306: 10th Anniversary Special!

Thirsty for some empowerment? We are bringing back some all time highlights so you can stay quenched for quarter 2 of 2023. You’ll get a combination of the most classic and impactful podcast episodes, blogs, and articles in our archives for the next few months.    3 months of timeless insight for life IN TRANSIT!   1 Highlight topic for this quarter on the following:  Raising Kids IN TRANSIT Grief and Resilience Marriage and Partnerships    The Timeless Series is also a tribute to when the IN TRANSIT podcast was formerly known as Expat Happy Hour.   Drum roll…..Here is Timeless Series Marriage and Partnership Highlight 3: You’re Changing But Your Partner Isn’t   This episode focuses on the big question, “What can we do about spouses that just aren’t stepping up?” Maybe not even stepping up to take care of their health. Or being present with the kids. Find out the three steps you can take to make an impact without being a nag or starting a fight. And these strategies don’t just apply to spouses, but will work for anyone you are in relationship with.   Listen to the Full Episode:  Featured: Interested in Adapt and Succeed but want a taste of the program first? Check out the Amuse-Bouche Freebie here.  Sundae’s Website Sundae’s Facebook Business Page – Sundae Schneider-Bean LLC  Sundae Bean – YouTube Adapt and Succeed IN TRANSIT Hub Global Coach Coalition Quiz: Which Phase of Transformation Are You In? 2023 Ambition Compass Challenge  Catch These Podcasts / Articles:  Here is a Blog that really resonated with people of the subject. If you haven’t read it, check it out here: The Love Letter Every International Couple Needs To Read. The spirit of this letter is meant to capture the challenges many individuals go through when they leave their home culture, move abroad and settle in the home country of their partner. Its intention is to start a dialogue about these experiences.    We’re delighted to be in the Top 5 of the global Best 30 Expat Podcasts! Subscribe: iTunes | Android Enjoy The Show?  Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via iTunes or RSS. Please leave us a review in iTunes (or here for Android).  The post Timeless Series: You’re Changing But Your Partner Isn’t appeared first on Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC..

Thirsty for some empowerment? We are bringing back some all time highlights so you can stay quenched for quarter 2 of 2023. You’ll get a combination of the most classic and impactful podcast episodes, blogs, and articles in our archives for the next few months. 3 months of timeless insight for life IN TRANSIT! 1 Highlight topic for this quarter on the following: <ul> <li>Raising Kids IN TRANSIT</li> <li>Grief and Resilience</li> <li>Marriage and Partnerships</li> </ul> The Timeless Series is also a tribute to when the IN TRANSIT podcast was formerly known as Expat Happy Hour. Drum roll…..Here is Timeless Series Marriage and Partnership Highlight 3: You’re Changing But Your Partner Isn’t This episode focuses on the big question, “What can we do about spouses that just aren’t stepping up?” Maybe not even stepping up to take care of their health. Or being present with the kids. Find out the three steps you can take to make an impact without being a nag or starting a fight. And these strategies don’t just apply to spouses, but will work for anyone you are in relationship with. Listen to the Full Episode: <h4>Featured:</h4> Interested in <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/adapt-and-succeed-2/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Adapt and Succeed</a> but want a taste of the program first? Check out the <a href="https://sundaebean.lpages.co/adapt-and-succeed-amuse-bouche/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Amuse-Bouche Freebie here</a>. <ul> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sundae’s Website</a></li> <li>Sundae’s Facebook Business Page –<a href="https://www.facebook.com/SundaeSchneiderBeanLLC/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Sundae Schneider-Bean LLC</a></li> <li> Sundae Bean – <a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPOKNdH-ar1oWRtcpLy5HFA" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">YouTube</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/adapt-and-succeed-2/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Adapt and Succeed</a></li> <li><a href="https://web.facebook.com/groups/intransithub/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">IN TRANSIT Hub</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/global-coach-coalition/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Global Coach Coalition</a></li> <li>Quiz: <a href="https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/61d6a190c195c700180559c2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Which Phase of Transformation Are You In?</a></li> <li><a href="https://sundaebean.lpages.co/2023-ambition-compass-challenge/" rel="noopener nofollow" target="_blank">2023 Ambition Compass Challenge</a></li> </ul> <h4>Catch These Podcasts / Articles:</h4> <ul> <li>Here is a Blog that really resonated with people of the subject. If you haven’t read it, check it out here: <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/2015/11/02/love-letter-international-couple/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">The Love Letter Every International Couple Needs To Read</a>. The spirit of this letter is meant to capture the challenges many individuals go through when they leave their home culture, move abroad and settle in the home country of their partner. Its intention is to start a dialogue about these experiences.</li> </ul> We’re delighted to be in the Top 5 of the global<a href="https://blog.feedspot.com/expat_podcasts/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Best 30 Expat Podcasts</a>! Subscribe: <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> | <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a> Enjoy The Show? <ul> <li>Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> or RSS.</li> <li>Please leave us a review in <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> (or here for <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a>).</li> </ul> The post <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/2023/05/22/timeless-series-youre-changing-but-your-partner-isnt/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Timeless Series: You’re Changing But Your Partner Isn’t</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC.</a>.

Timeless Series: You’re Changing But Your Partner Isn’t

Thirsty for some empowerment? We are bringing back some all time highlights so you can stay quenched for quarter 2 of 2023. You’ll get a combination of the most classic and impactful podcast episodes, blogs, and articles in our archives for the next few months.    3 months of timeless insight for life IN TRANSIT!   1 Highlight topic for this quarter on the following:  Raising Kids IN TRANSIT Grief and Resilience Marriage and Partnerships    The Timeless Series is also a tribute to when the IN TRANSIT podcast was formerly known as Expat Happy Hour.   Drum roll…..Here is Timeless Series Marriage and Partnership Highlight 2: Midlife Marriage Meltdown   Is it your marriage, expat life, a midlife crisis, or all of the above? I welcome psychologist and founder of the Expat Nest, Vivian Chiona, to help us find out. A specialist on the distinct challenges faced by the globally mobile community, Vivian gives us the hard questions to ask before divorce. She also offers reparative and preventative measures for enduring relationship success.   Listen to the Full Episode:  Featured: Interested in Adapt and Succeed but want a taste of the program first? Check out the Amuse-Bouche Freebie here.  Sundae’s Website Sundae’s Facebook Business Page – Sundae Schneider-Bean LLC  Sundae Bean – YouTube Adapt and Succeed IN TRANSIT Hub Global Coach Coalition Quiz: Which Phase of Transformation Are You In? 2023 Ambition Compass Challenge  Catch These Podcasts / Articles:  Here is a Blog that really resonated with people on the subject. If you haven’t read it, check it out here: 3 Warning Signs For The Expat Couple. Relationships are challenging enough, and as an expat couple there are additional demands you have to manage. Watch out for these three warning signs if you are in a relationship where the expat on assignment has a heavy load of responsibility.    We’re delighted to be in the Top 5 of the global Best 30 Expat Podcasts! Subscribe: iTunes | Android Enjoy The Show?  Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via iTunes or RSS. Please leave us a review in iTunes (or here for Android).  The post Timeless Series: Midlife Marriage Meltdown appeared first on Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC..

Thirsty for some empowerment? We are bringing back some all time highlights so you can stay quenched for quarter 2 of 2023. You’ll get a combination of the most classic and impactful podcast episodes, blogs, and articles in our archives for the next few months. 3 months of timeless insight for life IN TRANSIT! 1 Highlight topic for this quarter on the following: <ul> <li>Raising Kids IN TRANSIT</li> <li>Grief and Resilience</li> <li>Marriage and Partnerships</li> </ul> The Timeless Series is also a tribute to when the IN TRANSIT podcast was formerly known as Expat Happy Hour. Drum roll…..Here is Timeless Series Marriage and Partnership Highlight 2: Midlife Marriage Meltdown Is it your marriage, expat life, a midlife crisis, or all of the above? I welcome psychologist and founder of the Expat Nest, Vivian Chiona, to help us find out. A specialist on the distinct challenges faced by the globally mobile community, Vivian gives us the hard questions to ask before divorce. She also offers reparative and preventative measures for enduring relationship success. Listen to the Full Episode: <h4>Featured:</h4> Interested in <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/adapt-and-succeed-2/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Adapt and Succeed</a> but want a taste of the program first? Check out the <a href="https://sundaebean.lpages.co/adapt-and-succeed-amuse-bouche/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Amuse-Bouche Freebie here</a>. <ul> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sundae’s Website</a></li> <li>Sundae’s Facebook Business Page –<a href="https://www.facebook.com/SundaeSchneiderBeanLLC/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Sundae Schneider-Bean LLC</a></li> <li> Sundae Bean – <a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPOKNdH-ar1oWRtcpLy5HFA" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">YouTube</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/adapt-and-succeed-2/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Adapt and Succeed</a></li> <li><a href="https://web.facebook.com/groups/intransithub/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">IN TRANSIT Hub</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/global-coach-coalition/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Global Coach Coalition</a></li> <li>Quiz: <a href="https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/61d6a190c195c700180559c2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Which Phase of Transformation Are You In?</a></li> <li><a href="https://sundaebean.lpages.co/2023-ambition-compass-challenge/" rel="noopener nofollow" target="_blank">2023 Ambition Compass Challenge</a></li> </ul> <h4>Catch These Podcasts / Articles:</h4> <ul> <li>Here is a Blog that really resonated with people on the subject. If you haven’t read it, check it out here: <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/2015/04/14/3-warning-signs-expat-couple/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">3 Warning Signs For The Expat Couple</a>. Relationships are challenging enough, and as an expat couple there are additional demands you have to manage. Watch out for these three warning signs if you are in a relationship where the expat on assignment has a heavy load of responsibility.</li> </ul> We’re delighted to be in the Top 5 of the global<a href="https://blog.feedspot.com/expat_podcasts/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Best 30 Expat Podcasts</a>! Subscribe: <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> | <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a> Enjoy The Show? <ul> <li>Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> or RSS.</li> <li>Please leave us a review in <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> (or here for <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a>).</li> </ul> The post <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/2023/05/15/timeless-series-midlife-marriage-meltdown/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Timeless Series: Midlife Marriage Meltdown</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC.</a>.

Timeless Series: Midlife Marriage Meltdown

Thirsty for some empowerment? We are bringing back some all time highlights so you can stay quenched for quarter 2 of 2023. You’ll get a combination of the most classic and impactful podcast episodes, blogs, and articles in our archives for the next few months.    3 months of timeless insight for life IN TRANSIT!   1 Highlight topic for this quarter on the following:  Raising Kids IN TRANSIT Grief and Resilience Marriage and Partnerships    The Timeless Series is also a tribute to when the IN TRANSIT podcast was formerly known as Expat Happy Hour.   Drum roll…..Here is Timeless Series Marriage and Partnership Highlight 1: Feeling Distant From Your Partner   Look at your life and how you spend your time. Now look at your partner’s. Ever thought, “It’s like we live in different countries!” I get it. And I know that deep down you may worry that these differences could rip you apart. I have got your back – and it is in a totally unexpected way. Check out this game I created for you that will help you not only have a little fun but also bridge the divide so you can create more connection and understanding.   Listen to the Full Episode:  Featured: Interested in Adapt and Succeed but want a taste of the program first? Check out the Amuse-Bouche Freebie here.  Sundae’s Website Sundae’s Facebook Business Page – Sundae Schneider-Bean LLC  Sundae Bean – YouTube Adapt and Succeed IN TRANSIT Hub Global Coach Coalition Quiz: Which Phase of Transformation Are You In? 2023 Ambition Compass Challenge  Catch These Podcasts / Articles:  Here is a Blog that really resonated with people on the subject. If you haven’t read it, check it out here: When You Feel A “Big Talk” Coming On, Do This First. One of those “big talks” with your partner – or someone important to you – may very well be on the horizon. That is why I share a process with you that´ll leave you feeling a little more grounded, better understood, and much more in control of your life. This is your go-to-guide the next time you feel a “big talk” coming on.    We’re delighted to be in the Top 5 of the global Best 30 Expat Podcasts! Subscribe: iTunes | Android Enjoy The Show?  Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via iTunes or RSS. Please leave us a review in iTunes (or here for Android).  The post Timeless Series: Marriage and Partnership appeared first on Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC..

Thirsty for some empowerment? We are bringing back some all time highlights so you can stay quenched for quarter 2 of 2023. You’ll get a combination of the most classic and impactful podcast episodes, blogs, and articles in our archives for the next few months. 3 months of timeless insight for life IN TRANSIT! 1 Highlight topic for this quarter on the following: <ul> <li>Raising Kids IN TRANSIT</li> <li>Grief and Resilience</li> <li>Marriage and Partnerships</li> </ul> The Timeless Series is also a tribute to when the IN TRANSIT podcast was formerly known as Expat Happy Hour. Drum roll…..Here is Timeless Series Marriage and Partnership Highlight 1: Feeling Distant From Your Partner Look at your life and how you spend your time. Now look at your partner’s. Ever thought, “It’s like we live in different countries!” I get it. And I know that deep down you may worry that these differences could rip you apart. I have got your back – and it is in a totally unexpected way. Check out this game I created for you that will help you not only have a little fun but also bridge the divide so you can create more connection and understanding. Listen to the Full Episode: <h4>Featured:</h4> Interested in <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/adapt-and-succeed-2/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Adapt and Succeed</a> but want a taste of the program first? Check out the <a href="https://sundaebean.lpages.co/adapt-and-succeed-amuse-bouche/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Amuse-Bouche Freebie here</a>. <ul> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sundae’s Website</a></li> <li>Sundae’s Facebook Business Page –<a href="https://www.facebook.com/SundaeSchneiderBeanLLC/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Sundae Schneider-Bean LLC</a></li> <li> Sundae Bean – <a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPOKNdH-ar1oWRtcpLy5HFA" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">YouTube</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/adapt-and-succeed-2/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Adapt and Succeed</a></li> <li><a href="https://web.facebook.com/groups/intransithub/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">IN TRANSIT Hub</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/global-coach-coalition/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Global Coach Coalition</a></li> <li>Quiz: <a href="https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/61d6a190c195c700180559c2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Which Phase of Transformation Are You In?</a></li> <li><a href="https://sundaebean.lpages.co/2023-ambition-compass-challenge/" rel="noopener nofollow" target="_blank">2023 Ambition Compass Challenge</a></li> </ul> <h4>Catch These Podcasts / Articles:</h4> <ul> <li>Here is a Blog that really resonated with people on the subject. If you haven’t read it, check it out here: <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/2015/11/16/before-the-big-talk/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">When You Feel A “Big Talk” Coming On, Do This First. One of those “big talks” with your partner</a> – or someone important to you – may very well be on the horizon. That is why I share a process with you that´ll leave you feeling a little more grounded, better understood, and much more in control of your life. This is your go-to-guide the next time you feel a “big talk” coming on.</li> </ul> We’re delighted to be in the Top 5 of the global<a href="https://blog.feedspot.com/expat_podcasts/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Best 30 Expat Podcasts</a>! Subscribe: <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> | <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a> Enjoy The Show? <ul> <li>Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> or RSS.</li> <li>Please leave us a review in <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> (or here for <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a>).</li> </ul> The post <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/2023/05/08/timeless-series-marriage-and-partnership-1/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Timeless Series: Marriage and Partnership</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC.</a>.

