Here’s the link to join our Top Five Tuesday Email List: https://nowthatwereafamily.lpages.co/now-that-were-a-family-website/ We did not want to leave you hanging after last week’s episode regarding the future of the podcast. We also didn’t want to miss an opportunity to share our engagement story. These two topics are not related.  At all.

Here’s the link to join our Top Five Tuesday Email List: <a href="https://nowthatwereafamily.lpages.co/now-that-were-a-family-website/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://nowthatwereafamily.lpages.co/now-that-were-a-family-website/</a> We did not want to leave you hanging after last week’s episode regarding the future of the podcast. We also didn’t want to miss an opportunity to share our engagement story. These two topics are not related. At all.

119: Our Engagement Story // Future of the Podcast

This episode turned into quite the venting session. Sorry about that . . .We really don’t want to make a drastic decision but we also want to acknowledge the fact that we may need to make changes in our life. Let us know your thoughts in the comments. We want what the Lord wants with this podcast.

This episode turned into quite the venting session. Sorry about that . . .We really don’t want to make a drastic decision but we also want to acknowledge the fact that we may need to make changes in our life. Let us know your thoughts in the comments. We want what the Lord wants with this podcast.

118: Thinking About Quitting The Podcast // Learning From Past Mistakes

The topic of money can be so intimidating and emotional. We’ve had some ups and downs in this area and certainly don’t have the answers. But we do have our story and we share on this episode!  Bible Verses Referenced:  Mathew 5:45 Proverbs 22:13 Proverbs 26:13 Colossians 3:23 Info On Understanding Proverbs: https://bibleproject.com/learn/proverbs/ The Business/Self Development Books We Read in Our First Month Of Marriage:  The Compound Effect by Darren Hardy The 4 Hour Work Week by Timothy Ferriss The Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod The 10X Rule By Grant Cardone

The topic of money can be so intimidating and emotional. We’ve had some ups and downs in this area and certainly don’t have the answers. But we do have our story and we share on this episode! Bible Verses Referenced: Mathew 5:45 Proverbs 22:13 Proverbs 26:13 Colossians 3:23 Info On Understanding Proverbs: <a href="https://bibleproject.com/learn/proverbs/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://bibleproject.com/learn/proverbs/</a> The Business/Self Development Books We Read in Our First Month Of Marriage: The Compound Effect by Darren Hardy The 4 Hour Work Week by Timothy Ferriss The Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod The 10X Rule By Grant Cardone

117: Being Broke As Newlyweds // Why It’s Better Than Being Poor

So many of us have a desire to raise our children in a way that is counter cultural. But why? It might be easy to see that culture and society aren’t in accordance with God. However, that doesn’t make everything counter to culture Godly. What is our motivation for raising our children differently and how can we best do it? We don’t have the answers but we like speculating and making observations. . . Bible Verses Referenced:  John 15:19 Proverbs 22:6 1st Timothy 5:8 Ephesians 6:4 Romans 6

So many of us have a desire to raise our children in a way that is counter cultural. But why? It might be easy to see that culture and society aren’t in accordance with God. However, that doesn’t make everything counter to culture Godly. What is our motivation for raising our children differently and how can we best do it? We don’t have the answers but we like speculating and making observations. . . Bible Verses Referenced:  John 15:19 Proverbs 22:6 1st Timothy 5:8 Ephesians 6:4 Romans 6

116: The Danger Of Raising Counter Cultural Kids

Thank you for all the great questions! We received hundreds so obviously we are not going to get around to answering all of them on this episode. However, some of the questions were SO GOOD that we decided to wait and do full episodes on them in the coming weeks. This one gets a little intimated as we discuss sex, being jealous for our spouse, pornography as well as some light-hearted topics. Hope you enjoy!

Thank you for all the great questions! We received hundreds so obviously we are not going to get around to answering all of them on this episode. However, some of the questions were SO GOOD that we decided to wait and do full episodes on them in the coming weeks. This one gets a little intimated as we discuss sex, being jealous for our spouse, pornography as well as some light-hearted topics. Hope you enjoy!

115: Q&A // Asking Your Husband About His Purity Life

This is definitely one of those episodes where we bring you guys in on a conversation we are currently having. We never want to stop pruning our marriage and chasing out the foxes.   Hopefully we hit on some things that resinate with you and relate to your marriage and that you are able to grow from it. Bible Verses Referenced:  Psalm 37:4 Genesis 2:24 Romans 10:17

This is definitely one of those episodes where we bring you guys in on a conversation we are currently having. We never want to stop pruning our marriage and chasing out the foxes. Hopefully we hit on some things that resinate with you and relate to your marriage and that you are able to grow from it. Bible Verses Referenced: Psalm 37:4 Genesis 2:24 Romans 10:17

114: Keeping Score in Marriage—And You’re Working Harder Than Your Spouse

We hope you enjoy this week’s conversation. Biblical roles in marriage can kinda be a sensitive subject. Kinda? . . .yeah right!  It is a straight up emotional and dicey topic. That said, being on the same page with your spouse on this subject is such a blessing! Yet not being on the same page can cause great hurt and disfunction in the home. We don’t have all the answers but we do have the desire to learn what God wants and how it should look in our marriage. Hopefully this episode sparks a conversation in your home! Here are the verses and resources we referenced: Ephesians 5:22-30 1st Corinthians 11 Titus 2:4 1st Timothy 5:8 Genesis 2:18 FamilyLife Article: https://www.familylife.com/articles/topics/marriage/staying-married/wives/what-should-be-the-wifes-role-in-marriage/

