hunting for bombs in Iraq - how Akshay learned to deal with fear 

The toughest battle Akshay had to fight was coming home - dealing with PTSD and suicidal thoughts 

We live in a world that demonizes stress, anxiety, fear, pain and suffering - and yet in the psychology and neuroscience research shows us that our emotions are normal and inevitable

We don’t live in a world of life-threatening risks anymore, and so our brain creates these risks

No emotions are good or bad - we assign and create the meaning via our beliefs Humans are meaning-making machines - we naturally create meaning out of everything

What you are labeling yourself can powerfully shape your experiences.

Typical behaviors like “depression” “PTSD” etc are just brain patterns, and they can be re-written using “Top-Down Neuroplasticity”

Don’t wait for the fear to go away, act despite the fear.. or once you learn to train yourself.. BECAUSE of the fear 

Building a positive relationship to suffering is the single most important skill to master.

 “Hebbs Law” - neurons that fire together, wire together

There is a war in your brain for neuronal real estate - use it or lose it. 

Should you try to SEEK Suffering instead of AVOID suffering?

"There is no coming to consciousness without pain. People will do anything, no matter how absurd, in order to avoid facing their own Soul. One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.” - Dr. Carl Jung

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” - Dr. Carl Jung V

isualize yourself in the process of going through the struggle, the suffering, the tough part of your goals - not the easy parts at the end. 

There is tremendous beauty in pushing through and into your fears.

 Everything worthwhile is hard, and you have to train yourself to fall in love with suffering. Fall in love with the process. Y

ou cannot get better at something without doing it. 

Exercise is a “miracle grow for your brain.”

If you could put all the benefits of exercise into a pill, it would be the best selling pill of all time. 

If you want something you’ve never had before, you have to do something you’ve never done before. That means suffering and taking a risk. If you don’t proactively search out a proactive worthy challenge - something to struggle and suffer for in your life - then suffering will find you anyway. 

Don’t follow your passion, find your "worthy struggle." 

You don’t discover a passion you develop a passion. You have to put yourself in uncomfortable situations to develop your passion. You only evolve when you suffer.

That’s why lottery winners typically lose their winnings. When you struggle for it, you become a different person.

Homework: Find one little thing to test yourself. Do a little thing to push yourself outside your comfort zone. Don’t just do it, come back and reflect on it. Journal about it.

Oct 31 2019

48mins

Play

How You Can Build Your Audience From Nothing with Joe Fier

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In this episode, we discuss how to get started building your network and traffic online. We learn exactly how to build an audience from scratch, insider lessons about the best content marketing approach, how to get your content to go viral, a mind-blowing facebook advertising strategy and why email is still one of the most important marketing channels with our guest Joe Fier. Joe Fier advises businesses on marketing strategy and sales conversion to increase revenues. He consults and creates long-term selling assets for clients, which has generated over $50 million in revenue online. He runs a marketing and tech consulting company and full-scale content marketing agency. He and his Co-Founder at Evergreen Profits, Matt Wolfe are also the hosts of the Hustle and Flowchart Podcast and authors of The Evergreen Traffic Playbook, hosts of the Hustle and Flowchart Podcast and Evergreen Wisdom: Daily Habits & Thoughts To Optimize Your Business & Life.

Producing the best possible content was one of the inflection points for Evergreen Profits

Content Creation & Development is the cornerstone of their growth strategy 

“It starts with content - that’s the inflection point"

Attracting the right people to your content hasn’t changed a lot in the last 10 years in the online world. 

When Joe kickstarted his podcast, he went to his network and got it front of them

How do you build up a network or seed your initial traffic?

Places like Reddit, Facebook groups, Quora - get involved in a community, get involved in a bucket of an audience, interject or inject value with the content that you produce - and be consistent. You have to be consistently involved in the community. 