Timeless Series: Marriage and Partnership

Thirsty for some empowerment? We are bringing back some all time highlights so you can stay quenched for quarter 2 of 2023. You’ll get a combination of the most classic and impactful podcast episodes, blogs, and articles in our archives for the next few months.    3 months of timeless insight for life IN TRANSIT!   1 Highlight topic for this quarter on the following:  Raising Kids IN TRANSIT Grief and Resilience Marriage and Partnerships    The Timeless Series is also a tribute to when the IN TRANSIT podcast was formerly known as Expat Happy Hour.   Drum roll…..Here is Timeless Series Resilience and Burnout Highlight 3: Simplified Self-Care   This episode is for the carers out there – the tired teachers, parents, health and wellness professionals, entrepreneurs… I see you, and I’ve come with fierce reinforcements. Dr. Tiessen discusses the harm caused from self-neglect, and shares her expert tips for easy, creative, and playful ways to add self-care into our daily routine.   Listen to the Full Episode:  Featured: Interested in Adapt and Succeed but want a taste of the program first? Check out the Amuse-Bouche Freebie here.  Sundae’s Website Sundae’s Facebook Business Page – Sundae Schneider-Bean LLC  Sundae Bean – YouTube Adapt and Succeed IN TRANSIT Hub Global Coach Coalition Quiz: Which Phase of Transformation Are You In? 2023 Ambition Compass Challenge  Catch These Podcasts / Articles:  Expat Resilience: Avoiding The Breaking Point. It has been established in the research that those with resilience are able to perform better and be happier than those with lower resilience. Sounds promising but what do we really mean when we talk about resilience?    We’re delighted to be in the Top 5 of the global Best 30 Expat Podcasts! Subscribe: iTunes | Android Enjoy The Show?  Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via iTunes or RSS. Please leave us a review in iTunes (or here for Android).  The post Timeless Series: Simplified Self-Care appeared first on Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC..

Thirsty for some empowerment? We are bringing back some all time highlights so you can stay quenched for quarter 2 of 2023. You’ll get a combination of the most classic and impactful podcast episodes, blogs, and articles in our archives for the next few months. 3 months of timeless insight for life IN TRANSIT! 1 Highlight topic for this quarter on the following: <ul> <li>Raising Kids IN TRANSIT</li> <li>Grief and Resilience</li> <li>Marriage and Partnerships</li> </ul> The Timeless Series is also a tribute to when the IN TRANSIT podcast was formerly known as Expat Happy Hour. Drum roll…..Here is Timeless Series Resilience and Burnout Highlight 3: Simplified Self-Care This episode is for the carers out there – the tired teachers, parents, health and wellness professionals, entrepreneurs… I see you, and I’ve come with fierce reinforcements. Dr. Tiessen discusses the harm caused from self-neglect, and shares her expert tips for easy, creative, and playful ways to add self-care into our daily routine. Listen to the Full Episode: <h4>Featured:</h4> Interested in <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/adapt-and-succeed-2/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Adapt and Succeed</a> but want a taste of the program first? Check out the <a href="https://sundaebean.lpages.co/adapt-and-succeed-amuse-bouche/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Amuse-Bouche Freebie here</a>. <ul> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sundae’s Website</a></li> <li>Sundae’s Facebook Business Page –<a href="https://www.facebook.com/SundaeSchneiderBeanLLC/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Sundae Schneider-Bean LLC</a></li> <li> Sundae Bean – <a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPOKNdH-ar1oWRtcpLy5HFA" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">YouTube</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/adapt-and-succeed-2/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Adapt and Succeed</a></li> <li><a href="https://web.facebook.com/groups/intransithub/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">IN TRANSIT Hub</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/global-coach-coalition/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Global Coach Coalition</a></li> <li>Quiz: <a href="https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/61d6a190c195c700180559c2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Which Phase of Transformation Are You In?</a></li> <li><a href="https://sundaebean.lpages.co/2023-ambition-compass-challenge/" rel="noopener nofollow" target="_blank">2023 Ambition Compass Challenge</a></li> </ul> <h4>Catch These Podcasts / Articles:</h4> <ul> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/2014/02/19/avoiding-the-breaking-point/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Expat Resilience: Avoiding The Breaking Point</a>. It has been established in the research that those with resilience are able to perform better and be happier than those with lower resilience. Sounds promising but what do we really mean when we talk about resilience?</li> </ul> We’re delighted to be in the Top 5 of the global<a href="https://blog.feedspot.com/expat_podcasts/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Best 30 Expat Podcasts</a>! Subscribe: <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> | <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a> Enjoy The Show? <ul> <li>Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> or RSS.</li> <li>Please leave us a review in <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> (or here for <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a>).</li> </ul> The post <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/2023/04/24/timeless-series-simplified-self-care/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Timeless Series: Simplified Self-Care</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC.</a>.

Timeless Series: Simplified Self-Care

Thirsty for some empowerment? We are bringing back some all time highlights so you can stay quenched for quarter 2 of 2023. You’ll get a combination of the most classic and impactful podcast episodes, blogs, and articles in our archives for the next few months.    3 months of timeless insight for life IN TRANSIT!   1 Highlight topic for this quarter on the following:  Raising Kids IN TRANSIT Grief and Resilience Marriage and Partnerships    The Timeless Series is also a tribute to when the IN TRANSIT podcast was formerly known as Expat Happy Hour.   Drum roll…..Here is Timeless Series Resilience and Burnout Highlight 2: Standing on The Sidelines of Your Life?   Somewhere along the way, we stop and realise that we are no longer on track but are just hustling to get by. To tick off lists. No longer doing anything for ourselves, nothing for joy.   It is time to stop the other’s priorities merry-go-round and start living your life with more purpose. Use these ten signs to step back into who you are and everyone will benefit as you reclaim a full, fun and satisfying life.   Listen to the Full Episode:  Featured: Interested in Adapt and Succeed but want a taste of the program first? Check out the Amuse-Bouche Freebie here.  Sundae’s Website Sundae’s Facebook Business Page – Sundae Schneider-Bean LLC  Sundae Bean – YouTube Adapt and Succeed IN TRANSIT Hub Global Coach Coalition Quiz: Which Phase of Transformation Are You In? 2023 Ambition Compass Challenge  Catch These Podcasts / Articles:    Here is a Blog that resonated with people on the subject. If you haven’t read it, check it out here:: One Way To Trick Fear. It isn´t always rational (unless you are left in a room alone with a rabid tiger). But fear´s positive intention is to protect us. The disturbing thing is our body´s response to it can actually be the same, whether the thing that scares us is real or imagined. You know the game: fight or flight, and in this case my good buddy – freeze.      We’re delighted to be in the Top 5 of the global Best 30 Expat Podcasts! Subscribe: iTunes | Android Enjoy The Show?  Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via iTunes or RSS. Please leave us a review in iTunes (or here for Android).  The post Timeless Series: Standing on The Sidelines of Your Life? appeared first on Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC..

Thirsty for some empowerment? We are bringing back some all time highlights so you can stay quenched for quarter 2 of 2023. You’ll get a combination of the most classic and impactful podcast episodes, blogs, and articles in our archives for the next few months. 3 months of timeless insight for life IN TRANSIT! 1 Highlight topic for this quarter on the following: <ul> <li>Raising Kids IN TRANSIT</li> <li>Grief and Resilience</li> <li>Marriage and Partnerships</li> </ul> The Timeless Series is also a tribute to when the IN TRANSIT podcast was formerly known as Expat Happy Hour. Drum roll…..Here is Timeless Series Resilience and Burnout Highlight 2: Standing on The Sidelines of Your Life? Somewhere along the way, we stop and realise that we are no longer on track but are just hustling to get by. To tick off lists. No longer doing anything for ourselves, nothing for joy. It is time to stop the other’s priorities merry-go-round and start living your life with more purpose. Use these ten signs to step back into who you are and everyone will benefit as you reclaim a full, fun and satisfying life. Listen to the Full Episode: <h4>Featured:</h4> Interested in <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/adapt-and-succeed-2/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Adapt and Succeed</a> but want a taste of the program first? Check out the <a href="https://sundaebean.lpages.co/adapt-and-succeed-amuse-bouche/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Amuse-Bouche Freebie here</a>. <ul> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sundae’s Website</a></li> <li>Sundae’s Facebook Business Page –<a href="https://www.facebook.com/SundaeSchneiderBeanLLC/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Sundae Schneider-Bean LLC</a></li> <li> Sundae Bean – <a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPOKNdH-ar1oWRtcpLy5HFA" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">YouTube</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/adapt-and-succeed-2/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Adapt and Succeed</a></li> <li><a href="https://web.facebook.com/groups/intransithub/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">IN TRANSIT Hub</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/global-coach-coalition/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Global Coach Coalition</a></li> <li>Quiz: <a href="https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/61d6a190c195c700180559c2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Which Phase of Transformation Are You In?</a></li> <li><a href="https://sundaebean.lpages.co/2023-ambition-compass-challenge/" rel="noopener nofollow" target="_blank">2023 Ambition Compass Challenge</a></li> </ul> <h4>Catch These Podcasts / Articles:</h4> <ul> <li> <ul> <li>Here is a Blog that resonated with people on the subject. If you haven’t read it, check it out here:: <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/2015/05/07/one-way-trick-fear/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">One Way To Trick Fear</a>. It isn´t always rational (unless you are left in a room alone with a rabid tiger). But fear´s positive intention is to protect us. The disturbing thing is our body´s response to it can actually be the same, whether the thing that scares us is real or imagined. You know the game: fight or flight, and in this case my good buddy – freeze.</li> </ul> </li> </ul> We’re delighted to be in the Top 5 of the global<a href="https://blog.feedspot.com/expat_podcasts/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Best 30 Expat Podcasts</a>! Subscribe: <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> | <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a> Enjoy The Show? <ul> <li>Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> or RSS.</li> <li>Please leave us a review in <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> (or here for <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a>).</li> </ul> The post <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/2023/04/17/timeless-series-standing-on-the-sidelines-of-your-life/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Timeless Series: Standing on The Sidelines of Your Life?</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC.</a>.

Timeless Series: Standing on The Sidelines of Your Life?

Thirsty for some empowerment? We are bringing back some all time highlights so you can stay quenched for quarter 2 of 2023. You’ll get a combination of the most classic and impactful podcast episodes, blogs, and articles in our archives for the next few months.    3 months of timeless insight for life IN TRANSIT!   1 Highlight topic for this quarter on the following:  Raising Kids IN TRANSIT Grief and Resilience Marriage and Partnerships    The Timeless Series is also a tribute to when the IN TRANSIT podcast was formerly known as Expat Happy Hour.   Drum roll…..Here is Timeless Series Resilience and Burnout Highlight 1: Why You Should Talk About Grief.   Grief is tough enough. Add being part of an intercultural family or navigating a globally-mobile life and it gets even more complicated. When loss strikes, no one wants to also manage unexpected guilt or feel unprepared when confronted with cultural expectations that are completely different from your own. This podcast which explores four phases that can help uncomplicate the impact of loss when it strikes so that you can focus on what is most important. Listen to the Full Episode:  Featured: Interested in Adapt and Succeed but want a taste of the program first? Check out the Amuse-Bouche Freebie here.  Sundae’s Website Sundae’s Facebook Business Page – Sundae Schneider-Bean LLC  Sundae Bean – YouTube Adapt and Succeed IN TRANSIT Hub Global Coach Coalition Quiz: Which Phase of Transformation Are You In? 2023 Ambition Compass Challenge  Catch These Podcasts / Articles:  Here is a Blog that resonated with people on the subject. If you haven’t read it, check it out here: Wallow In Your Misery During Change. In this blog, I introduce a 3-part process which is designed to help you splash about in the mud of discontent so you can bring about real change and end the sting of agony. I will begin by introducing three simple components of good wallowing: observe – serve – unwrap. Each is illustrated with examples from my own life so you can see what they look like in action.    We’re delighted to be in the Top 5 of the global Best 30 Expat Podcasts! Subscribe: iTunes | Android Enjoy The Show?  Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via iTunes or RSS. Please leave us a review in iTunes (or here for Android).  The post Timeless Series: Why You Should Talk About Grief. appeared first on Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC..