We hope you enjoy this week’s conversation. Biblical roles in marriage can kinda be a sensitive subject. Kinda? . . .yeah right! It is a straight up emotional and dicey topic. That said, being on the same page with your spouse on this subject is such a blessing! Yet not being on the same page can cause great hurt and disfunction in the home. We don’t have all the answers but we do have the desire to learn what God wants and how it should look in our marriage. Hopefully this episode sparks a conversation in your home! Here are the verses and resources we referenced: Ephesians 5:22-30 1st Corinthians 11 Titus 2:4 1st Timothy 5:8 Genesis 2:18 FamilyLife Article: <a href="https://www.familylife.com/articles/topics/marriage/staying-married/wives/what-should-be-the-wifes-role-in-marriage/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://www.familylife.com/articles/topics/marriage/staying-married/wives/what-should-be-the-wifes-role-in-marriage/</a>

113: A Woman’s Role In Marriage // How I Failed

First off, if you listen to the end then you will hear something that has never been done in Now That We’re A Family Podcast history. . . Second, we are passionate about being parents, yet, we get distracted from our priorities and sometimes fall prey to the many traps the devil sets for Christian parents. But being a parent is THE GREATEST ministry opportunity we will ever have! We want so badly to stay on track and we hope this episode can you help you do just that as well. 

First off, if you listen to the end then you will hear something that has never been done in Now That We’re A Family Podcast history. . . Second, we are passionate about being parents, yet, we get distracted from our priorities and sometimes fall prey to the many traps the devil sets for Christian parents. But being a parent is THE GREATEST ministry opportunity we will ever have! We want so badly to stay on track and we hope this episode can you help you do just that as well.

112: Resenting Fatherhood

Every day we have picture-perfect living rooms, vacations, and families showing up in our newsfeeds. It’s easy to discredit or demonize the person we are envying, believing it is their fault that we are faced with this sin in our hearts. But in reality, we are hating the good side of envy. There isn’t anything wrong with the good. The evil is our response to it.It’s ironic to hate someone who has something we desire, are working for, or want, but when we finally earn that same thing we see ourselves as heroic.Today we are talking about how to find contentment in any stage of life. How envy can actually start a process that is good. What we do when we are more vulnerable to envious thoughts. And how to find inspiration instead of frustration when we see someone who has something we desire. Congratulations!  As a small thank you for writing a review on itunes, we randomly selected five people to buy coffee for this week! Message, email, or comment below your paypal email so we can venmo you. Thank you again so much from the bottom of our hearts. 1. hannaswenor2. strongsmom3. Jr and Kat4. RachaelNC5. Alonnah Thomson  References we paraphrased:  Proverbs 22:3  1st John 2:16 Ecclesiastes 1:9  Hebrews 13: 8  Blessings to your family from ours, and thank you for listening!  Elisha and Katie

Every day we have picture-perfect living rooms, vacations, and families showing up in our newsfeeds. It’s easy to discredit or demonize the person we are envying, believing it is their fault that we are faced with this sin in our hearts. But in reality, we are hating the good side of envy. There isn’t anything wrong with the good. The evil is our response to it. It’s ironic to hate someone who has something we desire, are working for, or want, but when we finally earn that same thing we see ourselves as heroic. Today we are talking about how to find contentment in any stage of life. How envy can actually start a process that is good. What we do when we are more vulnerable to envious thoughts. And how to find inspiration instead of frustration when we see someone who has something we desire. <h2>Congratulations! </h2> As a small thank you for writing a review on itunes, we randomly selected five people to buy coffee for this week! Message, email, or comment below your paypal email so we can venmo you. Thank you again so much from the bottom of our hearts. 1. hannaswenor 2. strongsmom 3. Jr and Kat 4. RachaelNC 5. Alonnah Thomson <h2>References we paraphrased: </h2> Proverbs 22:3 1st John 2:16 Ecclesiastes 1:9 Hebrews 13: 8 Blessings to your family from ours, and thank you for listening! <h3>Elisha and Katie</h3>

111: The Good Side of Envy

You hear about people loosing themselves when they become a mother or father. They no longer have the time they once had, and it seems like overnight life has completely changed. Today on the podcast we are talking about the two outcomes that can come from finding our identity in parenthood — pride or despair.  And touching on other ways parents can cope when they feel trapped being “just a mom” or “just a dad.” Elisha is sharing his own crisis moments where he has felt limited or defined by being a “dad,” and we’re unpacking how to navigate the identity changes that inevitably come with a job change, a new child, a move, a disability, or any seismic shift life throws at us. As always, we hope you are encouraged and have a little fun!  Elisha and Katie Voetberg  Identity References:  Galatians 2:20 Romans 6:6 Genesis 1:27 Jeremiah 1:5 1st Peter 2:9 Ephesians 2:10 2nd Timothy 1:7 Colossians 3:1-4 2nd Corinthians 5:17