You have to build your own “credibility” in the community before you post your own content 

Go into the community and spend a few weeks JUST answering questions

Just keep adding a ton of value and get the other people to start self-promoting for you 

Get to know the OWNER of the subreddit or the MODERATOR of the subreddit (same strategy Sol used) that’s the KEY

Spend a minimal budget to kickstart a piece of content Reddit Ads Quora Ads Facebook Ads Google Ads

The target goal of the ads = join our email list Email Opt-Ins for a new audience

Run these $1/day ads targeting Brene Brown on FB and point them straight to the show notes page

There’s no commitment on their part, and you’re selling them on the podcast Retargeting Warm approach “Exclusive notes on this Brene Brown interview - click here to get them absolutely free"

Driven by FB retargeting after they’ve already visited your page Start low and work your way up as you see it working / frequency getting higher 

They will have a pool of 10 potential ads and they will assign a budget to the pool, and FB will pull the various ads - let FB’s algorithm do the work for you 

Repurpose episodes into something more visual for FB / Instagram / Ads

They try to do the opposite of the “Launch” model 

Have a longer-term mindset and know that the content you’re putting out in the world will live there for a long long time

Create amazing valuable content that will pass the test of time

Always try to follow up, the money is made on the follow-up

Don’t try to rush the sale, don’t be too pushy, lead with value 

Homework: Start an email list and create a good opt-in freebie + pair it up with a checklist or short opt-in guide Then set up retargeting + simple FB ad strategy to bring people back to what you’re doing.

Oct 29 2019

52mins

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Where Science & Spirituality Meet: Does The Law of Attraction Work? with Dr. Tara Swart

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Have you always wondered if the “Law of Attraction” is real? In this episode we dig into the science behind visualization, manifesting and much more to find out what really works and what doesn’t. We share strategies for access your intuition and aligning your emotions, your intuition and your rational thought process to supercharge your brain, show you how to beat imposter syndrome, and much more with our guest Dr. Tara Swart. Dr. Tara Swart is a neuroscientist and former psychiatric doctor. She is a senior lecturer at MIT Sloan and visiting senior lecturer at Kings College London, and an executive advisor to some of the world's most respected leaders in media and business. In 2016 she was named the world's first Neuroscientist-in-Residence at Corinthia Hotel, London. She is the author of the award-winning Neuroscience for Leadership, co-author of An Attitude for Acting, and lead author of her soon to be released third book, The Source.

Can we merge science and spirituality?

Is there science that actually explains the “law of attraction?"

Because of the way that you think you attract certain things into your life. 

The concept of abundant thinking 

The mental model “loss aversion” and why losses are more painful than gains 

Mastering your emotions, cultivating intuition, they are all very similar to learning a new language 

Replace any negative thought with a positive thought immediately - an ancient Buddhist lesson that is supported by the neuroscience of neuroplasticity

What should you do if you can’t dislodge a negative thought from your brain?

If you have a repetitive negative thought or a theme to a negative narrative in your brain - distill it down to the basic underlying belief that drives that negative thought - create an opposite state and use that as your positive affirmation or mantra (check out limiting belief episodes for more)

Use laughter and oxytocin to powerfully encode or recode beliefs 

How do you deal with imposter syndrome? Strategies for overcoming imposter syndrome Does visualization work?

Visualization makes things more certain for the brain. 

How creating a vision board can powerfully improve your brain’s focus on your goals

Value tagging and selective attention - by visualizing your future you start to prime the brain to focus on the things that you want to be important. 

“The Tetris Effect” - Do your visualization board as the last thing you do before you go to bed to prime and feed information into your subconscious. 

The period of time that you’re about to fall asleep is the period where your subconscious can be the MOST influenced. Visualization is an umbrella that three big things fall under

Neuroplasticity is the ability to change your brain. What you think and how you live can actually change physical things in your body.

Journaling is the “single best way” to access your intuition and align your emotions, your intuition and your rational thought process.

You can avoid repeating the same mistakes if you start to tap into and access your intuition

There’s a large neuronal connection between the gut neurons and the limbic system If you take a high-quality probiotic it can reduce negative thinking in your life

There’s a deep connection between your gut and your brain 

Probiotics, prebiotics, and fermented foods can improve your brain, your happiness, and your performance 

Meta-cognition - thinking about your thinking. Stepping back and asking yourself if your thought processes are healthy and helpful.