Thirsty for some empowerment? We are bringing back some all time highlights so you can stay quenched for quarter 2 of 2023. You’ll get a combination of the most classic and impactful podcast episodes, blogs, and articles in our archives for the next few months. 3 months of timeless insight for life IN TRANSIT! 1 Highlight topic for this quarter on the following: <ul> <li>Raising Kids IN TRANSIT</li> <li>Grief and Resilience</li> <li>Marriage and Partnerships</li> </ul> The Timeless Series is also a tribute to when the IN TRANSIT podcast was formerly known as Expat Happy Hour. Drum roll…..Here is Timeless Series Resilience and Burnout Highlight 1: Why You Should Talk About Grief. Grief is tough enough. Add being part of an intercultural family or navigating a globally-mobile life and it gets even more complicated. When loss strikes, no one wants to also manage unexpected guilt or feel unprepared when confronted with cultural expectations that are completely different from your own. This podcast which explores four phases that can help uncomplicate the impact of loss when it strikes so that you can focus on what is most important. Listen to the Full Episode: <h4>Featured:</h4> Interested in <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/adapt-and-succeed-2/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Adapt and Succeed</a> but want a taste of the program first? Check out the <a href="https://sundaebean.lpages.co/adapt-and-succeed-amuse-bouche/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Amuse-Bouche Freebie here</a>. <ul> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sundae’s Website</a></li> <li>Sundae’s Facebook Business Page –<a href="https://www.facebook.com/SundaeSchneiderBeanLLC/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Sundae Schneider-Bean LLC</a></li> <li> Sundae Bean – <a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPOKNdH-ar1oWRtcpLy5HFA" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">YouTube</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/adapt-and-succeed-2/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Adapt and Succeed</a></li> <li><a href="https://web.facebook.com/groups/intransithub/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">IN TRANSIT Hub</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/global-coach-coalition/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Global Coach Coalition</a></li> <li>Quiz: <a href="https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/61d6a190c195c700180559c2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Which Phase of Transformation Are You In?</a></li> <li><a href="https://sundaebean.lpages.co/2023-ambition-compass-challenge/" rel="noopener nofollow" target="_blank">2023 Ambition Compass Challenge</a></li> </ul> <h4>Catch These Podcasts / Articles:</h4> <ul> <li>Here is a Blog that resonated with people on the subject. If you haven’t read it, check it out here: <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/2013/10/25/wallow-in-your-misery/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Wallow In Your Misery During Change</a>. In this blog, I introduce a 3-part process which is designed to help you splash about in the mud of discontent so you can bring about real change and end the sting of agony. I will begin by introducing three simple components of good wallowing: observe – serve – unwrap. Each is illustrated with examples from my own life so you can see what they look like in action.</li> </ul> We’re delighted to be in the Top 5 of the global<a href="https://blog.feedspot.com/expat_podcasts/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Best 30 Expat Podcasts</a>! Subscribe: <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> | <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a> Enjoy The Show? <ul> <li>Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> or RSS.</li> <li>Please leave us a review in <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> (or here for <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a>).</li> </ul> The post <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/2023/04/12/timeless-series-why-you-should-talk-about-grief/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Timeless Series: Why You Should Talk About Grief.</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC.</a>.

Timeless Series: Why You Should Talk About Grief.

Thirsty for some empowerment? We are bringing back some all time highlights so you can stay quenched for quarter 2 of 2023. You’ll get a combination of the most classic and impactful podcast episodes, blogs, and articles in our archives for the next few months.    3 months of timeless insight for life IN TRANSIT!   1 Highlight topic for this quarter on the following:  Raising Kids IN TRANSIT Grief and Resilience Marriage and Partnerships    The Timeless Series is also a tribute to when the IN TRANSIT podcast was formerly known as Expat Happy Hour.   Drum roll…..Here is Timeless Series Raising Kids IN TRANSIT Highlight 3: Am I Spoiling My Kids?   Overindulgence isn’t just about the families who give too much ice cream. Overindulgence includes a broad spectrum, from allowing too much of anything, to over nurturing or simply having too soft of structures. According to the experts, overindulgence is a form of child neglect. What?! Yes, read on.   Thanks to the decades of research from today’s guest, Dr David Bredehoft, and his associates, Dr Connie Dawson and Jean illsley Clarke, parents who are committed to doing the right thing are not alone. Listen to today’s podcast to walk away with ten essential steps to gain more clarity on what counts as overindulgence and how to better allow your child to achieve their full potential.   Listen to the Full Episode:  Featured: Interested in Adapt and Succeed but want a taste of the program first? Check out the Amuse-Bouche Freebie here.  Sundae’s Website Sundae’s Facebook Business Page – Sundae Schneider-Bean LLC  Sundae Bean – YouTube Adapt and Succeed IN TRANSIT Hub Global Coach Coalition Quiz: Which Phase of Transformation Are You In? 2023 Ambition Compass Challenge  Catch These Podcasts / Articles:  Here is a Blog that resonated with people on the subject. If you haven’t read it, check it out here: Getting Comfortable With Change Pains: In this Blog, I want to help you make it through the transition you are currently facing so you have more energy, greater joy and less stress. Interested? Spontaneously answer the questions below. Don´t analyze or judge. Just respond with what first pops into mind.    We’re delighted to be in the Top 5 of the global Best 30 Expat Podcasts! Subscribe: iTunes | Android Enjoy The Show?  Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via iTunes or RSS. Please leave us a review in iTunes (or here for Android).  The post Timeless Series: Am I Spoiling My Kids? appeared first on Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC..

Thirsty for some empowerment? We are bringing back some all time highlights so you can stay quenched for quarter 2 of 2023. You’ll get a combination of the most classic and impactful podcast episodes, blogs, and articles in our archives for the next few months. 3 months of timeless insight for life IN TRANSIT! 1 Highlight topic for this quarter on the following: <ul> <li>Raising Kids IN TRANSIT</li> <li>Grief and Resilience</li> <li>Marriage and Partnerships</li> </ul> The Timeless Series is also a tribute to when the IN TRANSIT podcast was formerly known as Expat Happy Hour. Drum roll…..Here is Timeless Series Raising Kids IN TRANSIT Highlight 3: Am I Spoiling My Kids? Overindulgence isn’t just about the families who give too much ice cream. Overindulgence includes a broad spectrum, from allowing too much of anything, to over nurturing or simply having too soft of structures. According to the experts, overindulgence is a form of child neglect. What?! Yes, read on. Thanks to the decades of research from today’s guest, Dr David Bredehoft, and his associates, Dr Connie Dawson and Jean illsley Clarke, parents who are committed to doing the right thing are not alone. Listen to today’s podcast to walk away with ten essential steps to gain more clarity on what counts as overindulgence and how to better allow your child to achieve their full potential. Listen to the Full Episode: <h4>Featured:</h4> Interested in <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/adapt-and-succeed-2/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Adapt and Succeed</a> but want a taste of the program first? Check out the <a href="https://sundaebean.lpages.co/adapt-and-succeed-amuse-bouche/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Amuse-Bouche Freebie here</a>. <ul> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sundae’s Website</a></li> <li>Sundae’s Facebook Business Page –<a href="https://www.facebook.com/SundaeSchneiderBeanLLC/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Sundae Schneider-Bean LLC</a></li> <li> Sundae Bean – <a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPOKNdH-ar1oWRtcpLy5HFA" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">YouTube</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/adapt-and-succeed-2/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Adapt and Succeed</a></li> <li><a href="https://web.facebook.com/groups/intransithub/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">IN TRANSIT Hub</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/global-coach-coalition/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Global Coach Coalition</a></li> <li>Quiz: <a href="https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/61d6a190c195c700180559c2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Which Phase of Transformation Are You In?</a></li> <li><a href="https://sundaebean.lpages.co/2023-ambition-compass-challenge/" rel="noopener nofollow" target="_blank">2023 Ambition Compass Challenge</a></li> </ul> <h4>Catch These Podcasts / Articles:</h4> <ul> <li>Here is a Blog that resonated with people on the subject. If you haven’t read it, check it out here: <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/2013/09/25/change-pains/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Getting Comfortable With Change Pains</a>: In this Blog, I want to help you make it through the transition you are currently facing so you have more energy, greater joy and less stress. Interested? Spontaneously answer the questions below. Don´t analyze or judge. Just respond with what first pops into mind.</li> </ul> We’re delighted to be in the Top 5 of the global<a href="https://blog.feedspot.com/expat_podcasts/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Best 30 Expat Podcasts</a>! Subscribe: <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> | <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a> Enjoy The Show? <ul> <li>Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> or RSS.</li> <li>Please leave us a review in <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> (or here for <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a>).</li> </ul> The post <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/2023/04/03/timeless-series-am-i-spoiling-my-kids/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Timeless Series: Am I Spoiling My Kids?</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC.</a>.

Timeless Series: Am I Spoiling My Kids?

Ruth Van Reken

Thirsty for some empowerment? We are bringing back some all time highlights so you can stay quenched for quarter 2 of 2023. You’ll get a combination of the most classic and impactful podcast episodes, blogs, and articles in our archives for the next few months.    3 months of timeless insight for life IN TRANSIT!   1 Highlight topic for this quarter on the following:  Raising Kids IN TRANSIT Grief and Resilience Marriage and Partnerships    The Timeless Series is also a tribute to when the IN TRANSIT podcast was formerly known as Expat Happy Hour.   Drum roll…..Here is Timeless Series Raising Kids IN TRANSIT Highlight 2: Grief And Guilt Raising Tcks With Ruth Van Reken.   By raising our kids cross-culturally, we are creating children who can move towards those who might seem different but with whom they can find meaningful commonalities. This is just one gift of a cross-cultural life.   If you are raising your children abroad, chances are you’ve heard the term Third Culture Kid. If you haven’t, you will want to pay extra close attention. If you have, this episode has something brand new for you.   Together with this podcast’s special guest Dr. Ruth van Reken, co-author of the book Third Culture Kids: Growing Up Among Worlds, we explore grief, guilt, and identity as well as the pride and absolute joys of raising our children abroad. If you think you’ve heard this all before, wait: we cover new territory.   Listen to the Full Episode:  Featured: Interested in Adapt and Succeed but want a taste of the program first? Check out the Amuse-Bouche Freebie here.  Sundae’s Website Sundae’s Facebook Business Page – Sundae Schneider-Bean LLC  Sundae Bean – YouTube Adapt and Succeed IN TRANSIT Hub Global Coach Coalition Quiz: Which Phase of Transformation Are You In? 2023 Ambition Compass Challenge  Catch These Podcasts / Articles:  Here is a Blog that really resonated with people of the subject. If you haven’t read it, check it out here –  The Struggle With The Question “Where Is Home?”: When you meet someone new and you’re an expat, the question often comes up, “So, where´s home?” The innocent person who asks this may not even know how this question triggers an internal dilemma. But if you´re an expat, or someone whose heart and story is increasingly being divided into pieces, “home” simply resides in more than one place.  We’re delighted to be in the Top 5 of the global Best 30 Expat Podcasts! Subscribe: iTunes | Android Enjoy The Show?  Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via iTunes or RSS. Please leave us a review in iTunes (or here for Android).  The post Timeless Series: Grief And Guilt Raising TCKs With Ruth Van Reken appeared first on Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC..

Thirsty for some empowerment? We are bringing back some all time highlights so you can stay quenched for quarter 2 of 2023. You’ll get a combination of the most classic and impactful podcast episodes, blogs, and articles in our archives for the next few months. 3 months of timeless insight for life IN TRANSIT! 1 Highlight topic for this quarter on the following: <ul> <li>Raising Kids IN TRANSIT</li> <li>Grief and Resilience</li> <li>Marriage and Partnerships</li> </ul> The Timeless Series is also a tribute to when the IN TRANSIT podcast was formerly known as Expat Happy Hour. Drum roll…..Here is Timeless Series Raising Kids IN TRANSIT Highlight 2: Grief And Guilt Raising Tcks With Ruth Van Reken. By raising our kids cross-culturally, we are creating children who can move towards those who might seem different but with whom they can find meaningful commonalities. This is just one gift of a cross-cultural life. If you are raising your children abroad, chances are you’ve heard the term Third Culture Kid. If you haven’t, you will want to pay extra close attention. If you have, this episode has something brand new for you. Together with this podcast’s special guest Dr. Ruth van Reken, co-author of the book Third Culture Kids: Growing Up Among Worlds, we explore grief, guilt, and identity as well as the pride and absolute joys of raising our children abroad. If you think you’ve heard this all before, wait: we cover new territory. Listen to the Full Episode: <h4>Featured:</h4> Interested in <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/adapt-and-succeed-2/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Adapt and Succeed</a> but want a taste of the program first? Check out the <a href="https://sundaebean.lpages.co/adapt-and-succeed-amuse-bouche/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Amuse-Bouche Freebie here</a>. <ul> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sundae’s Website</a></li> <li>Sundae’s Facebook Business Page –<a href="https://www.facebook.com/SundaeSchneiderBeanLLC/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Sundae Schneider-Bean LLC</a></li> <li> Sundae Bean – <a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPOKNdH-ar1oWRtcpLy5HFA" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">YouTube</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/adapt-and-succeed-2/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Adapt and Succeed</a></li> <li><a href="https://web.facebook.com/groups/intransithub/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">IN TRANSIT Hub</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/global-coach-coalition/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Global Coach Coalition</a></li> <li>Quiz: <a href="https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/61d6a190c195c700180559c2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Which Phase of Transformation Are You In?</a></li> <li><a href="https://sundaebean.lpages.co/2023-ambition-compass-challenge/" rel="noopener nofollow" target="_blank">2023 Ambition Compass Challenge</a></li> </ul> <h4>Catch These Podcasts / Articles:</h4> <ul> <li>Here is a Blog that really resonated with people of the subject. If you haven’t read it, check it out here –  <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/2015/07/14/no-easy-answer-to-where-is-home/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">The Struggle With The Question “Where Is Home?”</a>: When you meet someone new and you’re an expat, the question often comes up, “So, where´s home?” The innocent person who asks this may not even know how this question triggers an internal dilemma. But if you´re an expat, or someone whose heart and story is increasingly being divided into pieces, “home” simply resides in more than one place.</li> </ul> We’re delighted to be in the Top 5 of the global<a href="https://blog.feedspot.com/expat_podcasts/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Best 30 Expat Podcasts</a>! Subscribe: <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> | <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a> Enjoy The Show? <ul> <li>Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> or RSS.</li> <li>Please leave us a review in <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> (or here for <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a>).</li> </ul> The post <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/2023/03/27/timeless-series-raising-kids-in-transit-hightlight-2/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Timeless Series: Grief And Guilt Raising TCKs With Ruth Van Reken</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC.</a>.

