More on Being Highly Sensitive with Candy Crawford
Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women
I begin this episode with some ideas for getting back to equanimity, in an essay I wrote recently called ‘How to Talk Yourself Out of a Funk.’ Next time you’re feeling downright despair, have a listen – or even now, to ward off your next blue mood. If you haven’t listened to our podcast #30, my initial conversation with Candy Crawford, it’s great – one of our most popular podcasts. The reason is that Candy is a highly astute, vulnerable, smart woman who focusses on a surprisingly hot topic. She teaches people about being a ‘Highly Sensitive Person’. I took this opportunity to coach Candy on her self-care, and share a few of my own thoughts about the world of sensitive people (I’m one, too.) But seriously, it was a little hard to be helpful to Candy, because her self-care is already so excellent. Instead, she ended up inspiring me! Here’s what I learned in our conversation: What the acronym DOES matters and what it does for HSP’s The real cost of disappointing others expectations The value of speaking your needs The difference between introverts and extroverts How HSP self-care shifts as we age The ultimate purpose in life … ahhhhh! RESOURCES Dr. Elaine Aron’s website The Highly Sensitive Person, Dr. Elaine Aron Candy Crawford, LCSW website MORE ABOUT CANDY Candy Crawford is a therapist, educator, and advocate for highly sensitive individuals. She maintains a private practice in the Chicago area, where she specializes in Sensory Processing Sensitivity, and facilitates workshops and retreats in collaboration with Dr. Elaine N. Aron, research psychologist, educator, and pioneer in the field of high sensitivity. Prior to her clinical practice, Candy spent over a decade championing the rights of diverse children and families as a public school social worker. This tenure, as well as the life-changing experience of mothering her two highly sensitive daughters, now young women, cemented Candy’s commitment and devotion to the long-neglected needs of the highly sensitive population.
Self-Care for Highly Sensitive People with Candy Crawford
Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women
Whether you’re a Highly Sensitive Person or not, you may enjoy the ideas in this particular podcast. At the very least you’re going to learn a lot about supreme self-care. Here we get into what those who move through life with extreme sensitivity need to keep in mind for safety and optimal health. I begin with my own reflections on how a Highly Sensitive Person (namely me) found my way through the worst crisis in my life – and what it taught me. Because each crisis is always a time of profound healing and learning … if you allow it in. They I sit down and chat with Highly Sensitive Person expert Candy Crawford. Candy is a wonderful soul with great empathy and wisdom for the world. She has studied at the right hand of the woman who basically started the Highly Sensitive Person movement, Dr. Elaine Aron. So she’s got the goods for sure. Here’s what I learned from Candy: What an HSP is What the acronym DOES matters and what it does for HSP’s Is there a spectrum for HSP’s? What the difference is between HSP’s and extroverts How being Highly Sensitive manifests in children Coping strategies for raising Highly Sensitive children Does being an HSP evolve with age? Coping strategies for being an HSP How to find your optimal level of stimulation in an overly stimulating world LINKS Dr. Elaine Aron’s website: https://hsperson.com The Highly Sensitive Person, Dr. Elaine Aron [LINK TO BOOK] BIO Candy Crawford is a therapist, educator, and advocate for highly sensitive individuals. She maintains a private practice in the Chicago area, where she specializes in Sensory Processing Sensitivity, and facilitates workshops and retreats in collaboration with Dr. Elaine N. Aron, research psychologist, educator, and pioneer in the field of high sensitivity. Prior to her clinical practice, Candy spent over a decade championing the rights of diverse children and families as a public school social worker. This tenure, as well as the life-changing experience of mothering her two highly sensitive daughters, now young women, cemented Candy’s commitment and devotion to the long-neglected needs of the highly sensitive population.