An awesome exercise you can use to improve your meta-cognition and reframe your thinking

Homework: Create an action board. The structure of the board is important. Don’t use words - that go down the logical/rational pathway.

Oct 24 2019

56mins

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Robert Greene: Do You Think You’re In Control? Think Again.

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How did one of the greatest geniuses of all time lose his life savings overnight? Despite our illusions of rationality, even the most brilliant humans are not rational at all. We tell ourselves that it’s always the other person who is irrational, envious, and aggressive, and that it’s never us. But science shows that all of our brains are remarkably similar, sculpted by evolution to have baked in biases and bad habits. No one is exempted from the laws of human nature. In this episode we explore the path that all the world’s greatest strategists have used to master their own irrationality and achieve mastery with our legendary guest Robert Greene. Robert Greene is an author known for his books on strategy, power, and seduction. He has written six international bestsellers: The 48 Laws of Power, The Art of Seduction, The 33 Strategies of War, The 50th Law, Mastery, and The Laws of Human Nature. In addition to having a strong following within the business world and a deep following in Washington, DC, Greene’s books are hailed by everyone from war historians to the biggest musicians in the industry (including Jay-Z, Drake, and 50 Cent).

How one of the greatest geniuses of all time lost his life savings overnight. Could it happen to you?

Despite our illusions of rationality, humans are not rational at all - we are governed by our emotions.

To be rational requires deep work and training. 

Many forces from evolution that are wired into our brains used to be adaptive, now they can be dangerous and even counter productive 

These primitive elemental forces form the cornerstones of human nature

Are the emotions that you’re feeling actually from your life? Did they come from you or did they come from other people?

We need to be independent, we need to think for ourselves, we need to gain control of our emotional responses. 

You can’t begin to be a rational strategist in life until you are aware of your own emotions It begins with humility. Turn your internal self absorption around. 

Rationality is being aware of your irrationality. Being aware of the emotions that govern your decisions. Step back.

Cultivating the ability to step away, to pull out of tunnel vision, to see a bigger picture, is a cornerstone of rational thinking and strategic thinking. 

The brain operates by simplifying information - we often don’t have access to the SOURCE of our feelings and emotions.

You need other people to do anything in life. Investing in the skill of influencing them is one of the most powerful things you can invest in. 

How LBJ was a master influencer and could melt away anyone’s defensiveness

Respond to people as they ARE not as you want them to be

Your natural tendency as you get older is for your mind to close up. 

Open, curious, having a mindset of discovery and openness is much more powerful than a deeply convicted rigid mindset. Having a rigid perspective is destroying your mind. 

A creative mind is incredibly flexible. That’s the quality of any truly great artist, entrepreneur, or political figure. It’s the path that ALL of the great strategists in life have followed.

Do you want power, creativity, success, and influence? OPEN UP YOUR MIND. 

Homework: Use a journal or simply do a thought experiment in your own head - in the course of a day you will feel many different emotions - dig into those emotions and understand what is going on with yourself and your own emotions. Try to find one moment, one emotion, and think about the root cause, think about where that emotion comes from. Where does it REALLY come from? Question. Dig. Think before your act. Try to come up with one little nugget about yourself and why you feel that way and analyze it instead of giving into it.