Timeless Series: Grief And Guilt Raising TCKs With Ruth Van Reken

Thirsty for some empowerment? We are bringing back some all time highlights so you can stay quenched for quarter 2 of 2023. You’ll get a combination of the most classic and impactful podcast episodes, blogs, and articles in our archives for the next few months.    3 months  of timeless insight for life IN TRANSIT!   1 Highlight topic for this quarter on the following:  Raising Kids IN TRANSIT Grief and Resilience Marriage and Partnerships    The Timeless Series is also a tribute to when the IN TRANSIT podcast was formerly known as Expat Happy Hour.   Drum roll…..Here is Timeless Series Raising Kids IN TRANSIT Highlight 1: Chat with My TCKs.   My favorite conversation with my boys!  Listen to the Full Episode:  Featured: XPath, one of our relocation partners just released an App where you can get access to Adapt and Succeed services right from your phone in whatever region you are moving to. Check it out here.  Sundae’s Website Sundae’s Facebook Business Page – Sundae Schneider-Bean LLC  Sundae Bean – YouTube Adapt and Succeed IN TRANSIT Hub Global Coach Coalition Quiz: Which Phase of Transformation Are You In? 2023 Ambition Compass Challenge  Catch These Podcasts / Articles:  Here is a Blog that really resonated with people of the subject. If you haven’t read it, check it out here – 6 Things We Tell Our Kids But Don’t Do Ourselves: All too often we fail to show up in our own lives the way we expect our children to. Take a closer look at this list, check in on whether you are following your own advice, and try out one of my challenges.  We’re delighted to be in the Top 5 of the global Best 30 Expat Podcasts! Subscribe: iTunes | Android Enjoy The Show?  Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via iTunes or RSS. Please leave us a review in iTunes (or here for Android).  The post Timeless Series: Chat with My TCKs appeared first on Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC..

Thirsty for some empowerment? We are bringing back some all time highlights so you can stay quenched for quarter 2 of 2023. You’ll get a combination of the most classic and impactful podcast episodes, blogs, and articles in our archives for the next few months. 3 months  of timeless insight for life IN TRANSIT! 1 Highlight topic for this quarter on the following: <ul> <li>Raising Kids IN TRANSIT</li> <li>Grief and Resilience</li> <li>Marriage and Partnerships</li> </ul> The Timeless Series is also a tribute to when the IN TRANSIT podcast was formerly known as Expat Happy Hour. Drum roll…..Here is Timeless Series Raising Kids IN TRANSIT Highlight 1: Chat with My TCKs. My favorite conversation with my boys! <h4></h4> <h4>Listen to the Full Episode:</h4> <h4>Featured:</h4> <a href="https://xpath.global/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">XPath</a>, one of our relocation partners just released an App where you can get access to Adapt and Succeed services right from your phone in whatever region you are moving to. <a href="https://bit.ly/m/xpathglobal" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Check it out here</a>. <ul> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sundae’s Website</a></li> <li>Sundae’s Facebook Business Page –<a href="https://www.facebook.com/SundaeSchneiderBeanLLC/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Sundae Schneider-Bean LLC</a></li> <li> Sundae Bean – <a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPOKNdH-ar1oWRtcpLy5HFA" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">YouTube</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/adapt-and-succeed-2/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Adapt and Succeed</a></li> <li><a href="https://web.facebook.com/groups/intransithub/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">IN TRANSIT Hub</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/global-coach-coalition/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Global Coach Coalition</a></li> <li>Quiz: <a href="https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/61d6a190c195c700180559c2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Which Phase of Transformation Are You In?</a></li> <li><a href="https://sundaebean.lpages.co/2023-ambition-compass-challenge/" rel="noopener nofollow" target="_blank">2023 Ambition Compass Challenge</a></li> </ul> <h4>Catch These Podcasts / Articles:</h4> <ul> <li>Here is a Blog that really resonated with people of the subject. If you haven’t read it, check it out here – <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/2015/09/08/back-to-school-things-we-tell-our-kids-but-dont-do/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">6 Things We Tell Our Kids But Don’t Do Ourselves</a>: All too often we fail to show up in our own lives the way we expect our children to. Take a closer look at this list, check in on whether you are following your own advice, and try out one of my challenges.</li> </ul> We’re delighted to be in the Top 5 of the global<a href="https://blog.feedspot.com/expat_podcasts/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"> Best 30 Expat Podcasts</a>! Subscribe: <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> | <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a> Enjoy The Show? <ul> <li>Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> or RSS.</li> <li>Please leave us a review in <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> (or here for <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a>).</li> </ul> The post <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/2023/03/22/timeless-series-raising-kids-in-transit/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Timeless Series: Chat with My TCKs</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC.</a>.

Timeless Series: Chat with My TCKs

Steady advice in an unsteady world. Funny and heartfelt, this weekly podcast draws on the realities of life transitions. Rated Top 5% globally for five years and counting, you can trust IN TRANSIT with Sundae Bean to support you through Ambitious Transformation regardless of what life slings at you.

Sometimes solo, sometimes with experts from a wide range of fields but always somehow relevant to Expat life. Sometimes mobility specific, sometimes personal development oriented but always entertaining, informative and over too soon. A must listen to!

Best podcast for global mobility & life challenges

I&#39;ve learned so much from Sundae&#39;s podcast--about how to thrive as an expat, but so much of her advice is helpful even if you&#39;ve never set foot outside your home country. She and I share similar backgrounds--growing up in rural mid-America, finding love abroad and now raising cross-cultural kids--so I feel like she really speaks directly to my challenges living oversees. Thanks, Sundae!

Sundae has saved my expat life!

IN TRANSIT with Sundae Bean

159: Bending Reality

116: Breaking Through The Stay Or Go Dilemma

136: The Sad Tagalong Spouse?

126: What Every International School Counsellor Wishes You Knew

There are times in your life when you’re on a passionate journey to uplevel your life, when you suddenly realise that your partner is being left behind. No matter how hard you’d like to ignore it, they are just not in the same space as us. What can you do if you’re making big changes in your parenting approach, your health or your routines but your partner just isn’t? The truth is you really cannot change anyone else, you have to make the change yourself. In today’s episode, I’m showing you three steps to take back control when you’re afraid  your partner won’t step up. What You’ll Discover in this Episode:    How to communicate so that what you’re saying sinks in. What to focus on first. When to step in.    This dilemma is exactly what one of my clients has recently been through and, to be honest, she is not alone! I have caught myself yearning to point my finger and expect my partner to change. Instead, I take these three steps because they work. It’s time to step up! Listen to the Full Episode: Featured on the Show:  Two highly influential individuals mentioned: Marshall Rosenberg and Byron Katie. For free support in your upleveling journey join my Facebook group Expats on Purpose.  Subscribe: iTunes | Android Full Episode Transcript: Download Transcript Welcome to the Expat Happy Hour, this is Sundae Bean from www.sundaebean.com. I am a solution-oriented coach and intercultural strategist for individuals and organizations and I am on a mission to help you adapt and succeed when living abroad and get you through any life transition So, I was looking at something on Facebook and suddenly a message popped up. A message that I’ll share with you and I have a hunch that it might sound familiar. “Hey Sundae, I’ve been thinking a lot about your video and upleveling my life, you know getting clear on my priorities. I have a question for you. How do we align our priorities with our husbands? Probably not the right way to phrase it, but in my life, I’ve been working really hard to connect differently to my kids. I’ve changed my communication style and working differently with them and then always seeking opportunities to engage with them. But despite my best courageous conversations, you know using the tools that you sent me, thank you Sundae, my husband just won’t step up. On the weekends, he lives by his phone iPad or the TV you can’t step away from devices part of it is because pressure of work, but I really feel the biggest part is actually habit. I can’t discuss it with him without it escalating. He feels like I’m criticizing. In in the meantime, it’s the kids that miss out. So what do you do? I know I’m not the only one. What can we do about spouses that just aren’t connected or visible with the kids let alone our relationships? What can we do?” I looked at the screen and thought man I know this is hard. I sent her a message. I’m going to share much of that message with you today because I get it. If this sounds familiar maybe it’s not about your kids, maybe it’s something else. But I know it’s hard. You feel like you’re making huge changes in your life. Maybe it’s with your health or your business or your family and you’re all motivated but then you have this huge downslide because you’re frustrated that your partner isn’t onboard. They’re not stepping up in their lives and you feel like you’re moving forward and they’re behind almost dragging you down. You want to grab them and shake them and say “Don’t you see what you’re missing? Wake up!” I get it! When we’re making changes in our life that impact our entire system with our families or partners maybe our team, whatever it is, we want other people to change with us because we see how good it is. But the truth is you can’t change other people, you can only change yourself. At the same time. It doesn’t mean that you have to accept everything. In today’s podcast it’s all about how you can speak up so others are stepping up to help meet your needs or to understand what’s important to you. So I’m going to share three steps for what you can do when you’re with your partner who won’t step up. And this might be your romantic partner, this could be a business partner, this could even be one of your family members because we are in partnership with people that we love, the people that we work with, with people that we depend upon. So this isn’t just a spouse thing, the same steps can work with other relationships. All right, I’ll dive right in using the example from the person who wrote to me but you’ll see that the same steps can be used for whatever is on your mind. Step 1: When your partner won’t step up – make the impact transparent. Make the impact transparent. So with my client that wrote in to me I shared a worksheet from Marshall Rosenberg that talks about nonviolent communication, and I will make sure I include that in the show notes so that you are on the same page as I am. But what it basically does is makes the impact on you transparent. So just basically you start by saying “Hey I notice that I am on a huge kick to make changes in my life with the girls” let’s say “and I’ve really up levelled the way I communicate with them and how I’m taking care of myself. So I have more patience, at the same time I’ve also noticed that when you come home from work you go straight to your phone or the TV and the girls don’t get a lot of attention from you. So I’m guessing that you’re tired and that you wanted to decompress. What can we do as a family so that you can decompress and we can also make time and energy as a family?” So you’ll see the details in the notes for now, violent communication but what I basically did is: what I noticed how I feel, the impact on me, and then the request that you make to them. This is helping your partner understand the impact on the family, in a way that is loving and non-threatening. So make the impact transparent. Step 2: Get creative. Essentially what you’re saying is “hey I see that you’ve needs, right you’re exhausted, let’s meet them”, and you’re saying “’I’ve got needs too let’s meet them em”. So now you can make that impact transparent and you share what needs you have. So in this case her need is to have support in the way she’s creating a more connected family and one of her needs is also to have a happy husband whose having his needs met. So you sit together and you say “okay, now that we know this is what we mean together how do we how do we do both at the same time?” Most people fight over strategy and not needs, like “nobody would fight that you shouldn’t relax but we fight like why are you watching TV? You should be outside playing soccer with the girls”, right we don’t fight about needs. No one would argue with the fact that you need to decompress after work but we do fight about strategy. So that helps keep your needs in the center. Maybe this person’s needs is to really live in alignment with the type of mother that she wants to be. That’s important to her that she is living in the way that she wants to lead her girls, nobody would argue in that case. But how can you make that happen? So number two is get creative. Step 3: This is where it gets tough for some people, is – put the ball in their court. Byron Katie has a very simple explanation of what you need to do in terms of putting the ball in their court, she says there’s three types of business and you need to ask whose business you’re in: There’s your business which means your needs, your emotions, your priorities. There’s their business, that means how they get their needs met, what their emotions are what they think. And then there’s God’s business, and in the spirit that Byron Katie means God’s business, might be like you know, is there going to be a typhoon? How long will I live? Will something that’s totally out of my control really happen? That’s God’s business. I know when my son was about four years old I was already worried about when he’s 16, that’s the kind of Mom I am, I’m going to worry 12 years in advance. The future is not my business in that sense because that was causing stress. So here we go. Put the ball in their court, is giving back into your business and letting them take care of theirs. So he for example is super stressed at work. He needs to think of strategies to decompress that are in alignment with the needs of the whole family and while you as a partner might be there to brainstorm strategies how you can could co-create this, essentially it’s his job to manage his stress. And if he needs something, like if he needs a buffer in his day between work and family life, then he can ask for that. I have an article about creating a buffer in your day and why that’s important for your life, and I’ll also include it in the show notes for you. So that’s the ball in his court. He needs to think about “hey my stress is impacting the family, what can I do?” So they have less of an impact on them but still meet my needs to decompress. So, we have said first make the impact transparent, second get creative and third put the ball in their court, and then you let them go. You have an agreement, you talk about the strategies, you make an experiment to see how it goes, and if you feel weeks down the road you’re not seeing results then you just go back to number one and you share the impact. “Hey hon a couple of weeks ago we talked about some strategies that you’re going to use to decompress after work. You said you were going to take 10 minutes to go for a walk around the block before into the house. But I noticed that you didn’t, that you went straight from the car into the house and I also notice that you continued to go straight to the TV instead of playing soccer with the girls like you promised. Obviously you need some support because that strategy is not working for you. I’m feeling a little bit pessimistic that this is actually going to work, and I do want to believe in you. So what can we do to tweak this plan so that you go back and you don’t give up.?” Because essentially you teach people how to treat you and if you let it go too long then things backslide into exactly where they started. We’ve looked at this one, two, three, four. This specific situation when your partner brings the stress from work home and you want to make a change in that. I actually have an article I’ve written exactly about that what to do when your partner has a high pressure job and that is impacting your home life. I will also include that in the show notes for you. But maybe it’s something else that’s important to you maybe what you’re working on up leveling is your health. One of my clients was on a fast track to up leveling her life. We were seeing really cool things happening in coaching and she got stuck, because with her partner what they did was Netflix and wine and that wasn’t in alignment anymore with the way she was up leveling her health, so the conversation with her partner went like this. “Hey honey I’ve noticed that I’m really really committed to making long term changes in my health, how I’m eating, how much I want to move and I feel really excited about this, at the same time I feel kind of conflicted because one of the things that we do to spend time together is hang out watch netflix and drink wine, which I love but I’m conflicted because I value my health and this isn’t in alignment with how I want to spend my evenings, and I still want to be connected to you. Would you be willing to brainstorm with me how we can make a small change? Maybe we can pick one night where we do Netflix and wine and the other nights we go for a walk before sunset?” So she was able to use this process with her partner to raise awareness about the changes that she’s making in her life to up level and ask her partner to get on board in a way that felt was in alignment with that individual as well. You can’t make your partner go on a health kick either but what happened, which is really sweet in this story, is her partner did get on board and did start walking with her and when they had broken the routine then he started stepping up in his own life which isn’t the point. Actually the point is you step up in your life and you get your needs met and you find a way that everybody gets their needs met and then you see what happens. Right, you have to let go of the outcome and in this case the outcome was really positive which happens most of the time. Maybe what you’re trying to up level is your connection with your partner. Maybe you feel like there’s some distance that’s come between you. One of my clients had a situation similar to this where she raised the awareness to her partner, and it went something like this “Hey honey I noticed when you come home from work that we don’t really talk a lot, you know I make dinner and you set the table and I feel like you know the newspaper is more important than me. We don’t have eye contact, you don’t ask me questions about my day and it makes me feel kind of sad because I really love to share about my life with you and I’d love to hear what’s planned your life, and I also really value being important to you, I value our connection. What I think about it, I have a hunch that we just have to create a routine where we can connect in a way that outside distractions don’t interrupt. Would you be willing to schedule a date night like once a month so we can at least connect Ben?” That conversation turned out really well, they found out that it was their routine that was in the way and not their relationship. She was cooking and he’s not a cook, he set the table and while she was still cooking he sat down and read the paper. Simple, it wasn’t about them, it was about the structure and the habit in a creative. So whatever it is, you can apply these three steps to take back control when what you’re thinking is that your partner won’t step up, number one make the impact transparent to get creative and three put the ball in their court and repeat as necessary. I get it, I get it these situations, it is so easy, I don’t know how many times I have wanted to point the finger at my partner and say “you change.’’ I’m literally pointing my arm into the air right now because that’s how bad I wanted to do it! I feel so much better when I can look at the one that I love and say you do the right thing, but you’re in this for the long haul, and we know that you teach people how to treat you. So here’s the thing. When what we thought was we wanted our partner to step up is actually an invitation for you to step up for you to learn what you need and how you can get those needs met by yourself for yourself and in partnership with the people that are important to you. So you’re the one levelling up for your relationship and for yourself and that is worth stepping up for! You’ve been listening to the Expat Happy Hour with Sundae Bean. Thank you for listening, I hope you’ve been enjoying the new format of the podcast that you can see on the blog. Now you can either listen and if that isn’t what you want to do you can download the transcript or scroll through to reach it on my site. So if you’re a avid podcast listener and you love my content but you know your friends are more readers then let them know about this shift in format for Expat Happy Hour, because the more people who know about this, the more changes in lives that we can impact together. All right so if you’re one of those listeners please leave a comment on the blog post or write a review and in iTunes so we can get the message out to more. All right. Love you guys. Thanks for listening. I’m going to leave you with an anonymous quote “level up so no one can leave you hanging.” Enjoy The Show?  Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via iTunes or RSS. Leave us a review in iTunes (or here for Android).  The post 107: You’re Changing But Your Partner Isn’t appeared first on Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC..