You hear about people loosing themselves when they become a mother or father. They no longer have the time they once had, and it seems like overnight life has completely changed. Today on the podcast we are talking about the two outcomes that can come from finding our identity in parenthood — pride or despair. And touching on other ways parents can cope when they feel trapped being “just a mom” or “just a dad.” Elisha is sharing his own crisis moments where he has felt limited or defined by being a “dad,” and we’re unpacking how to navigate the identity changes that inevitably come with a job change, a new child, a move, a disability, or any seismic shift life throws at us. As always, we hope you are encouraged and have a little fun! <h3>Elisha and Katie Voetberg </h3> <h2>Identity References: </h2> Galatians 2:20 Romans 6:6 Genesis 1:27 Jeremiah 1:5 1st Peter 2:9 Ephesians 2:10 2nd Timothy 1:7 Colossians 3:1-4 2nd Corinthians 5:17

110: Identity Crisis as a Parent // Losing Yourself

This podcast is a tremendous blessing and a must listen! ❤️

Amazing podcast!

Always so uplifting. I love listening to Katie and Elisha. Keep up the great work, guys!

Encouraging Young Christian Families

Now That We're A Family

Sex is an emotionally charged subject and one Christians seem to tiptoe around. Our goal is to address, in a tactful manner, some of the questions we get on a regular basis about sex after marriage, and hopefully encourage you to grow, heal, and mature the physical intimacy in your marriage. 

Sex is an emotionally charged subject and one Christians seem to tiptoe around. Our goal is to address, in a tactful manner, some of the questions we get on a regular basis about sex after marriage, and hopefully encourage you to grow, heal, and mature the physical intimacy in your marriage.

046: When Your Sex Life is Boring, Pornography, and Pain After Pregnancy

Since becoming pregnant with our third child, the topic of how expensive children are has come up so much! So, we thought we would share our thoughts. We hope you enjoy!

Since becoming pregnant with our third child, the topic of how expensive children are has come up so much! So, we thought we would share our thoughts. We hope you enjoy!

009: How Many Kids We Can Afford

054: Our Biggest Marriage Conflicts: Money, Sex, Roles.

Elisha: Sex is still a priority. People say if you want to see what someone prioritizes, look at their calendar and bank statement. In other words, we give our time and money to what we value most. I am grateful Katie and I had wise and faithful council in our life prior to having our first child that iterated and reiterated the importance of a vibrant sex life while in the midst of raising children. It makes sense, considering that parenting is something designed to be carried out by a united, married, couple. If we are neglecting the one activity that sets marriage apart from other platonic relationships, how can we say we are a united, married couple? Even in the craziness of taking care of babies and raising young children, we still find a way to prioritize what is important to us. We still feed ourselves food, manage our hygiene, and pay the bills. If we can do those things, we should most definitely make time for marital intimacy. Katie: God didn’t create Sex to Be Lame After Kids. He created sex to be enjoyed within marriage . . . and he created marriages to “be fruitful and multiply!”Think about it. Even if you wait 5 years to have a baby–okay, let’s say 10 years–you’re still a parent waaaay longer than you were ever one-on-one with your spouse. Satan populates the myth that sex is only exciting OUTSIDE of marriage. No kids attached. No ring attached. No strings whatsoever. But God creates the ideal. Satan can only cheapen what God has created. To me, that means our marriage intimacy, yes, even after kids, was ultimately created to be the most sexy, erotic, pleasurable experience we can fantisize, within the guidelines of scripture. Regardless of where our marriage is on a day in and day out basis, that is what Elisha and I want to work towards. Elisha: It’s not about expectations, it’s about willingness to grow. The truth is, Katie and I both had really high expectations for our post-baby sex life. Maybe even unrealistic expectations. That’s a bad thing, right? It wasn’t for us. Why? Because our expectation for a great sex life was not nearly as high as our expectation for our need to learn and grow. Because we had people telling us that sex could be awesome after kids we truly believed and expected that to be the case for us. So, when it wasn’t awesome right off the bat, we didn’t stop believing, we started finding ways to grow and improve. We did not settle. We were not victims to this new flow of life. We were students. Katie: What are We Telling Ourselves? What are we telling ourselves when it comes to marital sex after kids? Are we embracing that it is good, biblical, holy, unifying? Do we think of something ugly or traumatic that happened in our past? Do we think of it as just one more exhausting task on the to-do list? What are we telling ourselves when it comes to our spouse? Do we tell them how hot they are? Do we take the effort to verbalize the things we love about their bodies? Their minds? Their personalities? Or do we criticize, compare, and tear them down? What are we telling ourselves when it comes to our own bodies? Ladies, I’ve been there. Saggy, sad, maybe even ashamed of my postpartum scars and extra weight. It was brutally difficult to break past those mental barriers and countless insecurities to let my husband find pleasure in me. I mean, even now, I’m sitting here feeling like a whale nearing my third trimester. Every day it’s a struggle to work to tell myself that I am beautiful . . . and I am beautiful in his eyes. (That said, this is why working out, supplementing, and eating well is so important to Elisha and I. We don’t want to fight that mental battle on a regular basis.) Mindset effects our physical intimacy just like everything else, and I want to be so careful I’m listening to God’s Word and not culture.  Elisha: Postpartum Does Not mean Post-Romantic Life.As a man, I felt weird and awkward trying to be romantic around my postpartum wife after our first child. I didn’t want her to think I wanted sex when we both knew it was off the table. So no more snuggles, no love notes, no picking up flowers on my way home from work. That was not good. Why? Well, by the time Katie’s body was ready for intimacy, we were emotionally miles apart. She was convinced I wasn’t attracted to her and I was convinced that my light-hearted and playful lover was gone forever into “responsible” mommy-land. I think this happens a lot. The husband doesn’t want to come across as insensitive to his wife’s new role as a mother, and the wife is unsure her husband still desires her like he did before. It goes undiscussed, so the mother goes into ex-lover-full-time-mommy-mode and the husbands puts up a facade acting as though his sexual drive is no longer existent in effort to be a “gracious husband.” Katie and I want to communicate during seasons of abstinence so we’re both on the same page and still unified in our decision. “Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” 1st Corinth. 7:5 Katie: Our Bodies are Not Our OwnIf God’s Word didn’t say it, I wouldn’t believe it. We live in a time in history, where the good desire to protect the abused and mistreated has somehow twisted into affirming a self-seeking independent spirit. This leaves no room for the healthy dependance and fulfilment that comes from wholly giving yourself to your spouse in a biblically sexual way. “The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.” 1st Corinth 7:4Can this verse be taken out of context and misused? Yes. But here God is speaking of a healthy, safe, protected relationship that is mutually giving and receiving. Because of this verse, physical intimacy is never off the table for our marriage. (That said, I live with a husband who dwells with me according to knowledge, and is thoughtful of when he approaches me.)Elisha and I will never reject one another. And sex is never with-held as a punishment. Ultimately, we live in a fallen world, where sickness, physical pain, and sin are prevalent. Physical intimacy is such a large subject, dependent on so many other factors of marriage, but our goal is to always be reaching and growing to the beautiful ideal of marriage God paints for us in his scripture. Learning with you,Katie and Elisha Voetberg