Oct 17 2019

57mins

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Roland Frasier: How To Build Lasting Wealth, Influence, and Happiness

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In this episode we discuss how to make the most important decisions in your life. Where should you spend your time? How do you evaluate different opportunities? Are you focused on creating wealth or income, and which is more important for you? Should you make a big change in your career or industry? We dig into all of these important questions and give you the tools to answer them with our guest the legendary Roland Frasier. Roland Frasier is a serial entrepreneur who has founded, scaled or sold dozens of different businesses.  He is currently CEO of the War Room Mastermind, where he advises over 150 major companies and principal in DigitalMarketer.com, among several other successful online companies. Roland has experienced business success in several industries including real estate, law, publishing, consulting, and many others. He has worked with major companies such as Microsoft, Infusionsoft, Etihad Airlines, Harper-Collins Publishing and Uber.The biggest business breakthroughs often come from applying unexpected places and cross applications The importance of creating models and frameworks for solving business problemsTake what you read and break it down into something that’s simple and useable How do you take what you’re reading and learning and turn it into something that is actually usable and applicable?The Long and The ShortThe dangers of being “cash poor” and “asset rich”Are you over-focused on income or wealth? Are you a dancing bear? Its so easy to get trapped into reinvesting 100% of your profits into growing your company How do you balance our time between short term income creation and long term wealth creation? Formula: Income Needs = Long Term Growth Desires + Lifestyle Costs + Cushion If you want yourself too far on one side or the other, it’s time to rebalance your focus a bitLife is so fragile - you have to balance living for today and living for tomorrowClassify your opportunities as either “wealth” opportunities or “income opportunities”You should be hustling, but you shouldn’t be hustling all the time.You have to stop and think.You have to stop and recover too.If you study some seriously successful and ultra driven people - they often achieve that success at the cost of their own personal and family lives If you want to really innovate, you have to take time to think.The world will demand 400% of your time. You have to limit the number of opportunities you take on. It’s easy to drown in opportunity. Once in a lifetime opportunities come around 3 or 4 times per year. PFM + Will it move the needle in terms of what you want to accomplish personally and financially? PeopleFunMoneySaying “not now” is not the same thing as saying no - it’s a great way to defer opportunitiesThe power and importance of asking for things Be inquisitive and child like in asking the things you are curious aboutThe “No harm in asking” RuleIn a business deal, if you don’t ask for what you want, it sure as well won’t be handed to you. The power of “inception” via the principle of Socratic Influencing - how you can get people to think that your ideas are theirs Lead people logically to the conclusion that you want them to arrive atThe absolutely magical power Should you “grow where you are planted?"The power and importance of developing your personal brand to help your business Homework: Determine what are you going to spend your time on? IDEA: Create a “Life Priority Matrix” 
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Oct 15 2019

53mins

Play

The Surprisingly Simple Skill Behind Extraordinary Relationships with Michael S. Sorenson

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In this episode we discuss crazy research that can predict 94% of the time whether or not your relationship will be successful. We reveal why you should NEVER give someone unsolicited advice. We share the communication “Swiss army knife” that you can use to build rapport, influence anyone, and deepen the most important relationships in your life and much more with our guest Michael S. Sorenson. Michael S. Sorensen is an award-winning author, marketing executive, relationship coach, researcher, and personal development junkie. He is the author of the best-selling I Hear You: The Surprisingly Simple Skill Behind Extraordinary Relationships and the 3-Minute Morning Journal.Listen, seek to understand, and then validatePeople question if we understand how they are feelingReflective listening vs validationCrazy research that can predict 94% of the time whether or not your relationship will be successful.The 3 primary ways of respondingHappily married couples validate each other more than 87% of the time. Divorced couples validated each other only 33% of the time.The biggest takeaway from this interview - don’t give unsolicited advice! When you give people advice they get defensive, and then both parties get frustrated pretty quickly. In today’s societies we have serious difficultly processing and understanding our emotions. Most of the time what people want is NOT advice, they want help processing the difficult emotions that they are experiencing. Reframe: Ask yourself “So, what are you gonna do about it?"When you jump in and give advice, you miss out on an opportunity to show them respect and an opportunity for them to grow. Validation can help when someone is experiencing both negative and positive emotions. Validation is a tremendously powerful negotiation tool. When people feel heard and understood they are more likely to listen to you and understand you. Validation helps you break down defensiveness.What is validation?Invalidating responsesTo be an effective communicator you have to communicate to people the way they ARE, not the way you want them to be. We often invalidate OURSELVES too - saying “it’s fine” or “I shouldn’t feel this way”You can’t repress an emotion and get away with it - they come back stronger and stronger. Repressed emotions are the root of many negative behaviors. We repress ourselves both ways - positively and negatively. When we experience positive things we should validate ourselves.Why you should accept compliments instead of deflecting them. How do you validate and justify an emotion that you don’t agree with? Lessons from dealing with someone who has schizophrenia - and how you can validate emotions that you “disagree with” Justifying emotions - “it makes sense, given what you think, that you feel that way” 4 Steps of ValidationDo you ever feel like someone isn’t listening to you? Maybe you need to flip the script and ask if you’ve really been listening to THEM.“Given what you’ve said, I completely understand why you would feel that way."A lot of emotional problems are a result of parents or people close in our lives who invalidated our negative experiences. Dealing with your emotions is HARD. Your emotions are unruly. Imagine how scary your emotions are as an adult, children don’t have the tools to deal with their emotions.Homework: the next tough conversation you have, don’t give them your advice. 
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Oct 10 2019