There are times in your life when you’re on a passionate journey to uplevel your life, when you suddenly realise that your partner is being left behind. No matter how hard you’d like to ignore it, they are just not in the same space as us. What can you do if you’re making big changes in your parenting approach, your health or your routines but your partner just isn’t? The truth is you really cannot change anyone else, you have to make the change yourself. In today’s episode, I’m showing you three steps to take back control when you’re afraid  your partner won’t step up. <h4>What You’ll Discover in this Episode:</h4> <ul> <li> <ul> <li>How to communicate so that what you’re saying sinks in.</li> <li>What to focus on first.</li> <li>When to step in.</li> </ul> </li> </ul> This dilemma is exactly what one of my clients has recently been through and, to be honest, she is not alone! I have caught myself yearning to point my finger and expect my partner to change. Instead, I take these three steps because they work. It’s time to step up! <h4>Listen to the Full Episode:</h4> <h4>Featured on the Show:</h4> <ul> <li>Two highly influential individuals mentioned: <a href="https://www.nonviolentcommunication.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Marshall Rosenberg</a> and <a href="http://thework.com/en" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Byron Katie</a>.</li> <li>For free support in your upleveling journey join my Facebook group <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/expatsonpurpose/?ref=group_header" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Expats on Purpose</a>.</li> </ul> Subscribe: <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> | <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a> <h4>Full Episode Transcript:</h4> <a href="https://www.dropbox.com/s/wg7tkb7fyps53f1/EP107_%20TRANSCRIPT_You%27re%20Changing%20but%20your%20Partner%20Isn%27t.pdf?dl=0" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" target="_blank">Download Transcript</a> Welcome to the Expat Happy Hour, this is Sundae Bean from <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">www.sundaebean.com</a>. I am a solution-oriented coach and intercultural strategist for individuals and organizations and I am on a mission to help you adapt and succeed when living abroad and get you through any life transition So, I was looking at something on Facebook and suddenly a message popped up. A message that I’ll share with you and I have a hunch that it might sound familiar. “Hey Sundae, I’ve been thinking a lot about your video and upleveling my life, you know getting clear on my priorities. I have a question for you. How do we align our priorities with our husbands? Probably not the right way to phrase it, but in my life, I’ve been working really hard to connect differently to my kids. I’ve changed my communication style and working differently with them and then always seeking opportunities to engage with them. But despite my best courageous conversations, you know using the tools that you sent me, thank you Sundae, my husband just won’t step up. On the weekends, he lives by his phone iPad or the TV you can’t step away from devices part of it is because pressure of work, but I really feel the biggest part is actually habit. I can’t discuss it with him without it escalating. He feels like I’m criticizing. In in the meantime, it’s the kids that miss out. So what do you do? I know I’m not the only one. What can we do about spouses that just aren’t connected or visible with the kids let alone our relationships? What can we do?” I looked at the screen and thought man I know this is hard. I sent her a message. I’m going to share much of that message with you today because I get it. If this sounds familiar maybe it’s not about your kids, maybe it’s something else. But I know it’s hard. You feel like you’re making huge changes in your life. Maybe it’s with your health or your business or your family and you’re all motivated but then you have this huge downslide because you’re frustrated that your partner isn’t onboard. They’re not stepping up in their lives and you feel like you’re moving forward and they’re behind almost dragging you down. You want to grab them and shake them and say “Don’t you see what you’re missing? Wake up!” I get it! When we’re making changes in our life that impact our entire system with our families or partners maybe our team, whatever it is, we want other people to change with us because we see how good it is. But the truth is you can’t change other people, you can only change yourself. At the same time. It doesn’t mean that you have to accept everything. In today’s podcast it’s all about how you can speak up so others are stepping up to help meet your needs or to understand what’s important to you. So I’m going to share three steps for what you can do when you’re with your partner who won’t step up. And this might be your romantic partner, this could be a business partner, this could even be one of your family members because we are in partnership with people that we love, the people that we work with, with people that we depend upon. So this isn’t just a spouse thing, the same steps can work with other relationships. All right, I’ll dive right in using the example from the person who wrote to me but you’ll see that the same steps can be used for whatever is on your mind. Step 1: When your partner won’t step up – make the impact transparent. Make the impact transparent. So with my client that wrote in to me I shared a worksheet from Marshall Rosenberg that talks about nonviolent communication, and I will make sure I include that in the show notes so that you are on the same page as I am. But what it basically does is makes the impact on you transparent. So just basically you start by saying “Hey I notice that I am on a huge kick to make changes in my life with the girls” let’s say “and I’ve really up levelled the way I communicate with them and how I’m taking care of myself. So I have more patience, at the same time I’ve also noticed that when you come home from work you go straight to your phone or the TV and the girls don’t get a lot of attention from you. So I’m guessing that you’re tired and that you wanted to decompress. What can we do as a family so that you can decompress and we can also make time and energy as a family?” So you’ll see the details in the notes for now, violent communication but what I basically did is: what I noticed how I feel, the impact on me, and then the request that you make to them. This is helping your partner understand the impact on the family, in a way that is loving and non-threatening. So make the impact transparent. Step 2: Get creative. Essentially what you’re saying is “hey I see that you’ve needs, right you’re exhausted, let’s meet them”, and you’re saying “’I’ve got needs too let’s meet them em”. So now you can make that impact transparent and you share what needs you have. So in this case her need is to have support in the way she’s creating a more connected family and one of her needs is also to have a happy husband whose having his needs met. So you sit together and you say “okay, now that we know this is what we mean together how do we how do we do both at the same time?” Most people fight over strategy and not needs, like “nobody would fight that you shouldn’t relax but we fight like why are you watching TV? You should be outside playing soccer with the girls”, right we don’t fight about needs. No one would argue with the fact that you need to decompress after work but we do fight about strategy. So that helps keep your needs in the center. Maybe this person’s needs is to really live in alignment with the type of mother that she wants to be. That’s important to her that she is living in the way that she wants to lead her girls, nobody would argue in that case. But how can you make that happen? So number two is get creative. Step 3: This is where it gets tough for some people, is – put the ball in their court. Byron Katie has a very simple explanation of what you need to do in terms of putting the ball in their court, she says there’s three types of business and you need to ask whose business you’re in: There’s your business which means your needs, your emotions, your priorities. There’s their business, that means how they get their needs met, what their emotions are what they think. And then there’s God’s business, and in the spirit that Byron Katie means God’s business, might be like you know, is there going to be a typhoon? How long will I live? Will something that’s totally out of my control really happen? That’s God’s business. I know when my son was about four years old I was already worried about when he’s 16, that’s the kind of Mom I am, I’m going to worry 12 years in advance. The future is not my business in that sense because that was causing stress. So here we go. Put the ball in their court, is giving back into your business and letting them take care of theirs. So he for example is super stressed at work. He needs to think of strategies to decompress that are in alignment with the needs of the whole family and while you as a partner might be there to brainstorm strategies how you can could co-create this, essentially it’s his job to manage his stress. And if he needs something, like if he needs a buffer in his day between work and family life, then he can ask for that. I have an article about creating a buffer in your day and why that’s important for your life, and I’ll also include it in the show notes for you. So that’s the ball in his court. He needs to think about “hey my stress is impacting the family, what can I do?” So they have less of an impact on them but still meet my needs to decompress. So, we have said first make the impact transparent, second get creative and third put the ball in their court, and then you let them go. You have an agreement, you talk about the strategies, you make an experiment to see how it goes, and if you feel weeks down the road you’re not seeing results then you just go back to number one and you share the impact. “Hey hon a couple of weeks ago we talked about some strategies that you’re going to use to decompress after work. You said you were going to take 10 minutes to go for a walk around the block before into the house. But I noticed that you didn’t, that you went straight from the car into the house and I also notice that you continued to go straight to the TV instead of playing soccer with the girls like you promised. Obviously you need some support because that strategy is not working for you. I’m feeling a little bit pessimistic that this is actually going to work, and I do want to believe in you. So what can we do to tweak this plan so that you go back and you don’t give up.?” Because essentially you teach people how to treat you and if you let it go too long then things backslide into exactly where they started. We’ve looked at this one, two, three, four. This specific situation when your partner brings the stress from work home and you want to make a change in that. I actually have an article I’ve written exactly about that what to do when your partner has a high pressure job and that is impacting your home life. I will also include that in the show notes for you. But maybe it’s something else that’s important to you maybe what you’re working on up leveling is your health. One of my clients was on a fast track to up leveling her life. We were seeing really cool things happening in coaching and she got stuck, because with her partner what they did was Netflix and wine and that wasn’t in alignment anymore with the way she was up leveling her health, so the conversation with her partner went like this. “Hey honey I’ve noticed that I’m really really committed to making long term changes in my health, how I’m eating, how much I want to move and I feel really excited about this, at the same time I feel kind of conflicted because one of the things that we do to spend time together is hang out watch netflix and drink wine, which I love but I’m conflicted because I value my health and this isn’t in alignment with how I want to spend my evenings, and I still want to be connected to you. Would you be willing to brainstorm with me how we can make a small change? Maybe we can pick one night where we do Netflix and wine and the other nights we go for a walk before sunset?” So she was able to use this process with her partner to raise awareness about the changes that she’s making in her life to up level and ask her partner to get on board in a way that felt was in alignment with that individual as well. You can’t make your partner go on a health kick either but what happened, which is really sweet in this story, is her partner did get on board and did start walking with her and when they had broken the routine then he started stepping up in his own life which isn’t the point. Actually the point is you step up in your life and you get your needs met and you find a way that everybody gets their needs met and then you see what happens. Right, you have to let go of the outcome and in this case the outcome was really positive which happens most of the time. Maybe what you’re trying to up level is your connection with your partner. Maybe you feel like there’s some distance that’s come between you. One of my clients had a situation similar to this where she raised the awareness to her partner, and it went something like this “Hey honey I noticed when you come home from work that we don’t really talk a lot, you know I make dinner and you set the table and I feel like you know the newspaper is more important than me. We don’t have eye contact, you don’t ask me questions about my day and it makes me feel kind of sad because I really love to share about my life with you and I’d love to hear what’s planned your life, and I also really value being important to you, I value our connection. What I think about it, I have a hunch that we just have to create a routine where we can connect in a way that outside distractions don’t interrupt. Would you be willing to schedule a date night like once a month so we can at least connect Ben?” That conversation turned out really well, they found out that it was their routine that was in the way and not their relationship. She was cooking and he’s not a cook, he set the table and while she was still cooking he sat down and read the paper. Simple, it wasn’t about them, it was about the structure and the habit in a creative. So whatever it is, you can apply these three steps to take back control when what you’re thinking is that your partner won’t step up, number one make the impact transparent to get creative and three put the ball in their court and repeat as necessary. I get it, I get it these situations, it is so easy, I don’t know how many times I have wanted to point the finger at my partner and say “you change.’’ I’m literally pointing my arm into the air right now because that’s how bad I wanted to do it! I feel so much better when I can look at the one that I love and say you do the right thing, but you’re in this for the long haul, and we know that you teach people how to treat you. So here’s the thing. When what we thought was we wanted our partner to step up is actually an invitation for you to step up for you to learn what you need and how you can get those needs met by yourself for yourself and in partnership with the people that are important to you. So you’re the one levelling up for your relationship and for yourself and that is worth stepping up for! You’ve been listening to the Expat Happy Hour with Sundae Bean. Thank you for listening, I hope you’ve been enjoying the new format of the podcast that you can see on the blog. Now you can either listen and if that isn’t what you want to do you can download the transcript or scroll through to reach it on my site. So if you’re a avid podcast listener and you love my content but you know your friends are more readers then let them know about this shift in format for Expat Happy Hour, because the more people who know about this, the more changes in lives that we can impact together. All right so if you’re one of those listeners please leave a comment on the blog post or write a review and in iTunes so we can get the message out to more. All right. Love you guys. Thanks for listening. I’m going to leave you with an anonymous quote “level up so no one can leave you hanging.” <h4>Enjoy The Show?</h4> <ul> <li>Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> or RSS.</li> <li>Leave us a review in <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2&amp;fbclid=IwAR3CWvmzCfKy0sUEwjpcDXPjvAdnlLSiNE2SAEzYF6wZ55UOH6tqleI84Jc" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> (or here for <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a>).</li> </ul> The post <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/2019/01/21/107-youre-chaing-but-your-partner-isnt/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">107: You’re Changing But Your Partner Isn’t</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC.</a>.