<h4>Elisha: Sex is still a priority. </h4>People say if you want to see what someone prioritizes, look at their calendar and bank statement. In other words, we give our time and money to what we value most. I am grateful Katie and I had wise and faithful council in our life prior to having our first child that iterated and reiterated the importance of a vibrant sex life while in the midst of raising children. It makes sense, considering that parenting is something designed to be carried out by a united, married, couple. If we are neglecting the one activity that sets marriage apart from other platonic relationships, how can we say we are a united, married couple? Even in the craziness of taking care of babies and raising young children, we still find a way to prioritize what is important to us. We still feed ourselves food, manage our hygiene, and pay the bills. If we can do those things, we should most definitely make time for marital intimacy. <h4>Katie: God didn’t create Sex to Be Lame After Kids. </h4>He created sex to be enjoyed within marriage . . . and he created marriages to “be fruitful and multiply!” Think about it. Even if you wait 5 years to have a baby–okay, let’s say 10 years–you’re still a parent waaaay longer than you were ever one-on-one with your spouse. Satan populates the myth that sex is only exciting OUTSIDE of marriage. No kids attached. No ring attached. No strings whatsoever. But God creates the ideal. Satan can only cheapen what God has created. To me, that means our marriage intimacy, yes, even after kids, was ultimately created to be the most sexy, erotic, pleasurable experience we can fantisize, within the guidelines of scripture. Regardless of where our marriage is on a day in and day out basis, that is what Elisha and I want to work towards. <h4>Elisha: It’s not about expectations, it’s about willingness to grow. </h4>The truth is, Katie and I both had really high expectations for our post-baby sex life. Maybe even unrealistic expectations. That’s a bad thing, right? It wasn’t for us. Why? Because our expectation for a great sex life was not nearly as high as our expectation for our need to learn and grow. Because we had people telling us that sex could be awesome after kids we truly believed and expected that to be the case for us. So, when it wasn’t awesome right off the bat, we didn’t stop believing, we started finding ways to grow and improve. We did not settle. We were not victims to this new flow of life. We were students. <h4>Katie: What are We Telling Ourselves? </h4>What are we telling ourselves when it comes to marital sex after kids? Are we embracing that it is good, biblical, holy, unifying? Do we think of something ugly or traumatic that happened in our past? Do we think of it as just one more exhausting task on the to-do list? What are we telling ourselves when it comes to our spouse? Do we tell them how hot they are? Do we take the effort to verbalize the things we love about their bodies? Their minds? Their personalities? Or do we criticize, compare, and tear them down? What are we telling ourselves when it comes to our own bodies? Ladies, I’ve been there. Saggy, sad, maybe even ashamed of my postpartum scars and extra weight. It was brutally difficult to break past those mental barriers and countless insecurities to let my husband find pleasure in me. I mean, even now, I’m sitting here feeling like a whale nearing my third trimester. Every day it’s a struggle to work to tell myself that I am beautiful . . . and I am beautiful in his eyes. (That said, this is why working out, supplementing, and eating well is so important to Elisha and I. We don’t want to fight that mental battle on a regular basis.) Mindset effects our physical intimacy just like everything else, and I want to be so careful I’m listening to God’s Word and not culture. <h4>Elisha: Postpartum Does Not mean Post-Romantic Life.</h4>As a man, I felt weird and awkward trying to be romantic around my postpartum wife after our first child. I didn’t want her to think I wanted sex when we both knew it was off the table. So no more snuggles, no love notes, no picking up flowers on my way home from work. That was not good. Why? Well, by the time Katie’s body was ready for intimacy, we were emotionally miles apart. She was convinced I wasn’t attracted to her and I was convinced that my light-hearted and playful lover was gone forever into “responsible” mommy-land. I think this happens a lot. The husband doesn’t want to come across as insensitive to his wife’s new role as a mother, and the wife is unsure her husband still desires her like he did before. It goes undiscussed, so the mother goes into ex-lover-full-time-mommy-mode and the husbands puts up a facade acting as though his sexual drive is no longer existent in effort to be a “gracious husband.” Katie and I want to communicate during seasons of abstinence so we’re both on the same page and still unified in our decision. <blockquote>“Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” 1st Corinth. 7:5 </blockquote><h4>Katie: Our Bodies are Not Our Own</h4>If God’s Word didn’t say it, I wouldn’t believe it. We live in a time in history, where the good desire to protect the abused and mistreated has somehow twisted into affirming a self-seeking independent spirit. This leaves no room for the healthy dependance and fulfilment that comes from wholly giving yourself to your spouse in a biblically sexual way. <blockquote>“The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.” 1st Corinth 7:4</blockquote>Can this verse be taken out of context and misused? Yes. But here God is speaking of a healthy, safe, protected relationship that is mutually giving and receiving. Because of this verse, physical intimacy is never off the table for our marriage. (That said, I live with a husband who dwells with me according to knowledge, and is thoughtful of when he approaches me.) Elisha and I will never reject one another. And sex is never with-held as a punishment. Ultimately, we live in a fallen world, where sickness, physical pain, and sin are prevalent. Physical intimacy is such a large subject, dependent on so many other factors of marriage, but our goal is to always be reaching and growing to the beautiful ideal of marriage God paints for us in his scripture. Learning with you, Katie and Elisha Voetberg