47mins

Play

How To Listen: The Most Underrated Leadership Hack In the 21st Century with Oscar Trimboli

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Are you feeling too distracted to pay attention? Does listening make your brain hurt? In a world full of noise and distraction - listening is the biggest leadership hack in today’s world. In this episode we crack the code on how to deeply listen, how to listen to what is unsaid, and the tons of specific hacks and tactics you can use to take your listening to the next level with our guest Oscar Trimboli.Oscar Trimboli is on a quest to create 100 million Deep Listeners in the world. He is an author, Host of the Apple Award winning podcast--Deep Listening and a sought-after keynote speaker. He consults for organizations including Cisco, Google, HSBC, and many others. He is the author of the best selling works Breakthroughs: How to confront assumptions and Deep Listening: Impact Beyond Words.If you can listen, you can change the worldThe mission of creating 100 million listeners If you can achieve your goal in your lifetime it’s not ambitious enoughWe are struggling as individuals and the world is struggling - we are distracted, we can’t focus, we are overwhelmed86% of people struggle with distraction todayWe spent the 20th-century learning how to speak, the leadership hack for the 21st century is learning how to listenThe more senior you are, the more you lead, the more time you spend listeningLess than 2% of people have been trained how to listenHow do you teach your kids how to listen? How do you teach your employees how to listen?We listen in 2 dimensions - we listen in black and white right now - but we can listen in more colors, and we can listen more deeply.Listen to someone on TV who you fiercely disagree with. What’s the difference between hearing vs listening? What assumptions and prejudices do you hold?How do you become aware of your listening blind spots?Spend 30 minutes listening to someone who you fiercely disagree with, and you will start to really understand your listening blind spots.We spend a huge chunk of our lives screaming to be noticed. Hearing = here sounds. Listening = make sense of what you hear. The difference between hearing and listening is the action you take. Deep listening is helping the person who is speaking make sense of what they’re saying Three key lessons from neuroscience about listeningWe can listen so much faster than we can speak, it creates a massive opportunity for us to get distractedYou must be an “empty vessel” to focus on someone else and actually listen to them 3 Quick tips to center yourself in a conversationBefore you even think about listening to the speaker, you have to be ready to listen. When somebody says something, treat silence at the end of what they say like it’s another word. 3 Phrases to continue any conversationIn our rush to fill the silence, we miss out on quite a lot. When you use phrases like “tell me more” you give someone the opportunity to align their thoughts more clearly, think through the idea, and figure out the most important themes and ideas to shine through in the conversation. How many breakthroughs are you missing in your organization just because you’re not listening? 5 Levels of Listening“You’ve heard something in 25 minutes that we couldn’t hear in 3 months"A powerful question that can solve insurmountable business problems: Who are you not listening to right now?Sometimes the people you really need to listen to aren’t in the room. The only way to get someone to see the gap between where they are today and where they want to be tomorrow is by ASKING THEM A QUESTION, not by telling them. The magic happens when you put your attention on other people instead of just putting it on yourself.If the question if about YOU and YOUR understanding, it’s not as powerful as a question helping THEM improve THEIR understanding. Homework: Listen to something you deeply disagree with for 30 minutes. 
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Oct 03 2019