107: You’re Changing But Your Partner Isn’t

132: You Have A Responsibility To Get Unstuck

Dan Millman

143: Purpose & Direction Amidst Chaos with Dan Millman

There’s an important life event happening halfway around the world that you don’t want to miss but you are stuck in indecisiveness.  Should I go? Should I stay? Living abroad without regret is one of my core principles and knowing when to make a grand gesture is part of living that. Inspired by my decision to say “yes” to 42 hours of travel to spend nearly the same amount of time celebrating my parents’ 50th wedding anniversary, I share guidelines on what to consider when contemplating whether it’s time to make a grand gesture. What You’ll Discover in this Episode:    What counts as a grand gesture. How to know whether making one is the right move. What we need to remember when we are considering making a grand gesture.    Making a grand gesture is just one of many ways to “love the crap out of your people.” Listen to today’s episode and get tips on how you can live your life abroad without regret. Listen to the Full Episode: Featured on the Show:  Blog Article – Far away from loved ones: Five ways to stop regret Podcast Love your friends and family while they’re alive episode 64. For free support in your change journey join my Facebook group Expats on Purpose.  Subscribe: iTunes | Android Full Episode Transcript: Download Transcript Welcome to the Expat Happy Hour, this is Sundae Bean fromwww.sundaebean.com. I am a solution-oriented coach and intercultural strategist for individuals and organizations and I am on a mission to help you adapt and succeed when living abroad and get you through any life transition. Me to my travel agent: “I want to fly out on Sunday, not Monday.” His response: “But are you sure? You’ll be in the air for over 42 hours and only be in the country for 48.” Surely that can’t be right? That is not even ecologically responsible, and really terrible on my body, not to mention obliterating my productivity at work, that I’ll be reeling from jet lag for days.  So why why why why would I tell my travel agent “No, in fact I’m going to fly on Sunday making the time I’m in the air almost the same as the time I’m on the ground.”   Why? Because ….. Love. Sometimes you need to go out of your way and make a grand gesture, and by the time you’ll be listening to this, that’s exactly what I’ll be doing. My Mama &amp; Papa both turn 70 this year and they’re celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary. I mean how many people are lucky enough to say, one that they made it to their 70th and two that they have stuck together all the way through 50 years of marriage. Their only wish was to have the three of us kids there with them, at a Bob Seger concert. Yep, I’m gonna be hopping on a plane late Wednesday night, landing on Thursday and party to Bob Seger with my nuclear family by Friday night. There’s a side story of why this is happening now and not actually on my father’s 70th because he was too busy at Lady Gaga, which is a whole ‘nother story and probably says way too much about my family than should be public. I’ve got a family that likes to enjoy life and celebrate if you haven’t noticed and what you also might know about me is that you know how important it is to me to live abroad without regrets and this is the perfect example, right? I could have said no, everybody would have understood. I mean really to put everything down and fly so far away for such a short event. I don’t even know if we’re actually sitting with my parents at the concert and I’m inconveniencing my husband, I know that, sorry sweetie. My kids are gonna be like, “Where’s Mom?” and in fact, we’ve had some unsettling things at home with who’s going to be taking care of the kids exactly at what time and my friends are chipping in to make sure that we’re covered. So it’s kind of an inconvenience, yet I have the support of my loved ones on this end because this grand gesture is so worth it. I can just see it now, I can’t wait and I might show some pictures on social media when it’s happening, so have a look for that when it happens. I’m super pumped that I’m going but it was a tough call. Today’s episode is super simple, I’m going to offer just a few things for you to think about when you’re making a tough call. What should you ask yourself when you’re making the decision? Is this the time for a grand gesture or not?  So let’s define what a grand gesture is first before we get started. For me a grand gesture is something where you go out of your way, going to a friend’s birthday party is just a gesture of support but taking work off and getting in the airplane and flying a few hours to go to their birthday is a grand gesture. A grand gesture might be something that you’ve been planning for a long time. One of my best friends from college hand Illustrated a book for me for my 40th. I mean, I ugly cried so hard when I saw it, that is a grand gesture. One of my other really really close friends Illustrated an image of me and my family on my birthday, that is a grand gesture, where someone goes out of their way and is so thoughtful and spends time above and beyond the normal.  So grand gestures can be for a lot of things, they’re often to celebrate something or someone but a grand gesture could also be an extension of support when someone is struggling. And one of the things I know about expat life is that when you live abroad, when you live far away, one of the things that we all struggle with is not being there face to face. Like that time when my girlfriend got divorced and I wish I was there to move boxes. That sucks. That time when another friend lost her husband and I wasn’t there on the day of the funeral. We think, “How can we not be there on that day?! How can we not?!”  And what can we do instead to show our love? To make a grand gesture.  So I’m going to throw in a few ideas for you to think about the next time you’re faced with a question, should I or shouldn’t I? Is this time for a grand gesture or not? Because the end of the day even a thought of a grand gesture is really just asking the question “How can I love my people?” If you’ve listened to my podcast already, in my work, you know that my thing is to love the crap out of your people. So the grand gesture is, “Is this the right way to do that?” So here are just a few things for you to think about.  Is it time to say yes to a grand gesture?  Number one: Is it something that you’ll regret if you don’t do it?  Okay, then maybe it’s a yes. Can you show up when no one else is? Also an opportunity for grand gesture. I know that I’ve had people who’ve experienced loss and when you’re so far away, it’s so hard to not be there. And what I’ve learned from them in hindsight,  how much they appreciated me showing up after everybody got quiet. I didn’t realize it in the moment that that was a grand gesture, but what I heard from them is it felt like it to them. So can you show up when no one else is? Maybe someone had surgery and got all the help in the hospital but once they’re home no one’s there. Maybe they had a baby and the mother-in-law just left and they’re sitting there overwhelmed not knowing how they’re going to do it all. Can you show up when no one else is?  Number one: Is it something that you know you’ll regret if you don’t do it?  Number two: Can you show up when no one else is? Number three: Will it be something that they’ll remember for a lifetime? Like are you gonna do it and then they’re going to remember it when they’re old and gray in a rocking chair? That is a great time for a grand gesture. Number three will it be something that they remember for a lifetime. Number four: Does it make your body feel like you’ve got champagne bubbles inside? Like you get all excited and it just feels right even though it doesn’t seem logical? Does it make your body go all champagne bubbly? That’s a sign that a grand gesture could be in order.   Number five: Is it inconvenient for you but makes the life of someone you love so much easier? Is it inconvenient for you, but makes a life of someone you love so much better?Number six: Is this immediate inconvenience more than worth the energy you’ll get from being there or from the memories you’ll carry for a lifetime? Number seven: Is saying yes to this grand gesture also living your core values? So maybe one of your values is to be present during the hard stuff.  Maybe it would be easier emotionally for you if you weren’t there, but one of your values is to be present during the hard stuff. Then maybe it’s time to say yes to a grand gesture. So these are just a few ideas, I’ve listed seven here.  Of course this is not a comprehensive list, but it’s a beginning for you to start thinking.  In that time where you’re trying to make the tough call should you ask for work off? Should you book the flight? Should you put in the holiday vacation? Should you ask your partner to babysit? Whatever it is, these serve as the beginning guidelines to get you thinking on whether or not you say yes to the grand gesture. Commemorating a special day, planning something special, celebrating or supporting someone in ways that others are not.  Again, this is just a way to love our people, to stay connected, and sometimes a grand gesture is exactly the right thing. But, a grand gesture isn’t always the right thing. So here are a few things for you to consider, to think twice, when you’re considering yes or no on taking the leap.  Number one: Do you feel like you should go, not like you want to go. There’s no champagne bubbles in your belly, you feel like you should. Number two: Are you doing it because the pressure from the family feels too big? Number three: You haven’t yet thought about how else you could support by not being there. And I’ve shared in another episode the time when my 92 year old grandfather passed away during the worst blizzard in Europe and North America. Where airports were closed all over and it was on the weekend, Friday after work when I found out. And I was supposed to make it by Monday, but I was so discombobulated on Saturday I couldn’t even think straight. And one of my best friends in Switzerland she said “Sundae, you don’t always have to hop in an airplane and fly across the world in a snowstorm to support.  How else can you support your Mom? How else can you honor your grandfather?” and she was so right.  So maybe a grand gesture isn’t the right thing when you haven’t yet thought about how else you could support. And in that situation I told my mother that it didn’t feel right to get on the airplane because of the blizzard and all of the other things that we’re going on and she said “I’m so relieved, Sundae if you had gone I would have just worried about you.” And what I did instead is I created a ceremony at the same time as the funeral from my home with my son and my loved ones so that I could honor him. So think through what are other ways that you could support if there’s no champagne bubbles in your belly and your trying to see if it’s the right thing. Number four: You might think twice if the grand gesture would be personally damaging to you in the long run. Like you’ll lose your job or it’ll ruin you financially. Sometimes we are so overwhelmed with wanting to love the crap out of our people that we don’t think clearly. And the ironic part about that is the people on the receiving end love you so much they don’t want the gesture to be at the detriment of you and your life. Number five: It’s very simple, think twice if something inside of you says “Hmm, don’t do it.”  Something wise inside says, “Don’t do it.“  Then those are times where you might want to pause before you pull the trigger on the grand gesture. Remember there are a lot of ways to show people you love them and I believe one of the most important ways is to, as you know my philosophy, to love them while they are alive, love them now. So what can you do to love them in little ways so that when you’re debating about the grand gesture, there’s buckets and buckets full of love already that are already filled.  And when we show people that we love them the best ones, the best gestures are the ones that come from your whole heart. Sometimes you need to go out of your way and make a grand gesture and I’m doing that this week by rocking up to a Bob Seger concert with my siblings and my Mama and Papa halfway around the world. I can’t wait. I have no idea if jet lag will be on my side or not and whether rum and coke will be my friend or my foe, but I can’t wait to celebrate with my family in this grand gesture celebrating an amazing couple a symbol of love for 50 years. My parents are turning 70 and they’re taking their kids to this rock concert. These are people that I admire so much. I love how they live. My father’s philosophy is life is for the living. I mean the guy who’s 70 and goes to Lady Gaga on his birthday is a good example of that, right? They taught me how to love the crap out of my people and now I’m sharing that with you. So if you want to think about more ways that you can love the crap out of your people, that you can live abroad without regret, I’ve got more for you. You can check out in the show notes a blog article called far away from loved ones five ways to stop regret. I’ve also done a podcast says love your friends and family while they’re Alive episode 64. Those are just two of many messages I share around how you can live your life abroad without regret, and maybe a grand gesture will help you do just that. You’ve been listening to the Expat Happy hour with Sundae Bean. Thank you for listening.  I will leave you with the words of Andriana Sawyer, American author and consultant “Self-reflection is a much kinder teacher than regret.” Enjoy The Show?  Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via iTunes or RSS. Leave us a review in iTunes (or here for Android).  The post 110: Grand Gestures appeared first on Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC..