013: What No One Tells You About Sex After Kids

LEAD

030: How To Encourage Your Husband In Spiritual Leadership // Why Men Feel Inadequate to Lead

Jenise Johnson

What a treat to sit down with Katie’s parents and pick their brains about marriage and family. Here are the links we mention in the show.   Keep up with Chad, Jenise and the Big Ski Family here: http://www.thebigskifamily.comhttps://www.instagram.com/thebigskifamily/https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCztQCPP0fVADcB1j4LRXDkA/featured Chad and Jenise’s Newly Wed Retreat:https://newlywedretreat.wixsite.com/website Books:-Five Love Languages-Gary Chapman His Needs Her Needs- Willard F. Harley, Jr. Now That We’re a Family Links: http://nowthatwereafamily.comhttps://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAS7ynQvWwgGdHVJ63HieLA?view_as=subscriberhttps://www.instagram.com/nowthatimamother/https://www.instagram.com/nowthatimafather/

What a treat to sit down with Katie’s parents and pick their brains about marriage and family. Here are the links we mention in the show. Keep up with Chad, Jenise and the Big Ski Family here: <a href="http://www.thebigskifamily.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">http://www.thebigskifamily.com</a> <a href="https://www.instagram.com/thebigskifamily/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://www.instagram.com/thebigskifamily/</a> <a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCztQCPP0fVADcB1j4LRXDkA/featured" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCztQCPP0fVADcB1j4LRXDkA/featured</a> Chad and Jenise’s Newly Wed Retreat: <a href="https://newlywedretreat.wixsite.com/website" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://newlywedretreat.wixsite.com/website</a> Books: -Five Love Languages-Gary Chapman His Needs Her Needs- Willard F. Harley, Jr. Now That We’re a Family Links: <a href="http://nowthatwereafamily.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">http://nowthatwereafamily.com</a> <a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAS7ynQvWwgGdHVJ63HieLA?view_as=subscriber" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAS7ynQvWwgGdHVJ63HieLA?view_as=subscriber</a> <a href="https://www.instagram.com/nowthatimamother/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://www.instagram.com/nowthatimamother/</a> <a href="https://www.instagram.com/nowthatimafather/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://www.instagram.com/nowthatimafather/</a>

010: Twenty Five Years of Marriage and 11 Children — How to Keep The Spark Alive with Chad and Jenise Johnson

Thank you so much for participating on this episode with your fun questions about our marriage! We don’t know much but we do like talking about our own experiences and what we’ve learned from them. We hope our stories and responses are encouraging and entertaining to you! Follow Us On Instagram and YouTube! https://www.instagram.com/nowthatimamother/ https://www.instagram.com/nowthatimafather/ https://www.instagram.com/nowthatimafather/

Thank you so much for participating on this episode with your fun questions about our marriage! We don’t know much but we do like talking about our own experiences and what we’ve learned from them. We hope our stories and responses are encouraging and entertaining to you! Follow Us On Instagram and YouTube! <a href="https://www.instagram.com/nowthatimamother/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://www.instagram.com/nowthatimamother/</a> <a href="https://www.instagram.com/nowthatimafather/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://www.instagram.com/nowthatimafather/</a> <a href="https://www.instagram.com/nowthatimafather/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">https://www.instagram.com/nowthatimafather/</a>

007: Marriage Q And A: Sex, Insecurities, Cheap Dates. . .