52mins

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Neuroscience Hacks You Can Use To Change Behavior, Take Action & Finally Break Through What’s Holding You Back with Dr. David Rock

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In this interview we discuss how to finally break through what’s holding you back, take action, and create lasting habit and behavior change. Less than 30% of people succeed in changing their behavior without using the tools and strategies we share in this interview.  Uncover the neuroscience of how your brain gets stuck and finally start using strategies that really work to create more breakthroughs and results in your life with Dr. David Rock. Dr. David Rock coined the term 'NeuroLeadership' and is the director of the NeuroLeadership Institute. He co-edits the NeuroLeadership Journal and heads up an annual global summit. He is the author of the best-selling 'Your Brain at Work',  'Quiet Leadership',  and the textbook 'Coaching with the Brain in Mind'. He has been featured in the Harvard Business Review, Fortune Magazine, PsychologyToday and many more publications.The brain gets stuck very easily. What happens when we get stuck?Its really hard for our brains to break out of their preexisting molds and patterns of thinking Even breaking out of the smallest mental “schemas” can be very difficult The mechanics of how we get trapped in mental schemas - your subconscious does most of the processing and heavy liftingChanging your thinking patterns is as hard as changing traffic flow on the freeway The unconscious brain is trillions of times more powerful than the conscious brain“Language gives you the ability to alter your experience."The more language you have for your own brain the more you can notice what is going on. Language connects the prefrontal cortex to the rest of the brain. How do you generate more creative insights?If you can even get one day a week of spending your mornings doing contemplative routine, your creative output will explode. After exercise or a nap, or after something fun and restful - when you have energy, when you have the urge to write or create - pay attention to those phenomena and try to tap into them when you get a chance. How do you do a better job paying attention to your mental state and your thoughts?There is ENORMOUS value in learning socially and learning with other people. “Hundreds of percentage” bump in the likelihood of real change.The number one reason that people change is because other people change. This comes from hard scientific data, it’s not theoretical.The default mode network is pretty much always on - and it focuses socially and thinks about how you fit in socially. Social factors are a huge motivation driver - social rewards and social threats are huge drivers of human behavior. The strongest carrots and sticks are SOCIAL. The “SCARF” Model for understanding human behavior, threat response, and how people behave.The brain classifies everything into either danger or opportunity, but it’s a continuum not binary.Managing your “threat state” is one of the most important things you can do. “Help people think better, don’t tell them what to do"Coaching is helping people have their own insights. Conversations, where you help anyone have an insight, is far more likely to create change. Advice is almost always MUCH more about the giver than about what you actually need. How do you actually turn your insights into action?Harness the positive social pressures of learning with other people. The social pressure of learning something together, in little bites, at a time. It helps constantly remind you of the importance of those learning and insights. How do we create organizational change at any scale?Most organizations are pretty good at making priorities, OK on systems, and terrible at the habits. 30% of change initiatives succeed because they ignore habits and human psychology HOMEWORK: Start building language, one habit at a time, find something you’re curious about or want to work on around improving your brain, and learn socially with others. 
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Sep 26 2019

48mins

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School Kills Creativity. Here’s How To Revive It with Chase Jarvis