ERP 134: Sensitivity and Intimacy with Candy Crawford
Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide
GUEST: CANDY CRAWFORD Candy Crawford, MSW, LCSW, is a therapist, educator, and advocate for highly sensitive people. She maintains a private practice in the Chicago area, where she specializes in working with the highly sensitive and facilitates workshops and retreats in collaboration with Elaine Aron, research psychologist and pioneer in the study of this trait. (Please listen to the podcast episode or read the transcript to hear explanations, stories and examples.) HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON FACTS: Highly Sensitive Person is a layman’s term. The scientific name is Sensory Processing Sensitivity. It is innate and occurs in 20% of the population. Therefore, 1 in 5 people have this trait. It is not a disorder or developmental issue. It occurs equally in men and women. 70% are introverted. 30% are extroverted. The tendency is found in the immune system, as well as the central nervous system. It is found in over 100 animal species. FOUR PILLARS OF HSP: D.O.E.S. D: Depth of processing. O: Over arousal or overwhelm. E: Emotional intensity. S: Sensory sensitivity. “Our brain is processing information in a more concentrated form.” By Candy Crawford HOW DO I KNOW IF I AM HIGHLY SENSITIVE? If you think you might be a Highly Sensitive Person, you may want to take a self assessment test to get an indication (by Elaine Aron). Here are a couple of examples from Elaine Aron’s HSP Self-test: “I am easily overwhelmed by strong sensory input.” “I seem to be aware of subtleties in my environment.” “I have a rich, complex inner life.” “I notice and enjoy delicate or fine scents, tastes, sounds, works of art.” If you are a parent and want to determine if your child is a HSP, then you can take this self-test to identify if your child has the trait. BENEFITS AND CHALLENGES TO BEING A HSP People who are highly sensitive offer great gifts to the world. They typically offer unusual depth and complexity, tenderness, and conscientiousness. They tend to be great listeners, leaders, and loyal companions. They are often creative and compassionate. One of the main drawbacks of having this trait is 80% of the population doesn’t understand the experience of a highly sensitive person. Therefore, a highly sensitive person often feels misunderstood. Another consideration is that the demands of our modern, busy, chaotic world can feel overwhelming. “We exhibit such a full range of humanity.” by Candy Crawford Important notes: Self-care is a critical key to thriving as a highly sensitive person. HSP’s need daily down time. The goal is to strive for an Optimal Level of Arousal, which is where the nervous system is moderately alert and aroused, in that too much or too little stress can be problematic. “It requires a certain level of courage and a sense of self to live in alignment with your trait.” by Candy Crawford SENSITIVITY AND INTIMACY: HSP’s tend to get very bored in relationship. They don’t enjoy small talk and prefer deeper conversations. They enjoy discussing existential topics. They love to process about their relationships. They bring a level of intensity. They can become overwhelmed quickly when in conflict. They look for meaning and significance in relationship. Understanding and gaining education about the needs of the highly sensitive person can be helpful in enabling the couple to work together in collaboration rather than resorting to blame, comparisons, and criticism. Helpful ways to interact with a HSP: Take an interest in your partner. Be curious. What has moved you? What was something you wondered about today? Tips for a HSP: Know your limits. Remove yourself when you get overwhelmed. Take care of yourself. Communicate your needs. To learn an important suggestion in how to develop a stronger sense of self, please listen to the interview with Candy Crawford. “In relationship, you want two fully functioning independent people showing up.” by Candy Crawford MENTIONED: The Highly Sensitive Person, Elaine Aron (website) HSP Self-Test (self-test) Candy Crawford LCSW (website) The Highly Sensitive Person (book) Sensitive (documentary) Sensitive and In Love (documentary HSP and Horses (event) HSP Gatherings (event) Is Your Child Highly Sensitive? (self-test) TRANSCRIPT: Click on this link to access the transcript for this episode: If you have a topic you would like me to discuss, please contact me by clicking on the “Ask Dr. Jessica Higgins” button here. Thank you so much for your interest in improving your relationship. Also, I would so appreciate your honest rating and review. Please leave a review by clicking here. Thank you! ❤ If you are interested in developing new skills to overcome relationship challenges, please consider taking the Empowered Relationship Course or doing relationship coaching work with me.