Kyla VanWingerden

049: Miscarriage, First year of marriage, and Moving Away From Family – Adam and Kyla VanWingerden

031: Five Changes We’ve Made Since Having Our Third Child

Does God want wives to be doormats? Today we’re talking about Ephesians 5:23 and what God-honoring submission does and does NOT look like in a marriage. In the twenty-first century, submission can be a sticky topic, but we believe the danger of this passage is because it has been twisted by culture, the devil, or our expectations.    So, what DOES God mean when he calls wives to submit to their husbands? And is submission still relevant today? 

Does God want wives to be doormats? Today we’re talking about Ephesians 5:23 and what God-honoring submission does and does NOT look like in a marriage. In the twenty-first century, submission can be a sticky topic, but we believe the danger of this passage is because it has been twisted by culture, the devil, or our expectations. So, what DOES God mean when he calls wives to submit to their husbands? And is submission still relevant today?

029: Should Wives Submit to Their Husbands?

056: Child Training: The good, bad, and ugly.

At first I thought I didn’t hear him correctly. BE your dream home? Didn’t Elisha mean, “create your dream home? Make your dream home? Have your dream home?” Turns out, he meant all those things, and I love this vision he painted for me of BEING our dream home. I hope it encourages you in whatever space you’re currently in! Love, Katie Voetberg

At first I thought I didn’t hear him correctly. BE your dream home? Didn’t Elisha mean, “create your dream home? Make your dream home? Have your dream home?” Turns out, he meant all those things, and I love this vision he painted for me of BEING our dream home. I hope it encourages you in whatever space you’re currently in! Love, <h3> Katie Voetberg</h3>

036: How To BE Your Dream Home

055: When Your Marriage is Blah // Getting The Spark Back

042: Elisha Opens Up About Something For The First Time

Elisha and I go wayyyyy back. So people assume we established a friendship. Started dating. And got married. But really, we got that backwards. We got married and then became best friends.  It’s hard to believe we knew each other for over a decade before we even had our first conversation (if that’s what you could call our awkward dialogue), so today we’re telling our love story on the podcast. If you’re more a visual type, we talked it out here on our family vlog channel a few months ago. Here is the first email Elisha sent me—completely out of the blue—and my response. They’re laughable now, but when I look back and remember all the time, effort, and thought we put into crafting each individual word I get all warm inside. ELISHA’S FIRST EMAIL TO KATIEA Few Photos Outlining our Relationship   I’m directly above Elisha here. I was 15 and he was 19. He asked me to dance . . . but you can see the competition I was up against at every event, haha.   A wedding where both of us were on a break from our current relationships. Still awkward. But still drawn to each other by some strange law of attraction. It’s fun to look back and see how God had a plan the whole time.   The “Achademy” Man Camp where I finally told Elisha I liked him and we were almost caught alone at midnight. (See why I was such a big fan? He’s good at everything.)   One of our dates with all my siblings.   Me basically enjoying touching Elisha’s face and everyone else totally annoyed. We played in a volleyball league the first 3 months we dated . . . and took the championship. (Other people pictured are Kyla, my awesome sister, and Cody, Elisha’s good friend).   Two weeks before we almost broke up for good (but ended up getting engaged instead). Disneyland was fun, but this was a stressful time in our relationship because we didn’t know what was going to happen.   Elisha’s Facebook announcement Picture: This just in: Elisha Peter Voetberg is engaged to Kathryn Joy Johnson. True story.  Our Engagement Photo  Our first two months of marriage in Bend, Oregon! Becoming best friends.   Here’s to your own love story! And continuing to fall in love over the years. Elisha and Katie Voetberg P.S. Would you mind leaving us a review on itunes? You can leave one here. 

Elisha and I go wayyyyy back. So people assume we established a friendship. Started dating. And got married. But really, we got that backwards. We got married and then became best friends. It’s hard to believe we knew each other for over a decade before we even had our first conversation (if that’s what you could call our awkward dialogue), so today we’re telling our love story on the podcast. If you’re more a visual type, we talked it out here on our <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VEci1YJ7C_A&amp;t=69s" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">family vlog channel</a> a few months ago. <a href="http://nowthatwereafamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/Our-First-Emails.pdf" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Here is the first email Elisha sent me</a>—completely out of the blue—and my response. They’re laughable now, but when I look back and remember all the time, effort, and thought we put into crafting each individual word I get all warm inside. <a href="http://nowthatwereafamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/Our-First-Emails.pdf" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">ELISHA’S FIRST EMAIL TO KATIE</a><h2>A Few Photos Outlining our Relationship </h2> I’m directly above Elisha here. I was 15 and he was 19. He asked me to dance . . . but you can see the competition I was up against at every event, haha. A wedding where both of us were on a break from our current relationships. Still awkward. But still drawn to each other by some strange law of attraction. It’s fun to look back and see how God had a plan the whole time. The “Achademy” Man Camp where I finally told Elisha I liked him and we were almost caught alone at midnight. (See why I was such a big fan? He’s good at everything.) One of our dates with all my siblings. Me basically enjoying touching Elisha’s face and everyone else totally annoyed. We played in a volleyball league the first 3 months we dated . . . and took the championship. (Other people pictured are Kyla, my awesome sister, and Cody, Elisha’s good friend). Two weeks before we almost broke up for good (but ended up getting engaged instead). Disneyland was fun, but this was a stressful time in our relationship because we didn’t know what was going to happen. Elisha’s Facebook announcement Picture: This just in: <a href="https://www.facebook.com/elisha.voetberg?__tn__=%2CdK%2AF-R&amp;eid=ARBAuOMT48_S-0Tejwbcq9LQtO9Ap14mMjX3nIYKa7E1D7U53tg9ivR6GJfXrtNxjc0ktzHmoVXQecUc" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Elisha Peter Voetberg</a> is engaged to Kathryn Joy Johnson. True story. Our Engagement Photo Our first two months of marriage in Bend, Oregon! Becoming best friends. Here’s to your own love story! And continuing to fall in love over the years. Elisha and Katie Voetberg P.S. <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/now-that-were-a-family/id1448169027?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Would you mind leaving us a review on itunes? You can leave one here. </a>