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In this interview, we discuss why “creativity is the new literacy” and how you can unlock your own creative genius to create the life you want to live. Most people are completely wrong about what they think creativity is and how to be more creative. We dispel the myths about creative work and show you how to build your creative muscle so that you can create breakthroughs, find your calling, and live your dream life with our guest Chase Jarvis.Chase Jarvis is a photographer, director, and social artist. He is the CEO of CreativeLive and works with major brands like Nike, Pepsi, and more. His personal and fine artwork has caught the attention of everyone from mainstream audiences to art critics across the globe. He is the author of the popular books Seattle 100, The Best Camera Is The One That's With You, and the soon to be released Creative Calling.Why “Creativity is the new literacy” and what that means for your career and life The transition between the Renaissance and the Dark Ages Creativity is everything. Creativity is not just art. It’s not just painting. Creativity is the driving factor behind being successful today. What is creativity? Putting two things together to form something new and useful. Fundamental lessons of creativityYou have agency over creating your own life. Humans are naturally creative machines.Creativity is the #1 most sought after characteristic of world-class CEOsCreativity is a superpower and it’s something that we all possess. Creativity is such an important skill set - in today’s world there’s so much noise, so much new information - stepping back and applying creativity is more important than ever The more that you study people who have become successful, the more you realize that you can’t follow the traditional narrative of business schoolThe school system has failed us - it’s a modern-day factory that hurts creativity. 4 Step Process To Live Your Dream LifeFind your calling, find your path, and make your life effortless Once you become creative, you start seeing creative opportunities everywhere - you can’t unsee them. Never tell yourself “I’m not creative” - everyone has the ability to be creative“Creativity is an infinite resource, the more you use the more you get” - Maya Angelou "Shitty first drafts” are the path towards creativityThere’s so much untapped reactivity in the world, so much untapped potential - you have to realize your own untapped potential and unleash it. To uncover your calling, start pulling threads - it’s not a direct journey, it’s an indirect adventureBecome creative is about a mindset shift - and it’s a shift you’re capable of making right now Don’t be the next "so and so” be the first YOU!Entrepreneurship is alchemy, part science part art Science, productivity, achievement etc - they all boil down to developing the skillset of creativityYour brain evolved to keep you alive, NOT to keep you happy! Your mind short circuits into fear in situations where it shouldn’t Homework: Find something that you can make a habit for 10 days that would meet your own definition of creativity, and do it! Homework: Think of more things in your life as CREATIVE ACTS"Make art, and while everyone else is judging your art, make more." -Andy WarholSuccess is not a map. It’s a compass. You have to walk that direction, navigate the obstacles, and figure it out along the way. Just start. 
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Sep 19 2019

52mins

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Are You Learning The Wrong Way? Why 99% of People Are with Scott Young

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In this episode, we discuss how our traditional education system has given us the wrong perspectives on how learning actually works. It’s so easy to fall into the trap of looking for and waiting for the perfect step by step formula, but it’s actually the ability to flexibly experiment that empowers you to be successful in learning, and really anything. We share exactly how you can apply these lessons and much more with our guest Scott Young. Scott Young is a writer and programmer who has undertaken many incredibly challenging self-education projects in his career. These challenges include feats such as attempting to learn MIT's four-year computer science curriculum in twelve months as well as learning four languages in one year. He is the author of the best-selling book Ultralearning: Master Hard Skills, Outsmart the Competition and Accelerate Your Career and his work has been featured in The New York Times, Business Insider, TEDx, and more!Attempting to learn MIT's four-year computer science curriculum in twelve monthsOur expectations around learning are often wrong - and we frequently go about learning the wrong wayHow you can learn any language in less than 3 months How you can harness the power of immersive practice to rapidly accelerate your learningOur traditional education system has given us the wrong perspectives on how learning actually works Practice directly, get feedback, get your hands dirty Self-directed learning is super important - what you want to learn, how you want to learn, and what resources you want to use. It needs to be self-directed.Ultralearning also needs to be focused around efficiency - collecting and learning information as quickly as possible. The powerful concept of “meta-learning” - learning about learning. Before you start ANY learning activity, you want to do some research on what the BEST way to learn is Ultra learning is not a short cut to find a way so you don’t have to do the work but rather prevents you from going down dead ends. If you want to get good at something, you need to do the thing you want to get good at. If you want to know something, ask yourself WHERE and HOW will I use this knowledge?Human beings are really bad at “transfer” - transferring knowledge to new and different contextsThe important difference between “free recall” and “repeated review” when studying information Desirable difficulty in learning. Often the more difficult it is to learn, retrieve or remember somethingThe importance of experimentation. You often want a step by step formula, but those often do not exist. As soon as the formula becomes popular it gets copied to death. The ability to flexibly experiment is a huge skillset towards being successful in learning, and really anything.Start building a toolkit of software tools and mental models to improve your learning and thinking Cultivate a lifelong philosophy of learning new things and adding new thinking tools The greatest moments in your life aren’t because you get a reward, they’re because you experience something that expands your sense of what’s possible How you can use the Feynman Technique to improve your ability to think better and understand complex or confusing topics.How you can debug your own understanding and solve any problem using this powerful technique from a legendary scientist Homework: Think about something you’re learning right now (or trying to learn) think very clearly about the situations where you would use that knowledge or apply that skill. Ask, what kind of situations would this knowledge come up and be relevant? If you read a book, you have to actually IMPLEMENT the IDEAS that you learn from it.
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Sep 12 2019