There’s an important life event happening halfway around the world that you don’t want to miss but you are stuck in indecisiveness.  Should I go? Should I stay? Living abroad without regret is one of my core principles and knowing when to make a grand gesture is part of living that. Inspired by my decision to say “yes” to 42 hours of travel to spend nearly the same amount of time celebrating my parents’ 50th wedding anniversary, I share guidelines on what to consider when contemplating whether it’s time to make a grand gesture. <h4>What You’ll Discover in this Episode:</h4> <ul> <li> <ul> <li>What counts as a grand gesture.</li> <li>How to know whether making one is the right move.</li> <li>What we need to remember when we are considering making a grand gesture.</li> </ul> </li> </ul> Making a grand gesture is just one of many ways to “love the crap out of your people.” Listen to today’s episode and get tips on how you can live your life abroad without regret. <h4>Listen to the Full Episode:</h4> <h4>Featured on the Show:</h4> <ul> <li>Blog Article – <a href="https://sundaebean.com/2015/10/19/stop-regretting-the-distance-expat-life/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Far away from loved ones: Five ways to stop regret</a></li> <li>Podcast <a href="https://sundaebean.com/2018/03/26/64-love-your-friends-and-family-while-theyre-alive/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Love your friends and family while they’re alive episode 64.</a></li> <li>For free support in your change journey join my Facebook group <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/expatsonpurpose/?ref=group_header" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Expats on Purpose</a>.</li> </ul> Subscribe: <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> | <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a> <h4>Full Episode Transcript:</h4> <a href="https://drive.google.com/open?id=1nJuxNCxW2iDrJ7JnFocHtIearkHeLQ-o" rel="noopener noreferrer nofollow" target="_blank">Download Transcript</a> Welcome to the Expat Happy Hour, this is Sundae Bean from<a href="https://www.sundaebean.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">www.sundaebean.com</a>. I am a solution-oriented coach and intercultural strategist for individuals and organizations and I am on a mission to help you adapt and succeed when living abroad and get you through any life transition. Me to my travel agent: “I want to fly out on Sunday, not Monday.” His response: “But are you sure? You’ll be in the air for over 42 hours and only be in the country for 48.” Surely that can’t be right? That is not even ecologically responsible, and really terrible on my body, not to mention obliterating my productivity at work, that I’ll be reeling from jet lag for days.  So why why why why would I tell my travel agent “No, in fact I’m going to fly on Sunday making the time I’m in the air almost the same as the time I’m on the ground.”   Why? Because ….. Love. Sometimes you need to go out of your way and make a grand gesture, and by the time you’ll be listening to this, that’s exactly what I’ll be doing. My Mama &amp; Papa both turn 70 this year and they’re celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary. I mean how many people are lucky enough to say, one that they made it to their 70th and two that they have stuck together all the way through 50 years of marriage. Their only wish was to have the three of us kids there with them, at a Bob Seger concert. Yep, I’m gonna be hopping on a plane late Wednesday night, landing on Thursday and party to Bob Seger with my nuclear family by Friday night. There’s a side story of why this is happening now and not actually on my father’s 70th because he was too busy at Lady Gaga, which is a whole ‘nother story and probably says way too much about my family than should be public. I’ve got a family that likes to enjoy life and celebrate if you haven’t noticed and what you also might know about me is that you know how important it is to me to live abroad without regrets and this is the perfect example, right? I could have said no, everybody would have understood. I mean really to put everything down and fly so far away for such a short event. I don’t even know if we’re actually sitting with my parents at the concert and I’m inconveniencing my husband, I know that, sorry sweetie. My kids are gonna be like, “Where’s Mom?” and in fact, we’ve had some unsettling things at home with who’s going to be taking care of the kids exactly at what time and my friends are chipping in to make sure that we’re covered. So it’s kind of an inconvenience, yet I have the support of my loved ones on this end because this grand gesture is so worth it. I can just see it now, I can’t wait and I might show some pictures on social media when it’s happening, so have a look for that when it happens. I’m super pumped that I’m going but it was a tough call. Today’s episode is super simple, I’m going to offer just a few things for you to think about when you’re making a tough call. What should you ask yourself when you’re making the decision? Is this the time for a grand gesture or not? So let’s define what a grand gesture is first before we get started. For me a grand gesture is something where you go out of your way, going to a friend’s birthday party is just a gesture of support but taking work off and getting in the airplane and flying a few hours to go to their birthday is a grand gesture. A grand gesture might be something that you’ve been planning for a long time. One of my best friends from college hand Illustrated a book for me for my 40th. I mean, I ugly cried so hard when I saw it, that is a grand gesture. One of my other really really close friends Illustrated an image of me and my family on my birthday, that is a grand gesture, where someone goes out of their way and is so thoughtful and spends time above and beyond the normal.  So grand gestures can be for a lot of things, they’re often to celebrate something or someone but a grand gesture could also be an extension of support when someone is struggling. And one of the things I know about expat life is that when you live abroad, when you live far away, one of the things that we all struggle with is not being there face to face. Like that time when my girlfriend got divorced and I wish I was there to move boxes. That sucks. That time when another friend lost her husband and I wasn’t there on the day of the funeral. We think, “How can we not be there on that day?! How can we not?!” And what can we do instead to show our love? To make a grand gesture. So I’m going to throw in a few ideas for you to think about the next time you’re faced with a question, should I or shouldn’t I? Is this time for a grand gesture or not? Because the end of the day even a thought of a grand gesture is really just asking the question “How can I love my people?” If you’ve listened to my podcast already, in my work, you know that my thing is to love the crap out of your people. So the grand gesture is, “Is this the right way to do that?” So here are just a few things for you to think about. Is it time to say yes to a grand gesture? Number one: Is it something that you’ll regret if you don’t do it?  Okay, then maybe it’s a yes. Can you show up when no one else is? Also an opportunity for grand gesture. I know that I’ve had people who’ve experienced loss and when you’re so far away, it’s so hard to not be there. And what I’ve learned from them in hindsight,  how much they appreciated me showing up after everybody got quiet. I didn’t realize it in the moment that that was a grand gesture, but what I heard from them is it felt like it to them. So can you show up when no one else is? Maybe someone had surgery and got all the help in the hospital but once they’re home no one’s there. Maybe they had a baby and the mother-in-law just left and they’re sitting there overwhelmed not knowing how they’re going to do it all. Can you show up when no one else is? Number one: Is it something that you know you’ll regret if you don’t do it? Number two: Can you show up when no one else is? Number three: Will it be something that they’ll remember for a lifetime? Like are you gonna do it and then they’re going to remember it when they’re old and gray in a rocking chair? That is a great time for a grand gesture. Number three will it be something that they remember for a lifetime. Number four: Does it make your body feel like you’ve got champagne bubbles inside? Like you get all excited and it just feels right even though it doesn’t seem logical? Does it make your body go all champagne bubbly? That’s a sign that a grand gesture could be in order.   Number five: Is it inconvenient for you but makes the life of someone you love so much easier? Is it inconvenient for you, but makes a life of someone you love so much better?Number six: Is this immediate inconvenience more than worth the energy you’ll get from being there or from the memories you’ll carry for a lifetime? Number seven: Is saying yes to this grand gesture also living your core values? So maybe one of your values is to be present during the hard stuff.  Maybe it would be easier emotionally for you if you weren’t there, but one of your values is to be present during the hard stuff. Then maybe it’s time to say yes to a grand gesture. So these are just a few ideas, I’ve listed seven here. Of course this is not a comprehensive list, but it’s a beginning for you to start thinking.  In that time where you’re trying to make the tough call should you ask for work off? Should you book the flight? Should you put in the holiday vacation? Should you ask your partner to babysit? Whatever it is, these serve as the beginning guidelines to get you thinking on whether or not you say yes to the grand gesture. Commemorating a special day, planning something special, celebrating or supporting someone in ways that others are not. Again, this is just a way to love our people, to stay connected, and sometimes a grand gesture is exactly the right thing. But, a grand gesture isn’t always the right thing. So here are a few things for you to consider, to think twice, when you’re considering yes or no on taking the leap. Number one: Do you feel like you should go, not like you want to go. There’s no champagne bubbles in your belly, you feel like you should. Number two: Are you doing it because the pressure from the family feels too big? Number three: You haven’t yet thought about how else you could support by not being there. And I’ve shared in another episode the time when my 92 year old grandfather passed away during the worst blizzard in Europe and North America. Where airports were closed all over and it was on the weekend, Friday after work when I found out. And I was supposed to make it by Monday, but I was so discombobulated on Saturday I couldn’t even think straight. And one of my best friends in Switzerland she said “Sundae, you don’t always have to hop in an airplane and fly across the world in a snowstorm to support.  How else can you support your Mom? How else can you honor your grandfather?” and she was so right. So maybe a grand gesture isn’t the right thing when you haven’t yet thought about how else you could support. And in that situation I told my mother that it didn’t feel right to get on the airplane because of the blizzard and all of the other things that we’re going on and she said “I’m so relieved, Sundae if you had gone I would have just worried about you.” And what I did instead is I created a ceremony at the same time as the funeral from my home with my son and my loved ones so that I could honor him. So think through what are other ways that you could support if there’s no champagne bubbles in your belly and your trying to see if it’s the right thing. Number four: You might think twice if the grand gesture would be personally damaging to you in the long run. Like you’ll lose your job or it’ll ruin you financially. Sometimes we are so overwhelmed with wanting to love the crap out of our people that we don’t think clearly. And the ironic part about that is the people on the receiving end love you so much they don’t want the gesture to be at the detriment of you and your life. Number five: It’s very simple, think twice if something inside of you says “Hmm, don’t do it.”  Something wise inside says, “Don’t do it.“  Then those are times where you might want to pause before you pull the trigger on the grand gesture. Remember there are a lot of ways to show people you love them and I believe one of the most important ways is to, as you know my philosophy, to love them while they are alive, love them now. So what can you do to love them in little ways so that when you’re debating about the grand gesture, there’s buckets and buckets full of love already that are already filled.  And when we show people that we love them the best ones, the best gestures are the ones that come from your whole heart. Sometimes you need to go out of your way and make a grand gesture and I’m doing that this week by rocking up to a Bob Seger concert with my siblings and my Mama and Papa halfway around the world. I can’t wait. I have no idea if jet lag will be on my side or not and whether rum and coke will be my friend or my foe, but I can’t wait to celebrate with my family in this grand gesture celebrating an amazing couple a symbol of love for 50 years. My parents are turning 70 and they’re taking their kids to this rock concert. These are people that I admire so much. I love how they live. My father’s philosophy is life is for the living. I mean the guy who’s 70 and goes to Lady Gaga on his birthday is a good example of that, right? They taught me how to love the crap out of my people and now I’m sharing that with you. So if you want to think about more ways that you can love the crap out of your people, that you can live abroad without regret, I’ve got more for you. You can check out in the show notes a blog article called <a href="https://sundaebean.com/2015/10/19/stop-regretting-the-distance-expat-life/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">far away from loved ones five ways to stop regret</a>. I’ve also done a podcast says <a href="https://sundaebean.com/2018/03/26/64-love-your-friends-and-family-while-theyre-alive/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">love your friends and family while they’re Alive episode 64.</a> Those are just two of many messages I share around how you can live your life abroad without regret, and maybe a grand gesture will help you do just that. You’ve been listening to the Expat Happy hour with Sundae Bean. Thank you for listening. I will leave you with the words of Andriana Sawyer, American author and consultant “Self-reflection is a much kinder teacher than regret.” <h4>Enjoy The Show?</h4> <ul> <li>Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> or RSS.</li> <li>Leave us a review in <a href="https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-bean/id1200782982?mt=2&amp;fbclid=IwAR3CWvmzCfKy0sUEwjpcDXPjvAdnlLSiNE2SAEzYF6wZ55UOH6tqleI84Jc" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">iTunes</a> (or here for <a href="https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/expat-happy-hour-with-sundae-b-418964/reviews?fbclid=IwAR0IdvNqsSLyPVrzROYm3zwmtGKBZXmV1LNBGxf382d-2B-Lv0fTtrvsDdQ" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Android</a>).</li> </ul> The post <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com/2019/02/11/110-grand-gestures/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">110: Grand Gestures</a> appeared first on <a href="https://www.sundaebean.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC.</a>.

110: Grand Gestures

158: Growth Zone Goodness

109: Finding A Job Abroad With Vici Koster-Lenhardt

156: A Telescope in the Rearview Mirror

Jerry Jones

Cath Brew

144: Unlikely Connections with Jerry Jones and Cath Brew

118: The Secret To Being Present With Your Kids.

113: Am I Unknowingly Spoiling My Kids? Overindulgence With Dr. Bredehoft.