015: Our Love Story | How We Met

050: A Juicy Spontaneous Episode

Do you want a roadmap to meeting your spouses’ needs?We sure do! This last weekend, we went to a marriage workshop where my dad, @thegiant5guy, shared on the popular book “His Needs, Her Needs.” But what really stuck with us, was his practical application. We don’t just want a good message, we want to know how to actively work on our marriage to make it better! Elisha and I used this tool to rate each other on how well we were meeting each other’s needs, and it started some great conversation for us! We hope it provides you with conversation and overall growth in your marriage as well. Side note**if you want to see how we rated each other, check out the podcast “Now That We’re A Family” down below, or on your favorite podcast app. HIS NEEDSSexRecreational CompanionshipAn Attractive SpouseDomestic SupportAdmirationHER NEEDSAffectionConversationOpenness and HonestyFinancial SupportFamily LeadershipIf you aren’t familiar with these, we break them down on the podcast, but for the most part, they’re pretty explanatory! MAKE IT PRACTICALIf you’re one of the hundreds of people that downloaded the 1-10 scale we use ALL the time in our marriage, you’re ready to dive in. If not, click HERE and we’ll send you one of the easiest ways to test the health of your marriage. Now that you’ve got the 1-10 scale in your toolbox, here’s the His Needs, Her Needs tool we adapted from this weekend. DOWNLOAD THE HIS NEEDS, HER NEEDS TOOL. DOWNLOAD HERE First, rate how well you think your spouse is doing at filling your needs. DON’T SHOW YOUR SPOUSE YOUR PAPER. Next, ask your spouse how well THEY think they are doing at meeting your needs. Circle their answers on your sheet.            When you are done filling out your tool and you share your answers with each other, keep two things in mind. #1: Your spouse is just giving you a number . . . a way to improve. Don’t stress if it’s lower than you thought! It’s just a number, not an indicator of your marriage as a whole. #2: Remember your spouse isn’t responsible for making your marriage glorious . . . you are. Marriage isn’t a 50/50 relationship where we constantly are wondering if our spouse is meeting us in the middle. A fantastic marriage is 100% our responsibility. But we’ll leave the “100 percent Solution for another blog . . . ” May the Lord richly bless your marriage and draw you closer to oneness! Learning with you,Elisha and Katie VoetbergLeave Us a Review on ITUNES! 

Do you want a roadmap to meeting your spouses’ needs? We sure do! This last weekend, we went to a marriage workshop where my dad, <a href="https://www.instagram.com/thegiant5guy/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">@thegiant5guy</a>, shared on the popular book “His Needs, Her Needs.” But what really stuck with us, was his practical application. We don’t just want a good message, we want to know how to actively work on our marriage to make it better! Elisha and I used this tool to rate each other on how well we were meeting each other’s needs, and it started some great conversation for us! We hope it provides you with conversation and overall growth in your marriage as well. Side note**if you want to see how we rated each other, check out the podcast “Now That We’re A Family” down below, or on your favorite podcast app. <h2>HIS NEEDS</h2><ol><li>Sex</li><li>Recreational Companionship</li><li>An Attractive Spouse</li><li>Domestic Support</li><li>Admiration</li></ol><h2>HER NEEDS</h2><ol><li>Affection</li><li>Conversation</li><li>Openness and Honesty</li><li>Financial Support</li><li>Family Leadership</li></ol>If you aren’t familiar with these, we break them down on the podcast, but for the most part, they’re pretty explanatory! <h2>MAKE IT PRACTICAL</h2>If you’re one of the hundreds of people that downloaded the <a href="https://nowthatwereafamily.lpages.co/the-marriage-gauge-1/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">1-10 scale</a> we use ALL the time in our marriage, you’re ready to dive in. If not, click <a href="https://nowthatwereafamily.lpages.co/the-marriage-gauge-1/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">HERE</a> and we’ll send you one of the easiest ways to test the health of your marriage. Now that you’ve got the 1-10 scale in your toolbox, here’s the His Needs, Her Needs tool we adapted from this weekend. <a href="http://nowthatwereafamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/NTWF-Freebie-His-Needs-Her-Needs.pdf" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">DOWNLOAD THE HIS NEEDS, HER NEEDS TOOL. </a> <a href="http://nowthatwereafamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/NTWF-Freebie-His-Needs-Her-Needs.pdf" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">DOWNLOAD HERE</a><ul><li> First, rate how well you think your spouse is doing at filling your needs. </li></ul><ul><li>DON’T SHOW YOUR SPOUSE YOUR PAPER. </li></ul><ul><li>Next, ask your spouse how well THEY think they are doing at meeting your needs. Circle their answers on your sheet. </li></ul> When you are done filling out your tool and you share your answers with each other, keep two things in mind. #1: Your spouse is just giving you a number . . . a way to improve. Don’t stress if it’s lower than you thought! It’s just a number, not an indicator of your marriage as a whole. #2: Remember your spouse isn’t responsible for making your marriage glorious . . . you are. Marriage isn’t a 50/50 relationship where we constantly are wondering if our spouse is meeting us in the middle. A fantastic marriage is 100% our responsibility. But we’ll leave the “100 percent Solution for another blog . . . ” May the Lord richly bless your marriage and draw you closer to oneness! Learning with you, Elisha and Katie Voetberg <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/now-that-were-a-family/id1448169027?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Leave Us a Review on ITUNES! </a>