53mins

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Use These Powerful Thinking Tools To Solve Your Hardest Problems with David Epstein

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In this episode we discuss powerful thinking tools and strategies you can use to break through tough problems and give yourself confidence and clarity when you’re dealing with uncertain situations. We share the breakthrough strategy that was used to invent astrophysics, explore how you can make tough life and career choices, and show you how you can use quick experiments to test, learn, and get results quickly. We share all of this and much more in with our guest David Epstein. David Epstein is the author of Range: Why Generalists Triumph in a Specialized World, and of the New York Times bestseller The Sports Gene. He has master's degrees in environmental science and journalism and has worked as an investigative reporter for ProPublica  and as a senior writer for Sports Illustrated, writing some of their most high-profile investigative stories.We don’t teach the skill of actually THINKING in today’s world. There’s a HUGE advantage in connecting ideas and learning how to think broadly, especially as people specialize more. The more and more people specialize the more powerful range and broad thinking becomes. For much of the 20th century most of progress was driven by specialization, but beginning in the 1980s, most breakthroughs started coming from multidisciplinary combinations and breadth, not depth. The “cult of the head start” - the drive to specialize as narrowly and as early as possible. What can we learn from the story of Tiger Woods? Traditional chess is an activity where early specialization is really important. Moraveck’s paradox - humans and machines have opposite strengths and weaknesses.In freestyle chess, you outsource the pattern study to the computer, and you focus on the higher level strategy - it becomes a completely different game. That’s what has happened to success in today’s world.“A broader set of integrative skills” is where humans can add the most value. How “wicked learning environments” like business, investing, medicine, and human interaction are much trickier to navigate, and what that means for how you learn and improve Learning and improvement in “kind domains” vs “wicked domains” Using “Fermi Problems” to navigate tough situations and learning environmentsThe Importance of “broadly applicable reasoning tools” over highly specific knowledge Analogies are one of the most important tools for creative problem solvingSuccessful problem solvers are more able to determine the deep structure of a problem before they proceed to match a strategy to it.“Switchers are winners” - why changing your job or changing what you study can end up being a huge win for you. The economics concept of “match quality” and how it can impact the direction of your lifeWho wins the tradeoff between early and late specializers? Grit is great, but strategic quitting can be a great thing. Even the researcher of Grit, Angela Duckworth, supports changing directions. Which among my various possible selves should I start to explore now? How can I do that?Taking a beginning fiction writing class helped David become a better nonfiction writer. How you can use the Japanese concept of “Bansho” to improve your thinking and become a more effective learner “Making connections” knowledge  vs “Using procedures” knowledge. Drawing broad and deep connections instead of learning routines. The power of using “Interleaving” as a learning method. Forcing learners into "conceptual thinking" improves deep and longer lasting learning. Homework: Create a “book of small experiments” and start testing the things you might want to do or learn. Do something new once a quarter. Create a hypothesis of why you want to explore that interest and test the hypothesis. Homework: Whenever you’re thinking about a project you’re going to take on, you will make predictions about how that project will go, use the ‘outside view’ instead of the ‘inside view.’
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Sep 05 2019

55mins

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