150: Job Hunter Wasteland

The topic of friendship and expat life is a difficult but important one.  Research shows the following: “You have a 50% increased odds of survival if you have a solid social network.” As expats it can be difficult to nurture and maintain friendships with people that are no longer in our time zone.  This makes us err on the side of caution when creating new friendships, not wanting to keep losing good friends. What You’ll Discover in this Episode:    How we’ve been thinking about friendships in the wrong way An invitation to change the paradigm of your expat friendships The key question you need to ask about your friendships How to have guilt-free friendships    It is time to start thinking about our friendships in new ways so that we can live abroad with more love and friendship, and zero regret. Listen to the Full Episode:  Featured on the Show:  Episode 64 “Love Your Friends And Family While They’re Alive.” Episode 53 “What Friends And Family Really Think About You Living Abroad.” Episode 110 “Grand Gestures.” Friendship Pyramid https://humans.media/stages-of-friendship  Don’t miss this opportunity to get coached by Sundae – for FREE. Subscribe: iTunes | Android Full Episode Transcript: Download Transcript Welcome to the Expat Happy Hour, this is Sundae Bean from www.sundaebean.com. I am a solution-oriented coach and intercultural strategist for individuals and organizations and I am on a mission to help you adapt and succeed when living abroad and get you through any life transition. “You have a 50% increased odds of survival if you have a solid social network.” This is according to the research from Julianne Holt Lunstad, Professor of psychology and who is also the head of studies at Brigham Young University. Her research on the relationship between friendship and longevity explains, as she says not having a social support network can be a higher death risk, then obesity or leading a sedentary life without exercise. What? If you don’t have your crew of friends, you might be at a higher risk of death than obesity or living a sedentary life.  Let that sink in, right?  Like what are we doing with our attention and energy? Are we spending more time on our fitness than nurturing our friendships? It’s mind-boggling and these statistics are wild but they show us what we’ve known all along, that friends are good for us. And the topic of friendship and expat life can be a tough one. We’re either afraid to make new connections because we are not looking forward to getting our heart broken again everytime our bestie leaves. If you’re the one who’s at a location, you’re a stayer, you’re the one who is at the location permanently and everybody’s rotational. You’re like, “Is it worth putting my heart into it anymore?” Maybe you’re in a bi-national relationship and you’re you know, one of these things are not like the other, you’re the only one like you and everybody else is of a different culture. So you feel like making friends is harder because there’s all these different cultural values and ways of being that aren’t like the people that you connect with back home.  I get it, friendships are hard, living an international life and nurturing these friendships really puts us to the test.  And that’s what I wanted to talk about today on Expat Happy Hour because it’s so important our longevity is at stake.  So in this episode, we’re going to talk about a few things: One, we’re going to take a deep dive into friendships. I’m going to share why we’ve been thinking about friends in the wrong way this whole time, i’m going to offer you a new way to look at expat friendships, and I’m going to help you get clear on how you can make sure you maintain your friendships near and far without regret.  Let’s start with something simple, like stop treating your expat friendships like non-mobile friendships. And what I mean by that is you’re the one living abroad, maybe it’s a rotational thing, maybe it’s because you live you know long-term in one place, but don’t treat your expat friendships like non-mobile ones. And this is, I mean from the research, when I look at research on friendship – most of the research that I see is about friendships that are sedentary so to speak. These are people who move into a community and then nurture relationships with the people there and those people aren’t going anywhere. So what about the research on globally mobile people? One of the things I feel like, we’re working with models and paradigms that are from our old lives before we started living abroad or from models of people who stay in one country and one culture and that’s unfair because we’re trying to see our friendships through a lens that doesn’t fit, it’s like putting on somebody else’s glasses, it just makes us uncomfortable.  So I was looking at models of friendship and one of them I came across was this friendship pyramid, and I can put the reference in the show notes, but it’s this pyramid where you start off as strangers and then you become an acquaintance like, you know, you might recognize them, maybe you’ve said hello, you might have sort of a general knowledge of each other. Then there’s casual friends where you might see each other at places and socialize. Then there’s close friends where you feel more vulnerable with them, you can share more about your life and you know more about who they are and you’re willing to hear more about their private life and likewise, you feel super connected. And then there’s this top of the pyramid which is intimate friends, and those are so special. Where you feel like you are invested in their growth and development as a person and you know that they’re invested in your growth and development as a person. And when we look at this pyramid model, it’s super solid. Like there’s this big base of strangers, you know, a little bit smaller base of acquaintance even smaller of casual friends, close friends, at the tiny tip of the top are intimate friends. And this idea of this pyramid gives us this sense and this is how we progress, okay bit by bit slowly, but slowly. But expat life is not like that, seriously, we don’t operate on this slowly developing model. I know that when I rocked up to Ouagadougou Burkina Faso, I met a family, I had one email contact with them, I went over to their house, I went to their home and we had coffee and I think the next day I was like, “Um, I’ve got a form from the school, I need an emergency contact, will you make major life changing decisions for my children?” Seriously, we had spent maybe 30 minutes together and I’m asking them if they’ll be emergency contacts for my children. So we just we just fast tracked and blew past any of the other layers and did the things that close friends do for each other. Someone in my network came into a new country and within, I don’t know 48 hours, had a major medical emergency and had to be medevaced leaving her kids behind with people she had met 48 hours earlier. That sort of emergency situation fast-tracks friendships. Even if you don’t have a lot in common, you do things that are extraordinary that create connection.  I know from one of my clients that she was in a country for maybe 10 days, and then one of our dear family members died, causing her to have to rely on the people she had been met just met for support, make arrangements for her to leave and then come back with that level of intimacy with these people that she’d only met a week ago. So stop treating your expat friendships like non-mobile friendships. We skip levels for better or for worse. Sometimes we don’t have the option. And there is the risk that when things calm down, when things get less wild and you might not have those shared core values that you would have with other friends, but still you’re connected. I mean I know going through some of the craziness that we went through in Burkina Faso really bonded us with people in ways that you don’t bond over a pizza on a Friday night. Like when you go through a political crisis together that creates closeness.  So, I believe we need a new paradigm. We need to stop seeing our expat friendships with the old model of non-mobile friendships. And I’ve got a suggestion on one way you can look at that.  Okay, so I have to confess something that’s kind of embarrassing but I turned 40 not long ago and part of being 40 was sort of getting my health up to speed and you know going to a doctor and taking vitamins and all of that. So my doctor gave me so many vitamins that I ended up going to the pharmacy and I bought one of those old lady pillboxes. You guys, i’m so embarrassed. I actually just went on a trip with my girlfriends and they saw my pillbox and they were like, “What are you 85? Like why? Why do you have that?” And so the pillbox I think is a great metaphor for expat friendships.  So let me explain, what If instead of this stable progressive pyramid, we looked at our friendships like vitamins? Okay, even in Switzerland they have something called vitamin B, which is the relationship vitamin, it’s Beziehung and means relationship. What if our friends were like vitamins in that pillbox and that pillbox was in our hearts, right? So when I’ve got, you know mine is like Monday through Friday, some pill boxes are more elaborate, but let’s say you imagine those pillboxes and it’s in your heart and there are some of the days that are wide open and you’re ready for a friendship that will nourish you. What if our friends were like vitamins and when we enter into a new space, we’re like, “oh my God this friendship feels nourishing.”  What kind of friendships feel nourishing right now?  Right, and then you grab those people and you put them in your heart, and just like with a prescription that your doctor gives you, sometimes your doctor looks even says “Listen.” My doctor just did this to me, she’s like “You’ve been taking vitamin B for a while, you’ve got it.” I don’t know if it was vitamin B or vitamin D, doesn’t really matter, I just did what she tells me. But it’s like “You’ve been taking this vitamin for a while, your reserves are good, it’s now time to stop.” And I was like, “I’m happy with my vitamin D, why do I have to stop vitamin D?” And she’s like “No really your body has enough, so now we’re going to take that out of the pillbox.” And then like, okay that’s like our friendship sometimes when people move even though it was super nourishing, we don’t have a choice that they might go out of the pillbox as regularly as they were showing up before.  Maybe your doctor says, yeah, you just take those vitamins when you need a boost, same thing with our friendships, sometimes we have friendships that are everyday, like your multivitamin every single day and sometimes our friendships shift geographically or time zone or whatever where we don’t get the luxury of having that every day. Don’t you see that? Doesn’t that help see it with less judgment? Like no one looks at you and says, “Well you should feel really bad about yourself for not having vitamin C anymore.” Like when a friend that you were really close to moves away and you don’t talk as often as you used to, why do we put that judgment on us? I just feel like those ways of seeing our friendships are not helpful.  So my sort of encouragement or invitation to you is to stop seeing your friendships in this old model and start exploring, what if we saw our friendships like this pill box? What if we let go of this idea that our friendships need to grow slowly and over time and then stay there forever? And instead said “I’m going to look at what feels nourishing”. What feels nourishing now and just love the crap out of them while they are there with you now, right until the doctor, the organization says they have to go away.  Let’s take it in now, because another way to look at this, I mean the way I see expat friendships, I feel like it’s the lottery, you you want to win but there’s no guarantees, right? And you never know what numbers are going to pop up. So when you arrive in that City, at that time and that person that feels nourishing to you is there at that exact City and exact time? I mean think about all the things that had to come together to bring you two on the planet and that location at that same time. That is like hitting the jackpot in this expat friendship Lottery. Seriously, if you get a friendship that is nourishing in that City at that time that is something to cherish.  And again, I’m resisting this idea. Like it’s almost like entitlement, like I deserve to have nourishing friends wherever I go. It’s like no, I mean how lucky are we? Because when you live in a sort of a homogeneous place, you’re born and raised in the same place, you share same language, you see share the same values, same customs. Like the likelihood of you connecting is higher because there’s so much you have in common. You throw someone on a airplane across the world in a completely different context, completely out of their comfort zone, you cannot expect that there’s just going to be this wide buffet of potential friends at your fingertips.  Let’s cherish the fact that we land on the planet at that time and that place and find someone who we connect with. This is a privilege not an entitlement that we get. And every time we find someone that’s nourishing we hit the jackpot. Right so celebrate that. Celebrate that when you have friendships that feel nourishing, and I think what we do is that we mourn that they can’t go on forever, that we can’t have wine face-to-face forever and I get that believe me, I’ve lived abroad for 20 years and there are friends that I have in my life or I’m just like “I want to see you face to face so hard right now.” I get that and there’s nothing wrong with that and nothing I’m saying right now is meant to shame you for feeling that way. My point is, is that we set an unrealistic expectation that that should be that way. Again jackpot like we got so lucky. So instead let’s celebrate the fact that we are able to come together in that moment of time and that place and nourish each other. And mourn the loss when that vitamin gets pulled out of your pill box on a daily basis, but be damn sure that you are going to nurture that relationship in a way that feels good going forward. And it’s really up to you, there’s no judgment. You know, what is the way that you want to stay connected with that one person that feels nourishing? Maybe that person is someone you want to fly across the world and see face-to-face, or maybe you just want to meet on FaceTime, you know, every once in a while or maybe just like saying hi on Facebook is enough. There’s no judgment. The measure is a minor issue in this relationship. Does this relationship feel nourishing? And be grateful for what you have shared. So, let’s look what we talked about, please let’s stop treating our expat friendships like non-mobile friendships. I invite you to consider this new paradigm, a pillbox where we’ve got these spaces in our hearts that are open and when it feels nourishing we slap the lid on top and we keep that in our hearts. And this celebration of this expat lottery of friendship, when we hit the jackpot ,that we get to have a connection with that person in that space at that time and this commitment to what feels nourishing and how can we nourish and nurture that friendship going forward without obligation, without stress without feeling heavy. Right, and I’m going to go back to what I always go back to, that to live abroad without regret you’ve got to love a crap out of your people. So get really clear on who are your people. Who are the people that you want to keep an ongoing relationship with? Who are the daily prescription of vitamin friendships that you want to keep trapped in your heart? How will you nourish and nurture those friendships and who are the ones that you want to nurture you? And this is an ongoing question. I think it’s about, some people call it your forever friends. The people that you want to focus your limited time and attention on and that might shift depending on what you need what feels nourishing at the time. But for me, I think it’s important in all the instability when close friends are leaving, right now one of my good girlfriends is leaving in June and that breaks my heart, it breaks my heart and I’m curious how we’ll nourish that friendship when we’re not face-to-face anymore. And what keeps me solid is that I have the stability of friends that I’ve known for a long time, and I know no matter where they are in the world are not going to go away. So who are those people that you want to focus on in times of instability of leaving when others have to go, where’s your foundation? Where do you have security? Who remains in your network? And those are the people you want to make sure that you love the crap out of, those are the people you want to think about how you can make a grand gesture for.  I’ll mention that podcast I did on grand gestures a little bit more detail later, but those are the people that you want to show up for and make sure they are trapped in that pill box in your heart. And I have a something that I don’t even know if I want to share because it’s so like in your face, but if you want something to create crystal clarity in who are your people? This is a guiding question, who would drive you to chemo? Who would you drive to chemo? If shit hit the fan and you were down, who would you want to be there? And who would you want to be there for? We have limited time and attention and this question is like a paralyzing slap in the face to help you get clarity on who your people are. Those are the people want to make sure that we’re loving the crap out of, because when push comes to shove they’re going to love the crap out of you. So there you have it, stop treating your expat friendships like non-mobile friendships. Embrace this pill box as a new paradigm and work to see your existing friendships like winning the friendship Lottery. Ask yourself when you look around at who’s in your life, what feels nourishing? Who are the people that feel nourishing and do more to love the crap out of them.  If you want more you can check out these episodes: Episode 64 “Love Your Friends And Family While They’re Alive.” Episode 53 “What Friends And Family Really Think About You Living Abroad.” And Episode 110 “Grand Gestures.” This is a big topic folks, I know we’ve just touched the surface but it’s something that can make the difference in your entire experience. So my invitation to you is just play with this metaphor. Look at how you have been seeing your friendships and explore what it would look like if you stop treating your expat friendships like non-mobile ones and start thinking about your friendships in terms of what is nourishing. Friendships are so important and we know this intuitively, but the reality is they’re actually critical for our health and well-being. So it’s really worth some extra thought. We need to find ways to live and to love our friends in ways that are guilt free, pressure free and full of love You’ve been listening to the Expat Happy Hour with Sundae Bean. Thank you for being here. I’ll leave you with the words of Steve Maraboli, author and behavioral scientist, “Friends are medicine for a wounded heart and vitamins for a hopeful soul.” Enjoy The Show?  Don’t miss an episode, subscribe via iTunes or RSS. Leave us a review in iTunes (or here for Android).  The post 122: Where We’ve Gone Wrong About Expat Friendships. appeared first on Sundae Schneider-Bean, LLC..

122: Where We’ve Gone Wrong About Expat Friendships.

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