014: His Needs, Her Needs (how we scored each other)

So . . . we’re sharing a life-long dream with you today. Our goal is that these will encourage and help you as much as they have helped us. Thank you for inspiring us to write these, encouraging us through the process, and supporting this dream! You guys are such a blessing!  Click HERE for After the Baby Books!  Love, Elisha and Katie Voetberg P.S. When you receive these, tag us on Instagram, (@nowthatimafather or @nowthatimamother) or send us a photo of you holding them so we can share on our stories! There’s no way we can see on Amazon who purchases these books, and we’d love to personally THANK YOU!!   

So . . . we’re sharing a life-long dream with you today. Our goal is that these will encourage and help you as much as they have helped us. Thank you for inspiring us to write these, encouraging us through the process, and supporting this dream! You guys are such a blessing! <h2><a href="https://nowthatwereafamily.lpages.co/after-the-baby-book/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Click HERE for After the Baby Books! </a></h2> Love, Elisha and Katie Voetberg P.S. When you receive these, tag us on Instagram, (<a href="https://www.instagram.com/nowthatimafather/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">@nowthatimafather</a> or <a href="https://www.instagram.com/nowthatimamother/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">@nowthatimamother</a>) or send us a photo of you holding them so we can share on our stories! There’s no way we can see on Amazon who purchases these books, and we’d love to personally THANK YOU!!

040: Our Biggest Announcement In A Long Time

048: How To Stop Babysitting Your Husband When He Needs A Babysitter

Sometimes we get in a rut of “being married” but not growing in our marriage. And sometimes I like it that way. When marriage is smooth sailing, we often want to avoid digging below the surface because a difficult topic will inevitably get stirred up. But Elisha and I have also found that consistently digging below the surface is a helpful way to minimize long-lasting grudges, or bring issues to light we didn’t even know we had! After asking these questions we found online, our marriage already feels deeper than before. Sure, it was kinda painful in the moment, but it’s comforting to know what your spouse is thinking instead of just wondering, and we’ve come to embrace the process of diving deeper. Below are the questions I asked Elisha on the podcast, and a few bonus ones we didn’t get to. We hope they stir up helpful conversation in your marriage, as they did in ours! Blessings!  Elisha and Katie Voetberg  1. What could I do to make you feel more respected/honored?  2. What Could I do to make you feel more understood? 3. What could I do to make you feel more appreciated? 4. Do you have any big dreams you haven’t shared with me yet? If so, how can I help you achieve them? 5. What is one of your happiest memories of us together? 6. If you could change anything about our marriage, what would it be? 7. What’s your idea of an ideal marriage? 8. Out of our friends and family, who do you think has the best relationship and why? 9. When do you feel most loved by me?  10. Where do you see our relationship in five years? Bonus Questions:   ~ What could I do to make you feel more loved?~ What would you like our sex life to be like?~ Are you Happy?~ Is there anything I can do to make your day easier?

Sometimes we get in a rut of “being married” but not growing in our marriage. And sometimes I like it that way. When marriage is smooth sailing, we often want to avoid digging below the surface because a difficult topic will inevitably get stirred up. But Elisha and I have also found that consistently digging below the surface is a helpful way to minimize long-lasting grudges, or bring issues to light we didn’t even know we had! After asking these questions we found online, our marriage already feels deeper than before. Sure, it was kinda painful in the moment, but it’s comforting to know what your spouse is thinking instead of just wondering, and we’ve come to embrace the process of diving deeper. Below are the questions I asked Elisha on the podcast, and a few bonus ones we didn’t get to. We hope they stir up helpful conversation in your marriage, as they did in ours! Blessings! <h3>Elisha and Katie Voetberg </h3> 1. What could I do to make you feel more respected/honored? 2. What Could I do to make you feel more understood? 3. What could I do to make you feel more appreciated? 4. Do you have any big dreams you haven’t shared with me yet? If so, how can I help you achieve them? 5. What is one of your happiest memories of us together? 6. If you could change anything about our marriage, what would it be? 7. What’s your idea of an ideal marriage? 8. Out of our friends and family, who do you think has the best relationship and why? 9. When do you feel most loved by me? 10. Where do you see our relationship in five years? Bonus Questions: ~ What could I do to make you feel more loved? ~ What would you like our sex life to be like? ~ Are you Happy? ~ Is there anything I can do to make your day easier?

037: Katie Asks Elisha Hard Questions

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